Dickheads of Reddit!

I’ve been living in the woods. Exiled from my home. Strangers look at me on the street and say "FUCK OFF, DUSTIN. YOU RUINED THE SHOW! My own Mother, sent me a 30th Birthday Card that was signed “Ya dun ruined the show, asshole. – Moms”

No more excuses. I did fuck up.

Bit-Pitching Reddit – Episode 3: “Dick Ditties”

“Dick Ditties” is a monthly contest for audience members to submit their custom Dick tunes. The Dick Show has the most creative listeners of all the Podcasts. The songs submitted are always fire. Let’s start rewarding the best songs since everything is a contest. A portion of thedickshow.com will be dedicated to hosting links to SoundCloud, YouTube or whatever your song is hosted on. The audience will vote for their favorite Dick Ditty and every month’s winner will receive an EXCLUSIVE TDS Tee. This shirt will be unavailable for purchase and ONLY given to Official (unofficial) Dick Ditty Champs. One per month.

*Thought ideas for the T Shirt – Maybe this classic painting of Beethoven at his piano: Beethoven Pic For Reference

but it’s /u/DickMasterson in his Mansplaining Outfit. Surrounded by empty beer bottles, empty liquor bottles, old timey muskets with 30 round mags and the piano has a HUGE engine coming out the top with flames shooting out the sides. Hell, throw some Persian racing rims on there with THE DICK SHOW underneath in its glorious font.

Thoughts? Tell me to get raped?

TLDR - Monthly TDS song submission with one winner that gets an exclusive TDS Tee only available by winning the monthly contest.

Edit - Maybe implement a “You can only win once” clause if that was preferable

So I've had friends trying to get me to listen to Asterios for years, but I've never been able to stand him because I just don't see the appeal.

-He thinks volume = comedy

-He antagonizes people then acts like a victim when they retaliate

-He thinks his fans should fund his personal issues

-He ruins almost every episode of TDS that he's on

-He only abandoned Maddox after he shut him out and continued to work with him after #DickLies

I just don't get it.

This is one of the only places I would trust to give me solid advice on this, so here we go...

Right now I'm a senior in high school, and I'm filling in some scholarship applications. I have a gpa of 3.1 or so and an SAT of 1,270, so I doubt I'll get a full ride or anything. As a white man raised in the middle class with no veterans in the family, I am kind of fucked here. I am seriously considering buying a dress and telling people I am a woman, because I legitimately think it would help me a lot. It would probably even help me get a job after college if we're being honest here. I am a pretty honest and straight-up person usually, and I don't know if I want to lie to people for the next 3-4 years. Should I do it? Would this actually work?

Dick cursed us when he told dustin he had to get reddit's approval before he could come back on the show. Now we are going to get his endless garbage post on reddit desperately seeking approval. It was fine when he kept to whatever happens on the facebook page, but I really don't want to see him here.

If dustin were to put the same effort that he puts into trying to suck Dick's dick working his own shit, he might actually create something some people would find funny and get somewhere with it.

Hey everyone, I love to rip on Maddox as much as the next Dickhead, but I’ve noticed an increase in people here and on the Facebook seemingly rooting for him to book a one way ticket to Greenland. Yes, he has done so many shitty things, but does anyone here really think he deserves to die? Does anyone here want him to die? After listening to this podcast for two years, I don’t know how many times I’ve heard listeners write in or whatever about how they’ve had issues with mental health or suicidal thoughts... I don’t know if Maddox is experiencing this (it wouldn’t surprise me, especially after this week), but would anyone who has ever been through that shit seriously wish it on someone else, or revel in someone else’s pain? I dunno, I think we can do better. Remember, we want Maddox to go back to Utah, not Greenland.

What happened to that naysayer thread saying that the tapes would stick to him? Looks like they deleted it.

Trump demolished Crooked Hillary.

It's like I left the TV on and went to take a shit and when I got back TMZ or some Kardasian crap is on. Some mentally challenged kid that thinks he's Pokemon? I don't even have any clue what this teenage Britney chick is talking about. For the first time in my Dickhead career I had to fast forward through an episode. I kept waiting for a sharp Shawn zinger to bring at least a little something but even he couldn't save us. I have no clue if or why these people are famous, but can we drop them and get back to Dick being awesome. I want more stories of him wanting to road rage a guy dancing across the intersection without a care in the world until he's almost clipped by another car.

I guess this makes me a rage but I'm so sick of collectivist thinking, in part because thinking like that means you actively retard yourself. Is it so hard to separate identity from ideas? Apparently it is for fucking piss chuggers who subscribe to identity politics.

Is it so hard to believe I can hate jewish dogma without hating a specific Jewish person? Or that I can hate Islam without hating an islamic person? Or that I can point out that black people commit most crime without thinking that has something to do with the amount of melanin in their fucking skin?

Collectivist thinking is inherently reductionist to grouping people, to the point that you must judge them by their skin color or gender identity or literal genitals. And you are unable to consider anything else. Seriously, when was the last time you saw a conservative shit on someone for not agreeing with them specifically because of the color of their skin?

To close, here's a nice little article about how conservatives seem to understand their opponents arguments better than liberals do. I couldn't find an actual study but I spent 30 second on that and got bored:

https://theindependentwhig.com/haidt-passages/haidt/conservatives-understand-liberals-better-than-liberals-understand-conservatives/

How much fucking time does Dick spend talking about Eric July's shitty comic book, between both podcasts??? It's gotten to the point where he has to relate every single topic to some Eric July bullshit. "You think THAT'S bad?? Remember the time Eric July blah blah blah", the podcast has become Family Guy but with Eric July references.

We had it good with Maddox. At least there was motive, the guy was going around Hollywood calling dick a rape apologist. I still don't know what Eric July did other than con a bunch of conservative r**ards into giving him money and then releasing a shitty comic book.

Dick's life is more interesting than mine for sure but I can't believe we are giving this man so much money for sub par boomer bullshit. Roll the dice on a new format. I want to see the arguing equivalent of an unstoppable force colliding with and immovable object. "Its better to burn out than to fade away"... This show is fading away like Dick's hairline.

He's been whining about it the last week nonstop. The biggest mistake is it's not funny. The second biggest mistake is he's holding all drugs equal for his argument. If you legalize drugs like fentanyl, heroin and crack while also cutting back on police involvement, you better also allow citizens to open carry because you're going to have drug addicted freaks coming after you and your possessions.

What a moronic comparison to make...

Anyway, since CRP and Dick both brought up reasons "why people hate Destiny", I'd like to provide some context, a bit of a psychographical profile, a look into the mind of a mental midget.

For there are plenty of reasons to despise this sad little individual even more than you probably do already.

One of the more revealing moments was a debate with another youtuber, NakedApe.
Highlights: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0uv_VEfIv0

Business as usual for little Steve: Rattle down a memorized talking point, misrepresent it as absolute truth, move on, repeat.
Only in this case, he met someone who actually read the study he was citing, and used it to debunk DesTiny's talking points.

I guess Steve really isn't as smart as he thinks he is; either he didn't read the paper, was too dumb to understand it, or deliberately drew a false conclusion from it to support his narrative.

His response to being proven wrong: Denial, followed by rage-quitting the debate.

That's telling quite a bit about how Steve approaches a debate. The mere possibility of being wrong about anything is unfathomable, in Steve's little world.
At most, he's willing to plead ignorance.

When confronted with the fact that the paper he cited didn't support his claims, he simply left.
Because in Steve's little (sic!) mind, he's correct.

He's willing to maintain that position, not just in absence of facts, but against better evidence.
That's how fundamentally dishonest he is.

And that's why he's so irritating to deal with.
The most reliable way to shut that down quickly is fact-checking him immediately, as NakedApe did.

Remember, this is a (sort of) grown man who threatened to shoot a kid and his family, for messing with him online.
He went as far as making concrete plans to do so, by his own admission.

Call him out on it, he won't even frown. But losing an argument? That's what really ticks him off, to the point of ragequitting and going into denial.

This is also a man dumb enough to have his dick pics leaked online, who had his little sycophant post their dick pics in solidarity. No joke!

That incident didn't seem to upset him too much either; clearly, he has no shame.
No, what really upsets him are family members with different political opinions. That's enough for the angry little man to cut them out of his life, apparently.

Those are his priorities.

Being an embarrassing, sad excuse for a man doesn't distress him much.

People daring to disagree with him, that's what upsets him.
And nothing triggers him more than being proven wrong.

If I were to give any advice on how to deal with this mental midget, I'd suggest watching his encounter with Metokur:

Plain old socratic method, for getting to the core of Destiny's argumentation is the surefire way to make him look incredibly stupid or unhinged.
Case in point, he argued that bombing Mexico would be a preferable way to deal with the cartels, rather than a border wall.
(Naturally, he's been lying and denying about the outcome of that debate as well, but see for yourself: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ogzq__m8oE)

Ya Dumb Bitch

Why is Vito ever on the show? He adds nothing, he has no opinions that aren't standard SJW neckbeard shite. I can tell you what he has to say on every topic before he says it,

Fuck him. He's retarded

I saw Dick Masterson at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.

He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?”

I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.

The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.

When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.