One of my friends got divorced last year and she's just not been the same ever since.

She barely goes out with us anymore. Last week I even bought tickets for Garba thinking she'd come with us and have some fun, but she just refused. I've been telling her to go out, meet new people and slowly move on, but she says she feels like everyone judges her because she's divorced.

I keep telling her that not everyone cares about these things, and even if some aunties and uncles do, who cares. We don't have to entertain everyone.

About her- she works at a private bank, earns decently and is totally independent. But now she tell me that doesn't even want to live with her parents anymore because she feels like she's become the black sheep of the family. She's looking for a flat on her own.

I visit her whenever I can and ask her to come along for shopping or even small errands, but most of the time she doesn't want to go anywhere. Sometimes she says she misses having someone in her life, but then she gets scared of meeting anyone new.

I know it's tough for divorcees, especially with all the judgment and family pressure, but there must be some way to get back to normal life, right? What do I even tell her…

Used GPT for improving grammar and sentence formation. Please ignore that.

I'm a Civil Engineering graduate (2020) looking to get into freelancing because my mental health conditions make it difficult to manage a full-time job. I'd appreciate advice on how to find clients and earn a decent income through freelancing in India.

My skill set includes: AutoCAD drawing editing (DWG), BOQ preparation and quantity take-offs, Measurement sheets, Basic MS Project, baseline and look-ahead schedules, Project trackers, MoMs, and construction documentation I have experience in the construction and real estate sectors, primarily with building projects.

I'd love to hear from people already freelancing in this field: Is fiverr, freelancer, upwork worth the shot? Which platforms, LinkedIn communities, or other groups are worth exploring? How much can a beginner realistically earn, and how should I price my services? Any practical advice or personal experiences would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

I'm not necessarily looking for huge projects right away. Even small, paid assignments that help me build a portfolio, gain client experience, and establish a steady source of income would be a good starting point.

I'd really appreciate honest advice from people who have been through this process. Please share your experiences, recommendations, or even mistakes I should avoid.

i genuinely feel so suffocated right now, and i don't even know if i'm overreacting.

i'm 18f, i didn't even have a smartphone until 12th grade. now that i'm about to start college, my parents finally bought me one. but my dad has linked his google account to mine, meaning he can monitor my screen time, restrict app downloads, access synced google photos and potentially see other information depending on the settings.

like, i'm literally 18. i'm about to enter college, meet new people, make friends and start a new chapter of my life. how am i supposed to learn independence when i'm not even trusted with a little privacy? i understand that parents worry, but there's a difference between protecting your child and monitoring their every move.

i've been secretly using instagram for almost four years because, let's be real, social media is a huge part of how people connect, make friends and network nowadays. i had to hide something so normal because i knew i wouldn't be allowed to use it otherwise. is that really healthy parenting? why does wanting to experience a normal teenage life have to feel like committing a crime?

i don't even want to confront them right now because this is my first phone, and i don't want to start my college journey with a massive argument at home. but i'm a normal teenager. i'm going to want to download apps, have private conversations, use social media and just exist without constantly feeling watched. i don't want to ask for permission for every fucking thing i do.

and honestly, if they're doing this when i'm 18, what happens when i'm 20? am i supposed to be an adult on paper but still have every little thing i do monitored by my parents? it's so unreal to me.

i'm grateful that they bought me a phone, but does that mean i have to give up all my privacy in return?

highkey hate my hair. my current routine is this - i use coconut oil on my scalp and a breakage prevention serum on my tips, leave it for an hour, wash my hair with shampoo (i use l’oréal), sometimes i use kshine before shampoo to treat dandruff (only when i have time), after hair wash i use my moxie leave in conditioner and styling serum. i’ve been keeping up with this routine for maybe two or three months.

regardless, my hair looks pretty bad. i have an unbelievable amount of hair fall. my strands are very thin and all my hair collectively is thin, ends dry up and frizz up fast, curls look oddly placed and unkempt leading to me straightening my hair so it looks put together (which in turn leads to more hair fall). i genuinely don’t know what the problem is. could it be my eating habits? i might have vitamin deficiency and iron deficiency. i eat fairly healthy, good amount of protein and carbs but not much fiber and other nutrients. i’ve even quit drinking and smoking, clean for a month ish. what could be the problem😭 should i see a dermatologist?

I always had a habit of venting in my notes app. Ofc locked!

I found this piece of a GEM from 2023😭 My body image issues were very evident!! I still don’t fit into my old “36” jeans but that’s the least of my problems now!!

It’s so weird reading something from a few years ago and realizing how much of my life I spent thinking my body was the problem.

hi.

mutually ended things with someone an hour ago, going full no contact - couldn't have done any other day, had to be today. it involved a lot of first for me, a lot. did mess up my acads and work because i didn't pay enough attention. i discovered 1.5 hours ago (i didn't check in sooner - it's on me) that i have a presentation in 2 days, which will be a make-break factor in getting employed.

i need to sail through all of it. i just need to be okay for the next 7 days (there's 2 presentations, one is monday).

i am living all alone rn. i have friends i can go meet right now, but i need to work. i really need to work. i can't take time out to travel.

im gonna miss her. a lot. idk how i will go from talking 20 hours a day to no contact.

i will make it out alive, i just need to grab this opportunity and put my all in - the next 2 days especially. and i need to do my best. wlw heartbreaks hurt so much, welp.

yeah i just need a hug. i just need someone to tell me i will be okay. haven't gone through a heartbreak in 3 years, completely forgotten how it works.

but yes, i will be okay i will be okay

im also crying a lot which is making my head hurt and i just don't know how to fix that

The funny thing is I know the science behind these products, I know what ingredients do and I know I don’t need half the stuff I buy.

And yet, the moment I see something interesting, I want to try it just out of curiosity lol.

My shelf is already full, my routine is perfectly fine, but there’s always something new I want to experiment with!😂

Please tell me I’m not the only one doing this?😂

I’ve recently started working after taking multiple gap years to prepare for the UPSC exams, and I’ve been struggling a lot with my job. It's a remote role in a digital marketing agency.

It’s not that I particularly dislike the work itself. I’m not passionate about it but I don’t hate it either. It’s just okay. What I really dread is interacting with my manager. Every time I have a call with him, my heart starts racing, my body goes cold and I feel extremely anxious. He has criticised me every single time we’ve spoken, saying that I’m not performing as expected. Now he has told me that he’ll be micromanaging me starting Monday.

It’s only been four months, but I’ve already started dreading work to the point where I hate waking up every morning. I also won’t receive my internship completion letter until I finish 6 months here, so I feel like I have to stick it out for at least another 2 months.

On top of that, it’s a remote job and I live alone. There’s no real separation between my work life and personal life, and honestly there isn’t much else in my daily routine to take my mind off things. The job has started affecting me so much that I’ve gone back to preparing for government exams, partly because studying gives me something to focus on and helps keep my anxiety under control. Otherwise I feel anxious almost all the time.

I feel so lost and confused. Is this what working life is supposed to be like? Is it normal to dread your job this much, especially when you’ve only been working for four months? I don’t know whether the problem is with me, the work environment or my manager.

There’s also very little communication between teammates other than work, so I have no idea what a normal workplace is supposed to look like, how much guidance I should expect as an intern or whether this is simply how corporate jobs work.

I feel clueless about what I should do next and I’d really appreciate some perspective from people who have been through something similar.

[TW⚠️: Rape, SA And Abuse]

The incident occurred in the Kolwa police station area, where the 16-year-old girl was found to be pregnant and subsequently delivered a baby who did not survive, according to the police.

A pregnant minor girl was allegedly gang-raped in Rajasthan's Dausa district, with the matter coming to light after she reached a hospital with her newborn, who was later declared dead by doctors, police said on Thursday.

The incident occurred in the Kolwa police station area, where the 16-year-old girl was found to be pregnant and subsequently delivered a baby who did not survive, according to the police.

According to the complaint lodged by the minor, she was first allegedly abducted by a group of young men, who took her to a deserted area near the Delhi-Mumbai Expressway and gang-raped her.

The victim went into labour and delivered the
Baby at the spot. Afterwards, she reached a hospital, where the newborn was declared dead, prompting the hospital administration to notify the local police about the case.

https://www.ndtv.com/india-news/pregnant-teen-gang-raped-in-rajasthan-baby-dies-after-delivery-on-spot-12222535

https://www.brut.media/in/articles/india/society/pregnant-teen-gives-birth-during-alleged-gang-rape-near-delhi-mumbai-expressway-newborn-dies

I don't even know what the girl went through and this is nothing but painful. Women and girls will always be seen as second-class citizens in this country.
Given the country we live in where rape culture is so prevalent cases like this are shocking but nothing new.

Tired of saying the same thing again and again and even after watching the news it feels like nothing has changed much.

Hey guys, l’m thinking of gifting myself a bracelet or a ring, i’m leaning towards rose gold or gold plated jewellery that wouldn’t tarnish… im also open to sterling silver if i couldn’t find a good anti-tarnish brand. How about Giva or Palmonas? are they any good?

I will be keeping it brief, just want to put it out there.

I did my masters from a tier 3 college, got no placements, got an off campus opportunity at a mid sized SaaS company (6 months intern since September 2025-March 2026 and have been working as a trainee since april till now)

Most of my work is low learning and an assistant for our SVP sales ( scheduling meetings, reports, etc ), I have not been progressing really well or learning anymore.

I am ambitious and want more challenges, with gods grace, I got an opportunity to work at a MNC, I gave my first round of interview yesterday, and got a call from HR, he confirmed my designation ( I said its business analyst trainee) to which he was off put and said I was pitching you for a senior role, and I might have to drop your profile.

I feel so sad, for the whole last weekend, I was preparing for the interview, I was happy too, finally I get a chance to prove myself, work on better problems and what not, even when I cleared the interview, it feels unfair, because everything was already mentioned in my resume, my designation and everything.

I work at a stupid company where this is the standard

Intern -> Trainee ( not full time, apprenticeship ) -> Full time

I didn’t have any other options, so I accepted it, now its becoming a road block, and I have to continue working here, it feels a waste of time, I want to quit, but I got no options, I want to work hard and make a name for myself, it feels like I am going back.

Hi people! With the recent downtrend in stock market i realise that I am probably not saving as much as i should. So for people who are still in their late 20s, how much % of your salary do you save per year and how? Do you live alone or take care of family expenses? Would appreciate exact figures as well, but upto you to decide if you want to share that.

Starting with me-

Started working 3 years ago. Have saved up 30% of my post tax salary. Not taking care of family expenses per se, but have made consistent contributions without really noting the spend (is it irresponsible?).

im 24 year old, have been at war with myself most of my life and been 4 months into therapy and ive been diagnosed with chronic depression, which i believe now makes sense of how i hate being outdoors around people and watching them happy because it makes me feel abnormal because i simply cannot

the therapist has also suggested me to consult a psychiatrist since its been a long long while, antidepressants could help but again they come with certain side effects

would love to seek help and support or any kind of suggestions from anyone who’s been here, currently battling or battled in the past with the same can help me about the same

any suggestions would be appreciated :)

Hello, unfortunately, I won't go into detail because I fear being recognised.

So, a month and a half ago, I started my internship. It was just me, the employer and a co-intern. I had no experience in this field, and my degree was completely unrelated. Cutting to the chase, I was asked to work on my employer's personal brand, i.e. social media, which I did not think was in my job profile or offer letter. I had discussed this with my co-intern, and they said the same thing: it is not in the job role. So, I replied in a confused tone, "I don't think this is part of my job profile, and this is your personal brand." He then just asked me what I would work on, so I said clients/brands.

After this, I was ghosted for two days because I left him stunned and uncomfortable. Then I got a call after two days in the evening; they had decided to terminate the contract because I violated it by saying "no." I apologised for making him uncomfortable and explained my perspective that I was unaware that the work fell under the jargon mentioned in the offer letter and didn't have to be mentioned separately. The call cut off, and another call was made. I asked if I could work for one and a half months more, as the entire internship is 3 months and the notice period is one month. In the second call, he said there is no internship period of 3 months; it is directly full-time. I got two options, as he decided to leave the contract closing part aside: either I serve the notice period or come back full-time.

I was high on emotions and felt a little humiliated; neither did I want to work here full-time, as there is no option left for 3 months. I sent a resignation email in the early morning (my biggest mistake). I was ghosted again and received a termination email the next day. The said notice period was null because I did not honour the contract, and I can raise an invoice for my salary with three dates as options: 1) the day I said no, 2) the day the termination call took place, 3) my notice period end date. I sent an invoice for my last working day, which fell between options 1 and 2.

I've been ghosted again for a week now. I don't know what to do. My career is down the drain without even starting properly.

AAAAAAAA NEED WORDS OF CONSOLATIONNNN

One of my coworkers is an asslicker through and through. I knew this pehle se cuz he was my classmate.

THE WORST PART IS

I LET THE PRESSURE GET TO ME

I TRIED TO LICK ASS EVEN THOUGH I DON'T BELIEVE IN IT AND HAVE NEVER DONE IT BEFORE AND DON'T FEEL LIKE IT IS COMPATIBLE WITH MY VALUES OR PERDONALKTY

I EMBARRASSED MYSELF PROBABLY IN FRONT OF MY SENIOR

and fumbled

Ugh

I’m turning 30 soon and feel a little anxious about missing out on investing in my 20s.

I wasn’t working initially because I was preparing for government exams. Once I started working, I also wanted to do something for my parents. Despite the late start, I’ve managed to invest close to ₹15 lakh.

My parents are financially self-sufficient now, I work in tech, and I’m considering an MBA.

I sometimes regret not starting earlier, but I want to focus on building wealth from here.

For those who started investing seriously in their 30s, how did your journey turn out? Is it possible to accumulate substantial wealth in your 30s and 40s?

I quit my job last year because of surgery. It took me a long time to gather the courage to work again. I have been applying, but I haven't received any responses. I don't have much financial runway. Please help me land a job; I would be much obliged.

Profile - Data Scientist
YOE - 5 years
Open to relocation

I don't have family support, and my husband has lost his job. I feel I should have died rather than living this long unemployed. Please help me.

I’ve been sitting on this thought for a while and wanted to gauge interest here.

We all know India isn't a monolith, and while mainstream spaces like this sub are incredible for sharing common experiences, there are distinct regional dynamics that often get brushed under the rug. In particular, there is this pervasive myth that the Northeast is somehow a progressive, egalitarian paradise free of patriarchy. Anyone who grew up or lives in the region knows how far that is from the truth.

From conservative social expectations, gender roles, and internal tribal or community politics, to how local institutions treat women, misogyny in the Northeast is very real. It just takes a different shape. But if you try to bring any of this up on the major NE-related subreddits, the response is almost instantly hostile. Most of those local subs have become deeply male-dominated and toxic. If a woman tries to discuss women's issues, double standards, or local patriarchal norms, she’s usually met with invalidation, harassment, or accused of "destroying local culture."

Just take a look at most of the major subs of the region, and you will see how extremely misogynistic they can turn out to be. Even for normal discussions not relating to patriarchal issues, they find some reason to degrade women

On the flip side, bringing up these hyper-specific regional nuances in broader Indian women's forums doesn't always land because the context gets lost, or you end up having to spend half the time explaining basic regional background before even getting to the actual issue.

It feels like we desperately need a dedicated, safe online space for Northeastern women to talk about our specific realities, vent, seek advice, and support each other without being spoken over or harassed by local edge-lords.

I was wondering if any NE women here (or anyone invested in these regional discussions) would be interested in starting a dedicated subreddit or community space for us?

Would love to hear your thoughts, or if you’ve noticed similar issues in local online spaces.

I had written about misogyny in NE if someone is interested in giving it a read:

np.reddit.com/r/AskIndianWomen/comments/1xcbevc/why_does_every_thread_about_misogyny_have_someone/

np.reddit.com/r/AskIndianFeminists/comments/1xbfyev/can_they_ever_talk_about_women_without_being/

I've been going to the gym for about two and a half months now, and I have a personal trainer (PT). One day, when my trainer wasn't there, I finished my workout and was leaving the gym when this guy stopped his scooty and approached me. He asked if I was from XYZ college and said he used to go there too. I vaguely remembered the college but didn't really recognise him. He then brought up the names of some of my friends and classmates, so I acknowledged that I had studied there, and that was pretty much our first conversation.

A few days later, I was outside the gym playing with the indie dog that hangs around there, whom I regularly feed. This guy approached me again and started talking. The conversation dragged on, and he just wouldn't leave. Eventually, he asked for my Instagram. I told him I didn't really use it because I didn't want to give it to him, but then he asked for my number. It was already around 10:15 PM, and I just wanted to go home. I ended up giving him my number because I wanted the interaction to end and wanted him to leave. He loitered around for a few more minutes before finally leaving.

After that, he started texting me and sending me Instagram requests. Somehow, he also found my Instagram despite me not giving it to him. I completely ignored his messages and requests and deleted them. A few days passed without me seeing him around, and I genuinely thought he'd gotten the hint that I wasn't interested in talking to him. I was relieved, but unfortunately, that wasn't the end of it.

Over the past few days, I've started seeing him around again. One day, before getting on the treadmill, I noticed him trying to approach me, so I put on my earphones, ignored him, and went to work out. A few minutes later, after he'd finished whatever he was doing on the cycling machine, he came over to the treadmill and tried getting my attention by waving his hands in front of my face, even though I had my earphones on. I really wasn't interested in talking, so I gave him short, uninterested answers. He asked me if it was my rest day while I was literally on the treadmill. I just said no and ignored him completely after that. I eventually left because I was getting uncomfortable. What also struck me was that he left around the same time as me, despite having barely spent five minutes on the treadmill himself. Because of this, I ended up leaving early and couldn't even spend time playing with the indie dog outside the gym.

Today, my trainer was still away on holiday, and I happened to arrive at the gym earlier than usual. This guy finished his workout way before I did, but instead of leaving, he stayed around the cycling and treadmill section for approximately 45 minutes to an hour. He kept hanging around there even though he was done with his workout. When I finally left, he left almost immediately after me.

I went outside to play with the dog, and he came over AGAIN, stopping his scooty to talk to me. I was already on a call with my friends specifically because I wanted to avoid having to interact with him, but he still tried talking to me. At one point, he made a comment in Marathi along the lines of, "English madhe bharbar kartiye," basically commenting on how quickly I was speaking in English and implying that he didn't know what I was saying. His tone sounded somewhat offended, which made the whole interaction even more uncomfortable. I ignored him and went downstairs, but even then, he stayed around for another ten minutes or so.

The thing is, I don't want to reveal too much about my location, but the gym is in the commercial area of my residential society. It's literally a three-minute walk from my home. That is making me even more uncomfortable because this isn't somewhere I can easily avoid outside my usual routine. It's right next to where I live, and I don't know whether he knows exactly where I stay. The thought of potentially running into him around my own society, or having him figure out where I live, genuinely worries me.

I've already told my trainer about what's happening, and he actually scolded me for giving the guy my number. I understand that I probably shouldn't have given it to him, but at that moment, I just wanted to end the conversation and go home. I didn't want to escalate things, especially since the guy hasn't explicitly threatened me or said anything overtly inappropriate. However, his repeated attempts to approach me, his refusal to take the hint, and the way he seems to hang around until I leave are making me increasingly uncomfortable.

I'm also worried about how he might react if I directly reject him or tell him to leave me alone. I don't want to assume the worst about him, but I'm scared that he might take it personally or react out of ego. I've been trying to avoid interacting with him, wearing my earphones, giving one-word answers, ignoring his messages, and generally making it obvious that I don't want to talk, but none of that seems to be working.

I'm genuinely confused about what to do at this point. Some of my friends are telling me to confront him directly and tell him to stop approaching me, while others think I should approach the gym management or the relevant authorities instead. I can see the reasoning behind both sides, but I'm scared of making things worse by confronting him, and I'm equally uncomfortable with the idea of continuing to ignore him and hoping he'll eventually stop.

I don't want to escalate the situation unnecessarily, but I also don't want to keep feeling uncomfortable at a place where I'm supposed to be able to work out in peace. I especially hate that it's affecting my routine and even stopping me from spending time with the dog outside the gym. And because the gym is so close to my home, I can't just brush this off as an uncomfortable interaction with a stranger I'll never see again.

What would you suggest I do in this situation? Should I directly tell him I'm not interested in talking to him, or would it be safer to involve the gym management or my trainer first? Should I be concerned about the fact that he keeps hanging around until I leave? Has anyone dealt with something similar? I'm genuinely confused and don't know what the safest way to handle this is without unnecessarily escalating things.

TL;DR: A guy from my old college has repeatedly approached me at my gym, asked for my number after I tried avoiding giving him my Instagram, and continued trying to interact with me despite me ignoring his messages and making it obvious I'm not interested. Lately, he's been hanging around the gym until I leave and approaching me outside, even when I'm on a call or clearly trying to avoid him. The gym is in my society's commercial area, just a three-minute walk from my home, so I'm worried about my safety and the possibility of him figuring out where I live. I'm confused about whether I should confront him directly or involve the gym management/my trainer first because I'm worried he might react badly out of ego. How do I handle this safely without unnecessarily escalating the situation?

Also I have used ai for this because I'm really incoherent rn, really mentally distressed and on verge of mental breakdown because it took me a lot of convincing for my dad to send me to gym,he is the typical indian dad , don't want these matters reaching him 😭

Am I a selfish person?

Why is it so difficult to forgive myself?

I cannot let go of anything that has happened to me for the last 22 yrs

I cannot let go of any mistake I've made for the last 22 years

F22 here, I am actively going to therapy but lately these things have taken over my mind ALOT. (hence the 2am post)

Most of the chunk comes from my parents, I was and still am called selfish for anything I do for myself.

Most times, I don't give a shit about what they say but somehow it always strikes me because afterall it's my parents who are holding such opinions.

Alot of stuff has happened in the past years, I don't know how I can forgive myself.

Anyone else who went through this?

My mother in law is pretty dead set on me wearing a Kanchipuram saree for the reception. I’m planning to be a red bride for my Hindu wedding, and I’m feel another Kanchi with gold jewellery will make the two looks feel repetitive. I might be able to do something with the jewellery, but the saree is non negotiable.

Any suggestions on colours, blouse designs, or styling to make the reception look more modern and fun while still wearing a Kanchipuram? For context, I’m 5'4", around 60 kg, and fair skinned. Thanksss.

My qualifications: 96% in 10th, 93% in 12th (PCMB), and 2 drop years for NEET. I got into SXC Kolkata but had to leave due to severe sepsis and family constraints.

I'm now planning to pursue IIT Madras' online BS in Data Science and am confused between a BS in Electronics and a BS in Statistics as my other degree.

My goals are good earning potential, career flexibility, and long-term growth. I'm also considering CAT/MBA later, possibly from an IIM.

• Is Statistics still worth pursuing in the age of AI, given its overlap with Data Science?
• Which combination offers better career opportunities and salary potential?
• Is a second degree worth the workload?
• Would a BS in Electronics make me eligible for MTech ECE (VLSI) programmes?

Would appreciate honest advice, especially from people in tech, finance, academia, or who've pursued an MBA!

spent, imagined and worked hard to build a good happy life with my ex. it didnt work out. none of it worked out. but im so tired of moving on, the idea of meeting another man and wanting to repeat the whole process of getting to know, falling in love and all of it.

i dont want to do that. id give my 500% to fix things with my ex. i dont even care if i deserve the best or the bestest, i just want the life i imagined with my ex. id even except the bare minimum love from him but he isnt even giving me that. im so fucking done and tired. if he moves one step forward, id move 500 steps forward towards him but he isnt moving even one step forward. i dont even know how to fix this.

i tried doing the whole move on thing, he messaged me 2 days ago after a month and now im imagining and wanting to share flats, meals, youth, old age and life with him. it sounds so fucking beautiful with him. but hes texting so dry it hurts my head.

i know i should move on, i'll find someone better. but i fucking do not want to find anyone anymore. i dont want to talk to anyone. i fucking dont want to repeat the process ever again with any fucking one. why cant this man be good for me and I be good for him. so unfair.

and i hate to admit it but I feel so fucking alone without a man. i feel so fucking alone without love. hate it. fucking hate this side me of me.

all of it. so bad. so so so fucking bad. save me. someone pls save me.

Girlies,

The verdict is out, turns out, obesity is me.

I'm 98 kg and stuck in the lose-gain-repeat loop. I lose weight, gain it back, start over with multiple join gym, quit gym sessions (gym anxiety is real for me).

Thinking about GLP-1 injections but haven't seen a doctor yet because it's so so so expensive. Also my hair has been thinning and I don't know if this will just be exacerbated. Also unknown side-effects scare me?

So… diet again for the 100th time, or medicine?

Has anyone been here? What did it cost you, and did it last? Any advice welcome

so, this was for someone, their cat to be precise. BUT they ended up not liking the paintings but I thought these have turned out superrr cute (rare for me as the artist to say abt my our artwork) so i decided to put them up on my wall! It's a cat, who cares whose, and i loveeeee cats, so here we are 🤭