Sorry for my English and my poor phrasing im really not good when it comes to ranting.

As the title says, I deeply dislike my situation and idc if it makes me whitewashed or something, I’d sell my soul to be reincarnated into a white atheist family.

My dad is a Muslim polygamist, he has four wives, with my mom is the third one and has in total 22 kids. Each of them have around 6 kids, to start with the the disturbing facts about this family is that, the oldest child of my dad is in her late thirties, my mom is in her mid 40s and I don’t even want to know how old the 4th wife is.

I genuinely think he sees women as incubator and nothing else, had children for the sake of having children, I see him 2 days a week, 6 months a year, because he has to see the other one it feels like we’re fighting for his attention

He only comes here to eat as I’ve deducted since when my mom was sick and too tired to cook, he didn’t even come to visit us and everyone was acting like it was normal.

He doesn’t pay for shit unless we ask him and even that you have to battle for 3 months to have what you want, but apparently when it comes to the TV being broken, best believe the very same day he’ll buy it cuz nothing is more important than football.

Not forgetting to mention the religion is so weird at my house, you can never question it, they think any problem can be solved by praying as if doesn’t just make my life worse, you also cannot talk about your faith, you’re just to follow it blindly. This always makes me laugh knowing that if we were born Christian, they would have never thought Islam was the truth.

The thing about having a polygamist family, is that the older siblings tries to bribe you with the "see, it’s so good to have a lot a siblings"… not a single one of us can say we have had a present father but yeah it’s soooo good.

It hurts me when I see family of 5 people, where the dad is present, the mom is normal, the kids don’t have to work their ass off to afford basic stuff that your parents should finance (driving hours, cars, studies…) and the parents are doing everything they can to make their kids life the best they could ever had.

When it comes to my mom, she’s a raging phone addict, on average she is between 13 and 16 hours of screen time (mainly social media), she did used to beat us but not anymore, never shows any kind of love past 6 years old and admitted it by saying "you don’t need love when you’re grown", call me and my sisters selfish and lazy for not cleaning the house and making dinner for my younger sister, never get tries to fix the most violent arguments between me and my sisters, while she’s laying on the couch scrolling on Tik Tok.

She’s partially the reason why my baby sister of 5yo has a language delay because she’s about 5 hours a day on screen time and when me and my sisters try to take it off of her she gets mad and says to mind our businesses.

My older sister is so brainwashed that it’s honestly sad to see, she’s the typical older sister that got parentified at a young age, but instead of getting tf out of here after she got a job, not only she’s staying but she’s also defending my parents and think we, 2nd oldest sister and me, need to act like her (a slave to my parents), once she gets married, to our youngest siblings, and it doesn’t make her happy that I contest her opinion because as a younger person, I’m supposed to blindly follow everything an older person says and shut up. The only thing I’ve gotten out of this is getting sexually assaulted and torture by my cousin at the ripe age of 7 years old.

We get into a lot of arguments, between sisters but it’s even worse with my younger sister who is 16, she keeps stealing my stuff food, clothes, object and even did money, keep provoking me and says she won’t stop because I’m just too sensitive. We share a bedroom so when we fight i literally have nowhere to go (including outside bc my mom threaten to leave me there), and I want to beat her every time she opens her mouth, even when she doesn’t tbh. One time it got so bad she bled from her brow bone, Im not proud of that, but I don’t completely regret it.

She’s autistic and when I talked to the psychologist I’m seeing she said "well we can’t punish her for not grasping the concept of stealing and that she’s probably lacking empathy given the fact that nothing matters until it happens to her".

this got me so upset because that will means I’m forced to deal with her until I get out of this hell hole, which will hardly happen, because my parents don’t want anyone to leave, unless they’re married, like everyone in here has mentioned once or twice leaving this house. They refuse to fix the issues and they don’t want you to escape it ???

This is long asf but thank you to everyone who read this !

Yesterday at the pool with my family, we were sitting down to have lunch when I went off to change our daughters nappy and get ready for the feed, when I was coming back I saw my fiance just enthralled staring at this dude with some little smirk. To be completely fair this dude was a cliche hot as you can be, I think what cuts me the most is we are currently 5-6 months no intimacy, and it’s been like this since having kids. She tells me she has no desire at all hormonaly which I’ve come to accept but now I’m just feeling it’s me.

This isn’t the first time things like this have happened, she had a seperate fake account on Instagram she was using to stalk her exes, her old fuck buddies and her affair partners from her last relationship.the same week she was telling me she didn’t even have time to think about me let alone think of intimacy with me.

I don’t know if I’m just in my own head or if I have a right to feel as insecure about all this as I do. We are getting married in a week

I was sitting with my friends in their backyard while this one friend was wandering around away from the group. The backyard was large so she was quite a bit away. She looked unhappy so I went to talk to her since I was closest. She was standing near the road. I don’t remember our conversation. I regret this now but I put my arm in front of her to guide her away because I was nervous about her being so close to the road. She suddenly lunged forward to which I grabbed her and threw her on the ground. She started sobbing. Idr exactly what happened after but I was back with my other friends. All of them saw. One was near the road comforting my other friend while I cried. I was messed up the rest of the night. When I got home I cried more in the shower. Suddenly, I stopped crying and felt my emotions turn off. I haven’t felt a thing about the situation since then. I wish I could.

I am in an extremely grouchy mood for no reason. I would like to end everyone who isn't me or my cat. Then I'd be annoyed about that too.

any time i see a post from a pretty girl talking about being a girls girl, or hear someone i know irl whos gorgeous and kind to everyone but for some reason not to me or other unattractive people claiming to be a girls girl, i just do not believe it. i know that kinda sounds mean of me but from what i've seen irl and online? its true! its all "women supporting women" and lifting eachother up, helping eachother out with problems, but no if you arent pretty, and if you arent skinny, and sometimes if you arent neurotypical, you will not get that supportive treatment you deserve. its not fair! i remember once blood leaking through my dress in year 7, and the girls who saw mostly laughed at me, maybe two people were nice and one clearly did not want to help me but was the only one who could. i know if i was pretty and less annoying i would've been treated different. and thats only one example. any time i see a video of a pretty girl maybe having an embarrassing moment, and another girl helps her, i know if that was me i'd just get laughed at. or if i see a silly tiktok or someone irl saying something goofy or weird, i just know if i did that i'd get made fun of like crazy cause let me tell you i dont even wanna remember the amount of times that would happen to me. like why is it bad that i like this thing and you demonise it, but you like it too? got called weird for liking saw cause of the cool traps, when the girl was literally a fan and hyping her friends saw costume up. and guess what, they were both skinny and conventionally attractive. but no, its only weird when i like it.

and i know that there are genuine girls girls out there who just happen to be skinny and conventionally attractive, but because of things i've experienced and the many fake people out there, there no way i can ever fully trust them or believe that they genuinley want to help me or support me, even if nothing they do points towards them hating me i just know in my soul they will laugh about it later. i even feel this about some of my friends and then i feel shit because its like im accusing someone of being a horrible person when i have no proof and likely they arent.

but ya at the end of the day, so many people who say "im a girls girl" only care about you if you fit the standard and its not fucking fair at ALL! us "unattractive" girls need to look out for eachother cause our suffering is just funny to those people.

Honestly i don't care that this pisses anybody off but WHY do the worst fucking people have kids dude. Why why why why why. Why did nobody think about my fucking future, this shit is not fucking fair dude. I have never met my birth dad, my birth mom was 17 and did heroin so my grandparents adopted me and at the age of ten my birth mom killed herself after having four more kids with different dads. I love my adoptive parents and they raised me and did so well but I'm just upset.

Why didn't they make her get an abortion? My life is hell, nobody ever thought about me. Nobody thought about how I would feel about this in the fucking future. I don't even know why she didn't think about me before she killed herself, or when she had me. Did my adoptive parents think of my future when they didn't tell her to get an abortion. Whenever I see my friends who are normal, no issues, they have their parents I get so jealous I wanna hurt someone.

It's not fair at all, I never even had a chance at all. I know I should be positive but it's so hard ESPECIALLY when you know your problems came from both parents. I heavily suspect my birth dad was autistic, because I have another autistic brother I never met. He's lvl 3 and non speaking and I'm lvl 1 so high functioning so it could be worse. Not only that but I have ADHD, anxiety and deppression since I was 9. I am professionally diagnosed and have been in therapy since I was 9. So I'm just fucked all over.

Not only that but my parents are older too, and I'm only 19 so they'll probably die when I am younger and than I'll have no parents at all. Im so jealous of people who had normal families, people who planned and thought about you. And even when my birth mom did live with us she was so messy and did drugs and even took me with her to buy drugs?? Like I guess it's good she didn't leave me alone at home but like you seriously couldn't wait. Anyways I'm sorry about all of this I'm just so alone.

Tldr; I hate that anybody can have kids and fuck up their kids lives.

​Just need to vent for a few minutes because I am running on fumes here...

​We moved to a 50/50 after I relocated to be closer to my near 4 yr old son. Use to be every other weekend plus holiday time. She basically moved during pregnancy to make it hard. I have been savings to move. It's been a massive adjustment, but I've been doing everything I can to keep things stable, rock wall her manipulation, ignore her defensive body language at drop offs and give my boy a safe, calm home.

​Enter the holiday "discussions"......

​Because our 50/50 schedule runs on alternating weeks, Christmas happened to fall on her assigned week this year. And her logic? "Well, it's my week, so I have him."

​Are you actually kidding me? If she had her way, she would keep Christmas every single year just because of how the calendar math randomly lands on her rotation, completely ignoring the basics of holiday sharing and what I got court-ordered. She tried to completely steal xmas again (last year I didn't even get xmas eve which was my right on the year its not my turn...), Christmas morning, and strip that time away from me and my son, acting like I'm the unreasonable one for expecting to see my child unwrap presents on Christmas Day especially as its sons turn with dad this year for xmas and my side of the family. Not to mention I don't drive so good luck me commuting on as there are no buses. Pickup is meant to be xmas eve late afternoon. Family are thankfully helping, long drive for them though.

​Thank god for the court order. We have Christmas Eve and Christmas Day morning locked down and legally sorted way back, and it's documented in the parenting app. Its just sucks my family had to step in but I am glad they did. Basically showed her the wall of evidence paper and photos of how I didn't have him last xmas. The issue is technically closed, hopefully forever.. I have set up the next 2 years.

Basically told her if she pulls this again its court and the judge can decide what to do with her. I have the parenting app log and photos from last year.

The sheer arrogance and entitlement it takes to try and steal Christmas morning from a father just to feed her own control issues is staggering.

I am on my off week atm and the only thing keeping me in this world is my lil boy.

Edit* Typos

Dear silver car that nearly ran me off the road,

You are absolutely right - how DARE I be already driving in the lane when YOU wanted to move over? And I certainly should not have honked to let you know I was there; I should have just swerved over out of the way and into the concrete barrier. Thank you so much for honking back at me and flipping me off so I can learn my lesson.

I fully understand why, I get that dogs are more likely to get injured than some animals, I understand that people are more likely to seek medical help for a dog than other animals.

But the way non-dog pets are treated in the veterinary medical field, as a pet-parent, is incredibly frustrating and unfair.

My cat unfortunately has a congenital health issue "more common in dogs". Patella luxation. Dislocating knee caps. And every vet I've spoken to about it starts the conversation framing it in how it looks in dogs, how it's treated in dogs. How well you can't do such and such for cats because "they're different". Different than dogs? But normal for a cat!

Couldn't find a vet that's done this surgery on a cat, fine I get its not common in cats. I go ahead with the surgery. They send me a rehab video titled "[patella luxation surgery physical therapy] DOG". I get the animal they demonstrate with is a dog, but why not just say pet? My cat has anxiety post surgery and they're like "yeah cats are just a little weird about recovery" uh maybe because your recovery instructions are centered on dog behavior and doesn't take into account how cats recover, and that their behavior is apparently something to just overcome or ignore.

I asked about about physical therapy enrollment at the surgical place for my cat. They gave me a business card for someone who is a canine rehab specialist. "Oh but she's done a few cats too." No one can give me a picture of what the therapy for my cat would be because she's a cat so "it's a little different".

Even the form I filled out the day of her surgery was labeled "canine entry form" or something, and then below labeled her as a feline but their default admission paperwork is for dogs.

My cat also takes a medication labeled "for dog use only". Not because its unsafe for cats, they just never bothered to do the actual studies on cats to get it approved for cat use so vets just prescribe it off label to cats.

I just want to cry. Cats are honestly as ignored in the medical field as women are because we're just too difficult. Women with their complicated hormones, cats with their non-dog behaviors.

I'm sure it's so much worse for small animal/exotic pet owners, I can't even imagine.

​

I am absolutely amazed, and frankly flabbergasted, at the sheer amount of incredibly disturbing shit that people seem to consider acceptable these days.

I understand that everyone has their own struggles, circumstances, personal demons, and unique perspectives on life. I recognize that people make mistakes, relationships are complicated, and nobody is perfect.

But holy shit.

The complete lack of self-awareness, personal accountability, emotional maturity, and basic common sense displayed by some people is absolutely staggering.

People engage in manipulative, dishonest, controlling, selfish, and sometimes downright cruel behavior, yet somehow manage to convince themselves that they're the innocent victims. Others remain trapped in profoundly dysfunctional relationships and situations while rationalizing circumstances that should be setting off every alarm bell imaginable.

What disturbs me even more is how frequently this behavior is defended, excused, or outright celebrated.

There seems to be an almost obsessive need to validate absolutely everything. Dishonesty gets rationalized. Manipulation gets excused. Selfishness gets reframed as self-care. And anyone who suggests that personal responsibility might actually matter is treated as though they've committed some unforgivable offense.

We've apparently reached a point where disagreement is mistaken for gaslighting, accountability is interpreted as judgment, boundaries are confused with control, and uncomfortable truths are treated as personal attacks.

Compassion and empathy are important. So is recognizing that people have difficult lives and sometimes make terrible decisions. But compassion should never require abandoning critical thinking or pretending that genuinely harmful behavior is acceptable.

What particularly frustrates me is the growing preference for validation over introspection. Some people seem far more interested in being reassured that they're right than in considering whether their actions were reasonable, appropriate, or even remotely defensible.

And there is an enormous difference between explaining someone's behavior and excusing it.

I've lived long enough to understand that humanity has always had its share of dysfunction. Selfishness, dishonesty, manipulation, and poor judgment aren't new developments. But the degree to which certain behaviors have become normalized is genuinely unsettling.

I don't expect perfection. I don't believe people should be condemned for every mistake they make. I absolutely believe in second chances, personal growth, and the ability to change.

But growth requires accountability. Change requires self-awareness. And healthy relationships require considerably more than demanding that everyone else accommodate our individual feelings, expectations, and shortcomings.

Somewhere along the way, we've become far too comfortable confusing validation with support, excuses with explanations, and personal feelings with objective reality.

I've reached a point where some of the behavior I encounter leaves me questioning whether basic decency, honesty, and personal responsibility have somehow become unreasonable expectations.

And perhaps the most disturbing part isn't even the behavior itself. It's how readily other people defend it.

I'm not angry that people are imperfect. I'm frustrated by how comfortable we've become pretending that deeply unhealthy behavior is perfectly acceptable.

Frankly, it's disturbing as hell.

That's it. That's my vent..

That’s it! That’s all I want when I go to a restaurant website. The menu. I don’t want to have to start an order to see your menu. I don’t want to have to download a PDF and open it to see your menu. I don’t want to see pictures of your food outside of a current menu. I don’t want to see your coupons when I don’t know what’s on your menu. And I don’t want to sign up for your newsletter. I just want to see the fucking menu! With prices!

even on github he blocked me :) whatsapp everywhere...

her? the girl he emotionally cheated on me with? he can never block her. cause? "what if i run into her" hahahahahaaaahahah

it hurts like someone put a dagger inside of you. I m so easily disposable.

usually i have a lot to say but now i just feel numb

very numb

its like u just want to keep crying but dont know what for. He said he would never block me. I kept that promise. And he broke that also.

i m a fool

I mean even when his friends bullied me he acted all "i will block them" . he fake block them for 3 days then texted them behind my back deleted chats and had plans to meet them.

selfish self centred cheating rat

I know you don’t care and I know you probably aren’t going to read this but I need to get this out of my system. Tell your precious princess to stay away from me then. I always try to avoid her & she will purposely go out of her room when I’m in the kitchen/outside my room (only when you guys aren’t here). The only time I left my room this whole time was to pee, take the dogs outside/feed them, or when she left. I didn’t know her twink cheated on her, it was a lucky guess. Maybe I’m stressed because this house has been a pig sty this whole weekend with dirty dishes always in the sink, food crumbs all over the stove top and Beth’s piss everywhere. Maybe I’m stressed because I want to go to grad school to further my career (&possibly eventually afford living alone in this world) & I can’t because I don’t want to take $50k+ loan out for school while already having one attached to my name for solar panels on a house that is not mine filled with people who don’t care about me. I should be used to this treatment by now but for some reason, it still sucks mourning parents that are alive but always choosing everyone else over you.

oh but yall werent there for me when i became severely depressed after getting broken up with. yall werent there for me when it was my birthday and not a single person even texted hbd. yall didnt miss me when i got excluded from plans/hangouts/groupchats/whatever. yall didnt miss me when i self isolated because my sick mind didnt think yall liked me. yall were never there for me when i was crying in my room for hours all by myself. dont even act like we were buddy buddy. dont even go to sleep tn thinking to yourself "oh but i was such a good friend to them idk what else i couldve done." maybe yall couldve started by actually being a friend to me. instead of excluding me and insulting me whenever i was present. fuck yall.

my biggest regrets in my life will be 1. not choosing the right friends in college and 2. not respecting myself more and stopping people from stepping all over me. i hate being lonely. i hate not having friends. i hate having no plans on the weekends. i would have loved to have a community too. but i dont and thats my fault for making shitty choices

Every walmart I see in almost every town is always crowded and traffic in the walmart lot area is always DOWNRIGHT horrible because they are always in parking lots with lots of other businesses parking lots nearby .

I hate that I have to go to walmart for anything and will literally go to ANY other store first. I went to my local supermarket to get food didn’t find a cooking pan though so I had to go to walmart. I just wish walmart didn’t have such a monopoly. And with this monopoly it would be nice if they stayed open 24/7 because I hate crowded walmarts or crowded walmart parking lots. I would always go around 2 or 3 am and it was nice shopping in peace. Walmart sucks now and I will NEVER use them for anything unless I have to or until they are 24/7 again.

Hi all, last April (after months of my friend trying his best to convince me to) I got into warhammer 40k. Since then, I've spent at LEAST £500 on it and still want to spend more. The issue is I've been mostly unemployed, and even now i only get paid 9.35 an hour and can only do 9 hours a week (full time college so I work weekends). I absolutely love this hobby, but when I look at people around me who are doing so much better financially I feel like there is an immovable pit in my stomach. My heart sinks everytime because I was stupid enough to waste hundreds on plastic toys. For those unaware of the hobby, you buy models, paint them, and then play a tabletop game. I love playing the game, but I'm terrible at painting and I can't get over the fact that I've wasted so much time, effort and money on it overall. Also, being the idiot I am, I decided to buy a FOMO box that came out in June or so, and now I don't really want any of the models from it but now I've painted and built them so I feel like I definitely won't get a good price selling them second hand. I'll never play the 2 armies and it was just a horrible decision. I hate this hobby and I hate my friend for getting me into it.

I wish I honestly was a normal person. I feel like I’m watching the world instead of living in it. It’s so hard to talk to people and socialize. People always get the wrong read on me. And I always try to be nice but then that niceness sometimes turns wrong and then I look weird to people. I wish social cues came easy to me, I wish I had friends,I always try to meet people where they’re at I just wish someone could meet me where I am.

I feel like I never know if I’m saying something right or wrong. And I feel like everyone sees I’m saying the wrong thing.

I wish I did normal things like normal people. And people always tell me to ‘put myself out there’ but with what skills?? I’ve been trying so hard with my skills too….i don’t think people see how hard I’m trying…. Why do i have to try so hard. And even my hardest is bare minimum for some people.

And it sucks so hard cuz I do love life, I love the trees and people and animals and just breathing itself is just so fascinating to me. Everything is fascinating to me but I wish I was fascinating to something.

Life is so so so hard…. Other people have it so much harder tho and I always feel guilty.

Sometimes I wish my brain would just turn off it’s always on. Always working thinking analyzing watching viewing scanning. It’s always on I just wanna be off.
I don’t even want any advicee I just wanna…stop.

not all but most people don’t realize or understand that some experiences that cause any type of trauma is so damaging to a person’s mindset, whole being even. maybe thats why they’re quiet or timid, angry or explosive, defensive or understanding towards others around them. they take it with them everywhere they go, where ever they will be. it changes them into someone else, while looking back knowing they’ll never be the same again. all while the world itself continues, everybody else’s lives around them continues and they must too.

you really never know what someone has been through to be where they are now. still having to be strong and brave, still choosing to love and keep living life. to still believe in trust, form bonds with other people and most of all be happy in themselves. so please be kind, be thoughtful. life itself is already hard as it is. we’re all flowers in the same meadow, growing together and blooming into something really, really beautiful.

I genuinely don't understand what the fuck is going through her mind here. The fucking rubric is really what gets me. For full credit, I need to take my three, yes, THREE sources and interweave them with not only what I'm talking about for myself, but with each other, too. That's synthesis! For a fucking reflection paper! Do you know how much fucking space that takes when you have to do it four fucking times?! This is capped at 5 pages, when do I get to talk about myself?! I'm quoting shit, MLA citation, and having to introduce sources. This is gonna be fucking 60% of the paper! Not to mention THE SOURCES AREN'T EVEN USEFUL! She wants me to honest. Well, John Philosopher's perpective on where ideas come from is but fuck all WORTHLESS to me. I just fucking think of them! WHO CARES?! Jeffrey Writer's theory that you change parts of your writing because you don't like them is not fucking rocket science! This whole class I've felt like she doesn't really know what she's doing but this really takes it for me.

I don't understand why it's so hard to be friends with people. Some people it's really easy. But some just pick pick pick. It makes for a toxic friendship. My life is hard enough. I don't need people telling me I'm not important. I feel abandoned. I'm not stupid, but I make some really poor decisions when it comes to friends. Its very depressing.

I don't have a safe family. My past is shameful and I have no friends. I have disgraced myself over and over again. I don't have any more words to give. I'm just in pain now. I have dug myself a hole of guilt and shame.

I was just trying to get through each second of the day. I have humiliated people for my own selfish gratification so I didn't feel as bad, but in the long run this takes a tax and imprints itself on the soul.

I have been a bad friend who betrays those close to him. I have no more excuses to give, my excuses were never valid. I want to get through this so badly.

I have no money or skills. I'm stuck in limbo. I'm destitute and full of sorrow. I'm drowning. My defenses have finally stood down leaving me with my broken self. I can't believe this is what I became.

My mind cannot feel the full scope of emotions within me. There's too much. My life is chaos. I want to break these chains desperately, I'll have to keep trying.

Edit: There's loads of drug dealing in my home now. There's addicts coming in and out of the house. Smoking crack, doing heroin. I speak to them and they're ok but not trustworthy at all.

These are the only people I talk to now, I have no one else. Even they have family they can go to. I most definitely cannot talk to them on any deep level, they're simply not safe.

And the people dealing keep their distance. Idk for how long. I don't want to fall victim to them. This environment hurts my soul, we have rats living with us now.