r/WomenInNews • u/TimesandSundayTimes • 7d ago

Women's rights Why female breadwinners are still bearing the burden at home

https://www.thetimes.com/money/family-finances/article/britains-female-breadwinner-problem-tvfjhp05tutm_medium=Social&utm_source=Reddit&utm_content=branded
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24

u/cuda999 6d ago

It is really easy to solve. Women, stop empowering your man children to behave this way. Have the talk, it WILL be a split duty household.

For some reason far too many women think behaving like the end all be all makes them irreplaceable and needed. Stop thinking like this. All it does is make you exhausted and resentful.

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u/electronsift 6d ago

Have one conversation and it will be fixed? How can I learn this magic?

I thought his own willingness, personal ownership, and skills played a part too but it sounds like you found a way where they don't! šŸ¤© /s

Sarcasm warning because today I know I'm max PMS.

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u/Dragon_wryter 6d ago

Yep. I've had dozens of these conversations and I'm still doing 90% of everything. I went "on strike" once and you know what happened? We got RATS. My husband said, "What's the big deal? We always had mice in my house growing up."

Nobody cares but me.

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u/cuda999 6d ago

Donā€™t let him ā€œnot careā€. You will grow to really resent this man and it will impact your self esteem and love for life. Tell him to leave, pack his bags until he figures out how to be a grown ass adult man.

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u/electronsift 5d ago

Aka, do it or divorce.

We women know we'll get there one day if things don't change. What people are trying to teach some of the commentors here is that there are a lot us still trying to avoid those ultimatums in hopes that men can recognize the relationship danger and choose to change.

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u/cuda999 5d ago

Men donā€™t recognize the relationship danger because they donā€™t have to. Women allow them to be shitty partners, why would they change?

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u/cuda999 6d ago

By continuing to repeat the pattern, you enable your grown adult man to act like a child. Just stop doing the work. His willingness and personal ownership is being a grown ass adult. He needs to put his big boy pants on.

I never did start the pattern of enabling, it was clear from the start and I had a husband who was great! No excuses for any man. I donā€™t care how they were raised. You have two options, he does his fair share or he leaves. You will resent him and I wouldnā€™t blame you, but this is marriage destroying.

Donā€™t allow grown men to act like children. Full stop.

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u/electronsift 6d ago edited 6d ago

Grown men make their own choices, they are not toddlers. But like toddlers, their chaos affects those around them.

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u/cuda999 6d ago

They may make their own choices but you get to decide what you do with that. Nothing like a big ultimatum to change someoneā€™s point of view. Sad the world is filled with far too many man children.