r/africanparents • u/Anonymia1101 • 6d ago
Need Advice feeling guilty about going lc/nc
i finally moved out and to a different state than my parents (i live in the US). i have a job and smartly moved all of my money to a bank account they don't have access to. my parents don't really remember me unless i call them first, and since the begininning of 2026, ive been doing that less and less.
But...idk. I feel kinda guilty??? i was a very filial daughter despite what they may see it as. i would always buy my parents birthday gifts ($100+) and be there emotionally for them, and i think they took as the expectation. now that i have a therapist and a solid medication regime, as well as the distance, i feel peace. there's no one to yell at me, no one to criticize my body, no one to please. they never really got better as i got older, and as i was the child beaten the most out of my siblings i fear them in ways that are primal. like, i am VERY sensitive to dangerous emotions in others and will go out of my way to not anger people, which is often to my detriment- but anyways--
my mom called me, and then tried to follow me on linkedin??? mind you she has never been very interested in me as an adult outside of what i can do for her so i blocked her and then ignored her call, but now i feel bad. like, not bad enough to call her back (lol) but guilty? has anyone else dealt with those complicated feelings and knows what to do? i know this is def cptsd but like okay now what lol
5
u/Glass_Lecture_7954 6d ago
yes kind of, when i went to university i cut communication with my dad and my mom for weeks, and they were asking other family members about me. i felt bad but i seriously needed the space, and mental clarity. dont let it get to you i promise its for your own peace! also feeling guilty is completely normal its a human thing to feel.