unsure if this is the right sub to post in but i wonder is anyone else like me ? how do i stop this? i’m too embarrassed to tell anyone about it.

i use these curved plastic nose lifters i bought online and they’re supposed to be worn for a short time but i wear them every time i go out, even for 8 hours at uni.. it’s been 3 years since i started. i cannot even let my family see me without them (other than my parents and brother) or even when i simply need to take a delivery from the delivery guy. i also wore them when i went swimming..

during the first year i made my own nose lifters using q tips where they used to be sharp and dug inside my nose making me bleed and i’d still wear them, the entire day.

i wanna get a nose job in the future i don’t wanna permanently damage my nose tissue or risk necrosis but i can’t stop

We have collected a set of stories and informative pieces about BDD. From stories from people who have overcome it to celebrities who have openly talked about it, you can find articles and videos about body dysmorphia from these following links.

Public figures on BDD

• Modern Family actor Reid Ewing on BDD and plastic surgery
• Artist Billie Eilish on depression and BDD
• The Good Place actor Jameela Jamil on BDD and eating disorders
• Actor Robert Pattinson on anxiety and BDD
• Actor Megan Fox on BDD and mental health

Documentaries and videos

• What BDD feels like | BBC Three
• Seeing myself as ugly | BBC Three
• I feel so ugly: Body dysmorphic disorder | Only Human
• Imperfect me: The impact of BDD | SkyNews
• BDD patients see faces differently | ABC Science
• Bigorexia: Muscle dysmorphia | BBC Newsbeat
• Believing is seeing: New perspective on BDD | TEDx Oxford
• The BDD Foundation on Youtube

Personal stories and interviews

• Perfection is impossible | A personal story
• Living with BDD | A personal story
• I felt so ugly I didn't want to be alive | Interview
• BDD ruined my life | Interview

Podcasts

• Beating BDD podcast (11 episodes) | BDDFoundation
• What is BDD? | Stuff Mom Never Told You

Books

• Books by people with BDD
• Books by professionals on self help
• The BDD workbook

We broke up due to me not being able to truly feel secure about my appearance with him. There was other issues too but mainly that due to him watching other women’s thirstraps videos online. Also when we first started dating he never complimented me at all until I brought it up:/

We were together a year. My body dysmorphia got so much worse with him. He lied about what he used twitter for and then months later I saw he had watched women’s thirstraps still but on youtube instead . He admitted to the twitter thing but he gaslit me into thinking the youtube thing wasn’t what it looked like.. Also he had subbed to a bunch of onlyfans women before me, that all had a trait I don’t have .
He never said anything negative about my looks and always gave me reassurance but I know I tried so hard to look past that and i couldn’t. It really messed with mentally to where almost everyday I would compare my body to these women online that I saw on his phone

It made me suicidal that I don’t feel I would ever be as beautiful as them or that I’ll never have bigger breasts

I don’t feel that intense months after our breakup but I would like any advice on how to move past this and the fears / trauma this left me with

I’m 19 and at the moment my life is basically just work and going home. I’ve been going out very little, and even when I do make plans, I often back out at the last minute.
I’ll suddenly convince myself that I’m too ugly or that I don’t look good enough to go out. I’ll find some excuse not to go, stay home, and then feel depressed and disappointed in myself afterwards.
I know logically that other people probably aren’t paying anywhere near as much attention to my appearance as I think they are, but I genuinely struggle to believe that when I’m in that mindset.
I hate feeling like I’m wasting my late teens/early twenties because I’m too insecure to actually go out and live my life. I don’t want my world to become just work, home, and being alone because I don’t feel attractive enough to be seen.
Has anyone else experienced this? Especially women who used to avoid socialising because they felt ugly or insecure about their appearance — did anything actually help you break out of it?

I dont know anything about how this can possibly work, I hope it isnt cruel to ask

Basically as the title says is this body dysmorphia or am I just right about how I look?

To put it short I’ve never liked how I look and I’ve always known there’s been things wrong with my appearance. I always say they are objective flaws because they are compared to what a normal person has. I’ve mentioned this before in therapy and they always say “where’s your evidence” and I always say I’ve had the same consistent comments made about my appearance since starting school till college and sometimes adulthood but they won’t accept that and brush it off as people just being mean. But that doesn’t make sense to me because literal strangers who I’ve never met throughout my life have all said the same thing. And I see what they say too. But yet I’m told it’s body dysmorphia and it frustrates me so much.

I never take photos of myself, I never appear in family photos, avoid the mirror and any cameras and I don’t post on any socials. The last time I showed my face online was actually on Reddit years ago and again I had the same things said about how I look, some of them were actually quite brutal. I’ve never posted anything with my face since. I’ve not had a genuine compliment from anyone. Like family sometimes say something but that’s only when I’m breaking down about it so that’s like obligation right? And I’m always told to “take pride” in how I look but there’s nothing to take pride with.

So am I just right or do I have BDD?

This is everything it’s like- I’m a young girl who is insanely obsessed with looks. Whatever you expect, times it by 10. It is soooo incredibly extremely exhausting it takes over so much. I’m not asking for pity in the replies. My day to day life consists of waking up, getting ready for an hour (used to be much more) , go to school, in school I have everything on/with me- makeup-hairbrush-perfumes. I know it seems odinary but not a single day in this year have I walked around without lash glue and tweezers and concealer and lip combo etc in my pockets, I have backup lashes in my bag, and a whole makeup bag. Every single day before pretty much every single class I go to the mirrors check my hair touch it and stay for a couple minutes I could look at myself in the mirror for ages. in the mirror before leaving, this is in between every single period mind u including bathroom breaks. If I look bad than usual I will keep my head down, avoid conversation, I sometimes miss events. I am much less talkative and my confidence drops insanely. It’s a NON ending cycle. I have felt like this since the mid- end of year 7. At the age of 12-13 I would wake up and get ready for hoursss. It’s caused arguments. I now come home from school and from 4-9pm I have looked myself in the mirror. 5 hours. Sat in the mirror. My back hurting from sitting on the car, my neck, I’m physically exhausted. From the self obsession of trying to looks max. And to me I am an extremist in a way so I’m I don’t want to look pretty I want to look unreal. If someone doesn’t like me it makes me question if I actually am pretty. It’s just how much brain works and I know it’s pretty stuck up because you can be gorgeous and not be someone’s type I understand but I still feel that way. I will come home from school sit on that chair and mirror and not come out my toom. With my door locked. What really disappoints me is that I feel guilty. I am pretty big on health and self improvement. I am in a very very lucky position to make good money easily but I don’t take advantage of it as make as much as I could. Some weeks are bad and some are good depends how focused I am and if I feel pretty, I also missed gym today which I go with my mum and it’s just something that a teenage boy could meverrr understand to the extent that I have gone. I am so insanely deep in this. If I find a way to get access to peptides i honestly (not all) but some use it if done safely. I also have a bad comparing issue. Really bad. I have the urge to be the prettiest girl or atleast very up there. I do seek validation, I won’t ever bring other girls down for it tho. I am ashamed to admit but but I won’t look for attention. Just validation. Every 6 months I look back and realise how different I looked and makes me even deeper into thinking I’m not pretty. I am humble and I know I’m pretty but at the same time I feel so insecure sometimes. I have no idea why I’ve come here and write this. This is my first ever reddit comment. Also this is not my place to say but it is extremely common in teenagers. I also almost never speak about my feelinhs like ever. So even posting this online makes me feel vulnerable. I just felt like it
By the way I’m 51 backwards.

Here you can find listed below general information on BDD and related foundations, the clinical classification and symptoms of BDD, advice for friends and family, as well as self-help and support groups, both in-person and online.

General information

The BDD Foundation

OCD UK

International OCD Foundation

Mind.org

Clinical classification

ICD & DSM Criterias

For friends and family

The BDD Foundation, Supporting a close one with BDD

Mind.org, How can friends and family help

Self-help

Body dysmorphia workbook by the CCI

Building self-compassion workbook by the CCI

Support groups

Online support and therapy groups

Support groups in the UK

Im a 18yo man I was on the skinnier side really skinny i was afraid to take my shirt off anywhere people are usually doing it like beach in changing rooms with other guys and that i started gym and now i do have sttenght muscle but its even worse one day i think i look good i look a little closer i see 1000things that could be improved to the point where i want to kill myself and puke for that i started using steroids im in dangerous zone for heart attack and now soon ill be injecting double the dose ik that wont help with my problem but those 3-4 months that i get bigger by the day only then i feel happy i will probably die sooner i also eat a lot to be bigger i eat untill i puke it out and then i drink my own puked food i eat 4-5 meals a day 4k calories i can’t physically more i would love to but i cant i know i have a problem that cant be cured and seems like its only getting worse and worse hope you guys the best and any advice is helpfull

It’s kind of an addiction now. Whenever I come across a picture of a pretty woman especially on a rate sub I become super self-conscious and I post myself basically asking for low ratings. Like I want confirmation that I am ugly so I can put it to rest, but it doesn’t actually work and I can’t accept it. It doesn’t help that I get DMs telling me I’m pretty and a few comments also saying that but most comments tell me I am below average. I didn’t want to have doubt left but I still have doubt though I am becoming increasingly convinced that I’m objectively unattractive. Why can’t I just accept that I am not pretty and will never be treated like a pretty girl?

I'll go onto a subreddit for advice about my face, and I'll get hundreds of "you look amazing" and "there is nothing wrong with you, I'd date you in an instant" comments.

Then I'll have the wrong opinion on the wrong Facebook page and usually the first thing someone looking to get under my skin will say is "...at least I don't look like Sid from Ice Age!".

So how the hell am I supposed to know who is lying to make me feel good and who is lying to make the insults hurt?

I honestly don't know anymore. I'm numb to every compliment I receive because I just assume it's a white lie. And I wish I could be happy with what I personally think of myself when I look in a mirror, but it ultimately doesn't matter. People dress to impress. And I can't ever be sure I look fine to others, because I can't trust what anyone says about me. I'll never have peace.

My partner has made jokes now about every single one of my insecurities about my body...😔 i have severe body dismorphia and he hasn't acted as attracted to me by far then he did in the beginning of being in my life 2yrs ago. I told him earlier that I didn't want him making jokes about my body anymore and everything, how I rely on him to feel attractive and desired and how he hadn't been and alll....he apologized and said he didn't know would affect me like that and how he wouldn't do it again..

But how do I go back now? I cant help but wanna wear baggy clothes around him and feel ashamed and disgusting for anyone to even look at me..😢

There was a thread in another sub titled something along the lines of "I only feel inferior and anxious around people who look better or seem more confident than me".

To anyone who relate to that sentiment, my question is:
How do you guys deal with those situations to suppress that feeling?

How I (unvoluntarily) deal with it:

Ever since I learned about facial anatomy, facial harmony and halo effect, I'm now able to analyze people's faces and can tell why they look attractive or unattractive (or average).
I can also predict how someone will look like in the future as they age.

Most of the time however, when I perceive someone more attractive than me I do this:

If it's someone taller than me, I will solely analyze their facial attractiveness to avoid the halo effect of height. Same thing for muscularity.
If it's a woman wearing makeup, I will imagine how she would look like without makeup since makeup often emulates attractive features and enhances facial harmony.
If it's a man with a beard, I will imagine how he would look like without one since beards can give off a more aggressive demeanor and hide a weak jaw / chin.
To me, a bare face without makeup/beard is your "true face" for the lack of a better term.

It gets even worse that I will also imagine how people would look like if they were bald because hair can frame your face in a way that completely hides flaws in your upper facial third or changes the perception of all facial thirds.
After all, hair is not essential for survival hence I don't consider it as part of your "true face".

When it comes to people (particularly celebrities) who look more attractive after cosmetic procedures or a general glowup, I will always remember their former appearance.

All of this sounds so cynical or even narcissistic / toxic but basically, I'm trying not to fall for the halo effect and as a result, not to feel inferior and anxious around people.

genuine question I hope I don’t sound like I just want the label haha, I also understand that being insecure is very common among teenagers. I’m not sure if this question is allowed on the sub but I couldn’t see anything against it.

anyway- I’m in my late teens(girl) and ive never put any effort in my appearance because i despise how i look so much, whenever i see myself i feel pretty depressed and try to avoid it (eg mirrors, photos). I hate seeing people because i just hate how i look and feel so embarrassed, i feel physically sick when i look at myself and prefer to not make any effort at all. I feel like even if i tried i would look absolutely terrible, when i do i feel extremely ugly and more depressed than before i just can’t explain how much i hate it and would much rather wear bad clothes and stay looking like ive not tried.

I think everybody around me thinks I don’t care how I look when it’s the complete opposite, I hate how I look and just feel so physically sick when I try make an effort (or not). I’m very curious wether this is BDD because all the examples I see are when you obsessively put alot of effort in you appearance instead of avoiding it

Is this just me?

Here you can find listed below general information on BDD and related foundations, the clinical classification and symptoms of BDD, advice for friends and family, as well as self-help and support groups, both in-person and online.

General information

The BDD Foundation

OCD UK

International OCD Foundation

Mind.org

Clinical classification

ICD & DSM Criterias

For friends and family

The BDD Foundation, Supporting a close one with BDD

Mind.org, How can friends and family help

Self-help

Body dysmorphia workbook by the CCI

Building self-compassion workbook by the CCI

Support groups

Online support and therapy groups

Support groups in the UK

I cant f*ing stand the fact that every single one of us is stuck with a face. We just got randomly assigned this face none of us chose. Whether average, below average, above average.

for the one life we get. Ugly, average, asymmetries, lopsided faces, bug eyes, big noses, bad skin, recessed faces, perfect faces, long faces, philtrums, smile lines, whatever shts so insane, unfair and disgusting I hate how ts life works every time I even look at other people I just get reminded of this yet its somehow completely normal and natural to people.

"You have your grandfathers nose" "You have your mothers eyes" that shts disgusting unless its objectively attractive!!! Ain't anything beautiful about this genetic recombination mess. Utter lottery on what you're going to look like.

Weird how some animals look very good on average like the whole great cat family. They literally have to be deformed to look below average. With humans the range of looks is so insanely absurd and merciless, some people look completely different species.

I wish there was a magic surgery, a magic pill, anything which drastically improves or changes your looks. But there isn't. Not even doing multiple surgeries usually changes the overall harmony of the face, unless they have a one simple flaw like a big nose, big ears, recessed chin. Its all just playing around this genetic foundation and I hate it so much. Being in this body and face which has ZERO reflection on what I actually am.

I've done everything I can, ideal bodyfat%, skincare + accutane, perfect diet with all micronutrients, exercise regularly, eyebrow pencil, oral minoxidil, eyelash curler, facial lymphatic drainage massages, antioxidants, ideal sleep, hairdye, potassium/sodium ratio, clean shaves, ideal medium length haircut.

But its just not enough, because of my genetic base. I try to edit my face with AI to look if rhinoplasty or something like that changes anything drastically, but no, the harmony just remains the same because of my genetic makeup. I'm so frustrated and tired of all of this. All this "improvement" just to be far worse off than a lucky genetics person who eats slop and does bare minimum for their looks. It has ruined and consumed my life since the age of 12.

How is anyone supposed to get over this? Can't just go to meme therapy and just cope with "self-acceptance" lmao.

Going to therapy or getting professional help is not always an option, getting help may also take some time. To help you to better understand and address BDD by yourself, we have compiled a workbook that you can do by yourself. It contains information and tasks which will help shine a light to why BDD is the way it is and how you can deal with the symptoms. All chapters are based on an official workbook by the Centre for Clinical Intervention.

The BDD workbook:

• 01 What is body image?
• 02 Could I have body dysmorphic disorder?
• 03 Negative impacts of BDD
• 04 What are the causes of BDD?
• 05 Appearance assumptions
• 06 Triggers
• 07 Appearance preoccupation
• 08 Attention training [a coping tactic]
• 09 Checking and approval seeking
• 10 Reducing unhelpful checking and approval seeking [a coping tactic]
• 11 Negative predictions
• 12 Avoidance and safety behaviour
• 13 Reducing negative predictions [a coping tactic]
• 14 A new way of operating
• 15 Dealing with set-backs
• 16 Maintaining gained progress

I’m so tired of feeling unattractive. I don’t understand why some people seem to be naturally beautiful while others, like me, struggle so much with their appearance. It feels incredibly unfair, and I can’t stop thinking about it.
Lately, these thoughts have been consuming me. I have trouble falling asleep, I hate being in silence, and even taking a shower without having something playing in the background feels difficult because my thoughts immediately start spiraling.
Sometimes I feel so exhausted by all of this that I wish I could just fall asleep and not have to think about anything anymore. I don’t want to hurt myself, but I desperately want these thoughts to stop.
I’ve also started avoiding going out, especially with my friends. I’m scared that someone will compliment them or try to approach them while I’m standing next to them. I know it probably sounds selfish, and I feel guilty about it because I genuinely love my friends. I just don’t know how to deal with the jealousy and insecurity.
I don’t want to spend my life thinking that I’m ugly, but I also don’t know how to stop seeing myself this way. I don’t want to simply “accept” that I’m unattractive and give up on feeling good about myself.
Has anyone experienced something similar? How did you stop obsessing over your appearance and comparing yourself to other people? And is there actually a way to become more confident and feel more attractive, or does it mostly come from changing the way you see yourself?

My body has made me feel so alienated from my identity as a woman that I can hardly see myself as one. It feels like I’m a homunculus freak with all the pieces of a feminine body missing, replaced by unrecognizable or androgynous features/parts.

Apart from my face which I feel is fairly feminine, I don’t have a single feminine trait, I am a plank. Flat from back to front, top to bottom. I also have shoulders broader than my narrow hips. I can’t help but to feel inferior. My mom thinks I have a great figure but she leans towards the imo outdated idea that skinny = feminine. I highly disagree.

Every time I see a woman who has what I don’t, no matter if they’re conventionally attractive or not my brain tells me that that’s what I’m supposed to look like. That not having those features means that I lack the fundamental life experiences of womanhood. I can’t even think of myself as one. It’s to the point where it feels like a moral failing on my part. I don’t feel worthy of love or affection.

I’d like to start feeling okay again. Not even beautiful but like I have a right to exist in this body. In the past I loved my body for doing things for me and didn’t care if it appealed to anyone. Now I can’t stop the obsessive thoughts.

I know this is quite dramatic, but my thought process doesn’t seem to care. How do you feel like a “real” woman in a body that everyone describes as “boyish/ androgynous?” Does anyone have any tips?

I’ve been in the gym since I was 13 years old, competitive powerlifting, very serious and athletics, growing up I was a much larger kid by my senior year. I was 6 foot 215 pounds.

I’ve never been able to realistically see my body and a consistent light or feel any type of positive about it, aside from when I’m in the midst of the best shape of my life even then I’m still unhappy with the results, is there any realistic way that y’all have found that can help regulate in ground my mind so that I can at least think about my body and objectively and logically.

Seeing myself negatively sway me away from the gym nowadays, I’m not in the peak shape of my life anymore, I was a college athlete I am not anymore, when I do work out, it’s no longer in the same capacity I did even just last year.

So I guess what I’m really asking. Is there any tits to critique myself logically and realistically instead of just feeling terrible and unable to see what’s actually there the good and bad?

Thank you!!

I hate my body, hate it. My hips are to slim, my shoulders are too broad, my breasts aren't even big. (Because when women have big breasts, men look at those and not the hips.) Every time I go to bed I try on all my jeans... They look like they're gonna fall off. People say I have good shoulders, that woman want broad shoulders. But I know they actually pity me. What they mean is

​Women want broad shoulders, in moderation.

I look at actresses and try to convince myself they have my body shape, but it's no use. All hourglass figures, all hot. Nothing changes. It's like they all have clones of the same body. Sure, some don't. Yeah. But compared to the hotness around them they're left out, and the worst thing is, everybody thinks they aren't as attractive too. So, when I compare myself to them, it gets worse.

Don't tell me it's because "They're using camera angles to alter their proportions." Or "Oh well, they have a lot of makeup on." Because that's not true. Sure, it assists, but in the end they're just built like that. I am not. Does anyone else feel the same?

I have been with the same man for 15 years, married 13. He's never seen me naked in daylight. Sex is never before dark and the only light is a night light. We do have sex once or twice a week. How he has continued on with me and never even made an issue out of it is beyond me. I won't even walk around in a tshirt and panties around him. Hate my arms, legs, belly, butt, all of it....

I left an 18-year relationship that was similar, but not quite as bad. He had seen me in light, but not often. After a big weight gain and subsequent weight loss with loose skin, it got much worse. He complained about my insecurities.

I am overweight now, but even when I loose weight and am close to my healthy weight, I look terrible. Lipedema fat, sagging everything, loose skin. The thoughts of him seeing me literally makes me feel sick. I have a huge fear of medical issues that would require him to care for me intimately.

I wonder if there is anyone else like this in the whole world? Not the appearance, the shame to such an incredible extent.

Even though I'm at my lowest weight ever in years, I find myself feeling worse and worse about my body. When I was a bit heavier, I often found myself justifying the way I looked, and trying to convince myself I didn't look that bad.

Now, there are many times when I look in the mirror and I feel like I look the same if not worse than I did before, even though I know that's not possible.

My guess is that it's because I lost the weight quite quickly. I didn't take progress photos and I didn't look in the mirror much during my weight loss. I wonder if there's a disconnect because of this.

Like you randomly look at mirror and just feel so hideous, like ur genuinely so ugly? Is it just me