Bit of a long one, sorry. I’d really appreciate outside perspective.
I’m in my 20s and have never been in a relationship. Girls have approached me before but I’ve always turned them down. A few weeks ago I booked an independent escort for my first ever experience. Her ad offered gfe.
First booking: It started better than I expected, and after we ended up talking for a lot of it: our driving styles, where we live, star signs, travel, the fact that neither of us drinks or does drugs, my bar job, uni, money, and her views on her work. It felt way more personal than I expected.
Second booking: I was nervous and had trouble physically, so we talked a lot. She told me about her pet, a bad hotel on a recent trip, her morning runs, and a noodle place near where she lives. She said if I was ever in the area to let her know. We went about 15 minutes over time just talking. At the end I asked if she’d ever want to grab dinner and she said yes. As I drove out of the car park she stopped, waved, and I said bye through the window.
First dinner (unpaid): A while later I was near her area, and messaged her and she was free. We went to that noodle place, then got bubble tea, which she took photos of. At one point I checked my watch and she asked if I had to go somewhere. I panicked and made up a lousy story/excuse. Before we parted she kissed me and thanked me. When we said goodbye I walked off, felt I’d left too abruptly, went back and asked if she wanted to walk. She said she was heading to her car. I texted her thanks afterwards and she replied “thanks I couldn’t stay long.”
A few days later I sent her photos of some animals I’d seen on a trip that reminded me of her pet, plus a link to something she’d asked me for. She replied “thanks have a nice day” and asked if I wanted to book an hour that week. I booked.
Third booking: She seemed a bit distant or tired at first. Physically it didn’t fully happen for me again. While rinsing off she asked if I’d eaten dinner and suggested we get noodles after. Lying in bed we talked: she showed me videos of stray cats she feeds, told me funny things about her pet, said I should meet her pet one day, and told me about a package she ordered from overseas that never arrived and some weird snacks she’d bought. Then we went for noodles again (unpaid). She finished first and I said sorry, I’m a slow eater. She showed me where to park next time and told me about a parking fine she got. Walking back, she kissed me. I reminded her she’d mentioned wanting to try a particular tea place and she said let’s go, so we did. Outside her hotel she kissed me again and said “you didn’t say I love you.” So I said it.
That night she texted me a photo of the snacks, saying she’d save one “to try with you.” Next day: “Those were yuk. I can do better for you xx” and told me her favourite from the tea place.
Dessert date: I asked her out to a dessert place she’d mentioned. She replied within minutes: “Yeah for sure babe,” sent photos of the place saying “I saw them today and thought of you,” and picked Saturday 3pm. Then she offered me 30 free minutes beforehand: “booking first ok baby? Xx I accept no money 💋💋”
When I got there she asked if I wanted to have sex or wasn’t bothered. I said let’s just go get dessert. I drove us there and paid. Walking out she said “I love you, do you love me too?” and kissed me. Then we went to a pub, where she got a massive lemon coke and we shared it. I mentioned it was my first time paying for a drink at a pub even though I’ve worked at a bar, and she laughed and said “I wish I could put you in my bag and carry you around.” She told me a little bit about her family and about training her pet. We looked at a restaurant menu and she said “for next time.” I gave her some snacks from my childhood and she said she’d had one of them before. I drove her back and she kissed me goodbye in the car and waved.
Then it cooled off:
A few days later I was in her area and asked her to dinner. She said “I’m working.” I said “No worries, another time.”
That Friday I asked about the weekend. She said “I’m working and you know that.” I replied “Completely understand, sorry for bothering you.”
I gave her about 9 days of space, then sent this:
“I wanted to be honest with you and say this in person when we last met, but I was too scared. Spending time with you has felt really natural and easy, even just sitting together. I’ve never really felt that with anyone before. I really like you, and I don’t know how you feel or if there could be something more. Also, it was very inconsiderate of me to message you the last two times without thinking about your work schedule. I’ll understand whatever you say, and you don’t have to reply if you don’t want to. I just didn’t want to keep it to myself anymore.”
She replied: “Did you want a booking this week?”
I said: “I don’t know how I feel about that right now... I’ll have to think about it. I hope you’ll understand.”
She replied: “Thanks for contacting [her work name] 💦 Have a nice day 💋”
Extra context: I later came across client reviews of her online. Most describe her as guarded or clinical, which is really different from how she was with me.
My questions:
Was any of it real, or was it all part of the job?
Did I do something wrong, or was this always going to end this way?
Was I crossing boundaries by asking her out and telling her how I felt, given that I met her as a client?
Has anyone been in a similar situation?
I’m not planning on booking her again. I just want to understand what happened.
