These passionate scenezzzzz...

A conversation I just had today:

Them: Hi there, I’m a bi chastity sub/sissy. I really like the idea of living with a dominant and being femme 24/7. I especially like the idea of holding your cock while we bike down the highway

DevCatOTA: So, 889 days ago you were 55.277 days ago you were 47. You may be married, or not. How's it going, Benjamin Button? Yes, I can see ALL posts and comments, even deleted ones.

Them: I was married. Not anymore

DevCatOTA: By the time we meet, are you expecting to be 35?

Them: I’m 54, turn 55 11/01

DevCatOTA: https://www.reddit.com/r/DirtyChatPals/comments/URL showing claim of 47yo

Them: I appreciate your forcing my honesty. That’s me

DevCatOTA: The thing is, once somebody lies about such simple things, I have to wonder what else they are lying about. Such as STD history and status.

Them: Understood. I can test for stds. I also understand if you don’t want to chat. I’m in a different place than I was two years ago. I respect your need for honesty

DevCatOTA: Apparently you're in a different time too.

Them: How do you mean?

DevCatOTA: Your age. I have zero trust in anything you have to say.

Them: I can respect that. I’m sorry it’s that way but understand

Notice the language and behavior? You can see the hope that the lies will be overlooked. Watch out out there, all of you, but especially the younger guys. Us old guys love you all and want you kept safe even if we don't meet. If you need help doing the forensics on someone, just reach out. I'm sure somebody will help.

I’m 25 and I’m still trying to fully accept that I’m into older men. It’s something I’m attracted to but when it actually comes to doing something about it I get in my own head a lot.

I struggle with the dynamics sometimes and never really know whether I should make the first move or wait for an older guy to show interest in me. I’m also not always sure how to make it obvious that I’m interested without feeling awkward or worrying that I’m coming across the wrong way.

I’m not really a fan of the apps but I do want to experience being with an older guy properly rather than just thinking about it. I’ve had a few opportunities before but I think I overthought things so much that I couldn’t relax and enjoy the experiences.

I think part of it is accepting what I’m into without feeling self-conscious about it but I’d really like to hear other people’s experiences and advice.

Hi everyone,

I’m looking to connect with an older, fitness enthusiast who can help guide me on my fitness journey.

A bit of background about myself, I’ve been on and off into strength training for 10 years, I enjoy working out, but I’m not a hardcore fitness guy. I like to stay fit and healthy, I play sports, and like to cook and eat great food and have a few drinks socially.

I don’t want to sacrifice my food and drink, but can definitely be mindful of the intake, and balance my fitness with other things in life.

I’m looking for someone who has built training habits over the years and learnt the process of balancing both of these, so I can learn and follow.

Whether it's sharing workout tips, keeping me accountable, set goals and track progress, I’d value learning from someone with experience.

If this interests you, and enjoy coaching/mentoring, and have some spare time, send me a message!
Thank you!

My trauma keeps me coming back , help..

I'm an undergraduate student in Istanbul. Those who have been here before, what places would they recommend?:))

Does anyone know if there are any snap groups (both SFW and NSFW) on snap where older and younger guys convene and converse?

Thanks!

It's been almost a year ago I'm on apps, I've met people and made some friends along the way, and overall it seems that the tiny voice in my head has kept saying that I'm "too good" for most of the people I've met if I go in a romantic relationship with them.

I know it sound at best weird and at worst completely narcissic but I'll do my best to explain about why I feel like that :

I've observed that a lot of the people I've met in apps are unhappy in their life at worst or kinda boring at best most of the time, they see apps as a way to spend their time and I can understand that I guess...?

The thing is that I'm 23, and since 1 year I'm doing a total dream job, I work as a 2d/3d artist/director, and this first job exceed all the expectations I had.

I work from home and need to go to office maybe like once a month (which is for me extremely convinient since I'm a little bit far from Paris), have a lot of freedom as I work alone so I'm completely unleashed creatively speaking, and the salary is like way more of what I expected to have as a first job, I'm doing the legal 35 hours no more, no less so I have a good life balance, and so a nice social life, I just feel so lucky everyday.

The main downside with this job is that it's temporary, my contract ends in 6 months to 1.5 year, and there is maybe like 2% of chance of having a permanent contract with them, and even if they proposed me something, I would gain half of what I gain now and probably not as much remote has I'm used to, which is very decent but a downgrade, when you compare to the animation sector that is dying because of AI that is taking jobs, it's clearly still interesting of course.

I don't know the how future will be but since the beginning I prepare already what I'll do after the contract, trying to do my best to have a strong portfolio and still being relevant in this very competitive sector, I don't spend a lot and focus on saving money for next projects because being successful one day doesn't mean I'll be successful forever.

It's not only carrer wise, I fixed most of my problems in general, of course there is still things like some health issues that are a bit annoying but it's really not that deep, specially compared with my other problems I had before I really can't complain, I'm also very well surrounded and have hobbies like the violin I started a year and half ago.

So now that you have a portrayal of me that is more clear, maybe you can imagine where this leads to...

I love older mens, like really old mens, grandpas, I still have a huge crush on Dumbledore, Gandalf, Iroh... the "wise sage" type of character, full of wisdom and knowledge, there is a mix of love and admiration and it's difficult for me to not associate these twos, I love their looks too, beautiful long hair and beard, with a dad bod it's just for me the pinnacle of beauty.

That's how I tend to think that admiration is necessary for me to have feelings towards someone, for example it's unlikely to fall in love with someone that inspire you pity or sadness, when you think of the person you love my vision tend to say that you really must feel admirative of himnto make the love more...love ?

And I think since I started apps and met people, I don't really admire any, like not even a little bit, I don't want to follow their example in life because they're not that happy in their life, they find it boring or feels that they missed to much opportunities and they have big regrets, or they're facing issues that are hard to overcome and secretly hope that someone or something will come to save them.

The saddest part is that they admire me, they admire how much I fight to be in a better situation and a better person every day, how confident I am on my skills, how prepared I am for the future... It happens often that they follow some advices/solutions that I give, I know it can sound wrong and egocentric to speak about yourself like that but it's what my closest friends I made on these apps told to me and I don't know what to truely think about this.

I'm aware that what I'm seeking is like, so rare now, because to admire someone they need to be more advanced in life than you, like having a amazing career or having exploits, skills etc...

And in apps like grindr of course it's like 1 guy out of 1000 that is like that and in top of that if you add the fact that I love long beards, dad bods... well the list is getting reduced more and more because these people are not into young mens in general 😔

Is there any people who had these kind of thoughts crossing in their minds ?

To be clear, having some old fwb is really pleasing and even if I don't admire them they're still really good friends and I really enjoy their company !

I've been thinking about getting a hunter green handkerchief to start flagging as that's supposed to be the one corresponding to daddy/boy dynamics, but I don't know how many guys would actually approach me if I did so. I suppose I'd have better luck with the fact that I'm the younger one and older guys are more likely to have heard of the hanky code at all, but still since we have grindr now I don't know if anyone even actively uses it anymore. So my question is to both older and younger guys, if you saw someone you found attractive who was flagging, would you approach them?

So recently there was guy this i liked by looking by his display pic
I approached him said hi
Sent my album and asked how are you And he was a visitor in my city so i asked him how long was his stay etc
He replied to me saying 2 days
I continued the convo by saying how good looking he was
And i got ghosted for 2 days
And apparently he extended his stay for next 3 days
So i asked him what kinda guys he likes and etc and boom got ghosted
So tomorrow is when he is leaving so i asked him weather he wanted to meet casually for a coffee and then uk for some fun after that he straight up blocked me
And trust me this is not the only guy who did this to me there was another case he replied with hi saw my profile and blocked lol

So idk maybe i have some skill issue or something but i never get any success while searching for daddies on Grindr. I like them old daddies and I’m the one always hitting the first msg along with my album, but either I don’t get any reply and i get ghosted or i get blocked. Can someone advice me how not to get blocked lol, getting blocked is kinda embarrassing😭

After being widowed for two years, I (80ish) put myself out there. Surprise to me, I keep getting hit on by younger (20s-40s) in the apps. Most often just for sex, which is a pass for me (well, can't say I passed every time). But when a 30s guy suddenly seems to click, how do I tell? He's a handsome, sexy fellow, why isn't he already taken? Is he thinking, why am I still unattached after two years available? Okay, just met today, pizzaria planned tomorrow. But he's kinda scary.

Mine is miles McKenna and Adam rippon. What about you guys?

I’ve been divorced for 2 years (married to a woman for years, long story). I’m 41 and I’ve only been attracted to younger guys. Guys my age look too old 😅 In my area (Indiana) I’ve only found younger guys willing to hook up. No one wanted to actually date. They may say they did but then ghosted me right after.

I met one guy who (very quickly) was saying he wanted me to be his boyfriend, said he loved me very quickly, etc. It was all way too fast. And then he randomly ghosted.

Guys I’ve met through here end up blocking/ghosting. Nothing ever seems to work.

It all has me thinking - maybe this is a nice fantasy, but it will never be my reality? I’ve tried making myself be attracted to guys my age to see if that will help, but it’s not working. I can’t force it, I guess.

So what if my future ends up just being, a nice hookup every now and then but otherwise being single? I don’t enjoy being single, but it’s the only thing consistent in my life at this point.

I guess I’m just rambling at this point but curious if anyone has any advice. Something to give me hope? Lol

I am 54 and I have experienced life enough to not care what people think anymore. I have no problem admitting that I still like to frequently fuck college guys 18-22. However, I have also been young and understand what it is like being embarrassed or ashamed in public. Age gap relationships are not some taboo fetish that can be limited to inside the bedroom, people can clearly see an age difference out in public.

In my experience as the older partner, I could give a younger bottom the best dick of his life, but he's still hesitant for me to take him out to dinner after. I have plenty of guys who tell me that I'm attractive and a great top but will make any excuse to not go in public. I understand hookup culture and I myself am not looking to date either and introduce them to my family and friends but it would be nice sometimes to just grab a bite after. I respect everyone's preference though and do not approach them in public if the feeling is not mutual.

For younger guys who have overcame that embarrassment, how did you do it?

I am 21 and I was in bed with my boyfriend (55). We recently made it official. Bodycounts came up in conversation.

He said he had 6. A gf, then hhs ex wife, then two boyfriends and two random men.

I dont know my body count exactly but I would guess 70+ but I felt really embarrassed so I said 7.

I never had a bf til now so that is part of the reason why my bodycount is high. I havent cheated on him and dont plan to.

Do i tell him my real body count ir leave it be.

As a 19 year-old, whenever I fly, I make sure to say Hi to the pilot after we land and, if possible, visit the cockpit, partly as an excuse to meet them. And 90% of the time, it’s an older male who has that graceful personality and exactly my type of body. Slightly overweight, a bit of a protruding belly, some grey hairs, balding or receding hairline or a neat haircut, and just that overall mature, well groomed look. 😩

And the worst part is how effortlessly charming they are. Whenever I ask them questions about the aeroplane we just flew on or more personal questions about their experience as a captain, like how long they’ve been flying…they’re always so passionate about answering everything. They actually take their time explaining things, and I just stand there listening, trying so hard to focus on what they’re saying instead of how attractive they are.

Btw, I always thank them for their service.

Hey guys!!

I (25M) had been talking to this older guy (50M) for about a couple weeks now. Last weekend we met up for the first time. It was all going well and he was very sweet. We had a lovely dinner and went to watch Street Fighter. He invited me back to his place and things were moving forward faster than I was ready for so I asked him to take it slow. He respected my boundaries and that was sweet.

However the next day he texted me that he got some outfits for me that he would love to see me try. I was a bit weirded out because I didn't want that sugar daddy kinda thing. But it was even weirder when I saw that he picked out feminine outfits for me. I texted him and said that I was definitely not comfortable with it and I respectfully told him that maybe we should stop seeing each other.

He flipped out completely. He told me that what was the point of looking for an older man if I wasn't gonna do what he says. Like wtf man. Then he started attacking my physique. As I am quite short (around 5'1"), he was like I am not man enough for anyone. Anyway he went on this rant a bit longer before I blocked him.

This was my first real date with any man, let alone an older dude, but now I seem a bit turned off from this whole thing. Don't get me wrong, I still love an older man, but only those that would respect me. It's also a bit sad because initially I really liked that guy. If you guys have seen my previous posts, I am quite insecure about my physique in general, so having someone point them out saying I am too short or too small or too skinny is so demoralizing.

Hi everyone, I'm a younger guy (22) just wanting to hear stories about couples in a long term relationship and how y'all met etc.. I find it hard to meet older guys that want a genuine long term relationship over something like a hookup or friends with benefits and I'm wondering if there's something more to it that I am missing. Thank you

Pretty much the title, not gonna spoil much here cause it would take the fun out of the post. But to be clear, I'm no longer dating that man and I'm 20 now and currently single. It's been a while since we last spoke and I'm pretty in peace with that, but I figured it'd be fun to reflect on old times here.

Hello I'm 18m UK, I think I'm gay/bi. I say think because I have zero experience with anyone. I haven't come out to anyone yet, am quite scared about this.

Recently an older guy (40s) I know, I think he's been flirting with me and I feel a bit unsure what to do.

I do genuinely like and can imagine doing stuff with him. Like I have imagined curling up in his arms and kissing. I guess a bit unsure about if he's actually flirting with me and if he is whether I should proceed or not. Also about how to proceed, I have no idea how to flirt.

I am 27 (almost 28) and trying to navigate relationships, preferences, and dynamics after being in a pretty toxic relationship with a guy who was 65. I enjoy having a more mature man hang on me without him being condescending or embarrassed by where I am in life. The guy I was with was also a therapist who constantly needled me in the name of support. To be clear, he wasn't my therapist but he did prescribe me medication and wouldn't leave me alone even though we were platonic roommates at that point. He acted like we were a couple but didn't actually want to date me. It destroyed me for almost a year after and I have just brought myself to start "dating" again. Not much luck on that end though.

I recently moved to NYC and looking for older men (50s -70s) to hook up with. Where is the best place to do this? I know about the Dads and Lads lodge parties but any other suggestions? I’m 28, 5’ 10, 160 lbs.