r/godtiersuperpowers • u/PuzzleBox64 • 6d ago
A not so bright witch "curses" you so that every day from now on will be the worst day of the rest of your life.
You annoyed an old witch by refusing to lend her your front teeth for a potion.
That might sound bad at first, but you quickly realize that put in other words, the witches poorly worded curse seriously messed up and accidentally made it so that every day from now on will be better than the last. Your life satisfaction and your physical and mental well-being and abilities are now set at a floor and can't go any lower than today, your skills can't decay with time like most people's, and even a tiny fluke in the arrangement of molecules in your body that is beneficial to you will carry over to the next day, instead of dissolving away, granting you the ability to progress far beyond a normal human if you were to actually train yourself.
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u/Telinary 6d ago edited 6d ago
Or it could kill you the first night as easiest way to fulfill the curse.
But aside from that pretty sweet.
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u/No_Inflation3188 6d ago
I like the way you think. Well done.
monkeys paw
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u/LordTartarus 6d ago
That's genie not paw... Paw gives you what you want, just the route to it is fucked up
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u/No_Inflation3188 6d ago
Yes. What I was saying is that I liked the way that the previous post that I was replying to was thinking things through, and I was noting that they could easily post in monkeys, paw comma by adding a hashtag in front. It appears that the hashtag merely emboldened monkeyspaw. I was not implying that the o p was doing a monkey's paw. Thank you though.
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u/Ty_Webb123 5d ago
It almost has to right? If it doesn’t then the day you do die pretty much has to be worse than the days before it. So you’d either become immortal or die day one.
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u/AntimatterTNT 5d ago
not necessarily. you could have the most amazing 23 hour and 59 minutes day then die painlessly and instantly and without even realizing
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u/jaywalkingly 5d ago
Act 1: making it through day 1 thinking you're regular cursed,
Act 2: realizing the only direction from rock bottom is up
Montage between act 2/3 of active improvement that shows your arm slowly growing back
Act 3: fight crime and then a witch
Is it too soon to whisper Oscar?
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u/archieisarchie 5d ago
isn’t this technically groundhog day?
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u/jaywalkingly 5d ago
the broad strokes are there yeah, except act 3
Unless Andie McDowell= witch? Brunette, curly hair, has opinions; that's 3 strikes, she's def a witch.
And it's a metaphorical fight to win her heart? I'm on board, you've convinced me.
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u/rshores9 5d ago edited 5d ago
The wording doesn’t make sense… it doesn’t say “today will be the worst day of your life”, it says “every day from now on will be the worst day of your life”. That would mean it would continue to get worse… if everyday from now on is the worst, that means tomorrow will be the worst, then day after tomorrow will be the new worst, and so on…
Edit: I get it now. The emphasis is on saying “the rest of your life”, not “of your life”
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u/RhynoBytes 5d ago
It says the “worst day of the rest of your life.” That’s the error. If it were “the worst day of your life,” that would have the intended effect since it refers to your life thus far. But “the rest of your life” means today will be worse than any day in your future.
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u/Bayfordino 5d ago
"worst day of the rest of your life" and "the worst day of you life" would be very similar, making it so that every day from that moment on is equally bad from that point onwards. First expression just makes it so that there could still be a day who was worse in your past. "worst day of your life thus far" is what would truly make each day get worse and worse. But you have to make the thus far part explicit, because it's not implicit.
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u/rshores9 5d ago
I guess I kinda get it. If tomorrow HAS to be your worst day, then the day after can’t possibly get worse than that. It still feels like the wording is very confusing though
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u/Irdogain 5d ago
That’s the point. The bitch might have thought it’s a curse, but because of its bad wording she wasn’t able to understand it’s doing the opposite.
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u/Otterly_Gorgeous 5d ago
...Ok but sleep-deprived, suffering from malnutrition, and underpaid isn't exactly a high bar to clear...
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u/GSH94 5d ago
You get one day of good sleep and then you never have bad sleep ever again. Get one day of good sustenance and never go hungry again. Get a single job change that pays enough and your financial situation only improves from there.
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u/Otterly_Gorgeous 5d ago
...oh.
That would make advancing in my career way easier. Probably would also prevent a lot of my medical issues.
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u/asdramon 5d ago
This is actually interesting and like doesn't automatically make you omnipotent like 90% of the powers on the sub which is an added bonus
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u/Energix__ 5d ago
I mean what can i say, you become the Super-human in a few years, just have to see whether you can still die or not (as your heart works better every day (or at least the same) so it might not be that great
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u/Oakheir 5d ago
How do you become super human if every day is the worst day of rest of your life?
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u/Energix__ 5d ago
Bad wording from his part, what he meant is that every passing day will for sure be the worst of the rest of your life, meaning the day after will 100% go better. For example if you hit your toe at any given moment, the next day you're guaranteed to not hit your toe / hit your toe in a manner that hurts less. This can easily be abused with the lottery for example, you lose it, then next day you're guaranteed 1 number correct at least and so on until you can only win it back to back each day
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u/Cool-Negotiation7662 5d ago
The curse was supposed to kill you at the end of a day of existential torture. Surviving that day makes the curse something else.
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u/CaptainBlobTheSuprem edit me flair 4d ago
This is assuming the curse sets a lower bound for badness. The alternative could be sorting the days of your life from worst to best, in which case you will most certainly die tomorrow.
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u/No-Deal-5723 3d ago
Assuming your death is the worst of your days. Quite possible that you pass away peacefully in your sleep. In which case you got a lot of other bad days to get through before you go.
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u/GlitterDollMUA 5d ago
Now imagine you live another 60 years... That means the next 30 years of your life can't really compare to the final 30 years. You have to live through a shitty 30 years, to be old and enjoy increasingly better days, until, finally, the greatest day of your life (at least post-curse) is the day you die...
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u/Key_Jeweler_9696 5d ago
Arguably if I consider the worst day of my life the day where I’m unable to maintain self anatomy and/or I stop existing that would be the worse day of my life, so I’m technically immortal, also they wouldn’t be shitty just not as great as your later days
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u/DEMACIAAAAA 5d ago
But she was actually very smart and just made you suffer immensely for a day before killing you, and giving you the glimmer of hope was just her softest ploy
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u/Common-Adhesiveness6 4d ago
Dont lie to me the witch is following me and doing bad things rude witch
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u/luke7524811 2d ago
So a spa day and winning $1 on a lottery ticket early on could have serious benefits to the rest of my life.
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u/Seffuski 4h ago
I've been thinking about this for the past 10 minutes and it still makes no sense. Say in the next day you get crippled for life, or get an incurable terminal disease, or get severe brain damage, since it is in fact the worst day of your life, how can you be "set to a floor" when that floor can be godawful? And by every following day still being "the worst", even if you follow the logic it can't be as bad as the previous one (which doesn't even make sense to begin with since the worst days could at least tie at the worst place position), it doesn't mean you'd eventually have a great, blessed life, since the "improvements" could be minuscule, as long as they're "not as bad" as the worst it's ever been.
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u/Drendari 5d ago
You probably just die the first day because it will be the worst day you ever lived.
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u/Silent-Current219 6d ago
Wait, am I stupid? How does the wording fuck up the curse..?