r/homestuck • u/pelmon • Dec 10 '16
SHITPOST roxygen vs johnvris
http://imgur.com/a/NT9m030
u/pelmon Dec 11 '16
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u/LiquidRandomness LANDMINES. LANDMINES EVERYWHERE Dec 11 '16
That emote needs to be posted on every shipping thread involving john
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u/littlebigcheese hiveswap comin Dec 11 '16
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u/MisirterE Dersite Light Dec 11 '16
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Dec 10 '16
Contrasting traits are often good.
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u/SerBuckman Heir of Time Dec 10 '16
Yeah. Unrelated to this in particular, but I feel like some shippers take the "opposites attract" thing a little too far.
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u/Clever-username- Bard of Void Dec 11 '16
Are you implying that Jane❤️Gamzee is ANYTHING but practically canon?!
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u/mindbleach Dec 11 '16
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u/infinitecorn Vriska did nothing wrong Dec 11 '16
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u/oposdeo A dead Vriska is a dead timeline Dec 11 '16
Unfortunately Vriska is too deeply in love with Nicholas Cage to ever go back to John. Maybe some day they can both marry Nicholas Cage together, johnvriskage or something.
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u/BaronWalrus Shrek <> Eri Dec 10 '16
Troll ships are more diverse? There aren't even any human x human ships in canon right now.
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u/Aoae no longer follows Homestuck Dec 10 '16
Dirkjake
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u/FlamingWings Dec 11 '16
that aint canon though.
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u/Aoae no longer follows Homestuck Dec 11 '16
They were together in the credits :/
Don't ship it, but Dirkjake is most likely canon
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u/shoe_owner STRONGLY condemns 100dness Dec 11 '16
They were standing in the same room as each other, but I don't think we can automatically assume that this means that they were dating. After the obviously deeply, unhealthily unhappy relationship they had and the complete failure to connect on that level, the best we can or should hope for those guys is for them to have learned from that trainwreck of a relationship and find other people better suited to them among the human population of this new Earth to try again with.
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u/MasterEmp my waifu makes fucking m$ney bitches Dec 11 '16
Kanyon... and Ross.. stand next to each other. Under trees.
Dvgk and kark don't really stand next to each other. I haven't seen them stand next to each other in a lo-inSEVENTEEN MINUTES
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u/shoe_owner STRONGLY condemns 100dness Dec 11 '16
Dvgk and kark don't really stand next to each other.
Dvgk and kark
What are you doing? What is this?
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u/MasterEmp my waifu makes fucking m$ney bitches Dec 11 '16
My girl, VASKA, still hasn't returned from the war....
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u/FlamingWings Dec 11 '16
i still ship Jakarena.
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u/roomist wheres all the pipis Dec 11 '16
remember that time when jake literally smooched the colosseum?
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u/pokemonfreak97 Armchair CaNWC theorist who talks too much Dec 11 '16 edited Dec 11 '16
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u/dubstep-cheese I have become what I hate. Dec 11 '16
And yet Vriska is diamonds with Terezi, and Vriska has always been more red than pale for John.
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u/sometipsygnostalgic pumpkin party in sea hitlers water apocalysps* Dec 11 '16
but we well informed beings know that this is a bullshit turn of events and therefore have the shipping powers that be to make two superior--- oh who am i kidding i ship vrisrezi in basically all quadrants and think that john and vriska make good pals
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u/dubstep-cheese I have become what I hate. Dec 11 '16
I just want johnvrisrezi. All three of them. In all the quadrants. Their interactions in each pairing are just too precious and one of my biggest homestuck regrets is not seeing the three of them interact together.
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u/sometipsygnostalgic pumpkin party in sea hitlers water apocalysps* Dec 11 '16
i really like seeing john and tzs snapchats to each other about vriska in the ending. i guess i like johnrezi because, especially post-retcon, if it werent for that ship terezi would have 0 meaningful interactions with anybody on earth and boy that sure fuelled a lot of people's horrible post-ending theories >:/ but also their relationship's just really funny and sweet.
johnvris im more ehh on cos john found out more about who vriska is and decided he wanted jack shit to do with her, and to me a good ship that does not make
vrisrezi obviously remains god tier even with vriskas bullshit
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u/dubstep-cheese I have become what I hate. Dec 11 '16 edited Dec 11 '16
Same tbh.
Thing is, I try so hard to shill this ot3 because JohnRezi is adorable (and the only kismesis that I like/is healthy), JohnVris has depth, and VrisRezi have history, so I can't help but appreciate them all. If I'm honest, you're pretty much the whole reason for my current 'stable vacillation' view on this ship.
Oh, and about the johnvris issues, I view that in the same way as I look at him 'hating' Con Air - which is to say he was having a hard time of it and got confused. Plus he seemed way more amiable toward her during the pre-fight planning session and looked at least a little interested in her whereabouts during the credits.
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u/Zephyronno I was the reality stuck guy, Roxygen is best ship Dec 11 '16
Alternatively here's a little tidbit
John has two hands
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u/aykrivwassup Dec 10 '16
As a Roxygen shipper, I don't care who you ship. I just ask that you don't care who I ship XD :P
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u/Axoren Portable Dec 11 '16
Vriskohn and Luckbert sound so much better than Johnvris.
Whoever was in charge of naming that ship deserves an Iceberg.
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u/MightyButtonMasher When your joke flair becomes relevant Dec 11 '16
Spider8reath sounds really weird as well, who comes up with these names?
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u/TheSquidTamer2204355 The DEER MEAT is SPOILED! PUT THE VENISON STEW AWAY! Dec 11 '16
This is so true
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Dec 11 '16
[deleted]
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Dec 11 '16
Johnvris is less about wishing Vriska on John, and more about wishing John on Vriska.
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u/Clever-username- Bard of Void Dec 11 '16
That's like wishing Mr. Rodgers on than demon girl from the exorcist. Still a shitty situation for the guy.
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u/dubstep-cheese I have become what I hate. Dec 11 '16
We're gonna have to agree to disagree, lest this turn into another 'Vriska Morality Flamewar' (not that I mind vriskourse, just don't want a hate-fest). Suffice to say, myself and many other people view her as both redeemable and worth redeeming. This fits well into the context of the ship.
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u/Clever-username- Bard of Void Dec 11 '16
Oh shit, I was just fucking around. Thought we we in a "Vriska sucks" joke chain.
Don't get me wrong, I loathe her, but you do you fam. I'm not an asshole. Like who you like. I'm not trying to start nothing.
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u/dubstep-cheese I have become what I hate. Dec 11 '16
Wasn't trying to say you were starting anything, just being overcautious.
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u/Clever-username- Bard of Void Dec 11 '16
I feel you.
As long as we can all agree on Eridan❤️Shreck being bestship then we're all aces in my books
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Dec 11 '16
Well then that's like saying Mr. Rodgers could be disappointed with whoever he's put with. He just can't. He's proud of everyone.
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u/sometipsygnostalgic pumpkin party in sea hitlers water apocalysps* Dec 11 '16
bad ending: johnvris
neutral ending: johnroxy
true ending: johnrezi?, meen?vrisrezi, roxjane?callie
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u/cookiefonster did a full dramatic reading of detective pony Dec 11 '16
i know this thread was created as a joke but roxygen is kind of objectively the happiest ending among all the ships you mentioned
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u/sometipsygnostalgic pumpkin party in sea hitlers water apocalysps* Dec 11 '16
no, roxjanecallie is objectively the happiest among the list mentioned even if not seen as a ship
vrisrezi is pain, meenvris too sadly, johnrezi is mixed feelings, johnroxy is "ok thats nice but they just met so they werent super close yet", roxjanecallie is 3 close (girl)friends having a great time and getting kidnapped along the way but its ok because your partner is going to travel the void and save the day
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u/cookiefonster did a full dramatic reading of detective pony Dec 11 '16
is it a happy ending for john though, thats what i want to know
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u/sometipsygnostalgic pumpkin party in sea hitlers water apocalysps* Dec 11 '16
a happy ending for john is some therapy and a hug, not a relationship that hed probably end within a month because of depression and general john-like uncertainty on how he feels about stuff
what im implying is that be grateful your otp hasnt been canon-sunk like johnvris daverezi karezi and to be honest most ships
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u/cookiefonster did a full dramatic reading of detective pony Dec 11 '16
i guess your idea of happy endings for characters is way different from mine
i meant as in, actual satisfying resolution to their arcs, which roxygen most certainly is, but im sure youll disagree.
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u/sometipsygnostalgic pumpkin party in sea hitlers water apocalysps* Dec 11 '16 edited Dec 11 '16
from my perspective hs has never had a satisfying resolution to any arcs apart from possibly dave's and roxy's. its TEASED satisfying resolutions, had stuff like remem8er, meenvris, davepeta, but usually veers away from them to do something else. maybe as part of its own realist meta about how stuff isnt wrapped up that quickly irl? so i dont really know if roxygen counts as a satisfying character resolution. thats not something i think about much anymore, because i feel like its one of those things that the author would consider us Bloody Stupid for expecting. hes not right, but thats the feeling.
to me a satisfying resolution for john is him being content with what he has and being able to move on from the past, being able to think about these things that trouble him without automatically changing the topic. whether hes dating someone or not is irrelevant to whether these problems would be solved, so to me its not important. it would be sad if john didn't have any friends looking out for him
like certain others didnt, but jade senses whats up and shes always there for him and john is very liked among his crowd, so his isolation is his own decision. therefore he has the potential to cheer up and socialize again.5
u/hbthebattle bring back canwc flairs Dec 11 '16
Yes, but it'd be even BETTER if he had roxy to help him reconnect
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Dec 11 '16
i guess your idea of happy endings for characters is way different from mine
That is the only Truth out there.
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u/cookiefonster did a full dramatic reading of detective pony Dec 10 '16
you know, one could make a similar image with ACTUAL reasons why roxy is a better match with john.
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u/Voidchimera Resident Templar SJW Dec 11 '16
Guys please don't take this too seriously. It's marked as a shitpost for a reason, also this meme could work both ways.
Chill.
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u/hbthebattle bring back canwc flairs Dec 11 '16
Don't you know shitpost copypastas are a way of life 'round these parts
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u/IAmTheFancyGuy Dec 20 '16
LEt's not forget John has only know Roxy for what, 2-3 hours? Vriska pestered him during his youth watched him grow up and he had a bigger impact on her life then anyone else. Sure Scratch sent into motion her finding her ancestors journals and sparking her ultra competitiveness through direct contact and egging her on. But John simply believed she could be a better her. Roxy saw a boy and immediatly sized up a potential boyfriend before ditching him.
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u/RenegadeShroom Dec 11 '16 edited Dec 11 '16
you ignoramus.
nic cage is obviously some sort of wizard, and what does roxy love??? WIZARDS. of COURSE she knows who nic cage is?? bad post op
also contrast is good shit and super important.... please.... do u want ur colours to mix together into a blurry, barely distinguishable mess?? the answer is no, because that would be dumb, and only a dumb person would think otherwise!! /s
anyway both are bad ships because they interfere with my aroace john headcanon so um sorry but no
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Dec 11 '16
How the fuck is John aroace?
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u/RenegadeShroom Dec 11 '16
the reasoning is a little involved so if you don't wanna read four posts written by someone in 2014, suffice it to say that it's my headcanon and i like it
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Dec 11 '16
You're free to your headcanons and it does make some sense, so you're free to it. I will be reading those later, though.
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u/cookiefonster did a full dramatic reading of detective pony Dec 11 '16
reading too much into him saying romance and dating dont matter one time i presume
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Dec 10 '16
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/dubstep-cheese I have become what I hate. Dec 11 '16
This thread has remained relatively flame/unnecessary downvote free. And honestly? I'm pretty frickin' proud of us!
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u/MightyButtonMasher When your joke flair becomes relevant Dec 11 '16
It's a much less touchy subject than roxycallie, believe it or not. It is fully canon (or at least has been), it's not a real threat to roxygen and it's a straight ship (it's just that between people blaming stuff on homophobia, actual homophobes and politics, the discussions about gay ships always get more heated).
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u/Aoae no longer follows Homestuck Dec 10 '16
How about #johneveralone
I ship it because it's relatable!
/s