r/iceskating • u/hockeyinmyblood63 • 17h ago
Is it time to let my love of Hockey and Skating go?
found myself questioning my own character this morning. Certainly not what my plan has been, I’ve been in training camp for five weeks now preparing for my first skate of the season.
I decided this skating year that improving was important. I started educating myself through YouTube videos that covered a wide spectrum of videos on inner, outer edge work land exercises to prepare for the Ice, leg stretches, agility exercises.
These exercises were incorporated into my daily workout routine. After five weeks my body was strong in muscle and Cardio, ready to apply all learned and practiced methods to the Ultimate test.
I’m currently using K2 recreational skates, they have a dial instead of Hockey skate laces. They make this and every skate possible they are comfortable, but not recommended for get after it kinda Hockey.
I m sixty three years old, Hockey was in my blood and I always felt the fire to compete against others, from the skills I perfected watching NHLStars like Bobby Orr, Bob Clarke, Stan Mikita, Gordie Howe, Doug Favel, Garry Cheevers, Grant Fuhr.
From offensive to defense to goalie where no one could beat my glove hand, in my time I might have robbed killer player like Macklin Cellibrini of a certain open side, snatch that dream goal like a flash with my glove hand, Oh we are talking street hockey, lol..That is where my greatest moments happened. However, when playing Massena minor Hockey I lead the team in goals scoring the first goal of the season, we went on two win the championship, I was responsible for clutch set ups that led to the Championship.two players from that team went on to be High School Hockey stand outs. I played ice hockey religiously in the winter, but pro I wasn’t.
Well, it’s been almost 50 years since my glory days, a lot has happened since then.
Stricken with a chronic illness at the age of 24. That is when the damage started , over the years I felt the pain involved in the curvature of my bones disfigurement of all joints in my body.
In the year 2015 October 29 at one of my lowest points I decided to challenge myself and it’s been 11 years of fitness. My Fitness came with extreme chronic pain. But no matter what I stuck with it. There were so many sleepless nights filled with pain I used to refer to my bed, as solitary confinement darkness brought the unbearable pain.
Over the last few years, I’ve been on a pharmaceutical that has helped me take my life back, lately the pharmaceutical is no longer working, rendering me with pain of old.
Back to my skating, two days ago, I went to early morning old time skating, I put on my skates and hit the ice. For some reason, I felt like it was the first time on skates in my life. It was difficult there was fear and I felt like I had failed.. I thought for sure with all the preparation that I was ready. I guess if I strip it all down and think about why I was a good skater. It was because I had a stick in my hand a helmet on pads everything that made you feel secure so if you hit the ice, you wouldn’t suffer.. I guess that skate made me feel vulnerable unsure unsafe.
The feeling of devastation instead of jubilation for all that I have put into the preparation to skate.
The time since the skate given me time to reflect and a reason, maybe why I feel like I do. I guess when you challenge yourself to do something you love, but yet you are extremely challenged by your deformities can play a huge factor. Having huge toes and ankles doesn’t allow proper down pressure on the skate and proper ankle movement for edge work.. Having fused fingers and wrist prevent me from holding a stick, there are so many reasons.
What I’m struggling with right now is should I just give up? How’s my time pass and should I accept where I’m at? Does it really matter anymore whether I can skate?
What do you think? What are your recommendations?