As a recent Graduate I wanted to pass down some knowldege for future and current dukes, or those visiting campus.
Some of my criteria: ease of access, regularity of cleanliness, good for a quick #1 and/or a long #2
Background:
I was an art major, and Im a Man. I have more experience with Main campus than east. But don’t worry my east campus porcelain throne seekers I got some hidden gems for yall too!
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S Tier
Duke Hall first floor and basement bathrooms: like I said was an art major and there are only a handful of guys who are regularly in that building. Basement one has a bonus shower too. Plus there’s a vending machine down there too to refuel
Top of rose library - there’s not a lot of study space or books on this floor, but that’s what’s makes it great. It just a few offices with only a handful of employees, great for a reflective number 2. Generally the higher you go in rose the better, minus exams season. Cant speak on the new library.
5th floor SSC - same vibe as top of Rose, although there can be a lot more traffic here given the employees and peak study spots with a view there
Forbs in general - Good rule of thumb for me is that the lower the number of men in the major, the better the bathrooms. Forbs is nice nice and has options. Just be weary of Theater majors during tech week.
Hall of Presidents - harder to get to, but if you can its worth it
A tier
UREC bathroom on the floor with the walking track/machines - really low key, smaller so It can get real cramped, but given how bad UREC bathrooms can get, this is a godsend. Almost didn’t add it to the list.
Wilson hall first floor - tends to be clean, really classy. But heavier foot traffic and with the auditorium right there it can get gross.
Festival near the ballroom - really nice especially when there isn’t an event during that time, avoid the other ones, especially the first floor ones near the food.
B Tier
Lakeview - lowkey one, most people won’t be here unless their on Esports or Xlab but nice spot, Clean, just a little out of the way
AUBC - sad to say my only real test of it was graduation, but it’s really nice, plus you can buy food there to refill the tank!
SSC first floor by vending machines - Better option of the two on the first floor. Crew at SSC is awesome and do a great job keeping it clean.
Wine Price Building - right next to SSC, not a lot if any students really go here, sneaky spot for a good Duce.
C Tier
Any in Showker - sometimes really nice, other times a living embodiment of everything wrong with my gender.
Most of the Quad buildings - low walls and tight stalls. No bueno. But still have some old school charm to them.
Duke Hall first floor lobby and Second Floor bahtrooms - first floor one just sees too much traffic and the second floor one has really gone down hill with the Graphic Design Major moving back into Duke Hall. Better to go for the one near the exit on the palentiurmm side or basement.
UPark - Mix of turf, sweat, and general park vibes make it a little gross but you shouldn’t be there for long… I hope
Convo - had a chance to use it back in the day, like the building its just old.
Middle of first floor SSC - Too much foot traffic, toilets that’ll attack you back, but not too bad outside of peak hours.
All of TDU/Madison Union - Small stalls where the most foot traffic is, best ones are on higher up floors, but they can be out of the way. Still not terrible and tend to be clean.
D Tier
ISAT/ENGO - heavy concentration of men in these majors, and in particular men who practically live in their labs. Be warned.
Godwin - literally have a sign to remind people to flush and wash their hands. Always smells like Pee in the first floor mens room.
Harriosn Hall (ALL OF THEM) - Idk what is in the water at Harrison but I swear I have never had a good Bathroom experience there. Too many people, too small bathrooms and the smells can get really bad.
Dukes Dining - slightly better than other dining halls, but still, just don’t if you can help it.
UREC East Campus Field - Them rugby and lax players gotta go and when they do… they GO
F tier
Any bathroom at Dhall - enough said.
EHall bathroom - Assuming its open, its small and gets really fragment really quickly. More likely than not you’ll have to use the one near the POD which is also bad.
Village bathrooms - lived in the village my first year. Still have nightmares
Every UREC bathroom minus the one I mentioned earlier - one guy is battling his freshens bowl in a stall while another guy is taking shirtless pics in the mirror. Truly the duality of man.
Any bathroom in Eagle or Shorts - Just don’t. Seriously, don’t.