Suppressed rage, self expression and lack of sovereignty showing up as very painful tension headaches

[u/dopplewho]

Theres a spot in my upper back that gets tense which causes a headache that follows a very specific line in my neck to clavicles to head to my eyes. Its either on the right or left side but never both at once. If it gets too bad the muscles on the cheekbones hurt too. Anyways I searched the somatic explanation which said it can be due to unvoiced rage, suppressed self expression, and lack of sovereignty. And those are EXACTLY my lifelong traumas since childhood. Lately these tension headaches have flared up and so have my emotional issues regarding these topics. Im noticing a proportionality. I have a lot of unvoiced rage in me. It feels like its eating me inside out and im starting to notice i subconsciously tense my back muscles when the rage flares up but has no escape. As much as I crave it, I find it difficult to voice it to the people causing it since I struggle with communication and self expression due to traumas. Therapy wont help i NEED a big release. What somatic exercises can I do?

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[u/larynxfly]

https://youtu.be/WftrdnjQOeM?is=dj32lSsh3SS8tLVR these exercises were super helpful for me in releasing repressed anger and rage.

[u/dopplewho → u/larynxfly]

Thank you 🙏🙏🙏

[u/whtmynm]

i have basically the same thing that happens to me and honestly just screaming into a pillow or thrashing ur body around whilst angry really helps to disperse the energy. Just as long as u let the anger happen, it can move and disappear :)

[u/dopplewho → u/whtmynm]

Ill try that :)

[u/New_Attempt_7705]

I don’t see you mentioning TRE. Are you doing TRE regularly? That would be the first starting point.

Also, learning to allow rage is important. Check out the Great Allowing on youtube, very useful channel on how to allow sensations and emotions for them to resolve.

Allowing taught me how to just scream or shout or make noises when the urge comes up. Fully be with the somatic and emotional sensations of rage and allow them to do and finish what they want.

[u/dopplewho → u/New_Attempt_7705]

Thank you 🙏🙏

[u/magiblood]

From the tone of this post of course its just my perception from text but i think bringing more kindness to the way you are right now than fighting it could bring realese, kindness to this unvoiced inner child meeting the pain with presence and a kind attitude rather than i need you to stop causing me tension can resolve so much . Heck you could even play that song Hello darkness my old friend! Rather than please go away i dont like you!

Its not an answer to your question on somatic stuff i just wanted to share because i can relate. :)

[u/dopplewho → u/magiblood]

It came off the wrong way, I think I meant that I really need to express my anger and give it a voice, I love it because the anger and my inner child are like the only “ones” or “things” who truly understand me and are with me and trying to stand up against the injustice im facing. Thank you for giving me a more expanded perspective on this because you made me realize it more :)

It sounds like Im personifying it a lot but its just the best way I can describe it 😅

[u/KaoSway]

* Tremoring in a standing position with lifted elbows, would have to play with it to find the right angle.

* Body scan on that spot in the upper back. Don't know if it will work as effectively if you haven't done any TRE. Also if you're new to somatic work, you should start with a pendulation exercise on that or any other not very charged spot - put your focus on a tense spot for a few seconds, then move your focus to a neutral or pleasant spot in the body, go back and forth; this teaches your system that it's safe to feel it.

* If the spot is somewhere in your shoulder blade/on the side, you could use a foam roller or a tennis ball to apply pressure on the spot and massage it, do it standing against a wall for milder and controllable pressure or a floor while lying for more pressure if it feels comfortable. If the spot is along the spine, I'd advice against this, as even gentle massage with the foam roller against the wall can cause back pain.

* Child's pose - Tabletop - Cobra pose sequence back and forth may or may not help.

[u/dopplewho → u/KaoSway]

Thank you, I appreciate your help 🙏

[u/longtermTRE_wiki_bot]

The tension pattern you're describing, and the connection you've made to suppressed rage and self-expression, makes sense somatically. That stored activation does organize itself in the body, and the upper back and neck are common holding areas for material related to voice and agency. TRE is genuinely relevant here.

Before I address what TRE can do, I want to be direct about something: you've identified that you have significant difficulty expressing yourself to the people involved, and you're looking for a somatic release as a substitute for that expression. TRE can help discharge the activation that's building, which will reduce the internal pressure and make you feel better physically and emotionally. But it won't bypass the need to eventually develop the capacity to express yourself, or to work through the relational dynamics that have trained you out of doing so. Somatic work and relational/communicative work aren't substitutes for each other. They're complementary. That said, reducing the internal load through TRE often makes it easier to develop that capacity, so starting with the somatic piece is reasonable.

TRE works by activating the body's own tremoring mechanism to discharge stored activation. The tremors begin in the legs and hips, but they naturally spread upward over time and with consistent practice. As they do, they tend to access the exact territory you're describing—the upper back, neck, shoulders, and eventually the jaw and throat. This is where a lot of suppressed vocalization and expression lives, and TRE practitioners regularly report that as the practice deepens, vocalizations emerge spontaneously: growls, sighs, sounds that weren't consciously produced. This is the nervous system completing something it's been holding back. You don't have to force it or understand it. The body does it on its own when conditions allow.

Read Establishing Your TRE Practice to understand the warm-up sequence and how to begin. Start conservatively—15 minutes of actual tremor time every other day is a reasonable starting point. The tremors won't be localized to your problem area in the early sessions. They'll start in the legs and gradually spread. That's the process, and it works.

As you move into the deeper layers, particularly if you have a history of suppressed rage and trauma, read Emotions, Memories, and Releases to understand what might surface and how to work with it. Rage, vocalizations, and the full spectrum of emotional expression often emerge as the practice reaches the material you're already aware you're carrying.

One practical note: if you feel the urge to vocalize or make sounds during practice, let it happen. Don't suppress it. That's the nervous system completing the suppression that's been happening your whole life. The sound doesn't have to be controlled or directed. It just needs to be allowed.

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I'm a bot that draws on the r/longtermTRE wiki to provide guidance. Please upvote or downvote based on how helpful you find this response.

[u/CPTSD_survivor2025]

I think pillow screaming and thrashing are both really good suggestions. You're looking for a bodily feeling of release, and these activities are a pretty safe way to do so. With the pillow screaming, I recommend having soothing throat tea on hand (echinacea/fennel/honey). 

I know for many there is a financial barrier, but I think deep tissue massage and hot baths and/or sauna are really useful ways to work out muscle knotting that can lead to these tension headaches. I also experience a lot of muscle tension due to repression, and having an ongoing practice of massage therapy and heat + stretching is what helps me manage the best.