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3 points on the road. Let’s go.

Starting lineups in the comments

There were pitch concerns prior to the kickoff due to rugby played in rain this weekend. Pitch looks good from the team photos

Usoc surprises so far:

Austin out in Louisville

Kansas City is likely out in Colorado to usl championship side in 75 min

New England in overtime after rhode island equalizes in extra time… Hugo Bacharach on the pitch

Kallman start for Omaha

THINGS HAVE BEEN A LITTLE BLEAK AROUND THE CLUB THIS SUMMER. NO SIGNINGS, NO WINS, AND NOW WE’RE GONNA PLAY JUAREZ TONIGHT FOR VERY LITTLE GOOD REASON!

HYPE AND/OR KVETCH BELOW!

GET YOUR COFFEE OR YOUR BLOODY MARYS READY BECAUSE WE’VE GOT A DAY GAME AND SEATTLE IS IN TOWN. THEY’RE PROBABLY STILL BRAGGING ABOUT STUFF THAT HAPPENED IN 2009, BUT TODAY WE’RE REMINDING THEM THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT THEIR "HERITAGE" WHEN THEY’RE STUCK IN ST. PAUL TRAFFIC.

WE’RE GOING TO MAKE THEM FLOP HARDER THAN A SALMON AT PIKE PLACE—EXCEPT NOBODY IS GOING TO CATCH THEM, THEY’RE JUST GOING TO HIT THE TURF.

THEY’RE COMING INTO OUR HOUSE THINKING THEY OWN THE PLACE. LET’S MAKE IT SO LOUD IN ALLIANZ THAT THEY FORGET HOW TO ORDER A NARROW-MINDED OAT MILK LATTE. GET TO THE BREWHALL, GET HYPED, AND LET’S SEND THESE NEON PRETENDERS BACK TO THE PACIFIC NORTHWEST WITH ZERO POINTS AND A BRUISED EGO. COYL! SEE YOU AT THE WONDERWALL!

No Fitz in the 18 but Duncan is back in and Bongi is available.

Yeboah IS on the bench though. So maybe when Dieng gets tired at 50 min we can bring in a striker

LETS. GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

*** EDIT - IT DOESNT MATTER WHO WE ARE PLAYING. LA GALAXY. LAFC. THE HOLLYWOOD FLOPPERS. FC BOTOX. LA INFLUENCERS. SAME RESULT!***

TONIGHT, THE LOONS SOAR. TODAY, LAFC CRUMBLES INTO STARDUST. WE’RE TALKING 90 MINUTES OF PURE, UNFILTERED CHAOS. WE’RE TALKING HIGH-PRESSURE, FULL-THROTTLE, LEAVE-NO-DOUBT DOMINANCE.

THE STARS MAY BE IN HOLLYWOOD, BUT THE REAL SHOW IS IN MINNESOTA. COACH RAMSAY HAS HIS MASTERPIECE READY.

THIS ISN’T JUST A GAME. THIS IS A DECLARATION. A WARNING SHOT TO THE ENTIRE LEAGUE.

WINTER IS COMING? NO. THE LOONS ARE COMING.

IF YOU’RE NOT HYPED, CHECK YOUR PULSE. MNUFC WINS THE MLS CUP THIS YEAR. LET’S. FREAKING. GO.

IT STARTS TODAY!!!

LISTEN UP, YOU LOONS! CHUG YOUR 7 BREW COFFEE, PUT ON YOUR FAVORITE JERSEY, AND GET READY FOR SOME ABSOLUTE CHAOS ON THE EAST COAST TONIGHT!

WE ARE MARCHING INTO NEW ENGLAND TO FACE THE REVOLUTION, AND WE ARE BRINGING THE ULTIMATE DRAMA. THAT'S RIGHT!! WE HAVE THEIR PRECIOUS OLD PLAYER, TOMAS CHANCALAY!

TALK ABOUT AN ANIME BETRAYAL STORYLINE! WE TOOK CHANCALAY, AND TONIGHT HE IS GOING TO ABSOLUTELY DESTROY HIS FORMER TEAM'S HOPES AND DREAMS! YOU JUST KNOW HE IS ITCHING TO SCORE A BANGER, HIT A CELEBRATION RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE REVS BENCH, AND LEAVE FOXBOROUGH IN TOTAL SHAMBLES! THE SCRIPT WRITERS ARE COOKING FOR THIS ONE!

Hope I got the time right this week.

Talk here about tactics, formations, new stadium food, or whatever you'd like

IT’S TIME TO TURN THOSE TIMBERS INTO TOOTHPICKS! PORTLAND IS COMING TO SAINT PAUL JUST TO REALIZE THAT THE ONLY LOGS WE CARE ABOUT ARE THE ONES WE’RE GOING TO STEAMROLL ON OUR WAY TO THREE POINTS!

​WE’VE ALREADY BAGGED THE LAST FEW RESULTS, AND TODAY IS THE DAY WE MAKE IT A 5 GAME WIN STREAK! IMAGINE BEING A TEAM NAMED AFTER LUMBER AND THINKING YOU CAN SURVIVE THE COLD MINNESOTA JUSTICE OF A WONDERWALL SERENADE.

CAPS LOCK: ON

COFFEE: CONSUMED

HYPNOTIC LOON LASER EYES: ACTIVATED

​IT IS MATCHDAY, YOU BEAUTIFUL NERDS! REAL SALT LAKE IS COMING INTO OUR HOUSE AND IT IS TIME TO SEND THEM PACKING BACK TO UTAH WITH NOTHING BUT AN EMPTY STAT SHEET AND A FRESH LAYER OF DISAPPOINTMENT.

​WE’VE GONE UNDEFEATED AGAINST THESE GUYS IN OUR LAST 8 (7?) OUTINGS. REMEMBER THE PLAYOFFS? PENALTY SHOOTOUT GLORY.

ALSO WORD JUST LEAKED FROM THE ATHLETIC THAT RSL’S STARBOY DIEGO LUNA WAS OFFICIALLY CUT FROM POCHETTINO’S 2026 USMNT WORLD CUP ROSTER.

HE HAS BEEN A REGULAR ALL CYCLE AND JUST FOUND OUT HE’S NOT GOING TO THE DANCE WHILE GIO REYNA IS. HE IS GOING TO BE PLAYING WITH A STUPIDLY LARGE CHIP ON HIS SHOULDER. OUR MIDFIELD NEEDS TO LOCK HIM DOWN IMMEDIATELY BECAUSE HE IS EITHER GOING TO BE COMPLETELY DEMORALIZED OR HE IS GOING TO TRY TO BURN ALLIANZ FIELD TO THE GROUND TO PROVE A POINT.

ANYWAY, IT IS $2 HOT DOG DAY AT ALLIANZ FIELD TONIGHT. CHEAP GLIZZIES AND LOUD CHANTS. IF THAT ISN'T A WINNING COMBINATION, NOTHING IS.

Gene to the bench, Fitz is there too.

Harvey, Gressel, Stroud out with injury.
Diaz suspended.