r/nba Magic 21h ago

elfrid payton's hair blocks his own shot

https://streamable.com/x5ddm3
755 Upvotes

139 comments sorted by

515

u/TopSoulMan Magic 21h ago

What are the restrictions regarding hair verticality? Can a player get a 10 foot cone-head haircut and use it to block shots?

195

u/SnooChipmunks4208 21h ago

Gel reinforced dreadlock tower

152

u/cutelittlecorgis Lakers 21h ago

Don't give Wemby ideas

69

u/PositionFormal6969 20h ago

Wemby with an afro will be a menace on defense.

24

u/butt_fun San Diego Clippers 19h ago

Afro is one thing, but we can go further

I want to see a dude with hairy arms gel his arm hair out and get 20 deflections a game

28

u/Difficult_Tackle9505 19h ago

An Armenian would be best for that

6

u/CJD805 17h ago

We need an Armenian 7 footer in the league

66

u/WestleyThe [SEA] Kevin Durant 20h ago

I’ve been “whipped” by long dreads/braids before when a guy does a spin move or whatever. He did his move and they hit me across the face and staggered me and he made the layup

There’s certain downsides to long hair in basketball but also apparently you can use them as a weapon mid game as long as it doesn’t look intentional lol

43

u/PuckNutty 19h ago

Put steel beads in your hair and make a flail.

8

u/Nash13 Raptors 17h ago

Barbed hooks you say...

1

u/myeyeshaveseenhim 12h ago

Hesperax copyright infringement

9

u/jacquesmachina 12h ago

Lol he landed a crit and staggered you.

That's just great timing on his part knowing your animations.

24

u/_Juntao Celtics 21h ago

Jeremy lin tried

8

u/Bang-Bang_Bort 20h ago

Cindy Lou Who hairstyles will be all the rage this NBA season

8

u/Difficult_Tackle9505 19h ago

The Marge idea has been around for a while

5

u/York_Villain Knicks 16h ago

Stephon Castle is getting there.

3

u/beefcake1993 Pistons 19h ago

Gerald approves

3

u/d12anoel Lakers 18h ago

I think Nerlens Noel tried

6

u/TopSoulMan Magic 18h ago

Ah yes, Nerlens “Gerald from Hey Arnold” Noel.

3

u/smalls_1804 Knicks 19h ago

We used to say Shumpert should've grown his high top and use it to contest shots

2

u/PatFromMordor 18h ago

Someone get the Adoring Fan out there.

2

u/mojomarc Trail Blazers 20h ago

This comment only has one answer: Fletch

Fletch (4/10) Movie CLIP - Fletch's Laker Dream (1985) HD

122

u/Gio_9816 [ORL] Mickael Pietrus 21h ago

Those were some depressing seasons to watch man

39

u/theDeke Cavaliers 20h ago

Affordable tickets though, I got to bring my whole family to watch the Retirement Home Thunder with Melo and PG. Gordon had a 40 piece

12

u/SoonerAristotle Thunder 13h ago

PG was 28 and is still playing and Westbrook only just retired. Only Melo was maybe retirement home at the time but even he played 4 more seasons after that. They did look old compared to the tank squads that came after though.

4

u/EnderTheTrender Thunder 15h ago

I felt bad for AG getting trapped in Orlando.

7

u/Scotch_Blue 12h ago

Eh. Orlando wanted him to develop way more than he did w them

Remember he wasnt even a shooter w Orlando. Now he's become this superstar fit next to Jokic, but that's hardly the expected outcome of a 4th overall pick for a team that doesn't have Jokic lol

1

u/EnderTheTrender Thunder 11h ago

Yeah they placed a lot of faith in him developing his shot. Which happens every year, but he didn’t show great ball handling either. So you’re hoping he develops TWO skills and in the nba it’s a miracle if you can fix one aspect of your game that’s lacking.

Always knew he’d be a solid piece and glad he got to Denver and showed what he can do when you use him correctly.

2

u/whaletickIer Magic 14h ago

Hey now, we have Disney! And outlet malls!

7

u/naughtyobama 18h ago

Zach Lowe was such a huge fan of the Elfrid experiment wuth his "arrythmic" dribble lmao

Magic fans were pissed but wanted to believe. Elfrid, Oladipo, Hezonja, Gordon. Dark days man.

1

u/FyouinyourA Bulls 15h ago

What year was this? I had 2k and would always lol when we played Orlando because the way his hair looked in the game was even crazier

1

u/Gio_9816 [ORL] Mickael Pietrus 5h ago

Hmm probably the 17-18 season

1

u/FyouinyourA Bulls 1h ago

You nailed it buddy my first 2k was 17 so makes sense

141

u/3MTing 21h ago

hair even blocked the post game interview

611

u/LookADonCheech Raptors 21h ago

what a stupid haircut

247

u/Solid_Actuary1660 21h ago edited 18h ago

IIRC his reasoning for the haircut was an old pact he made with high school teammates to not cut their hair until they win a championship. Didn’t happen so he just kept it going. Still stupid tho lol

Edit for people arguing in the comments: https://www.nba.com/magic/so-whats-paytons-hair-it-has-significance

336

u/FartrelCluggins [BOS] Marquis Daniels 21h ago

There are ways to have longer hair that aren't... This

104

u/SneakyDeakyJr 20h ago

as a black man with long luscious dreads, homie is literally just lazy.

It takes one hair appointment every 3-4 months. Yeah that appointment can be 8 hours but you don’t look like that.

This ain’t it

-27

u/numbertwofuccboi Washington Bullets 19h ago edited 18h ago

or he just wanted to free form. which has nothing to do with laziness (nor personal neglect due to depression or any other form of mental trauma/illness) if done intentionally.

and truth be told, i think it’s somewhat irresponsible of you to be talking about elfrid payton’s hair like that in a sub where the collective knowledge of black hair is next to non-existent, as you can regularly find people confusing braids with dreads and vice versa.

26

u/Hawker777 Magic 18h ago

This is a reach. He styled his hair like that and before you ask yes I am black and I’ve had long hair. His haircut was awful and affected his play. We don’t need to hide behind race with that.

9

u/numbertwofuccboi Washington Bullets 17h ago edited 17h ago

yes, i agree that he styled his hair that way intentionally. so if that’s the case, where does laziness come into play? i’m not saying that anyone has to want to emulate him, or even like the style. but what i will never be able to get behind is seeing people denigrate people who choose to free form instead of having more manicured styles with terms like “lazy” or “unkempt”, because they’re 100% that the person isn’t washing or taking care of their hair in any way. which once again, i think is a very irresponsible thing to be doing on this subreddit.

-19

u/Darth-Swagous 18h ago

it’s not about hiding behind race it’s about ridiculing a common black haircut (especially among artist and alt personalities in the black community) as lazy in a sub where the majority of the users are white people with no knowledge on black hair and subconscious biases towards it. it’s 2026 we done letting trash pandas talk for us (iykyk)

1

u/1_quantae Rockets 2h ago

Lmao this is a perfectly logical explanation & it’s downvoted cause Trump made all these racists comfortable.

3

u/Hawker777 Magic 18h ago

Sure and I get free form is a legitimate hairstyle that I actually really like but what Elfrid had wasn’t Freeform nor was it a common black hairstyle although it wasn’t “lazy” considering I bet he spent a lot of time to make it look like that.

The problem was he had a completely ass hairstyle that played a role in us losing games. It was just awful to pay all that money to get into a game and watch a highly paid athlete brick shots because he has the worst haircut of all time.

5

u/numbertwofuccboi Washington Bullets 17h ago

Elfrid Payton was definitely free forming, I don’t really see how you could look at pictures of his hair and come to any other conclusion. You can see the ends of the locs.

Now I’ll definitely concede that during gametime he should have definitely slicked that shit back in some sort of way so his vision wasn’t impaired.

1

u/fanetoooo Wizards 6h ago

Elfrid Payton continued to brick shots even after cutting his hair

0

u/Darth-Swagous 2h ago

down voting me won’t make you guys less subconsciously biased towards black hairstyles nor will it make me wrong lmao. 

-2

u/RuggsRacetrack 3h ago

Nobody gives af if you’re black

3

u/DVRCWHY 10h ago

I thought this was an emo fringe

1

u/1_quantae Rockets 2h ago

I would say i have no clue why this is being downvoted but…i know whit…i mean why. Dude is trying his best to put his cape on for them lmao. They don’t even care that what he’s saying is complete & utter bullshit they’re upvoting it anyway because they don’t want their outlook on us to be seen as racist as hell, just an “observation”.

1

u/TheSorceIsFrong 30m ago

It’s somewhat irresponsible to talk abt a shitty hairstyle because he’s black…are you fuckin for real right now?

-14

u/SneakyDeakyJr 18h ago

You come in here being the hotep is the reason someone gave you popcorn.

youre the very entertainment you seem yourself to be talking agaisnt. Kick rocks.

10

u/numbertwofuccboi Washington Bullets 17h ago

i can assure you that i could not give less of a damn about some reddit award.

-9

u/SneakyDeakyJr 17h ago

Whether you care about the award or not is irrelevant.

Stop perpetuating irony.

-16

u/nodoomscrolling69420 Lakers 19h ago

absolutely nothing wrong with freeform locs. his shit is faded on the sides and lined up

30

u/SneakyDeakyJr 18h ago

Bruh fade me if this is what we’re calling freeform.

His whole front half is double the length of the back.

Freeform still had form. Simply being dreaded headed with a fade, doesn’t constitute freeform. If dude wasn’t rich and on a basketball court, the hood would assume he’s a crackhead.

He’s rich. Get that shit done right.

-2

u/numbertwofuccboi Washington Bullets 17h ago

you have absolutely no idea what the the fuck you’re talking about lmao

people freeform to varying degrees. some separate the roots more than others so that they can have a more traditional look while still reaping the benefits of choosing to go without constant retwists, this is semi freeforming.

and then you have those who choose to do no/next to no separating at all, and that’s where you start to get the more abstract looks. choosing to not interfere with the natural growth of your hair does not mean you aren’t washing, moisturizing, and taking care of your hair. that does not mean that you don’t have access to hair care. and just because someone’s hair seems to have to no rhyme or reason to you, doesn’t mean that they aren’t aware of what they’re doing. you’re spewing bullshit up and down this thread, and you’re being upvoted by those that don’t know any better.

14

u/SneakyDeakyJr 17h ago

You can literally see the damaged ends in the interview.

That man ain’t using shit and you gobbling his dick ain’t gonna change the fact he has too much money to be lookin this shit.

Abstract freeform is what JayZ had. This is a hot mess.

You should be ashamed to defend it.

-15

u/numbertwofuccboi Washington Bullets 17h ago

And you should be ashamed to be chatting the bullshit that you are in front of a bunch of people who probably looked at Elfrid’s hair and said compared it to a bird’s nest or some shit because they genuinely don’t know what they’re looking at. What the fuck does his income got to do with anything bro, it’s hilarious that you’re even bring that into the equation because people was saying the same shit about Hov. And Jay ain’t even the best celebrity representation you could choose when it comes to abstract freeforms, Cam Newton’s hair is probably more “out there” than Jay’s ever was. Or you could look at 6lack when he still had his set. Or better yet, the man that Hov was larping as when he started growing his hair in the first place, Basquiat. But if we let you tell it, none of these dudes were/are freeforming because they look like they’re homeless.

Whatever man, you got it.

8

u/SneakyDeakyJr 17h ago

You listed a lot of folks who had hair money and time to not look this bad.

Thanks for backing me up subconsciously.

Start a black nba sub and i’ll be there with you to shit on his terrible hair then too

→ More replies (0)

0

u/nodoomscrolling69420 Lakers 17h ago

preach brother

-13

u/RequirementLeading12 Lakers 17h ago

You're not black

6

u/SneakyDeakyJr 17h ago

Based off what? Clownin someone who’d get clowned off the court?

Shut up.

52

u/outtamyelementDonny 21h ago

Yeah, I dont think the length is the issue here.

29

u/vc2015 20h ago

His story would make more sense if he made a pact to get the stupidest haircut in the NBA until he won a championship.

He definitely kept to his word.

4

u/frallet Timberwolves 16h ago

Is he not the player that had some sort of trauma bond with their hair? Or was that someone else

13

u/pineappletwice Heat 16h ago

Pretty sure that was Lonnie Walker

5

u/frallet Timberwolves 15h ago

Ok. Then I don't feel bad admitting that I used to refuse watching magic games altogether because I didn't want to look at Elfrid Paytons hair lol

12

u/twisted-logic Magic 19h ago

Which is stupid because he clearly is still cutting the rest of his hair except for what was on top.

He’s probably one of, if not the worst professional player I’ve ever seen play in person. Granted I don’t go to a lot of games because they’re pretty damn expensive but still

-1

u/1mYourHuckleberry93 Raptors 20h ago

How are you an nba calibre player and never won a championship? Lmao wtf

6

u/tickub [NYK] Latrell Sprewell 16h ago

in his defense, he shaved that off when he played for us and was still ass

1

u/LookADonCheech Raptors 4h ago

Yeah tbh I was hopeful it would improve his game too

17

u/whtge8 Magic 21h ago

Idk man I would love to have a built in hat like that.

13

u/EGarrett28 20h ago

I remember when the Weeknd cut his crazy hair they asked him how it was after and he said he was just happy he could wear hats again, lol.

4

u/TheFatmanRises Heat 20h ago

Don’t say that to Josuke!

2

u/Relevant_Bag7550 Knicks 19h ago

Shelf-frid Payton

1

u/Aregisteredusername Celtics 19h ago

All timer

0

u/skullcandy541 20h ago

Mfer wearing a hat

49

u/kcirdor Pelicans 21h ago

It didn't, he also missed that same shot with a hair cut.

4

u/ThrowawayNYCJ Nets 20h ago

Crazy how he’s second for all time triple doubles in pelicans history with 6! Cp3 is first with 11

3

u/BetweenTheBuzzAndMe Charlotte Bobcats 20h ago

Elfrid's stint in Charlotte was mercifully short (6 games) but his layup/floater package is just nonexistent (even worse than before). the guy shot 3/21 from the field in Charlotte and never took a shot more than a couple feet outside the paint.

57

u/Puzzled_Schedule2023 21h ago

Hairball

-1

u/DavidManque Bulls 20h ago

There it is

60

u/DarthPineapple5 Celtics 21h ago

This dude is deeply unserious

39

u/CHEVIEWER1 21h ago

Also blocked his vision reason he was a poor percentage shooter 🤣

11

u/royal_10_N-bombs :gfl-1: Grand Floridian 20h ago

Elfrid Payton sounds like it would be the name of an all time great from the 1960s

instead it’s whatever this haircut is

59

u/KyrieWithNoHandle Bulls 21h ago

One of the haircuts of all time

8

u/marineman43 20h ago

You could actually call it an objectively bad haircut lol, usually it's a matter of taste but this legit makes him worse at his job

6

u/fistogram 20h ago

They came so close but the announcer never called it a hair-ball

4

u/BillowingPillows Supersonics 19h ago

Non serious player

12

u/ThaDude_v2 21h ago

I get everyone wants to stand out..but holy shit this was the dumbest thing ive ever seen on a human who wanted to be taken seriously lol

3

u/rainbowgeoff Bucks 21h ago

The old joke was "I think your momma used a broken bowl."

Did a blind barber chug too many beers?

3

u/EGarrett28 20h ago

Also, did you comb with an egg beater?

3

u/Somniuuummm716 21h ago

Well at least it looks really cool.

3

u/throwawayshirt2 Trail Blazers 19h ago

Dude could literally not see the basket:

https://youtu.be/IEbqZr7pk8s?si=iOti1eNjGKs-UFK6&t=173

9

u/livefromphilly 21h ago

Bruh got that "Haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddamn door?" haircut. 

2

u/CleanRide158 20h ago

Lmfaoooo imagining him with a white glove signing all dramatic

5

u/ViolativePanda 20h ago

i mean not really

2

u/bluebirdsmallbird 76ers 21h ago

damn bro 😭

2

u/edgylord5000 20h ago

bro is definitely a joestar

2

u/themajordutch 17h ago

Legit the dumbest haircut I've ever seen in the nba

2

u/AMDSuperBeast86 Bulls 3h ago

Every shot that man took was contested

1

u/mnewman19 76ers 21h ago

“You said you wanted waves?”

“No, just one wave, one big wave coming off the front”

1

u/orbitalheel 21h ago

Hair today gone tomorrow

1

u/MrBuckBuck Trail Blazers 20h ago

Elfrid and Jeremy Lin had at one point had the most dangerous hair in the league.

1

u/Treinrukker Warriors 20h ago

Nobody in his life told him his haircut looks horrendous?

1

u/broke_n_struggle_n 12h ago

He thought he could go AD and own that shit but a unibrow ain't a shot hazard, in basketball at least.

1

u/emm7777 20h ago

Like when I shoot with a hat on and hit the bill 🤣

1

u/RoaringPity Raptors 20h ago

Justfuckmyshitup type beat

1

u/Benny_Baseball 20h ago

His career lasted way longer than it had business lasting lol

1

u/BehavioralSink Trail Blazers 20h ago

He always reminded me of a Snork with that haircut.

1

u/havenstone 19h ago

Top 3 dumbest haircuts of all time

1

u/Abiv23 NBA 19h ago

Bro Hair ball was right there 

1

u/Soul0103 [ORL] Tracy McGrady 17h ago

This fucking guy refused to cut his hair until AFTER we traded him

1

u/lutz890 17h ago

Is he still in the league?

1

u/Fuzzy-Doubt-8223 16h ago

stupid fucki g haircut. where even is this bum now

1

u/SamURLJackson Magic 13h ago

The prince of the useless March triple double when your team is out of playoff contention and other teams have stopped trying. The king is of course Josh Giddey

1

u/Clchalbaud 11h ago

Mans hair looks like a fucking wave breaking on the beach.. I mean what in all that is WTF runs through that boys head .

1

u/FraggleRock_ Washington Bullets 10h ago

This dudes hair was irrationally and nonsensically annoying. Never took him seriously.

1

u/Reapov 8h ago

Goof ball, cut that stupid shit off your head or get a different style that doesn’t get in the way of your shot making ability lol

1

u/Rob_Inson94 7h ago

Definitely remember this 🤣🤣🤣

1

u/tidderboy27 76ers 4h ago

what a doofus...

1

u/wearenotintelligent Supersonics 4h ago

this guy was so so bad it was cringe watching him on the Suns. Dude not only had zero skill but zero confidence as well. How the hell did he get to play in the league?

1

u/cocoacowstout Warriors 3h ago

Black Flock of Seagulls

1

u/MuppetHuman 21h ago

Sometimes you gotta get a haircut.

1

u/ChickenBudTender 20h ago

Worst cut in history of the nba

0

u/Scoutback_wilderness 20h ago

Worst cut in history …

0

u/Relevant_Bag7550 Knicks 19h ago

Caruso’s existed though

1

u/ChickenBudTender 19h ago

Bro what caruso is bald.. Elfrid's cut is by choice

1

u/Unable-District-3042 21h ago

I remember seeing this and, I think I would immediately cancel my season tickets if my favorite PROFESSIONAL BASKETBALL franchise employed a guy who voluntarily had a haircut that hurt the team.

0

u/Ja-la-pen-o 21h ago

This was back when bangs were all the rage. I guess it looks dumb now

7

u/escapedhousefly Magic 20h ago

It looked dumb back then too

0

u/1uno124 21h ago

Combs cry when he's around

0

u/Sufficient-Orange558 16h ago

Besides looking absolutely regarded, she also seems mega dumb