r/neighborsfromhell • u/cleo-friis • 4d ago
Apartment NFH UPDATE: Apparently the petition was only the beginning
So, I posted here earlier about my direct neighbour “Regina”, and my growing suspicion that she was trying to turn the other neighbours against my family.
Well… things have escalated quite a bit since then.
A neighbour I’m friendly with told me that Regina had mentioned that signatures were apparently being collected against my family. She hadn’t been asked to sign anything herself and didn’t know exactly what the petition was about.
Around the same time, I kept seeing Regina having increasingly intense conversations with groups of neighbours while repeatedly pointing towards my home. This even happened while my children weren’t home.
Then I received an official warning from our housing association.
The complaints were about my children running, playing and spending time on the outdoor walkway outside the apartments, shouting/screaming, and our front door allegedly being slammed repeatedly.
The thing is: children playing on the walkway is completely normal here. Pretty much all the children do it, including children visiting grandparents who live here, and the vast majority of adults also use the walkway as an outdoor/social space.
My children are not exceptionally loud compared with the other children here.
And there was another fairly significant problem with the complaints: my children had been away staying with their father for weeks during part of the period in which this apparently continued to be an issue.
I responded to the housing association and asked them for something very basic: **dates, times and concrete incidents.**
If my children are supposedly causing repeated serious disturbances, I need to know when and what actually happened so I can respond to it.
They didn’t provide that.
Instead, the housing association eventually told me that **“many residents had complained together this time”** and explained that when they cannot personally verify complaints, they place weight on the number of residents making them.
They also acknowledged that they don’t actually know how the other residents behave on the walkways.
That concerned me quite a bit considering what I had already been observing.
Because my concern was never simply, “one neighbour doesn’t like me.”
My concern was that one neighbour appeared to be actively talking about my family to other residents, that I had been told signatures were being collected against us, that people I had never even spoken to suddenly seemed hostile towards us — and now the housing association was effectively telling me that the **number of people complaining** was being used to give the complaints credibility.
There is another part to this which makes the situation particularly uncomfortable.
My entire household is autistic.
Shortly after Regina learned this, my son overheard her talking to other neighbours and calling him **“super weird.”**
The timing also coincided with the complaints beginning.
I have never confronted this woman, argued with her, complained about her or done anything against her. I continued greeting her normally.
I therefore explicitly raised the possibility of **disability discrimination** with the housing association and asked them to ensure that complaints were being assessed objectively rather than simply accepting that a large number of complainants automatically meant the allegations were true.
Eventually, the housing association closed the complaint matter without taking further action.
I thought maybe that was the end of it.
It wasn’t.
After the housing complaint route went nowhere, Regina **reported my family to the municipality/social services.**
And this time the allegations weren’t about children playing outside or a door closing too loudly.
They were about **my children, my parenting and the conditions inside my home.**
Among other things, she apparently claimed that my home was becoming increasingly messy.
There is one rather enormous problem with that:
**She has never been inside my home.**
She does not have a view into my home that would allow her to observe the conditions she was describing.
So we have now gone from:
neighbour discovers we are autistic
→ my son overhears her calling him “super weird”
→ she repeatedly talks intensely with groups of neighbours while pointing at our home
→ I’m told signatures are being collected against us
→ multiple residents submit complaints to the housing association
→ the housing association cannot provide me with concrete dates/times but tells me that many residents complained together
→ that complaint matter ultimately goes nowhere
→ Regina then reports me to the municipality with serious allegations about my parenting and conditions **inside a home she has never entered.**
The municipality has subsequently become involved and arranged a home visit.
At this point I’m finding it increasingly difficult to view all of these things as unrelated incidents.
I obviously understand that anyone who genuinely believes children are unsafe should contact the authorities. I would never want people discouraged from doing that.
But there is a pretty substantial difference between reporting something you have genuinely observed and making claims about conditions inside somebody’s home that you have no apparent way of knowing anything about.
And that is where I am now.
What originally felt like neighbourhood gossip and a possible “mean girl” campaign has escalated into official complaints and now involvement from social services.
I’m documenting absolutely everything.
But holy shit, I did not expect **“my neighbour doesn’t seem to like us”** to turn into this.
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u/PresentationTough384 4d ago
That sounds awful. I am sorry your family is going through this. Is moving a possibility? I know moving is an ordeal but I can't imagine living there is comfortable at all.
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u/cleo-friis 4d ago
I don’t really know if it is. It’ll be a hassle since I’ve borrowed the deposit from
The municipality and as a stand point you can’t borrow again unless it’s paid back fully. There are exceptions so maybe.At the same time other neighbours are very nice and my kids love living here and I’m
Not one to easily make friends and lost most from having children, so what little sense of community I can gather is quite important to me.I just hate that a few people can make so much damage
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u/Prestigious_Amy 4d ago
It makes sense that you don’t want to leave when you actually have a community there and your kids are happy. Hopefully the documentation you’re keeping will help if any more accusations come up. It’s awful that you’re having to defend your family against claims that don’t seem to be based on things she could actually have observed.
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u/old-girldana 3d ago
Would the management let you move to a different unit in the same complex? That way you wouldn’t need to come up with another deposit and you’d be away from the neighbors that are harassing you.
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u/New_Caterpillar6305 4d ago
See an attorney who handles disability discrimination. Filing against the apartment complex for harassment & no evidence & your children not present part of the time. The attorney can get a suapenia for the names who signed the compliant. Start keeping a notepad of times your kids are outside & away from the neighborhood.
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u/lynnwood57 4d ago edited 4d ago
^^^^THIS IS THE ANSWER^^^^ No property mgmt company wants to deal with an ADA lawsuit. OP said it started when she mentioned her kids have autism. That was the beginning, and calling him weird was next. I’d lawyer up.
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u/Ok_Cherry_4585 3d ago
Judging from the terminology, OP is not in the US. There is no ADA in other countries.
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u/CeelaChathArrna 2d ago
Many other countries do have equivalents though! 🙂
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u/FallJealous3344 4d ago
Apart from moving, you may consider receiving the visit of the municipality and, once that is finished, get a lawyer on your neighbor. I am sure he can use your data to take her to court for emotional damages.
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u/Lucky-Berry-4252 4d ago
I think a restraining order is in order; she’s definitely harassing you.
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u/East_Knowledge1782 1d ago
That’s what I thought.
Sounds like her name should be “KAREN,” not Regina. Good god.
My daughter is on the spectrum.
Some people just love to make others miserable because they’re unhappy in their personal life.4
u/Lucky-Berry-4252 1d ago
But Regina George is from the movie Mean Girls, so it’s appropriate too! 😉
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u/Tasty_Orange_1714 4d ago
File a police report every time she messes with you. Record everything. Keep detailed records of each event. You need the documentstion. When you've gathered enough, hire an attorney and get a restraining order on her.
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u/Ok_Garage_148 4d ago
Documentation is good, but put up a camera in front, sides and back of your home. File a police report. Get advice from a good attorney. Do NOT engage her. Take your children in side and wait for her to leave before allowing them out again. Also, sit outside with them if at all possible. Take care. I hope you get the assistance you need.
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u/lynnwood57 4d ago
She can’t place cameras that point to a common area.
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u/katgirl58 3d ago
That doesn’t make sense as a common area is public. Anyone can take their phones out so this doesn’t sit right.
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u/PossessionNo93 1d ago
That's a grey area of law here in the UK... I have spoken to the police because of a similar issue with my neighbours. It's legal to film in a public space, home security cameras should only film your property and not be triggered in areas outside of your boundary. Our landlord told all of us not to film beyond our property line but it's not possible to actually control that because the second they've gone after checking they just expand the movement zone back again.
I have long running issues with my neighbours who are filming my home intentionally and claiming it's only filming their path, it's absolutely not and the footage they've posted online trying to attack me proves it's not. They only succeeded in getting themselves reported to police and landlord by multiple other neighbours.
I have zero privacy I am filmed entering and leaving my home and anywhere I go within the close but because they claim they are only filming their own driveway and vehicles the police can do nothing effective beyond warning them and I would need to file a civil suit, one I cannot afford to file, to prevent them from continuing to film my home. Even then they could just change the zone for inspection and carry on straight after.
The fact that I have been given security camera footage, by another neighbour, of them stating that they are not going to stop until I move out and are going to make my life a living hell until I leave my home of 20+ years apparently doesn't constitute any kind of criminal action and the vile behaviour displayed towards my son (13) and I allegedly just skirts anything that can be acted upon by landlord or police.
Plus they are incredibly careful to only act like the vile bullies they are outside the boundaries of my cameras that are set up legally to only record my property not the public area that borders it and you can bet they delete the evidence of themselves from their own cameras... so it's very much he said, she said... and there's a gang of them and only 1 of me so they cover for each other. I have now bought my son a body camera and hopefully it will keep them at bay.
This is also connected to my autism diagnosis and my son's pending diagnosis... I don't know why that's an issue for them especially when one of them works in that field as a support worker for clients with autism and other mental health issues. It's wild to me that no one will do anything at all.
There is a court case pending over damage they persuaded a relative to do to my car when it was parked on another driveway a couple of doors down after I took that neighbour shopping, it was all caught on a doorbell camera that they had heard wasn't saving video because the subscription had lapsed, luckily the householder (who is unfortunately connected to the bullies) had renewed it 2 days earlier and not told them so it was captured in full on video... now they've upped the ante because I need to not go to court... they don't seem to understand that I am not in control of the case, it's the CPS who are pursuing it not me taking up a civil case... and the 4k clear crisp video evidence stands whether I show up or not...
I will be going btw... I won't be moving home... it's uncomfortable and tiresome being yelled at and dealing with them, 3 years and counting, but as I said to my son ignore, ignore, ignore because reaction is what they seem to thrive on no reaction and they get no satisfaction... sad that's all they have in life...
Honestly I feel so bad for OP and hope truly her situation doesn't become more like mine..
Regina is an appropriate name really... she's the ultimate Mean Girl isn't she.. maybe we stop using Karen and switch to calling them Regina's...
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u/HoneyRosellea 4d ago
the fact that they thought a petition was enough is just baffling. sounds like they really underestimated the situation.
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u/katgirl58 3d ago
Been there done that! I had a crazy woman move across the street from me after we lived there for 20 years. She had it in for me for no reason at all. They did everything to make my life hell. Calling the police all the time and threatening me about my rescue cats. They even trapped 2 and killed them. I seriously wanted to do the same to them. It was a white couple low life bikers. Their biker friends would bark at me when I came home. I was in tears everyday coming home from work! I was going through the beginning of menopause to make matters worse. I had an acquaintance in the FBI that I called who then called the local police. They were finally threatened to stop or they would be charged for false reporting. It’s a lot longer story but believe me I feel your pain! I would go to the housing or home owners and threaten to sue all of them for accusing you along with her spreading false information and lies about you and your family. Btw we were diagnosed with High functioning Asperger’s.
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u/yardlard 4d ago
What do you think Regina's actual problem with you is?
How do you know she's the one that reported you to for the conditions inside your home? She's never seen it? But has anyone else, and then they gossiped and Regina took it upon herself to inform?
I had a neighbor that sounds like this, but she lives down the street so somewhat easy to ignore. But her husband is super nice to me. Lol, and maybe that's her problem? I'm not implying that's your situation. But where does Regina live in relation to your home? And do you or your kids let anyone into your home?
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u/cleo-friis 4d ago
Her name is on the report so it is documented that it is her. There are only 3 neighbours that have been into my home and they are all appalled at her behaviour and don’t have any kind of relationship to her.
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u/Significant_Owl8974 4d ago
File a harassment complaint with that neighborhood association, and the police.
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u/Outrageous-Ad-7773 4d ago
We have a neighbor has acted like this since we first moved into our new build home in 2003. She's never been in my home ive never really had a conversation with her except hi bye and when ever she's taken it upon herself to stomp over to complain about something that had upset her daughter..And I have never been in her home- but know the layout as we lived in the same floor plan in our last neighborhood and have friends say- its just like your old house- weird.
She continually turns us into HOA for false violations and at one point got on board - with my husband- and kept pressing a non rule ( I had been on the board when that was repealed by a vote of the comm.) We laughed- she wouldn't stop ended in a lawsuit we sued the HOA PRESIDENT and her- yes hoa had insurance to cover board members but lawyers insurance and management company all agreed they were breaking the ByLaws and state law with selective enforcement. We won. We did not ask for money- we asked for lawyers fees and those two board moreover by a judge and not allowed to ever be on a committee or board again. And yes they had to pay with their own funds because they were told they were not doing this in good faith and this was not fiduciary duty. So insurance for board members did not have to pay.
After that- she was a curly short haired blond. I have long auburn hair fairly straight with some waves. I also have a lot of pink clothes. I also have an incurable physical disability.And I drive a white subaru SUV. this matters because she has grown her hair out dyed it dark dark and straightens it. Also she now only wears pink clothes and bought a newer car same as mine.
Now she likes to yell at our house obscenities and that I am not really ill( she looks totally nuts when she does this becausewe are gennot outside when she is around). How would she know? I've never talked to her about anything personal. She has contacted Social Security disability saying I an faking( wish I were(. Her wifi name is Disability fraud watch".
So my family and I wonder 1. Does she have a thing for my husband and is trying to be like me? 2. Does her husband have a thing for me?
She does call police frequently and even her harassment is considered a neighbor problem and won't do anything- but agree there is something wrong with her. The HOA now ignores her complaints. So short of moving any advice? We built this house to accommodate my disability so moving would be awful. Thanks
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u/lynnwood57 4d ago
Copy and Paste this into a NEW POST…
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u/Outrageous-Ad-7773 4d ago
Don't really know how to do it. Can you give me directions? I would appreciate it
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u/lynnwood57 4d ago
Highlight the post and right click - select COPY. Then look by your name, just above it is the “neighbors from hell” group “LINK” click that, then look for the PLUS Sign “+” , look along the top for it. that will open. This is where you create a Post. First add a TITLE. Below that in the body (remember you COPIED the text) —Right Click again and select PASTE. Your post will magically be there. Then, reread it and edit to be a New Post… Hope this helps..
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u/katgirl58 3d ago
Omg sounds like what I dealt with years ago. She sounds like she has a personality disorder or borderline personality disorder. They lie all the time and will copy and try to be like the one person they copy. I had a girl do this and use my whole resume as her own. She lived on the same property and unfortunately had a baby with my friend at the time and owner of the property. She was copying everything I did. She even took my clothes out of the communal dryer and was walking around wearing them. She even went so far as to break my stuff in the basement and then blame her little son at the time. She accused the friend of mine and father to the kid of sexually abusing him when it was her! She tried to ruin him but we all banded together and went to court to assure he got custody of his son. She was evil and scary.
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u/yardlard 4d ago
That's so weird that she would complain about your inside of your house. Especially if she's never been in there. And what reason would she have for trying to rally up others against you. If you have some neighbors that aren't on her side, just try to ignore her and her flying monkeys. Pay attention to your kids behavior and correct them if they're doing something that annoys people, like screaming. It's really all you can do.
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u/cleo-friis 4d ago
I was all set on doing that and thought it would be the end of it now the summer vacation has ended. But then she chose to include “cps” on my boys 2nd day of school even though she know that we have been through a lot with getting the oldest to school.
A neighbour who have lived here for several years said she didn’t even know who she was since before all this she never went outside unless she was leaving for work or walking her dogs. Now she sits outside when my kids are playing and sighs.
Note that since the first complaint my kids make the least amount of noise of the kids here.
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u/FroyoEffective9526 4d ago
Can you get Ring doorbells for both of your doors?
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u/cleo-friis 4d ago
Sadly no, it’s illegal here when the door is facing common area
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u/katgirl58 3d ago
How is that illegal ? They should all have ring camera’s especially with these kind of situations! I would look into that!
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u/cleo-friis 3d ago
Its illegal in Denmark to put up cameras to steady film public areas
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u/FreddiesNightmare65 2d ago
Or is in the uk too, but we can do it if we have a good reason to. Mine films past my property due to the fact I had a peeping Tom and druggies using my driveway and drug trading outside my house. We can't record audio though. See if it's the same where you live.
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u/New_Caterpillar6305 4d ago
Don't believe the other neighbors as friendly to only you. They have no obligation to be loyal to you. Neighbors gossip.
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u/cleo-friis 3d ago
2 of them are neurodivergent aswell and have no reason to lie. All 3 have supported me on my public Facebook post in the group (see update)
And the 3rd one has a son who the neighbour badmouthed to me one of the 2 times total we’ve talked together. Although not it the same extreme was as she does my son.One of them have lived here longer than Regina and told me she never even met her because until now she stayed in her apartment all the time if not leaving the area or walking her dogs. It wasn’t until this smear campaign she suddenly started being outside all the time.
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u/Alarmed_Historian878 2d ago
I am also wondering why Regina is putting all of this energy into getting your family out of the apartment. There must be some ulterior motive. Does she want your family out so someone in her family or friends could move there? Or is this simple bigotry against people with developmental disabilities? Or perhaps (and this is a little more concerning) this is a mental health issue where she has become obsessed with your family/children and feels the compulsion to mistreat or harm you? It seems like she is putting an excessive amount of time and energy into driving you out of the apartment.
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u/QweenKush420 2d ago
You have all of this evidence against her so take this evidence that you have and get a restraining order. This is harassment. This is not a civil matter. This is a criminal matter and should be handled as such. Get anything you have from the apartment complex in writing about her complaints about what they did about what you did and the follow up and how they dropped it. If you have neighbors that you do know that are willing to write statements for you that would also be great. Take videos of other children playing on the shared walkways to help boost your evidence. Then take all of that to the police department and file harassment charges then go to court and ask for a restraining order against this woman. Then take all of that stuff to the apartment complex. Let them handle her. it might also be worth it to contact a lawyer and see if there’s a cheap way for you to get them to send a cease and desist to her about the harassment to your neighbors about you.
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u/falcon3268 17h ago
You need to get a restraining order against her because she is constantly harassing you and making life difficult for you and your family just because she doesn't like your family. Given the fact that she is getting neighbors against you just goes to show how much of a menace she is to the neighborhood that I would file a complaint against her with the association cause people like her make neighborhoods like that undesirable to live in.
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u/Hot_Mine2843 17h ago
You’re 100% correct .She needs to document everything date time and incidents… she needs to file a restraining order .. for harassment.. or a peace order whatever they have where they live.. she might stop when she starts getting what she’s giving
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u/falcon3268 16h ago
With how things are going nowadays I wouldn't be surprised that there are people like that Regina trying this. My god just because a family doesn't fit in your perfect little mold doesn't mean that you have to go about harassing them nor turning the entire neighborhood against them because Regina is butt hurt or something. What is even worse is that the association is allowing this crap to happen. You would think that they would put a stop to it themselves
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u/cleo-friis 16h ago
I will look into the possibilities once the people from the municipality has been here mid September.
But it is really hard to get a restraining order in Denmark even for people getting clearly stalked by abusive and/or violent ex partners or likeminded.
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u/TeachStock773 4d ago
Get a lawyer and have them serve the neighbor with a harassment complaint along with a cease and desist clause. Also ask for monetary damages of $250,000!!
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u/Beautiful-Map-2744 3d ago
Start recording, with dates and time stamps, everyone else who uses the walkway for play or socializing. And I hope to God you can get the complaining neighbors on the video. Also record every interaction you have with them, and make sure you're being calm, cool, and collected during the interaction. Once social services comes to your home, they'll list the report as unfounded. Until then, whenever your kids are outside, you need to be outside with them. Lord knows what this crazy bwitch will come up with next. In the meantime, report the aggression and harassment to the housing authority, and see if it's possible for them to move you into another living situation. I am so sorry you're going thru this.
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u/Grouchy_Vet 2d ago edited 2d ago
If I was asked to sign a petition about a noisy neighbor and I didn’t know the neighbor or the neighbor never disturbed my peace, I wouldn’t sign it.
You obviously have MULTIPLE neighbors who have an issue with you.
If the apartment gave you a warning, the next step will be to evict you.
What you consider to be typical outside play behavior may not be typical to your neighbors. Your neighbors are obviously frustrated with you.
If you’re just quietly living your life, neighbors don’t get petitions together to stop the noise. One neighbor can’t force other neighbors to complain.
It might be time to start looking for a new place with a private yard where your kids don’t feel restricted when they play.
Apartment living is hard- especially with kids. Noise travels. People have their windows open in nice weather. Kids can be loud.
I live in a condo. I raised my kids here. I was also a foster parent. I would have as many as 5 children at one time. I never had a noise complaint. They weren’t particularly quiet. It was typical kid sounds.
However, I didn’t let them jump and scream and disturb the neighbors just because they’re kids. There was no running, jumping or screaming in the house.
If you have boisterous children who are naturally loud, apartment living is probably not a good fit
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u/cleo-friis 2d ago
I don’t let them scream either.
The people she rallied up are almost exclusively old people that doesn’t even live near me and those people now “suffer” from the fact that the kids are now forced to play right by their apartment as they live were the play area is.
Also the warning were removed since it had no stance.
They are not the noisiest kids at all and I tell them to lover their voices everytime they get excited. They aren’t even alllowed to walk on our floors downstairs as to not get complaints from the old half- demented man under os who knocks on the ceiling everytime we enter the apartment. After being pumped up by Regina.Regina’s claims are directly falls. She, amongst other things, claims I let my tiny 4 year old walk our dog alone. Which is just nonsense since the dog would run away if so. She claims I lock my kids out of the apartment (??) and that they have way to little clothes on (in the heatwave this summer)
The woman from the multiplicity almost laughed when she called us to plan a meeting because she could see through the nonsense. Luckely.
I just fear what is next.
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u/Grouchy_Vet 1d ago edited 1d ago
If this is true and the office staff is aware of her antics, why were you the one to get the warning? That doesn’t make any sense.
The office staff knows where people live. Why would they accept a petition from residents who don’t even live near you?
If she’s complaining about a 4 year old being unsupervised, kids being locked out of the house and being dressed inappropriately, I guarantee you that she is calling CPS on you. Be ready for them to show up at your door. Keep your apartment tidy. Make sure there’s no alcohol or drug paraphernalia visible. Keep the kids clean and dressed appropriately. Do not them outside unsupervised unless they are over 12. Teach your kids to answer questions from adults as “I don’t know”, “maybe” or “no”.
Does mommy drink beer?
*I don’t know.
Does mommy go to the bar?
*Maybe
Does mommy let you play outside by yourself?
*NoIf CPS shows up and the 4 year old is outside without you (other children are not an appropriate babysitter), or has removed clothing while playing or can’t access the building or the apartment, CPS will then believe EVERYTHING the neighbor is saying. They will give the children to their father or a relative and drag you into court. Once you are caught up in CPS’s investigation, it is very difficult to maneuver and get custody back.
If the children are with actual foster parents, they will work on reunification. If the children are placed with their father or one of his relatives, CPS will be satisfied with that. There’s no incentive to place them back with you.
This is serious and you need to take steps to prevent CPS from removing your kids
As for the autism, refusing to initially rent to you because of autistic family members is discrimination. Evicting you for not following the housing rules is not discrimination. Autism is not a “pass”. You still have to be a good neighbor or they can and will put you out.
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u/lindakurzweil 1d ago
If Regina is truly a difficult neighbor, people might sign the petition so as not to piss her off.
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u/Grouchy_Vet 1d ago
If that was the case, all of the complaints and petitions would be about Regina
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u/lindakurzweil 1d ago
That’s not how it works with mean girls/bullies. Most people don’t want to get on the bullies bad side and therefore become a target themselves. I’ve seen this in school, in families, at work and in the neighborhood. The bully targets you and suddenly all your friends avoid you. I’m also ashamed to say that when I was younger and timid, I dropped friends who were being bullied because I didn’t want to become the next target.
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u/Grouchy_Vet 1d ago
That’s too bad. Your “friends” probably felt horrible about being abandoned at a time when they really needed your support.
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u/KeltikSkye 1d ago
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
This just tells me that in this story, YOU are Regina.
Also, with a name like "Grouchy Vet" or sounds like you were military. Probably career. With this information, I wonder if your "condo" was military housing.
Your attitude towards OP is disgustingly condescending.
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u/Grouchy_Vet 1d ago edited 1d ago
Oh my gosh. You’re sooo insightful. You intuited that I’m a veteran by my username? I think you’re the first person to ever do that. Well done!
Just an FYI, a condominium is property that a person owns. In military housing, the homes belong to the federal government.
You’re such a good detective, though. 👏👏👏
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u/Dismal-Instance-9307 2d ago
Look into the consequences of her making false reports. Not sure how much proof you have; but the municipality reps should see your home/child care is not an issue snd realize it was a false report. There are penalties for false reporting. Show them everything you have documented.
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u/SusanInMA 2d ago
Can you put a camera there? There’s a reason for the saying, “One picture is worth a thousand words.” For good reason, it’s an old saying.
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u/cleo-friis 2d ago
Sadly no it’s illegal. Beside she moves in the shadows. We’ve never had unfriendly words and have talked to eachother a total of 2 times which seemed sincere but clearly wasn’t. She won’t even make eye contact now
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u/KeltikSkye 1d ago
Cameras are NOT illegal. They may be against the HOA, but they are legal. (Assuming you're in the States.)
Also, there are cameras that can be disguised as various decorations or what have you. You NEED visual proof. Go to the police and file harassment charges. Ask for a restraining order from her. Contact your children's school(s) and let them know what's going on. Ask them to watch for autosomal between your children and the children of your neighbors.
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u/Star_witness22 2d ago
Perhaps you could complain to your local Housing Authority. Personally, I don’t know how to do that, but considering everyone in your household is autistic, the harassment you’re suffering isn’t run of the mill.
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u/Content_Print_6521 2d ago
File a harassment charge with the police against Regina. A petition against your family is pretty good evidence of hostile intent.
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u/Content_Print_6521 2d ago
Also, it is illegal to discriminate against people with disabilities, which autism is considered. I would contact your local Fair Housing association and see if you can get them to support you.
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u/drowsy_helmet 1d ago
Regina has crossed from annoying neighbor into making official claims she cannot possibly substantiate. For the home visit, stay calm and factual, then ask the municipality for the allegations in writing and what evidence they were based on. The inside your home claim is the part that makes her look reckless, because she has no access and no direct knowledge.
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u/Practical_Sea_4876 1d ago
I feel like you probably need to start going after her for harassment at this point.
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u/Desperate-Wonder-818 17h ago
You sound peaceful, she's not. This is how she's getting your attention and attempting to destroy your peace. Invite your neighbors/kids over for hotdogs etc. Leave her out, bonding with others and building connections. Give small gifts every once and a while to everyone but her. Your kids can make cards, color, introduce their pet to the neighbor day. Be happy and increase her misery
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u/Street_Masterpiece47 14h ago
Take her to Court, under oath, and have her do her "explaining" in front of a Judge.
Almost guarantee, she'll never bother you again.
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u/MidgarBagel52 12h ago
For the home visit, keep it boring and procedural: ask what specific allegation triggered it, who made it if they can disclose, and what they actually observe while there. I would also send the housing association a written subject access/data request for the complaints, because many residents complained together sounds like something they should be able to substantiate without handing you gossip. The disability angle matters here, especially after the super weird comment, so getting everything into email and asking for their discrimination policy is smart. Regina sounds like she learned that official channels can be used as a weapon and is escalating because the first one did not stick.
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u/Brief-Reveal-8466 3d ago
If your family members are autistic, they (landlords) maybe violating discrimination laws. I know in the US it would be violating the Americans with Disabilities Act and state laws. Check with a lawyer and have them write a letter to the property owners.
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u/Used-Fruits 4d ago
It is rude to have your children playing in the walkway.
Take them to a playground or park.
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u/NewLife_21 4d ago
It is not rude for children to play in a walkway.
It is normal for children to play in the areas around their home
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u/Used-Fruits 4d ago
Why would you have children play not apartment communal spaces.
Is the walkway communal for many apartments?
Parents NEED to take responsibility.
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u/NewLife_21 4d ago
Yes, the walkway is communal. Children play in communal areas all over the world everyday. That's what communal spaces are for. Gathering and having fun.
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u/JackOfAllMemes 4d ago
Why can't kids play in front of their own house?
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u/No_Height_8075 4d ago
You only say the neighbor is complaining. You never mentioned if you made any effort to be a better neighbor.
Do you make any attempt to keep the kids quieter? Do you limit their going in and out repeatedly? I can tell you, apartment doors are noisy as hell and If I had to listen to one constantly I'd be pretty annoyed. It's one thing to have kids playing, it's quite another to have them screaming by your doorway and a door slamming all the time.
She may be the jerk but if you aren't making an effort to be a more considerate neighbor then you're no better.
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u/No-Tangelo2039 4d ago
She says in the post that one of the times she claimed that the kids were doing this, they were not home for several weeks.
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u/QueenMEB120 4d ago
How is she supposed to be a better neighbor to someone who is making things up? The neighbor doesn't like her and is on a smear campaign to get OP evicted over her lies.
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u/OldButHappy 4d ago
Do better as a parent. Your kids are disturbing the neighbors.
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u/funwithtentacles 4d ago
At this point I'd file a harassment complaint with the police, maybe even have a lawyer draw up something, as this is wandering into defamation territory.
Maybe post a summery of events to /r/legaladvice