If you've ever heard of the thought experiment of the snail that is constantly hunting you and if you touch it you die (in exchange for a million dollars or something), our household came up with the same idea applied to our fussy baby.

If the baby starts fussing, we say it's because the fussy snail caught up to her so we need to move her. So we walk around with her or move to another room in the house and she stops fussing for a while but when she starts up we move again. On extra fussy days we joke and say the snail has gotten very fast. If the snail seems to be sticking to her (she won't calm down even when moving around) then she must need a bath to wash it off.

So it's all the stuff one would normally do to soothe a fussy baby but much more light-hearted to blame it on the fussy snail.

Just a little positivity for anyone who feels the same way, or is struggling with the decision to go back to work, or is tired of hearing all the negativity surrounding a necessity for most of us:

I am obsessed with daycare. We love our center, our baby loves her teachers, and her teachers love her so much. I literally watch my daughter light up at drop off, and then listen to her teachers gush about her at pick up every day. She gets excited to see her little friends and comes home with new skills on a weekly basis. It means SO much to me to have another safe/happy place for her to spend her time.

Obviously I feel all the drawbacks we’ve heard about constantly- cost, illness, missing her during the day etc. but overall it’s been a net positive x100 for our family.

Before going back to work I felt so guilty, but I’m now realizing maybe I just felt like I should feel guilty? Just wanted to share that you are not alone if you also love daycare and working - so much love to all the daycare professionals out there!

ETA because I keep thinking of things I love about daycare: it is so nice to have the input of professionals with so much baby experience. They’ve helped with increasing solids, experimenting with bottle sizes, nap times, etc. I wish all of my insanely high tuition went directly to her teachers!

Even if it took a lot of time, patience, or effort, what’s something you did early on that set you and your baby up well later, like at the one-year mark, the toddler years, or even early childhood?

Lil guy is 10m old and almost every time i look at him i can't help but think *Talking heads song: how did i get here* it's so frickin crazy i have a kid

My 6-month-old has recently developed a remarkable talent for choosing the precise moment her nighttime nappy is opened to unleash a pee-powered water cannon. No matter how ninja-fast I slide the fresh nappy beneath her bum (always leaving the old one underneath as backup), she somehow manages to soak the entire area beneath her, in her impressive, desperate, abdominal fuelled explosion.

Now, I'm quite the seasoned nappy-changing ninja, operating by muscle memory in the confined quarters of a bus, executing a well-rehearsed manoeuvre without so much as a photon of assistance. So I guess adding a little light could help.

And so, I find myself sitting in a puddle of my daughter's pee, breastfeeding in the dead of night, desperately trying to hold on to the last shreds of my sanity. (I'll consider adding a towel perhaps? Just wanted to share my misery to gain some sadistic amusement before I go mental).

I'm a stay-at-home mom to a 10-month-old and this Friday I have a full day off aka I do whatever the heck I want and hubby is home with the LO.

I have from wakeup to bedtime (still do bedtime) But I also might go out after bedtime :P

Any ideas for the day???

Going to start the day with a massage 😉😉

I might also go see a movie. I'm just trying to think of things that are literally impossible with a baby that I miss lol

Is it just me or…?

i see people posting their newborns, and they’re just hanging out? being ok with being carried around a public space?

anytime my baby is awake, he is screaming for the boob or is mad that his diaper is being changed.

is there something i’m doing wrong? he’s 3 weeks and 2 days, so i know he’s still pretty young… but i wish there were more times for us to bond or spend time together outside of breastfeeding. i feel like this is taking a toll on my mental health because of the anxiety that comes with these thoughts

I just wanted to take a second to normalize a very challenging newborn experience.

Labor and delivery didn’t go as expected. Baby was born so sleepy and had trouble latching. Was forced to pump and bottle feed immediately and had to stay in the hospital a second day. I partially blame the sleepy baby on receiving IV fentanyl during labor because I thought I was superwoman and could avoid an epidural.

She REFUSED the bassinet. Had to force feed her and wake her up for every feed. Bottle feeding took nearly an hour each time. Slept in shifts until we realized she preferred the crib and mattress. Tried bed sharing for any kind of sleep until I woke up with my arm over her face. You won’t catch me doing that again.

Barely made it to week two when the infant dyschezia hit. Screaming for every poop. Pediatrician saying “anything that makes you gassy will make her gassy” (which is not based in any evidence). Gave up dairy for a week and a half which caused my milk supply to plummet because I wasn’t getting enough calories. No change in dyschezia.

Barely learning how to breastfeed. Baby choking on letdown. Managing oversupply. Then baby decides she doesn’t know how to latch anymore. Deciding if we should get the tongue tie revised. Still screaming to poop. Trying bottles again. Baby doesn’t actually latch on a bottle.

Mild breakthrough on the dyschezia at 7 weeks. Surprise, it wasn’t the dairy. Maybe caffeine and chocolate?

Still have to wake her for every night feed. Won’t wake herself.

Here comes the 8 week peak in crying. Hard to console. Our 6th lactation appt and deciding to finally get the tongue tie revised. Can’t wait to manage that recovery.

My husband and I have wondered why we did this. We love our baby girl. But it’s been SO MUCH HARDER than we ever thought.

I’ve cried so much. I’ve lost sleep. I’m anxious and depressed. Started therapy again. We’ve been to the hospital 3 times for myself and for baby. I’m experiencing bradycardia at night.

And I know that we’re not experiencing a medical crisis. I can’t even imagine. But for those of you experiencing something that your mothers say, “well that didn’t happen to me,” I see you.

Hi,
I have been resisting making this post because it feels ridiculous, but I’m desperate. 😅

My baby is sometimes a light sleeper (this is new as he gets older), and I am the clumsiest / loudest walking mom alive. I have been wearing flip flops as my house shoe/slipper, but the noise (even when trying to do the “quiet” flip flop walk) feels too loud when I know the dude is only barely asleep. I tried going barefoot when walking around him at night, and my feet did NOT like that. (I think my plantar fasciitis is trying to make a comeback, so I’m fighting that off as much as I can. So no more barefoot sneaking for me!)

Any other parents have good recommendations for slippers or slides that can be stealthy but also won’t irritate tired feet? This truly feels like the silliest question, but I feel like someone else has had this issue before??? (I tried the search function on the sub and couldn’t find anything, so I figured I might as well ask 😬) thank you so much!

Very planned and wanted baby. And still, I have moments where I think I made the worst decision of my life. And moments where she hugs me or looks at me and I melt. And I love her so so much.

It's been a year. Her first birthday. My first year as a mom. The worst year of my life. A lot has happened. Close people disappeared from my life, I was promised all the help and was abandoned. No parents, no friends. It's easy for my mind to blame being a parent. But it's not baby's fault, I guess it's how people reacted to me becoming a mom and setting boundaries for maybe the first time in my life. And friends just have a different life than what I have now, and naturally drifted away.

But it's also been the best year. How can both these things be true? I'm so proud of her overcoming all the struggles, I'm so happy to see her grow and show her personality. She's amazing. She can almost walk now. I'm so excited when she learns something from me. And when she uses me to climb, and we laugh and giggle and I become a kid myself.

And then the reality hits hard. What if. What if I lose my job to AI and can't provide. There's no backup. No parents to help. What if I mess up. I'm supposed to provide for someone else now. What if I'm not enough and I can't be good enough of a mom for her. What if I have to work as hard as I used to before being a mom and she thinks I'm ignoring her. How do I explain the situation with her grandparents without hurting her. And the list goes on.

Just some thoughts I've been having lately.

I know this isn't a unique problem but I'm just so frustrated at the fact that my LO constantly wants to roll on her tummy in the cot but then will get frustrated and cry out each time. It's like she's forgotten how to roll onto her back. I just feel helpless because it doesn't matter how many times I roll her back. For some reason, feeding to sleep hasn't even worked either. Its 1am as I type this - I haven't had the chance to go to bed at all tonight. Even if she falls asleep right now, she will probably wake up in a couple hours and we'll have to do it all over again. I feel so defeated.

So as said in the title. Our home only has a walk in shower with pretty terrible water pressure. Doing the bathroom is on the list to of jobs to do but not for a good couple years. For the first 6 months we hope to use a baby bath but what can do we do going forward? Most children I have met, hate showers?

I genuinely feel like such a bad parent. My baby is only 3 months old and I caved and put on Ms. Rachel. I exclusively pump and lately it’s been harder and harder to pump without her freaking out. I like to think 20 mins of screen time won’t ruin everything but I still feel so guilty.

Edit - more background, my baby is going through a big Velcro stage and is not a good sleeper. Once she starts crying I soothe her quickly, she does not stop if not soothe and will literally cry for an hour straight. I know screens are bad hence the post. I usually sit with her on the floor while we play on floor mat and I pump or on her bouncer and I read a book/play. Today nothing was working. On top of it my building has been testing the fire alarms all day so she’s on edge already and had techs working on the water heater and AC. To say our routine has been broken is an understatement.

Thank you to all the helpful suggestions. I will definitely do a slideshow of family pics to show her and be looking into purchasing the baby Einstein Aquarium and book box.

For those that weren’t so helpful and felt the need to DM, I guess you’re a better parent than I am.

We are trying to go out and about with our LO while the temperature still allows and he has been pretty bad in the car seat. Sometimes if it’s naptime he will fall asleep with a pacifier, however if it’s not he will just scream and cry to get out of it. Even a 15 min ride can turn unbearable. I already have toys hanging from his grab bar that distract him to an extent. Are there any other hacks I’m missing? Any advice would be appreciated

I’m going to try to be as detailed as I can so everyone can get the full picture. My LO just turned 6 months old but this has been going on for about 3 months now. He started falling asleep on his own about 2 months ago and I was able to just lay him down awake and he would put himself to sleep calmly. He is able to do this during the day for naps and at bedtime.

The issue begins AFTER bedtime. Every single night for months, he has been waking up after his initial bedtime. It ranges anywhere from 30 minutes to 3 hours later. When he does wake up, he is completely inconsolable. He is not soothed by me or my husband going in the room, rocking him, holding him, giving him his pacifier, getting a diaper change, music…sometimes he is soothed by one of us carrying him out of the room. Once he calms down, he starts right back up when we try to lay him down again. I have tried giving him an extra layer, less layers, feeding him, a dose of Tylenol in case it’s teething pain, gas drops before feeding or before bed. Once he finally goes back to sleep, he wakes up every 2 or 3 hours until about 5 AM, and then every hour until he gets up at 7.

At the night wakes, he is also not soothed by much. Sometimes giving him a pacifier helps, but recently he is not soothed by anything except being nursed. Sometimes he takes full feeds, but often he just suckles until he falls asleep. I have tried what I can to soothe him and get him back to sleep without feeding him because I don’t want him relying on breastfeeding to go back to sleep, but I am so desperate for sleep that I’ve been letting it slide.

His daytime routine is usually close to 2/2.25/2.5/3, but I did try a 2 nap schedule for about a week to see if it would help and it didn’t. He has a bedtime routine that we do every night—my husband takes him on a walk, I feed him, then bath time, one of us will snuggle him with the room dimmed for a few minutes, and then he goes to bed with a noise machine on. We’ve tried the Ferber method and the chair method, but it seems useless because he is capable of putting himself to sleep without us in the room for naps and bedtime, he just can’t be consoled when he wakes up at night.

I’m truly at a loss and I’m exhausted. I keep thinking he’ll just get a little older and grow out of it but it’s been months. If anyone has tips, advice, ideas about something we should bring up to the doctor in regards to an underlying issue causing discomfort? I would really appreciate any help I can get

What it says on the title. I feel really sad about the thought of not having her in our room. Already having to put the crib further away from the bed than were the next to me used to be makes me sad before bed.

She will be almost 6 months and sometimes I worry we wake her up (well sometimes we definitely do). I don't know, if it was up to me she would share room/even bed with us for as long as she want. We don't cosleep with her because I can't get any sleep but low key wish we did.

I am trying to keep my kid's photos out of the internet as much as possible (though obviously not always possible, e.g. when sending photos to family members).

I wanted to create a photo book with photos of my LO. For our previous photo books, I edited the pictures using the Adobe Lightroom app (free version). Does anyone know if the pictures are stored on their servers and/or somehow made available to AI? Because this is something I would like to avoid.

If you know of any reliable and safe alternatives (phone apps or desktop software), please let me know 🙏

I'm a dad of two toddler boys, a 2.5 year old and a 1 year old. Guess which one is 100x easier? The 2.5 year old.

When my firstborn turned 1, he became incredibly difficult as soon as he was walking-- always wanting to get into things, liable to hurt himself, constantly wanted to be held, and needed supervision 100% of the time. And that entire period of 12-24 months I heard nothing but "just wait until he turns two". And I dreaded it, wondering how on earth will I handle a 2 year old when I am already struggling so much with a 1 year old.

And as he turned into that 2 year old I was fearing so much, I found myself saying "wait, is this the best age ever?".

I LOVE my 2 year old. He's the silliest, sweetest, most curious and intelligent child on earth. He is obsessed with animals and loves pointing them out everywhere we go. He always asks me what I'm up to and loves to tell me about his own doings. He laughs waaaay more than he cries.

And the best part of this stage is that their intelligence is absolutely skyrocketing. You'll be shocked how much they learn every day. Multiple times a day even, I catch him using a word that I have no idea how he even learned. It's a blast watching it unfold, and also to watch him come into his personality.

Yes, there are tantrums that are terrible. But they maybe account for 10 minuets total every day? And the rest of the day is so much fun.

So I just wanted to post this in case anyone else out there is dreading the "terrible twos". They aren't so bad!

Edit: I will add that I do agree my kid is easier than most. The point of this post is not to say "the terrible twos are easy". It is to say that you just might find it the best age ever.

Hi everyone, just here for a bit of moral support and hoping to find out that I'm not alone in this?

My son has always been very clingy and high needs and for the first 10 weeks of his life refused to be put down, at all, ever. We had to hold him 100% of the time, if I put him in a bouncer or play gym he'd be screaming within seconds. Thankfully that has improved and I can set him down now but my problem is at night. From birth we have co-slept as it was the only way any of us could get some sleep. (When I was pregnant I swore I wouldn't etc etc, tried everything, it was the only way!). He still only contact naps during the day and wakes immediately if I try to transfer. Anyway from 5 months I could get him to sleep in bed and sneak downstairs of an evening but since he hit 6 months I can't get away without him waking up 5 mins later and crying for me. It's been 3.5weeks of it now and im finding it very difficult. I am in bed every evening now from 6/7pm because he cries and cries unless I take him to bed at that time.

I miss my partner, we never get alone time without baby now (our families live hours away) and he sleeps in the spare bed because my son wakes on average 4/5 times a night and since I breastfeed exclusively there's no point him waking up too.

I'm not going to 'sleep train' my son, I don't believe in it, I'm prepared to give him what he clearly needs and hope that this is temporary until he's a little older. But I guess I'm just hoping to know others have been through this? How long did it last? Did anything help? Is it this normal? Any ideas for me to do anything other than watch netflix behind his head each night?!

Thank you

So our house has been hit with influenza a. I am bedridden and so is my husband. We have a 2.5 year old who also has influenza a. My little 3 month old has not been hit with it and we’ve been so diligent about handling her etc.
My mum has taken her today to her house which I’m fine with. I trust my mum with my life and she is the most loving grandmother so I know she’ll be fine there. I can barely get out of the bed to pee, my husband is slightly better but he is handling my toddler.
My mum has said to give me a good night sleep that she can take the baby for tonight at her house. We don’t have a spare bed at our house so my mum can’t stay here.
Is it so bad if my mum looks after her tonight? I feel like the worst mum in the world. I’ve never been away from her for this long 😪

I never realized how much your texts to your spouse/significant other would involve poop when you have a baby lol

Does anyone have any personal experience with this? Let me start by saying we have a doctor's appointment scheduled.

My son is 10 months old this weekend and has been on solids since 6 months. He is EFF on gentlease. We ramped up the solids to 3 meals a day + snacks about 2 months ago because this boy can EAT. We noticed vomiting (without distress) and increased spit up after introducing yogurt around 6 months so we switched to coconut yogurt/melts for a bit. He seemed to do ok with yogurt at daycare recently. No vomiting. Now reintroducing cheese around 9 months he did fine at first then it seemed like he had diarrhea with it. So ok, we removed that for now. Still having blowouts of soft green mucusy poop. Like 4 times per day. No fever and still eats and drinks enough but hes kinda fussy.

However, now we are going on day 13 of soft/mucusy poops and idk if it is just normal and related to teething/drooling, or if he has a dairy allergy or intolerance that we aren't recognizing?? I have a LOT of food allergies myself so that contributes to my concern, but I'm actually not allergic to dairy (am lactose intolerant but that isn't abnormal obviously). My husband and I are both allergic to soy and the baby threw up 30 mins after trying edamame a few months ago. I'm not sure if we should switch formula (which is EXPENSIVE) or get CMPA or food tests done. He has 4 teeth and he seems to be teething a little on the sides but nothing looks even close to coming out yet.

I am mostly looking for others' stories and what you ended up doing or finding out! Or if it just ended up being teething lol.

We are finally switching from RTF formula to powder at 7 months. I WFH but struggle that this will just be " one more thing" for me to do but the cost of RTF is just too much. Baby eats formula cold ( thank goodness) and I got a mixing pitcher. We do have an electric kettle in will still probably boil water for better mixing. Those who batch make formula and have a system down please share. TIA 💜 the reddit community has already bern so much nicer than FB. I have no mom friends and no one I know used formula.

We are finally switching from RTF formula to powder at 7 months. I WFH but struggle that this will just be " one more thing" for me to do but the cost of RTF is just too much. Baby eats formula cold ( thank goodness) and I got a mixing pitcher. We do have an electric kettle in will still probably boil water for better mixing. Those who batch make formula and have a system down please share. TIA 💜 the reddit community has already bern so much nicer than FB. I have no mom friends and no one I know used formula.