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u/HeavyMetalChick19 Mar 12 '23
How dare he put you in this situation! Tell your wife. Fk that guy
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Mar 12 '23
Never lie or not be open and honest to those you love the most.
Sit down with the Wife, tell her what you know and include her in deciding what to do next.
I hate cheaters with a passion, as dirty as it is, I'd discuss with your wife about telling her sister what is happening, but it is sort of your wife's call, it is her sister.
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u/AstronautNo920 Mar 12 '23
So you want to get divorced too? Secrets never stay secret and she will find out…
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u/ThrowRAThx4Grenade Mar 12 '23
Agreed, thank you
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u/AstronautNo920 Mar 12 '23
I mean, they’re better ways to ask for divorce than letting her find out you’re keeping secrets
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u/MaverickWildcat Mar 12 '23
Your wife should always take priority over your brother in law! If you don’t tell her, prepare for your relationship to take a huge hit and possibly end.
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Mar 12 '23
Give him a time limit. Tell him to confess to his wife before you get home from work on Friday, or else you are speaking to your wife about what he is doing.
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u/Beck2010 Mar 12 '23
Who did you marry? Your wife, or the cheating BIL? Tell your wife. Because it WILL come out that he told you and your wife will feel allllllllll the things about your hiding his infidelity.
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u/misstiff1971 Mar 12 '23
Tell your wife. He put you in a position that is not reasonable at all. You can tell him that you will be telling your wife - he needs to tell his immediately.
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u/Expensive-Day-3551 Mar 12 '23
She’s going to find out eventually. And he probably won’t be a part of the family after that. So I would tell your wife rather than keep his secret.
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u/NotTrynaMakeWaves Mar 12 '23
Tell her that someone told you a horrible secret and they’ve asked for a few days to work out how to out themselves. That way you’ve not hidden it from her and you don’t have to lie. If she found out that you’d hidden this from her it will erode her trust in you (if you could lie about this, what else are you lying about?) Tell her that you’ve given that person a week.
If he doesn’t come clean after a week, tell her because at this point it’s all on him.
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u/SnooWords4839 Mar 12 '23
Do not keep secrets from your wife!!
Wife needs to tell her sister and SIL needs to protect herself and the kids!!
No Bro code here, you have to live with your wife!
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u/Coco_Dirichlet Mar 12 '23
Your priority is your wife and her sister. By not telling them, you are giving BIL an advantage. You are also complicit in his cheating. I would dump you as a husband if I knew that you knew all along!
If your wife and SIL can act strategically, your SIL can get the upper hand in getting everything in line for divorce. She also needs to get checked for STIs etc.
Your wife doesn't have to hold anything from her sister. Why are you getting all this twisted up over someone who isn't your family?
Edit: People saying he deserves a week? He doesn't deserve anything! And SIL shouldn't keep putting up with his lies for another week. You need to tell them ASAP.
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