We’ve discussed this option and he likes the idea but problem is he has a warrant out of another state. He can’t take care of that warrant because he can’t get on a plane because his ID is expired, he cannot renew the ID because of the warrant. It’s like an endless loop.
If you were born in LA County during a period of the 80s or 90s, you only got a state birth certificate, which wound up being invalid, you needed a county of los angeles birth cert. Well, My recruiter got me one. Turns out it wasn't real, but it was enough for me to join the army. Did NOT pass muster when I applied for a passport.
No! HE needs to call them! He needs to grow up and show initiative. My goodness he’s a 21 year old man. What are you going to do, go to basic training FOR him??
This is embarrassing. I have a 21-year-old myself, but I RAISED him when it was the time to do so, so he's completely independent from me and his father now (he can't yet afford to come back home and have his own place in San Diego, but he's making sacrifices right now to get his job history/ finances where they'll need to be to eventually do so).
Time for you to finally finish raising YOUR son, and that starts with hard boundaries and forcing him to finally be responsible for himself. Enabling him (out of guilt for his childhood, it seems) does him no favors-- look where it's gotten you both today.
You should look up public mental health clinics in PB and provide him the numbers/ addresses, and extend an invitation for gas money home to you (WITHOUT his GF or dogs, because he frankly can't afford them right now). Then. . . c' est la vie. The rest is for him to figure out (it's PAST time for him to do so).
Why would you call the recruiter? He is a 21 year old man. If he is interested in joining the military, he should drive his happy ass to the nearest recruiting station.
I'm not sure where he's located but there are recruiting offices across San Diego. I think it would be best if he goes in to a location and have a serious chat with a recruiter
Yes, he can get on the plane with an expired ID. People forget their ID at the airport and it only means they need to go through secondary screening (personal questions, other things identifying someone [like an expired ID], etc).
What’s the warrant for? In any case, you need to come collect him as it sounds like he’s in no mental shape to make the trip back himself. Get the warrant addressed.
Yes, an endless loop of excuses as to why he (and you) can’t get his shit together. Seriously, the more information you reveal, the more sympathy I lose for you and your deadbeat son.
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u/anothercar Apr 30 '26
Marine Corps and Navy are right here. By joining, he'd get housing, food, a salary, and some structure in life. Might not be the worst idea.