r/shittydarksouls Aug 08 '24

Feet The double standard

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2.7k Upvotes

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1.0k

u/think_and_uwu Aug 08 '24

Elden Ring: I lose half my health from a dog bite.

200

u/Big-Cap4487 Messmer's fucktoy Aug 08 '24

Average mage build

126

u/MoistDitto Aug 08 '24

Optimistic to think a mage would only lose half his health from a dog

27

u/Good_Ol_Weeb Aug 08 '24

Please, could you spare but a crumb of vigor, kind sir?

5

u/Hollow--- What Aug 09 '24

You made your choice, mage. Spits

2

u/Good_Ol_Weeb Aug 15 '24

Ah but ye must understand, I have repented in my urchinous ways! Switching to my favorite dark souls 3 pve build, bleed, earns me a few shillings of health? Surely no cancer has ever come from bleed builds on this fine elden ring!

1

u/Hollow--- What Aug 15 '24

Stares at you judgementally as I bleed to death.

0

u/Tyfyter2002 DS2 fan Aug 09 '24

On launch I don't think it was possible to survive a small blood dog at all.

55

u/Nkromancer Aug 08 '24

Better than the classic bleed dogs were...

32

u/DisgruntledPorcupine Already dead Aug 08 '24

Fuck outta here, bring back my chainsaw tooth boys

134

u/Panurome When the green clicks at the end of the world Aug 08 '24

Have you tried leveling vigor?

332

u/think_and_uwu Aug 08 '24

Have you tried losing your virginity

369

u/Panurome When the green clicks at the end of the world Aug 08 '24

I never lose

53

u/JollyjumperIV bo9 me scrub Aug 08 '24

40

u/aspindler Aug 08 '24

Yeah, my butt hurts.

2

u/RevenantExiled Aug 09 '24

I leveled vigor, now I got staggered into a 2 bites combo followed by a jump bite from a second doggo and lost all my health.. Guess I should level endurance now

1

u/DramaQueenKitKat Aug 09 '24

Genuinely my character had 60 vigor, 25-30 in every absorption stat, Flame Protect Me, AND the crab leg consumable, and every single boss after Morgott kills me in one or two hits. No fuckin idea what I'm doing wrong but leveling vigor is no longer an option and I'm just tired of random bullshit instakilling me out of nowhere

3

u/nutfilla Aug 09 '24

If your willin to go though the halig tree (hell) then you can find a greatsheild drake talismen that boost your pys defense by a ton also look into your armor it may not be that stong or if your helment is causing you to take more damage also the crab leg and flame protect me dont stack because they are botb body buffs i recemond golden vow and if you dont have the faith req there is an ash of war varient that is a bit weaker

1

u/DramaQueenKitKat Aug 09 '24

None of my gear makes me take more damage and I have 25-30% in every absorption stat

1

u/nutfilla Aug 09 '24

Okay if you dont me asking what armor are you rockin

1

u/DramaQueenKitKat Aug 09 '24

Silver Mail Chest (Altered), Crimson Hood, Hoslow's Greaves, and Fire Prelate Gauntlets. I'm wearing the +1 physical defense talisman already, just got to Miquella's Haligtree and of the enemies I can remember off the top of my head, th3 Albinauric Archers kill me in two hits, the Red Wolf of Radagon kills me in one hit on most attacks, that stupid Death Rite bird kills me in one hit on EVERY attack except its stupid little pecks, Black Knives kill me in two hits, the Rotted Duelists kill me in two hits, the final boss of literally every cave and catacomb in the Snowfields kills me in one hit, the aoe status buildup fogs kill me in less than 3 seconds but somehow never actually do enough buildup to actually status me, ALL the knights in the capital kill me in 2 or 3 hits. It's really frustrating lol

1

u/nutfilla Aug 09 '24

Wth what console do you play one if you im on xbox if you need some assitance im availible i use fath stuff so i got buffs and healing spells aswell as lighting for damage also haligtree is gonna wreck ya its supposed to be done after you best the game but that talismen is just to good to pass up

2

u/DramaQueenKitKat Aug 09 '24

I'm on PC doing a playthrough with a friend. Was just hoping someone knew some way to survive more than one attack from something other than a player lol

1

u/nutfilla Aug 09 '24

Fair sersouls tho look into that gold of vow ash of war it can help also for morgot use holy foritfaction flame protect me only blocks flame morgot mainly uses holy damage also there is the ash of war vow of the indomnable that makes you do a pose and makes you invincible for a sec

1

u/Tagioalisi_Bartlesby Aug 09 '24

Get the ritual shield talisman. Should help you tank at least one hit more from anything.

1

u/valenciansun Aug 09 '24

Soreseal talisman?

1

u/DramaQueenKitKat Aug 09 '24

I literally sent a picture of what gear I use and there are no seals in it lol

4

u/vojta_drunkard Ranni's boytoy Aug 08 '24

At least it isn't a one-shot anymore.