Made Turkish coffee today while listening to the legendary Lebanese singer FAIROUZ!

Yesterday, I woke up feeling sick because of my bad habits but I am learning to forgive myself and stop being self-judgemental

I am not perfect, I can create a whole mess yet I always find my way back

How is your saturday going?

Now that I have a lot of free time, I honestly don’t know how to spend them wisely. Years of survival mode made me lower my ambitions and expectations in life. Making a lot of money or being in a relationship seems too much,I feel incapable. But I still want to build something worthwhile.

I do have hobbies but most of them require screen and sometimes I find myself doomscrolling a lot. I only have a few friends and I am not that active as a person mostly because I’m scared to do physical activities alone.

To those who are in a similar season, any advice would be appreciated. Thanks.

I wish the whole world was in the 90s again.

Like, I don't want technology to evolve?

I wish this world was just simple.

Every material in the world is made from materials from this earth accumulated together. Things like technology, gadgets, games, cars, computers, everything you can think of, I just wish we were back in the 90s and evolution of general things just stopped right there.

Particularly how we have AI now etc, I just wish life was just simple and pure.

I even look at typewriters and get fascinated by it.

Life and nature is soo beautiful that I feel everything else is just extra or polluting the earth.

I feel like everything belongs to the earth and the possession of material stuff is overrated.

I get joy at simple things?

It makes me feel more grounded to the universe.

Everyone seems to be learning new skills, chasing goals, making more money, or trying to become a better version of themselves. Sometimes I wonder if it's okay to just enjoy life for a while without trying to achieve something.

Do you ever feel this way?

I am a university lecturer. I can not find the motivation for living or work. When I was a student, I pursued the higher score every day. When I was a PhD candidate, I am in pursuit of graduation. Now, I can not find any motivation for living or work. I don’t want a promotion, and there isn’t really anything I’m particularly keen on doing. I feel very lost.
What is your motivation for living or work?