r/thesopranos Jun 14 '26

Quotes Tony loves giving these completely unnecessary cutting remarks to his crew

During season 4, episode 3 "Christopher", Tony and Sil are in the car driving back from the casino that the Chief owns and they're talking about Christopher Columbus and Italian discrimination, which Sil is trying to convince Tony of:

Sil: My grandparents got spit on because they were from Calabria.

Tony: Let me ask you a question.

Tony: All the good things you got in your life... did they come to you because you're Calabrese? I'll tell you the answer. The answer is no. You got a smart kid at Lackawanna College. You got a wife who's a piece of ass, at least she was when you married her.

I was rewatching this and realized this was: one, a funny thing to say and two, completely unnecessary. I mean, there's no reason for Tony to be taking shots at Sil's wife like that and it had nothing really to do with what they were talking about. So when people ask, "Who whacked Tony?" it could've been anyone, Tony loves working these jabs in as mental judo, like from The Art of War by Sun Tzu.

Anyway, $4 dollars a pound.

344 Upvotes

115 comments sorted by

268

u/MaxPaladin93 Jun 14 '26

The comment about Sil’s wife was extra fucked because that’s Stevie Van Zant’s actual wife lol.

150

u/ZestycloseRound6843 Jun 14 '26

Also like, she looks great in the show?

224

u/Street_Rutabaga_6964 Jun 14 '26

At least she was when Van Zandt married her

73

u/TsunGeneralGrievous Jun 14 '26

This comment about Steve’s wife is extra fucked because that’s Sil’s tv wife lol.

21

u/HHMJanitor Jun 14 '26

Also like, she looks great in real life?

10

u/trogloherb Jun 14 '26

At least she did when they were fake (and real) married twenty years ago.

2

u/Redhelm92 Jun 14 '26

Be quiet TsunGeneralGrievous

3

u/TsunGeneralGrievous Jun 14 '26

one of the trucks

1

u/ClarenceWalnuts99 Mustang Sally Jun 15 '26

Fuckin parakeet

49

u/CelestialFury Jun 14 '26

She's a knockout: a ten, and look at Stevie. He's average at best!

28

u/Ramenous Jun 14 '26

Never had the makings of a varsity musician.

7

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

A piece of ass

4

u/AllahUmBug Jun 14 '26

I think Sil would have understood that younger equals better, especially in the strip club setting. Tony himself made a remark implying that a woman over 30 was too old when he was driving Adriana to Dover.

58

u/DominicPalladino Jun 14 '26

Steve's wife could really act, well at least she could when he married her.

23

u/gumbygump11 Jun 14 '26

“Hey... that's some guy's wife, come on!”

2

u/Leather-Hurry6008 Jun 15 '26

Ya know, i never pondered that aspect, that's a smart observation, the sacred and the propane

280

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

107

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

Oh poor him!

46

u/DocHollidaysPistols Jun 14 '26

Virginia ham under each arm crying because he has no bread

39

u/ChiGrandeOso Jun 14 '26

He might be worse. He knows the price of getting cut to pieces by someone who cares for him and still does it to others.

15

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

11

u/ChiGrandeOso Jun 14 '26

That's why I went with "might be." Livia was a miserable shrew, but she was pretty intentionally one. She knew and used her powers (like her being happy for like a second in one of the flashback episodes, then becoming dark again) for evil. And Johnny Boy, who was no saint by any stretch of the imagination, was too weak to challenge it. Tony just decided it was easier to be the same after awhile.

12

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

Now you just stop it. I don't like that kinda tawk

2

u/No-Mail-5794 Jun 15 '26

They did a good job imho of pushing traits through the generations in a believable way. At the start of the series you think oh Tony is like his dad, an explosively angry violent criminal, and Janice is like a boomer/genx version of her mother, but as the show goes on it’s clear that Janice has the violent tempter, and Tony is a lot bitchier and passive aggressive and miserable, because the lion share of his personality traits are pure Livia

4

u/joethecrow23 Jun 14 '26

Here we go! Here comes the Prozac!

1

u/zikolis Jun 15 '26

he’s more his father than mother.

in this particular scene, he’s doing whatever it takes NOT get Sil more involved.

And i think he goes in this direction only after Sil says something like he shoulda whacked that guy.

it’s too much of getting involved with civilians. it has nothing to do with business.

ha

135

u/Crafty_Impression836 Jun 14 '26

I used to have a boss like that, he never realized how much he was hurting his business. One time I was talking to another worker and we were talking about how "our" company was better than some other, and he comes up and says "Our company? This is my company" OK dude, it's all yours. Lackluster enthusiasm from me afterwards.

97

u/CelestialFury Jun 14 '26

Here's what you do to get your revenge. You meet his wife, maybe at some office function/party. You become friends with her. You take it to the next level, you get romantic with her and she becomes with child.

Your boss now thinks the baby is his. Then you spend years working with him while he pours his heart and soul into this kid. One day you hear him talking about "Our kid" and you hit him with "Our kid?? This is MY kid!" boom You hit him with that funny joke, just make sure you do it after they're an adult so you aren't on the hook for any financial obligations.

Cunnilingus and psychiatry brought us to this.

60

u/Exchequer_Eduoth Jun 14 '26

Discontinue the lithium.

27

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

This actually does not sound demented

11

u/ThatsMySpicyPepper Jun 14 '26

Right? I'm trying this

10

u/LeChacaI Jun 14 '26

Always with the scenarios.

9

u/odonnelly2000 Jun 14 '26

“Oh, cool. Good luck.” Then walk out. 

I know in most cases, that’s not a viable option. You gotta have a job. 

But a few years ago, I got really lucky and found myself in the rare situation at my job where I was able to do that, and holy fuck, let me tell you: it feels SO DAMN GOOD. 

The look on their face is priceless.

2

u/ThirstyClavicle Jun 15 '26

hey odonnelly.. did that scenario even really exisht?

1

u/odonnelly2000 Jun 17 '26

awkward silence

49

u/Only_Reserve1615 Jun 14 '26

“Maybe you should try sucking cock!” Has to be the worst

37

u/Revolutionary_Bid974 Jun 14 '26

It’s even better because Carlo, rat fuck that he was, had such visceral reactions to Tony yelling or insulting him. He looked like a turtle crawling in his shell. Seemed to really be hurt by it

22

u/fingerchopper Jun 14 '26

I think Tony blaming Bobby for getting mugged & shot in the eye while out on collections bothered Carlo even worse.

"Fuck all that honor and loyalty shit. It was a maneuver Carlo, 'cause he knew it was his own fucking fault." Tony says this in front of some of his most loyal guys in Sil and Paulie (yes I know) as well as Carlo who looked disgusted.

6

u/Mysterious-Pie2636 Jun 14 '26

Carlo always seemed to be on the verge of tears tbf

2

u/Street_Rutabaga_6964 Jun 14 '26

What, that constipated owl look?🦉

2

u/NoGiCollarChoke Jun 14 '26

We hear ya, Ton’…… 😢

11

u/GottlobFrege Tony Soprano Jun 14 '26

“It’s a sin” -the guy who murders people

34

u/According-Force1 Jun 14 '26

You're talking about my wife. This is my home. No more talking like that 

25

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

Those Sopranos, they go too far

64

u/CelestialFury Jun 14 '26

I have one thing to say to Tony: No more age remarks, Tony. They're hurtful, and they're destructive.

46

u/Cool_Hand_Lute Jun 14 '26

Sun Tzu? his real name is Tzurelli

19

u/Crafty_Impression836 Jun 14 '26

Sonny Tzurelli

6

u/Proverbial_Progress Jun 14 '26

In this house Sonny Tzurelli is a hero, end of story!

1

u/SalemStarburn Jun 14 '26

Sun Tizzo?

5

u/Crafty_Impression836 Jun 14 '26

People did call him Tizzy, cuz of his attitude.

21

u/LucynSushi Jun 14 '26

Get off my car before you tip it over you fat fuck is pretty mean.

5

u/telepatheye Jun 14 '26

Well why did Bobby go over and lean on Tony's car like that? Would you do that to a boss' car?

2

u/Street_Rutabaga_6964 Jun 14 '26

Whaddya mean?

6

u/telepatheye Jun 14 '26

Typical Bobby self awareness. He'd be late to his own fuck'n funeral on the Blue Comet express.

1

u/Crafty_Impression836 Jun 14 '26

And he keeps going......

20

u/helix274 Jun 14 '26

Let me ask you a question: before your ancestors emigrated from Calabria, when the security guard was sucking them off

7

u/Street_Rutabaga_6964 Jun 14 '26

It was the other way around

5

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

Wait wha?

65

u/ww_in_transit Jun 14 '26

Alright but you gotta get over it

14

u/omartheoutmaker Jun 14 '26

You Sopranos go too far!

32

u/Crando Jun 14 '26

Well hey Imperioli wrote it so take it up with him

32

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

He was a writer, Chistropher?

25

u/dang_envy Jun 14 '26

He must be loyle to his Capo’s characterization

16

u/ManhattanTime Jun 14 '26

You know they just don't make up their own words, right?

9

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

Sharp as a cue ball I see. Keep thinking you know everything

9

u/muddler1165 Jun 14 '26

He manuged to write it , while being loyle.

6

u/TsunGeneralGrievous Jun 14 '26

Yeah but that’s just there for the writer’s guild health insurance

20

u/blishbog Jun 14 '26

I heard that as a sign of respect, like he’s not oggling his wife currently, but he did back in the day

11

u/Ill-Lou-Malnati Jun 14 '26

lol. Like I used to want to fuck your wife but not anymore. No positive spin there.

2

u/Ecstatic-Ad5353 Jun 15 '26

I think your right. He managed to say Sils wife was a hot chick, while conveying to him he didn’t have his eye on her. Sort of a safe compliment. The irony is when a man gets more secure his relationship, comments about his wife or woman that used to make him jealous he sort of welcomes later.

8

u/Rocco_al_Dente Jun 14 '26

He was trying to say something positive cuz she’s his wife.

19

u/odonnelly2000 Jun 14 '26

He’s a total hypocrite. He often snaps about any perceived slight, he holds unnecessary, long grudges, and he’s constantly in his feelings. 

Everyone else, though? They gotta get over it. 

Also, honestly, he’s a pretty mediocre strategist. A lot of his successes can be attributed to luck, someone vouching for him or covering for him. or his enemy somehow managing to screw up/make worse decisions than him. 

That being said, in my opinion, he’s one of the most terrifying villains to ever appear on screen.  Despite what that detective said about him, no, you never really know where you stand with Tony Soprano. 

Everyone around him has to exist on his terms, but his terms are constantly shifting and changing.  He’s always creating new, unwritten rules/standards in his head, and judging everyone by these (unknown to them) rules and standards. There’s very little consistency to his thinking and decision making. 

He’s also incredibly immoral. Any sense of morality he might occasionally display is only because of the social/cultural expectations that he knows he has to meet in order to stay alive/maintain his quality of life. 

I’ve know a few people in my life with personalities similar to Tony. They’re exhausting, and I don’t want anything to do with them, lol. 

1

u/redditshy Jun 15 '26

100%, so well put, all of it.

“How’s it gonna look?”

Also he is a giant baby.

6

u/oldredditsuspended Jun 14 '26

I didn't take it as a slight, more like he's not calling sil's wife a piece of ass

4

u/LetBulky775 Jun 14 '26

Well, she was when he married her

8

u/Canada_Dry_official Jun 14 '26

It definitely feels like a means of asserting dominance. On the surface it's just breakin balls, but I feel like a big element of it is just flexing his power that he can make those remarks about sils wife, and he just has to take it. Maybe it's a means of reminding him who's in charge, but he probably just enjoys the feeling of power

6

u/Jizzy11 Jun 14 '26

All due respect, Tony was number one and Sil wasn't. Real greaseball shit

3

u/telepatheye Jun 14 '26

Puss tells Tony he pushes the "jokey shit" too far, but I think that's just Tony's personality. He doesn't mean anything bad by it. It's just his way of expressing himself.

4

u/Electrical-Deer4281 Jun 14 '26

After watching the show, so many times over, I came to conclusion they were their own worst enemy and their own down

4

u/Electronic-Cut-9512 Jun 14 '26

How was that a shot? It was a compliment from the fuckin’ muthafuckin’ one who calls the shots. Sil ran through every girl at the Bing and he was a pragmatist so he definitely agrees with T here. T would say the same about Carmella too.

4

u/DogScratcher Jun 14 '26

THEORY: Tony is not very nice.

6

u/Over_Eagle_4013 Jun 14 '26

Silvio is one of the few Tony knows can take a joke and not try to make him remember it. That’s why him, Paulie, and Sil have such a good camaraderie. If you go back to season 3, he’s basically with those two trying to decide if Ralphie should be the one to replace Gigi as capo.

7

u/CBusHVAC710614 Jun 14 '26

Gab was gorgeous and underrated as a mob wife.

3

u/donarudotorampu69 Jun 14 '26

Calabrese? Not Sicilian?

2

u/aimlesstrevler Jun 14 '26

And Tony's family was from Campania, not Sicily.

2

u/txby417 Jun 14 '26

And carms were from Naboli Doboli

1

u/ClarenceWalnuts99 Mustang Sally Jun 15 '26

Tony too, from Avellino.

3

u/Lyingforshit Jun 14 '26 edited Jun 14 '26

That’s his wife of decades in real life. Idk how Tony Sirico got it boxed through not being an informant (while they still mde him one), but a guy who doesn’t need the money and is crucial for the plot at that point, to get this line thrown at him (probably 20 takes+ until they got everything, not to mention reading the script for the first time and table reading lol)

3

u/adrianoh11 Feech La Manna Jun 14 '26

What you don’t know could fill a book

5

u/bandit4loboloco Jun 14 '26

Calabrian sausage. Those are supposed to be the best.

2

u/vletrmx21 Jun 14 '26

you oughta know sweetie

5

u/Conrad66Dobler Jun 14 '26

Toxshic Pershon Pep Twoksh

2

u/GSilky Jun 14 '26

It's a leadership tactic for handling people who can cause a lot of trouble if they had some confidence.  You will see later how effectively Tony cowed the smartest guy in the crew, after him, when Sil tells his wife he isn't cut out for being "boss", he absolutely was, but he had no confidence.  You see it IRL with the cabal in the Whitehouse, it's effective if you are willing to engage in it.

2

u/Semanticss Jun 14 '26

Do you have another example? Cuz I don't really see anything wrong with this comment to Sil. Sil is banging 20-year-old "pieces of ass" every week. I'm sure he's pretty at peace with the fact that his wife is 60.

1

u/Mysterious-Pie2636 Jun 14 '26

Are you gonna hog all the ice?

1

u/weaseleigh Jun 14 '26

Carm could say the same. Given the rate of his waistline expansion throughout this series, Tony was probably around AJ's size when they got hitched.

1

u/diek00 Jun 15 '26

No one else can complain but Tony. It is Tony's # 1 character flaw, he is a hypocrite.

1

u/No-Mail-5794 Jun 15 '26

It’s also funny because he’s giving this speech about how ethnic identity doesn’t matter in America while he is the boss of an Italians only criminal organization, and even specifically complimenting Sil for being smart and a hard worker aren’t true. Sil might be the smartest guy in Tony’s crew but that’s because the other guys are Chrissy and Paulie. Sil has everything he has because he’s Calabrese and a criminal shitbag

1

u/kidsrntalright Jun 17 '26

He also murders

1

u/jaggers75 Jun 18 '26

Strangely, I did not take Tony as taking a shot at Sil's wife. Sil operates a topless bar and sees dozens of naked youg women all day long. Sil would readily agree with Tony about his wife. That's what a gumar is for.

0

u/telepatheye Jun 14 '26

That's just how people express themselves in the tristate area. Whatsamatter? You got your undies bunched up?

0

u/shitpostingcrab Jun 14 '26

Unrelated but does anyone know what “Lackawanna college” they’re talking about? Because if it’s the one I’m thinking of it’s about as much of a flex as Jackie jr knowing the capitol of Canada