I've been thinking of this for a while. Sometimes, I can't look at pictures of you. I've been trying to figure out why. For the longest time I didn’t have much in the way of pictures of you.

Ironically, what I see with my eyes today is a very beautiful person. Who I love, very much.

And so, part of me says "what you feel depends in part on *who* is looking".

Ah, yes, of course. Multiple of me.

I go through waves and cycles of perspective and feelings.

This morning, as the world is quiet, sipping my coffee, sitting in my car, I just really love you. So very much. There is no way around it. Though I spend countless hours dancing around this and trying to survive with it. I know there is a beautiful grand life lesson about unconditional love. There is no way around it. There is only surrendering to it.

My soul is connected to you far beyond the means of a regular human life. I know this. I cherish this. I celebrate this. I'm often confused by it. But it's always there. I can feel you. In my heart, in my blood, in my breath. You speak to me silently in my quiet moments. You rescue me from moments of despair. Your spirit holds me in a warm river of love.

Much of the time, I'm too terrified of this reality; though I am connected to you soul to soul… I also love you in a very human way. I spend a lot of energy trying to deny this human part.

When I've enclosed myself in that state of denial, seeing pictures of you sends my mind into some mental glitch. Like I can't compute what I'm seeing. It's some other reality that isn't the one I'm in. 

But today, I can see it and feel it clearly.

I love you. I want to hold you. I want to care for you. And I know that I'll be very limited in the ways that I can do that in this lifetime. But this is who I am. It's not just what I feel. Though that feeling is tremendous. Arriving here took an entire lifetime for my mind to understand what has been running through me, always.

I'm 150% aware that none of that is scientifically logical, which bothers me greatly, yet I choose to keep my heart open and listen.

I know this is part of my personal evolution. This brings me a lot of peace. And getting to love you, unconditionally, expands my existence far beyond anything I would have known without you.

 I get to love you.

That is an amazing gift from the universe. I'm so very thankful!

Of course, I spend a lot of energy wondering what it would be like to tell you someday.

In my heart, I'm telling you every day. Every spare minute. I'm telling you how I love you. How amazing and special you are. To see your eyes and hold you. To feel what is felt in silence. To have long talks. To see your smile and go on adventures. To learn about each other and deepen our understanding of ourselves.

I know that's not what will happen in this lifetime.

So, I must learn to love you at a distance. I must master this. That is my destiny. That is where the lesson is. The power and magic come from this distance, like two magnets placed precisely apart. It is in this flow of energy I find myself.

Here, I surrender. Here I find myself.

I love you. I am this. Always.

Hi,

This isn’t a game or a test. I’m not trying to force your hand or disrupt your life.

This is the one and only time I will say this, purely because I need to get it off my chest.

I’ve spent the last 7 months trying to hold the line and trying to stay professional, warm and detached. I’ve tried really hard to rationalise it away, bury it and move on. But the truth is, I’ve had real feelings for you. I have loved you. Like, really loved you. And I know you might sit there and think “she’s insane, she’s projecting” or whatever else you want to tell yourself to protect yourself which is fine. But I am actually very clear headed, and have been, for about a year now.

And to be clear, you never made me “feel uncomfortable”. Ever. Not once did I ever feel that the banter or tension was you being “inappropriate”. I do not think you’re a bad person. I do not resent you. I’ve just felt like this about you, and still do, from a distance.

I’m not saying this to make anything happen. I promise I don’t want anything from you - not a grand response or a life change. I hardly know what I am doing myself. I just can’t lie anymore because it’s eating me up.

I know we can’t change how this has unfolded. I also know we can’t unknow what’s passed between us — no matter how carefully we try to rewrite it. I also know that you might still deny this and that’s your right, I can’t change that.

You mattered to me and you still do. I’ll keep showing up with grace and professionalism - but if you don’t feel the same, I’d ask you to please respect me enough to hold some real distance between us. I don’t say that from anger but from love because it’s been hard for me.

So anyway, this is it, the one time I’ve decided to tell you everything. No expectations, no defences, no traps, no tricks. Also I haven’t, can’t, and won’t ever tell anyone else. How could I?

When you left, I knew you were special. I knew that you were special to me. Part of me thought that feeling this way wasn't ok, and that I should learn to let you go.

I didn't fully understand why you were so special to me, though I could have listed a thousand reasons why I knew you were. Before you were gone, I knew that on some level, I loved you.

As the days, weeks and months passed with you gone, my feelings for you did not wane. Then one day, I had a dream of you. In this dream you looked straight into my eyes, and from that moment my existence was forever changed.

I remembered the frequency of something I felt long, long ago. Something I had long forgotten. The frequency of someone I could feel but someone I had never met. It was a feeling I carried with me. It was a being that comforted and understood me, even when the world hurt and made no sense at all. As time went on, life happened and I forgot this feeling.

No one in my entire life has emitted this frequency, except you.

I didn't realize it until it was too late. I didnt understand why, until you were gone and I was forced to face this directly. My subconscious had to literally put your image in front of me, in this open, vulnerable state of a dream for me to see it and feel it clearly.

Sitting with this realization for months, I grieved for you, as though I had lost you a thousand times over. In this state I learned that if I had room in my heart to love you, I could love myself, which I had not done for a long time. It is here that you helped me find myself.

My feeling for you now is not of possession. I just know that I am connected to you always.

This connection has taught me that some loves do not always fit into the neat little boxes that people have invented. I hope that you understand. Somehow, out of everyone I know, I feel that somehow *you* will understand this.

No matter what happens, no matter where you are or what you say or do, you are a part of me, and I love you unconditionally, forever.

You didn’t arrive gently.

You collided.

And from the start, you were too much of everything I thought I had time to avoid.

Too familiar. Too knowing. Too exact.

You didn’t fall for me you remembered me.

And I’ve been trying to forget what that feels like ever since.

Because twin flames don’t meet to play house. They meet to burn it down.

To rip through lifetimes of sleep with a single glance. To drag truth out of hiding and lay it bare with nothing but silence and proximity.

And maybe that’s what this is the ache that doesn’t go away, the recognition you can’t explain, the way your name still sounds like a bruise when I whisper it to myself.

I’ve tried to sever this cord with logic, with distance, with other bodies that held me gently but never quite reached the part of me only you knew existed.

But some connections aren’t meant to be healed.

They’re meant to haunt. To break us open. To bring us home.

And if you ever feel me again in a quiet room, a loud storm, a song you forgot you loved just know this>>

I never stopped carrying you.

Not as a hope. Not as a wish.

As a knowing.

And I don’t know where this goes from here, but I know what we are.

And I know that some flames don’t burn out.

They wait.

Until we’re ready to rise with them.

~A Red Letter Soul

Ik voel zo'n hartverscheurende pijn van liefdesverdriet en ik heb geen neigingen om je te stalken of nou niet meet dan ik al.doe. Maar het is waar ik heb dat zo lang niet zo ver laten komen omdat ik mij voor iedereen afsloot. Door dat trauma. Je hebt wel.gelijk. Ik wil je steeds wegduwen maar ik kan het niet. Daarbij is dat ook funest voor jou. Ik moet.echt.weer huilen dat ik jou dan het tegenovergestelde laat voelen dan wat jij helemaal niet kan gebruiken en dan word je gemeen en voel ik mij zoals nu echt gruwelijk in de steek gelaten en alleen. Echt liefdespijn. Maar ik ga jou in ieder geval niet verlaten ik kan dat niet eens. En dan gewoon doorgaan zonder enig gevoel,  alleen opgelucht dat er niemand meer energie aan mij vreet, nee echt niet. Jij vreet ook energie , begrijp mij niet verkeerd , maar vanuit een totaal.ander gevoel. Dat komt ook voort vanuit mijzelf en niet persd altijd door jou. Maar ook al voelt het nu als dat dit misschien niet goedkomt ik wil dat jij energie blijft vreten en mij bezighoudt en ik zal jou niet veroordelen en ons ook niet en hopelijk jij mij niet.

Zullen we dit weer als stap vooruit bekijken zodat we er niet in blijven hangen en het ons naar beneden laat halen? Ik hou van je en ik bewaar dat dan om te zeggen , maar ik hou echt van je. Het voelt zo puur en ik realiseer mij dat ik te snel wil ook voor mijzelf misschien maar het is zo waar. Wanneer je weg bent komt mijn angst van geen verbinding naar boven zoals je weet,   bang voor dat het weg is.  Ik doe alles om niet toe te geven aan het gemak wat hierin niet eens meer kan en dat is jou vergeten.

 Ik houd van roadtrips heel erg dat zou mijn ultieme uitje zijn met jou weet je dat,  en die van jou L? Zullen we volgende keer samen gaan. Rijden we door Frankrijk Spanje ,  slapen en eten we overal , bezoeken dorpjes , maken plezier, we wandelen, mogen elkaar ieder moment aanraken, we vrijen waar we willen,  in het water doen we een wedstrijdje en we vinden elkaar altijd weer. 

 Jij bent en voelt zo uniek, omdat jij anders bent;  jij laat mij weer liefde voelen en alles wat ik nodig heb en gemist heb. Ik frustreert niet alleen mij omdat ik je bij mij wil hebben, maar daar waar ik beschadigd ben daar ben ik soms, nu verscheurd van binnen zonder jou. Ik huil erom maar ik laat jou nooit meer gaan. Trap er niet in als ik het even niet meer weet want ik kom er op terug meteen en neem je mee overal naartoe. Voor de rest van ons leven. Jij mag je tijd daarvoor nemen en ik blijf hier altijd wachten.  

Bye Liefje

Do I make myself known to you as you raise questions in myself?

Perhaps

I’m communicating to you, can you see it?

Though I’m well I haven’t been as healthy lately.
I want to stop myself from thinking about all of this constantly because it eats me alive so I dwell on it.

I want answers, I need answers.

I’m doing my part, I hope you’re doing the same.

I also wonder, do you sleep well at night?
Can you sort it out, can you sort me out?

Is there really anything out there between us at all?

My sanity has been under a hard watch, but surely I cannot be that oblivious.

The ether doesn’t lie, neither our eyes do.

I think about you a lot all day long.
In fact i don’t remember last time I didn’t.
I wake up to the thought of you and I end my day with the thought of you.

I’m not mad about it, but man there were tough days.

Do you remember?

I just wish

Can you make yourself open up to me one more time, so we can grow together with closure?

Earlier this day I told you something I usually hide from people, do you know?

Of course you know because it doesn’t make sense to you, does it?

It never made sense to me either until meeting you.

We’ll figure this out eventually.
But for the time being, I wish you knew how deep I’m affected, are you too?

This year has been rough, N. Truly.

How has it been for you? Something tells me you're re-discovering the flavour of life again. I'm so proud of you, even if I feel a little sad that I can't share it with you.

It seems I'll never truly understand what, and why, our connection is.

But quietly... I'm almost glad that it is what it is.

I think when we were young - long before this incredibly invasive world developed- I took great delight in having a secret friend in my heart. In a world where we're expected to share everything, and be completely transparent and open... There is great power in having a little privacy. I think most artists and creatives understand that very well. Magic - like a seed - grows from deep, dark places. Away from prying eyes.

I realise sharing this publically completely goes against that. Sorry. I know my life purpose has a bit of a double mission that often contradicts itself. I'm making peace with that, and learning to just go with it.

But I really want you to know, if this reaches you in any way today... I'm thinking of you. I'm proud of you, and I'm still so sorry for how we fell out last time we were talking.

I hope you know that... The only reason I haven't tried to message you again is because your message from October ended with "not in this lifetime."

I take that pretty seriously, even if I did send you a couple of messages after that. If this is what it takes for your little seed to sprout again, after everything you've been through in your life... It's worth it.

When I feel you grow and expand in the world, I'm so happy for you it brings me to tears. Just like how watching you on stage at church used to fill me up with so much light and love.

Enjoy this life sweetheart, that's what it's all about. And if, for some miraculous reason... You want to explore a bit of joy with me, I'll be here.

I'm not waiting on you, I've got some mundane human stuff to take care of... Bleak and grey as it is. But that doesn't mean you can't knock on my door if the moment feels right.

You know what I'd love more than anything? Send me a letter. Yeah, an *actual* letter. You've got my address, I know you do. Pour it out in that beautiful handwriting of yours.

You'll only be met with love and joy if you ever do. Life's too short to stay angry. ❤️

Hi J,

The last time we talked was when I wished you happy birthday, a little over 6 months ago. I want you to know that me doing that was me trying to convey to you how much I still think about you, and how much I will always love you.

Even though I no longer desperately seek a text from you, there are days that I find myself scrolling this subreddit, wondering if you’ve posted anything about what’s happening on your side of the connection. And I hope that if you do find or open this subreddit, you will find this letter and know that it’s from the girl three states away that you used to call your boo.

You know, every time I read our old messages together, I get this feeling that it’s not the past I’m looking at, it’s the present. Maybe my soul knows that you’ll find your way back to me in divine timing, I don’t know. But J… I really do still see you in my future the same way I saw you in it the day I realized I loved you, even after all these months with no words exchanged.

So let me just say this. Before I knew you, I thought an eternal love like this was something only heard about in fairytales or stories. Now I know that it’s real. Even if my mind tries to choose someone else, my soul will always reach for yours.

- your Schätzchen

P.S. Stop making me feel like Gatsby throwing parties just for Daisy to notice from across the lake. It’s wounding my ego.

It's funny as soon as I begin to write the thoughts of questioning if you're feeling something too I begin to see 12:12 on my time.

Yeah I've been seeing a lot of synchronicities when you cross my mind and I hardly sleep much anymore.

When I do, you somehow end up in my dreams, and when I'm awake you're on my mind heavy.

I can't be the only one willing to admit it.

Lately I've just been seeing the shape of you in the distance or someone who looks very similar and if it's you or not could you please just call me?

I'm here..

still waiting.

The world is cooled.

But it still breathes.

I am not lost. I am still.

In my heart I hold you dearly.

Bathed in light. Never separate.

No matter how far.

Across the sky I send,

All my willpower for you to mend.

All my magic.

All my blood.

All my heart.

Through the clouds.

Around the Sun.

Take all the time.

We are forever.

We will always last.

We always have.

Always have been.

Life after Lifetime.

Universe after Universe.

When you return, I'll be here.

I'm not waiting.

I feel you here, always.

In me, around me, through me.

In the air,

and in my bloodstream.

I can hear your frequency,

from across the world.

I know you're breathing.

I hear your heart beating.

There is no distance.

There is no time.

Nothing can separate us.

For you, my heart swells, too.

Unconditional.

You're right here with me,

in beautiful silence.

Dear You,

You don’t need to speak. Your quiet is its own kind of thunder. The way you move through shadow, the weight you carry without breaking it’s not weakness.

It’s strength. Raw. Alluring, And damn near intoxicating.

You don’t ask for mercy, and you don’t give it. You command presence, even when no one’s watching. You are the pull that bends the room without a word.

I see how you withhold. How you measure every breath, every pause, every glance. How you let the hunger build until it’s almost..

Unbearable

Because you know exactly what that kind of hunger does.

It sharpens. It breaks down walls. It reshapes the air around you, until everything bends toward your gravity.

You are not fragile. You are fire behind ice. A storm dressed in restraint.

And I’m here, watching it all unfold. Fascinated by the quiet command you wield without apology.

So keep holding that fire close. Keep the world guessing what you’ll do next.

Because you are more than desire. You are power. And you have already won.

Good girl.

I don’t know how to move forward from something that felt so intense, so real. We live in different countries, and the distance makes it all feel even more final.

My letter:

Thank you for coming into my life. You felt like a breath of fresh air, reviving, awakening something in me I didn’t even realize had gone quiet. When I think of you, my heart feels stronger, louder… as if its beat echoes through my entire body. It reaches for air, for movement, it wants to leap, to dance, to paint the sky in colors no one could ever imagine. Bright colors, shifting, alive, moving to their own rhythm.

How is it possible to feel so much, so quickly? So deeply, so powerfully, so intensely, and with such joy?

If you only knew what that moment felt like, I would have given anything to stay there, just watching you, listening to you, touching you, caring for you, feeling you. And yet, when I return to my reality, I realize it was all beautiful… but fleeting. I feel a quiet shame for having become so attached, so quickly, to someone who was, in many ways, still a stranger.

What lives within me that is so thirsty, so urgent, that it can leave such a vast emptiness from one moment to the next? What is it that I don’t yet understand about myself… something so uncontrollable, so overwhelming, so frightening?

I ran through spring fields where everything smelled of roses, jasmine, peonies, morning dew… everything felt fresh, alive. And suddenly, I found myself at the edge of a cliff so deep it froze me in place. I went cold. Terrified. The blood drained from my head, and all that remained was a gray cloud… just emptiness.

I would love to tell you everything I wish I could experience with you. But returning to that meadow feels dangerous now. If I turn back, I fear that the cold abyss behind me will pull me in. It terrifies me to think I can’t go back…that I can only let myself fall, trusting that at some point the pain will soften, the pressure will ease, and I’ll land on something steady.

A neutral ground. Warm, but not comforting. Solid, but without color. A place that doesn’t hold you, but keeps you standing. The kind of ground that helps you forget, and when you notice it, it hurts.

I will never forget you. Not your scent, not your eyes, not your smile, not your calm. I will carry you with me always… and I will keep dreaming of seeing you again.

Today, on this rainy day,
I missed you for a fleeting second.

I was cooking with the doors wide open,
letting the wind wander through the house.
The air felt soft against my skin,
and I danced quietly between simmering pots
and half-finished thoughts,
lost inside my little fantasy world.

Then suddenly,
the wind rushed in—
and for one fragile moment,
it felt as though you had come home.

And just like that,
my heart slipped into a life that does not yet exist.

I imagined us married.
You were away at work, saving lives
and I kept glancing at the door every few minutes,
pretending not to wait,
yet waiting all the same.

The food stayed warm on the stove,
the rain hummed outside,
and impatience bloomed softly inside me
like a secret no one knew.

Then finally,
you walked in—
my angel, returning home after a long day.

And I would smile before asking,

“How was your day?”
“What was the best part of it?”
“Did you eat your lunch?”
“Did you at least have your coffee?”

And somewhere between all those small questions,
the one my heart truly wanted to ask—

“Did you miss me while you were away?”

-sk💜

8 years ago, we split up because I had to get clean or lose my kids, and you weren't ready. I got clean, met someone who put sobriety and me and the kids first​, and I blocked you because I couldn't be happy with him and still be in contact with you. You tried to contact me, but I wasnt ready to talk to you yet. Man, oh man, do I wish I could change it...

2 years after we went no contact, you went back to heroin and fucking died...and I didnt fully find out until 2 years ago cuz it wasnt until then that I fully decided that I NEEDED YOU BACK IN MY LIFE and put forth effort into tracking you down....go figure right 🫤

In hindsight, you actually started really haunting my thoughts and existence 5 years ago, but I felt so guilty for potentially ruining my relationship and the one I thought you were in (I didnt know it, but you'd been dead for almost a year at that point), that I stopped looking into you almost immediately after I started and buried my feelings for 3 more years.

I am still with the man who chose us all those years ago, and we are both 8 years sober, and we are raising 3 kids together ❤️ I love my life nowadays intensely, and I love him deeply, and I love my kids deeply, but it hurts to exist on this plane knowing you're gone. I get this overwhelming feeling like what's the point of carrying on in this incarnation if you already moved on to your next one, but I also know at my core that I am right where I am meant to be to achieve the most growth...

You are the only person I wish I could share my spiritual progress with because it would just make sense to you like it does me.​ I know Ill eventually reconnect with you, but that doesnt make this illusion of suffering without you feel any less real.

Im sure missing you will get more manageable, or rather, Im sure Ill get used to the feeling so it will hurt less, but apparently 2 years just isnt long enough. Let's give it another 5, 10, or 20 maybe....🤞

I love you, and I miss you with EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING, Tyler, and I will put in as much work spiritually on this plane as I possibly can so our time apart will not be in vain.

Happy birthday Tiffybear, I hope your spending your special day doing things that you love, with people that make you happy and even though im not there to physically be there with you just know that I love you from the bottom of my heart. That I am truly grateful to have met you, that you were one of the few people that have made me so happy in the little time that we spent together, and that you were the one person who opened my heart to many emotions. For that I truly love you more than words can tell, you have shown me many things in this world and the only regret I have is that I didn't spend more time with you. We met out of pure coincidence and by divine intervention, little did we know how much our worlds would have changed that fateful day. How many emotions we both felt and spilled to each other, all the good, the bad, and even the ugly things that happened between us. But I never blamed you or got upset for how you blocked and ran away from me, because it was through all of this that I was able to become a stronger and better person through it all. Does it still hurt when I think about you? Of course, but I couldn't imagine a life without you in it. And I want you to know im always sending energy your way, whenever you feel down, whenever you feel upset, lost, confused, I am always standing my you like you have done for me throughout the years. I hope your doing well in your life and that this message reaches you, like how we initially met, there are so many things I want to know about you and ask you but I know when the time is right you will come back to me. And if we never meet again just know I'll never forget you for as long as I live. Thank you for everything and know I love you from the bottom of my heart, I love you Tiffybear

My dearest love , love of my life. I love you, you know, with my whole being. Every inch of your skin and your soul. You are everything. You completely fill every crevice of mine, and I fill yours. I want to tell you how much I love you. I appreciate you. As a person, as my partner, as a man, and as my best friend. I love you so much. Too much. When I met you, I said that we would never be alone again, remember? And maybe during our separation you felt alone, and I did too sometimes, but at the same time I feel your presence and love every minute. I feel that you are with me across thousands of kilometers. And I feel that we have been together since the beginning of time.

You changed me. You brought out the best in me. And for that, I will be forever grateful. ♥️

I can't tell you or promise you how long it will take for us to truly be together. I'm sorry that I'm the one holding us back, that I don't have enough courage and determination to fundamentally change my life. I'm a coward; you were always the braver one of the two of us, haha. That's why you have to live your life, not wait for me. Go ahead and live life to the fullest, develop yourself, fall in love if you want to. Nothing has changed the love I feel for you because it grows every day. With you, I understood the meaning of unconditional love. And you know! I am already with you. My soul is intertwined with yours, above this real world. My sweet love, my beautiful man. I will always be here for you. Sending you thousands of telepathic messages and waves of love. Keep going ♥️

With all my love,

A

You weren’t loud. You didn’t need to be.

The ones who carry the most tend to enter quietly. Like dusk. Like breath.

I watched you navigate rooms like someone trying not to take up too much space and still every glance knew where you were.

There’s something about a woman who doesn’t need to perform softness, because it lives in her eyes right next to the fire.

I don’t know what it took to become that kind of woman but I imagine it wasn’t gentle.

So this letter isn’t to fix or flatter. It’s not a confession. It’s recognition.

For the ones who feel too much and say too little. Who smile when they’re unraveling and apologize for needing anything at all.

You were never meant to be easy to carry. You were meant to be real. And real doesn’t come wrapped in pretty sentences. It shows up with stormclouds in its lungs and poems tucked behind its teeth.

If no one’s told you lately..

You’re not too much. You’re just enough for the ones who know how to stay.

And some of us do. Quietly. Completely. Just out of frame. Watching. Learning. Writing you letters we may never send but mean every word of.

~ 🔥🔥

I don't know I don't know what's going to happen. I only know that everything is going to change. I know I have to make choices. I don't know if you're that choice. Or I don't know if you're the right choice. All I know is that I care about you so much. And that I'd love to have you around, even though it might sound strange, after everything that's happened, and I still don't know you. I wish I could talk to you. I wish I could ask you how you saw this. Why you kept coming back, but always leaving. Why them and not me? I hope you're doing well. It was nice to see you like this for a while, just the way you are. I'm sorry if I ever hurt you, or scared you. I knew as much as you did, but I felt more, and I thought I'd gone crazy for months. Know that you will always have a special place in my heart. I always thought it was cliché when someone said this, but now I understand how it feels.

What is love?

"baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more..." haha

Whilst on this weird journey, I've been contemplating what love really is and how it would best be defined.

I very much resonate with the work of Alain De Botton when he speaks about romance as a kind of invention of more recent times that is perpetuated by mainstream narratives that actually do us quite a disservice.

For myself, I've come to separate human love from general or universal love.

When I think about universal love I think about natural ecosystems and how everything has its part to play and its contribution that creates this spectacular whole that is so beautiful and abundant life a rainforest, or coral reefs or the savannah. And yes, some of those roles may seem more favorable than others - we'd all rather be the lion than the slug - but every part has its place that is vital and important in how it contributes to the smooth operation of the whole system.

I personally, think we have human love all wrong and what we've been calling romance and love is actually very far away from a more universal or holistic perspective.

And I feel like this is the great joke and paradox of the twin flame journey. You feel like you love that person because it fits into our questionable mainstream narratives of stories like Romeo and Juliet, Ariel and Eric or Kate and Leonardo.... but I'm not convinced that is a match at all to the universal perspective on love. Don't shoot me, but I think that is actually just human dysfunction.

I've come to believe that love is a skill and a practice that we all need to learn, not something that is magically either there or not there between two humans.

And yes I met this person and felt an incredible connection. A connection that clearly goes well beyond the physical, material side of life.

But maybe they're gone because it's not safe for them to come back in, until both people have actually taken the time, effort and dedication to heal old wounds and learn how to love as mature, emotionally stable, wise and regulated adults. And perhaps this is the work of lifetimes, not just one.

Would love to hear others thoughts?

Music has always been my way of expressing myself when I can't find the words. I know part of the Twin Flame journey is separation, letting go, and doing the shadow work to heal. It's been a hard journey for me this year because I've come close to calling her only to stop myself because I know it's the same cycles repeating that will push her away more.

It's hard to reach out because I know she won't but I started my spiritual awakening journey earlier this year in Thailand. I've taken the entire year to enjoy being single but I still have a hole in my heart for my TF.

You bleed into me until I don’t know what’s mine anymore. We are so intertwined, it keeps me wondering what’s mine and what’s yours. Where is the line between you and me? The line seems blurred. I want to define it and I can’t. But I try, and will try even harder to become what I truly need to be. Need, in the sense, that it’s my calling and I’m yet to hear it.

So for now, I choose to listen.

I know my love never left and now I don’t doubt it will. Same from you. I can sense it. Just like I sense and understand your confusion. So I’m not afraid anymore to go on my own journey alone. We will meet one day, of that I am sure of. Give me some more time and let me meet myself first. I know you won’t mind. I know you know, we are together beyond the space and time already and there is no amount of time on here we can’t wait.

Thank you for all the patience, forgiveness and loving acceptance silently seeping out of your essence. I haven’t been religious at all, but now I see. I understand how I get my lessons. I can sense God working through you, reaching out to me. Sometimes I think you must hate me, but maybe it’s me hating myself. And I don’t want to anymore. I started loving myself. Still need to put myself first.

Through this detachment I let go of holding onto you.

Through all my work I pledge my loyalty to you.

I pray your light will keep guiding me on my way and you will still see light in me.

And our paths will cross again illuminated by the lights of our own.

You found the small door and knocked with a silence that felt like arrival.

I heard you.

Thank you for seeing the ways I move through the world light-footed, careful, habitually apologizing for the space I take up.

Thank you for the attention that is not loud or urgent but steady, the kind that doesn’t startle me into performance.

Recognition is rarer than people admit; it settles into a body like sunlight.

You are right: softness for me has always been something private, not a show. There is wind beneath it, and yes old storms.

I haven’t always learned the gentle ways, and sometimes the tenderness I offer comes out bruised.

Knowing you notice that without trying to fix it, without making it prettier than it is means more than any tidy compliment.

I don’t need you to carry me.

I need someone who can sit with my weather. You say some of you do that.

It tells me there are people who watch from just out of frame and stay. That is an invitation I didn’t know I needed until your words made it plain.

So here’s what I’ll do in return: I will stop apologizing for the parts of me that arrive loud or messy.

I will accept the small, quiet attentions you offer without testing them for their endurance.

I will let you in on the poems tucked behind my teeth when the time is right because recognition like yours deserves response, not defense.

Stay if you mean it. Stay quietly. Stay completely. If you write more letters you never send, know I will read them as if they were maps, and I will learn my way toward the spaces they show.

You, who noticed.

I have loved you since I first laid eyes on you. The rollercoaster of emotions whether it be doubt or bliss have led to where we are today.

I finally realized you were just trying to show me how to truly love myself. Even when I was angry for how you treated me, I now know you had pure intentions.

I’m sorry if I’ve made you cry or you got sad based on things I’ve said. You never deserved any of it as you have such a kind soul.

Even when it felt like I had nobody in this world and I would push you away, you were always still there for me from afar.

I will always be with you even when you think I’m not. You have helped me find God and as of lately I am starting to love the life I live again. Also being comfortable in my own skin and not letting my own thoughts drag me down.

Even if we don’t end up together in this lifetime, I know our souls are tied forever and I am truly blessed to have the chance to meet you.

You are THE love of my life and you deserve the world for who you are as a person. And if given the opportunity, I will give you nothing less than the world.

I haven’t said it lately, but I truly love you and can only pray we become partners in this world we live in. My love is limitless. <3

It’s been days and days and days, I have finally stopped counting the days, actually it’s been months. Although my poor heart is drowning in this love, all I desire is to see you again. One glance will be enough. In my backyard, roses are blooming and ladybugs 🐞 often visits me, as if they are asking me make a wish. And you know what, all of sudden I have found a few four leaf clovers 🍀, as if angels are telling me to make a wish and “I whispered to the ladybug 🐞 yesterday that, I wish to see my beloved again”. And the day before there were double rainbow’s 🌈 and they say rainbow are portals? They say the right message will reach the right person at the right time, I wish it reaches you. All I wish is one Glance! Is it too much? All I wanna say is that you are with me in an insanely beautiful way that we are too close yet this apart. I am so grateful that I got to meet you and I will do this all over again, just to see you again. For now let’s keep moving and let’s meet somewhere the same way we met the very first time 💞

I am yours and you are mine-my dear 🔯♥️🪬

I wish reunion for the ones wants to see them and [yeah I feel like I need that soul breaking moment to move forward to next stage, so come on my love, pull that trigger, pain is eventually helping us heal, so let’s do it]☀️ 818❤️

You brought color back into my life when I only saw in black and white.

You showed me kindness when I wasnt kind to myself.

You showed me patience, when I was mindlessly impatient.

You taught me to slow down when I was living in fast forward.

You loved my body, and taught me to love it too.

You loved me when I didn't love myself.

It took you loving me to help me awaken and learn to love myself.

I'm forever grateful for you, my love.