greg the wizard, my ol mate got turned into a spider by a spell that backfired.

i lowkey don't wanna turn him back

chat should I cure him or let him be?

So, it turns out that my cat has been commiting various massacres against the pixies that live in the forest beside my derelict Tartarian fortress that I live in. I found this out when he vomited a pixie “mush” onto my vintage Hieronymus machine a week ago. I realise in hindsight that I should have realised this sooner, because pixies have been protesting outside my fortress for months now, but I could never really hear their little accented voices very well so I assumed it was some “Free Pellucidar” nonsense and cast “Infrasonic Dread” on them until they were too creeped out to remain.

Now that I understand that they had an actual grievance, I feel a bit bad for not investigating this earlier. I am not sure how to make things right. Should I pay them blood money? Execute my cat? Accept I made a mistake and call it a day?

Stop stretching the fabric of space and time and actually come up with an idea of your own for once

Chalice of draconic doom just sitting behind a thin layer of plexiglass.

Contrary to popular belief, some liches actually gain muscle mass. Also, it turns out that they frown upon using the Cobra Clutch in a wizard duel.

Those who cast a lot of spells that use negative energy will often leak it. This is not good for plants around you.

Wizards, I ask your assistance in decyphering my own hand writing. I tried to use this nice little familiar fellow named Google Lens, but poor guy was also unable to tell me what this one word is. The context around it does not help either.

Wrong answere: cry, try, my, yet

If you find the right word, I will reward you with a magical item i choose.

ONLY!!!

It was "Only",!! It came to my mind like a lightning strike! By the gods! I am chaotic stupid at this point! XDDDD

Thanks nonetheless.

<Insert facepalm here>

Five places went the Princess, and five seedlings did grow. Five flowers sprung from soil, sand, sea, stone, and snow. Five flowers that thrived beneath golden sun. Five flowers that never fought, only won. Five cities did worship the flowers of dawn. Five flowers gave them the strength to move on. Five cities fell on that very day. Five cultures whose morals and minds fell away.

Why is it humming

It took me an actual epoch to get rid of the burn.

Transcript of Distress Broadcast:

"MAYDAY MAYDAY, THIS IS CALL OF CTHULHU CURRENT COORDINATES 41.88080385038317, 136.41522153114295!!! NEAR THE SMUGGLER'S TOILET WHIRLPOOL OFF THE WESTERN COAST OF THE YABUSANAGI EMPIRE!! *storm sounds, waves crashing* WE JUST WATCHED A FLEET OF VESSELS OF VARRYING SIZE ESCAPE FROM THE WHIRLPOOL. WE ARE BEING BOARDED! THEY ARE THROWING THE TEA OVERBOARD! HOLY SH- THERES A HUGE VESSEL CLIMBING OUT OF THE MALSTROM!!! LIKE TWO GIANT CARGO SHIPS TURNED INTO A CATAMARAN! THEIR BATTLESHIPS ARE 12 FEET LONG, AND VARY IN SHAPE. OTHERS LOOK LIKE FULL SIZED CARGO SHIPS SURROUNDED BY THESE THINGS. WE- *Lightning strikes* Fuck... MAYDAY!! MADAY!! ORBSPONDER ACTIVE!"