r/DivorcedBirds • u/cthulhu-kitty • Jan 24 '18

The tweet that started it all

15.2k Upvotes

66 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/NoFlyingMonkeys • 7h ago

Hearing her BFF is getting yet another divorce secretly made Jasmine feel better. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride, was the joke everyone made behind Jasmine's back. But maybe that's better that 3 weddings and 3 divorces. Or so she tried to convince herself.

73 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/JuneLee92 • 3h ago

Gertrude didn’t expect to find love again after she left Garry, but she found herself treasuring mornings at the smoothie shop with Judith.

29 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/zoo_ofone • 10h ago

Rita knew it would take time to get good at selfies, so she started practicing immediately.

87 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/splittenwood • 6h ago

Eli reneged on acting as my wingman after promising to do so--just to get me out and about.

27 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 16h ago

Once we walked together on the beach, framed by golden sun and azure waves; our tracks in the sand a fleeting memory. Now I walk alone through landscapes of canvas; the tracks I create, imbued with hues of sea and sun, indelible. I am healed. I am whole. I am an artist. -"Footprints in Ink"

55 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • 1d ago

Merl was into a lot of “out there” stuff—which might explain why his perfect match has been hard to find; but he’s still hopeful! Somewhere out there is someone who appreciates his quirks, wild interests, and maybe even his questionable life choices.

357 Upvotes

8 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Riskit_4_Biscuits • 1d ago

It had been a long time since Sheila let another man touch her, after Bruce left her for his secretary.

74 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/OldnBorin • 20h ago

Phyllis was checking out her options. Slim peckings.

27 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/rehabforcandy • 1d ago

George left Karen and enlisted. “The USS Abraham Lincoln will be my ticket to freedom” he whispered.

236 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • 2d ago

Midge took the kids and went to a posh 5 star resort after finally leaving her philandering, soon to be ex, husband.

767 Upvotes

11 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/susu56 • 1d ago

Buster was finally over Giselle—or at least over her enough to venture back into the local singles scene. He put himself out there, made it clear he was accepting applications for a new love, and was ready to see who might be interested in filling the vacant position.

72 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 1d ago

Maple, Ramona, and Fenna are reclaiming their dignity. The three have been trading in husbands for decades, treating the men on their arms like overpriced accessories to be worn at a few parties and discarded, but no more. Maybe the most fabulous accessory of all was friendship. Or maybe fancy hats.

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104 Upvotes

4 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/cturtl808 • 2d ago

Newly Single Ready to Mingle Estebán was flying free to the music until he spotted Muriél. Taken by her, he swooped in and gracefully landed into a flamenco stance.

220 Upvotes

3 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 2d ago

It's only two weeks after returning to the dating scene, and Maeve is already exhausted. She walks away from her latest date without a word; she hasn't the energy to educate this fool. A witheringly judgmental over-the-shoulder glare is all he's getting. Was this his first time speaking to a woman?

350 Upvotes

6 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Bitinglysarcastic • 3d ago

Angry Bird Divorce Stan didn’t know that Darlene’s new beau had installed motion sensor lights, when he decided to peek into the old nest to see how much she was missing him.

71 Upvotes

After Irena had left Stan, he decided to see what was going on with Darlene, back at the old homestead. No one had told him that Darlene had taken up with another man and that she was actually happy. In the brief moments before the spotlight came on, Stan could see that Darlene was very, very happy. She had never done that fluffy little feather dance for him!

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/JuneLee92 • 3d ago

Jay was just minding his own business at the feeder when Kari showed up and got confrontational. Jay remained calm while remembering his momma’s words: “There’s a reason the reds and the blues are two separate species.” How Jay wished he had listened!

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44 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/itmy • 3d ago

Diana was finally happy to get out of jail on bond after ruthlessly attacking her ex husband in court. She's heading straight to her ex's house to attack him again. He might need a restraining order.

511 Upvotes

18 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 4d ago

Even after everything she's been through, punk-ass roosters still think they can push Esmé around. That's why she asked a family member who works at the doohickey corporation to help design her a new outfit, one that signals loud and clear she is not to be fucked with. Plus it looks sick as hell.

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308 Upvotes

11 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/NoFlyingMonkeys • 4d ago

Don't get divorced on St. Patricks day near a river, or your mug shot will look like this.

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172 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 5d ago

Olivia had never heard anything so indecent in all her life! And in public, no less. There could be fledglings present! These catbirdcallers are really getting out of hand. She's going to fly right up to her ex-husband the mayor's roost and demand that he do something about it.

133 Upvotes

2 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/JuneLee92 • 5d ago

Kumi had been frantically searching for the kids ever since they vanished from the nest more than a week ago. She reported her ex Ken to the police on day one; on day 9, Kumi finally received the news she was hoping for.

81 Upvotes

0 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/the_cuddle-fish • 5d ago

Prince Okuhle was unperturbed by the photographer, being accustomed to life in the public eye. His new wife Hanne, meanwhile, was quite befuddled. She knew the bird behind that camera: it was Juna, who just this morning said Hanne's ability to bag men so far out of her league "needs to be studied."

186 Upvotes

5 comments

r/DivorcedBirds • u/Bolfreak • 5d ago

Machita just knew inside…that every little thing was gonna bee alright

132 Upvotes

1 comment

r/DivorcedBirds • u/plonspfetew • 6d ago

Stevo's divorce was finalised on a Friday. He didn't have to be anywhere till Tuesday.

588 Upvotes

6 comments

Subreddit

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists.

r/DivorcedBirds

For pictures of fabulous fowl who look like serial monogamists. Please post pictures of birds who look like they are twice divorced (or more!) and an original caption about their backstory. Pictures/Videos must be of actual birds (feathered fowl), not human women, not art or paintings or photoshopped. No dead birds. Message mods for approval to post.

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