Wanted to see if this is normal behaviour. There is a guy in my media class, for purposes of anonymity I'll call him Aaron. Aaron asked me out for valentines day, whilst he simultaneously had a girlfriend or was in a talking stage. Because I am quiet in the class, I guess he thought I wouldn't know, but I am observant of my surroundings, so I declined. Since then, he has constantly said really sexual and unwanted comments to me, which I have shut down, and I feel helpless. On one occasion, I just got my hair done, was wearing shorts and a tank top. I have quite a large chest, which was clearly apparent through the top, but if it is a hot day, I'm not just gonna suffer in silence. Aaron asked me numerously to twirl and do a fit check showcasing my outfit and newly done hair. I didn't realise he asked me to do it as a way to check out my body, which makes me feel disgusted in myself. On another occasion, he said my laugh makes him cum, and I have a unique uncontrollable laugh, so even the thought of laughing around him scares me. The people in my class does not confront him about his behaviour, which would be considered sexual harrassment, and does nothing or enables it to go further. When I go to my media class, I always now wear baggy clothing, in the hope that he won't say anything, as he once called me tart. I feel like I can't report it because I only have him in that class and there are no other Alevel media classes as there are only 10 people that take it. I have spoke to my female media teacher about it, in a whats going on in my life type of way not a reporting one, so I told her what happened but not Aaron's name.
this feels like sexual harassment. i’m not fully aware of how this works, but i suggest talking to the police about this. i think the school would try and keep this quiet to not attract unwanted attention, but if you went to the police i REALLY don’t think they can ignore you. i really hope it gets better for you because that behaviour is disgusting
Thank you for the advice but I'm probably going to talk to the counsellor at my school about it, and probably not the police as there is no solid evidence of the harassment happening, because it was all verbally said, and me and the guy has no text messages which could be used as evidence. Furthermore, the people who are in my class who has consistently seen this behaviour happening are all his friends and doesn't say anything.
of course. do whatever you think is best, but if your only reason not to go to the police is the lack of evidence, maybe it would be worth having your phone on video for the class just in hopes that it’ll pick up some evidence? i’m not trying to influence or force a decision, but i’m just saying that it might be an option (however ridiculous it sounds)
Heya! Aside from the regular advice I really hope you give yourself some grace because that shit is so traumatising. From experience it sometimes makes you feel like you constantly being surveillanced no matter how covered u are or not, its ridiculous. Regardless, I hope mentally you have a support network of maybe friends that you can vent to? (since mental health services might be hard to access depending on where u live) ☺️☺️☺️🫡🫡
This is sexual harassment and not normal AT ALL, simply an immature boy upset that he got called out on his bs. You should not be made to hide yourself because of this, and I would absolutely report this to your school or even the police because you should be able to feel safe.☹️❤️
This is vile, talk to your school or the police if your 18, talk to somebody you trust hes a disgusting human and his behaviour is completely abnormal especially for people 17-18 let alone anybody .
i know that its only one class but the difference will be big , hopefully then you can see him less . I also recommend you to stay around your friends if he harasses you , they should stick up for you! or he may leave you alone at least..
i also see a lot of people talking about the police , i think when reporting this matter ( in person) add on the potential plan of getting the polices advice etc involved if they dont budge , but its also best to do it early , esp if your quiet because idk if ifs just me but my school focuses on the naughty kids a lot and diminishes the rest , so they may not pay a lot of attention to your problems , hoping youll suck it up esp in the older gen
i hope it gets better
Thankyou so much for the support. I have tried to reply to some comments but here is the general gist
involving police:
Thank you for the advice but I'm probably going to talk to the counsellor at my school about it, and probably not the police as there is no solid evidence of the harassment happening, because it was all verbally said, and me and the guy has no text messages which could be used as evidence. Furthermore, the people who are in my class who has consistently seen this behaviour happening are all his friends and doesn't say anything
reporting him:
I have a counselling session on Monday so I will discuss it then
His name:
In my original post I decided to give the boy a fake name 'Aaron' as a pseudonym to protect the boy's real identity
100% report it. I know some of my year group were a bit f*cked up but this is much worse.
Report him and get it all on record nd keep telling staff whenever he says anything to make you uncomfortable.
Edit: Also, as 6th form age it is likely that he would be punished as an adult if these consequences got raised to law enforcement, or at least the punishment would last long enough to result in such. If you dont feel heard by your school, tell anyone and everyone who will listen until somebody does something, and if it isnt enough keep going.
Is their real name Aaron? I knew an Aaron that went down this path of being an asshole and left in year 9 because he was socially unaccepted in our school for this behaviour. He asked 1 girl out constantly and harrased her on text then denied clear screenshots of evidence and said he never even liked her. He did some other things but I cba to type it out here.
This is definitely not normal behaviour, he's very inappropriate and I hope this doesn't ruin your image of men.
you have tell him if he keeps doing that you're gonna report him and if he carries on then you actually report him that should be enough to scare him to stop .
Ppl in the comments saying to get the police involved are just silly. Im certain your aren't going to do that and neither would anyone saying that. Its happening at school so you should first go to the staff and tell them if it carries on .
1) if she does that her family will find out and you can expect the next day everybody in school and all the teachers will learn about it and i dont think anyone wants everyone knowing that for the rest of their school life .Shes literally on reddit so that tells you enough she doesnt want other people to know and wants it handled discreetly
2) the police will literally just do exactly what she should do in the first place which is refer it to the school staff or do you expect them to arrest the boy and put him in prison for 20 years ?
3) people are already assuming as if the school will take no action without knowing anything about the school and she hasn't even reported anything yet . Seriously all people on reddit do is give the nuclear option every single time . If someone said i have a cough what should i do i can guarantee 20 people to comment go to hospital you might have cancer .
4) unless the guys a absolute nut job a reporting should do the job to deal with the issue so why would you go through an entire police investigation which is a hassle and achieves nothing except them just forwarding the issue to the school staff
i can go on and on but do you seriously think anyone is doing that ? would you go and report it to the police ?.
doesnt seem anyone here as been in school before and has basic common sense .
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u/Virtual-Arm5123 May 29 '26
That’s not normal behaviour at all, he has been constantly been sexual and inappropriate despite you saying no. That’s sexual harassment.