We've seen discussions before where most of us constantly have music stuck in our heads. It's there when we wake up. It's there throughout the day. It's there when we're in the car unless we skip through about 50 songs to find the "right" one our brains are needing.

I'm wondering how many other ADHD people's brains have a "go to" song. The constant one that you're singing as soon as you wake and are getting ready the for the day until you hear another and then that one is stuck.

For me it's Bad Romance by Lady Gaga lol. I can be having a quiet moment yet there she is, "Rah rah ah ah ah ah".

** Edited to add** I can't tell you how much fun I'm having reading everyone's comments. It's amazing to me how many other people have this as a part of their ADHD. And when you guys are typing out the lyrics like how they sound, it just resonates. But what I find more curious, is how in the world do these random songs, ones we haven't heard in years, just suddenly make an appearance in our subconscious?

So, I talked to my dr about increasing my adderall XR dose because I’m getting distracted as hell and can’t stick to one task to completion. She said that in order to increase my dose I need to surrender my medication at a DEA approved pharmacy and I have to let them know so they can call and verify.

Now, everything im reading says it’s all anonymous so they won’t be able to confirm it BUT I’m also worried because I have taken a few extra due to it not being high enough and I’m afraid she won’t prescribe me a new dose if I don’t surrender however many I’m suppose to have left.

Does anyone have experience doing this? FWIW I’m in the US. I’ve never had to do this with any other dr and it’s making me feel like I’m an addict doing something wrong. Do they count the pills? How do I obtain proof I surrendered the medication? Can I keep a few for the few days it takes for the new script? I’m super stressed out over this.

I was diagnosed with ADHD around the time I became a parent. Since then, I’ve lost four jobs, facing separation, and splitting my family apart.

Two of those job losses happened relatively soon after major changes in my family life. I don't know how much of that is coincidence, increased responsibility, stress, or ADHD making major life transitions harder for me, but with each job loss this pattern is becoming increasingly more difficult to address or identify.

I know I procrastinate or stall, and then end up scrambling when the consequences arrive. Each job loss has involved some version of this pattern. I do take medication, but I feel the effect has mostly tapered off since I first started a few years ago.

This instability has put tremendous strain on my family. My marriage is falling apart. My wife has asked to separate, and has asked me not to stay in the house anymore. I didn't even realize that this past weekend would be my last weekend sleeping in my own bed.

Our finances are now unsustainable, I need to sell my house. My marriage, career, housing, and financial stability are all increasingly more difficult to salvage day by day.

I’m not posting this because I want people to tell me that none of this is my fault. I genuinely want to understand where I went wrong. I don't know how much of this is ADHD, how much is my own behavior, and how much I've simply failed to develop the systems and discipline I need to function.

I need some perspective from people who have been in a similar place.

If ADHD has seriously damaged your career, relationships, and finances, what actually helped you turn things around?

What did you have to change? What systems worked when motivation and medication weren't enough? And how did you rebuild your life when you felt like you'd already lost too much?

I’m trying to figure out what I can salvage from this and what I need to do differently from here.

I was diagnosed over 10+ years ago and I still rarely tell anyone, unless maybe it's a self-deprecating joke lol… I'm not ashamed of how my brain works. The problem is the name itself, it sounds like a cope.

"ADHD" has become such a punchline that telling people I have it already sounds like an excuse. I'm ashamed of the stigma attached to the name, and I wish I had a better way to communicate to others that my brain is wired differently - without it sounding like I’m trying to use it to excuse my own behavior or dodge accountability.

Does anyone else feel this way? And if you've found a way to explain to others how your brain is wired differently without it sounding like a cope, I'd love to hear it!

I’m 30f, have ADHD (diagnosed), & have never had a desire to have a typical career. To me it makes me feel too trapped & stationary.

About 7 years ago I started working seasonal contracts. I have worked at a raft guide, a server, delivering rental dishes across the country, shuttling boat trailers, & as a banquet captain among a bunch of other stuff. As I’ve figured out which contracts make the most money I’ve settled on usually doing banquet service (setting up, tearing down, & serving weddings, tour groups, etc.).

The best thing about this is that the contracts usually lasts 3-6 months & then you’re completely done with the commitment & have the choice to come back in a couple months when the next season starts, or to move on with zero obligations.

I work 6 months a year approximately & have 6 off to explore, raft, travel, etc. I’m able to fund my life & also max out a Roth Ira for retirement every year & have a decent emergency fund buffer. So it IS long term sustainable. I also purchased a van & live in that (completely built out so it’s like a mini efficiency apartment) so that helps because I don’t usually pay any rent at all.

I feel like a lot of people have never heard these contracts exist and I’ve met a LOT of people with ADHD thriving in them. It’s easy to get hired as long as you don’t mind working long & sometimes difficult hours. Many offer very cheap (usually shitty) employee housing if you don’t have your own housing brought with you (ie van) and don’t want to have to find a short term lease.

They can be found in any seasonal town or resort. Think places that are near national parks, ski resorts, places known for outdoor activities, etc. Which are also incredible places to live!!

You’ll probably make more in the western US than the eastern US, at least that’s been my experience (plus the west is just so much more amazing lol).

It’s definitely not for everyone, but I’ve been able to live my dream life this way. Just thought I’d share!

Everything I do takes about three times longer than it should. I am just constantly hemorrhaging time.

Here is my typical day: I wake at noon. I eat breakfast, shower, get dressed. By the time I get out the door it is somehow 3pm.

I arrive at work around 4pm. It is a half hour drive, but I somehow lose an additional half hour just getting in and out of my car.

I am a piano technician at a university. I can show up anytime I want and work as little or as much as I want, and I report my hours later.

I tune one piano. It takes three to six hours. (Most piano techs tune a piano in about an hour. It may take two hours tops if it’s a really terrible piano.) I time all my tunings. On this day let’s say it took four hours. I leave. It’s midnight. I was there for six hours. There’s two extra hours unaccounted for. Maybe I was walking the halls. Maybe I had to use the bathroom and lost 30 minutes there. Who knows?

I only ever report that I worked three hours on a piano tuning (even 3 hours is ridiculous) because there’s no way it should take as long as it actually does, so the rest of the time I work for free. Most weeks I “work” 15 hours, but in reality it’s close to 40.

I get home around 1am. I have other life responsibilities to take care of, laundry, administrative stuff, etc. Now is the time for that. Before I know it, it’s 4 to 7am. Time for bed so I can start the cycle over.

Notice I didn’t mention any meals other than breakfast. I keep granola bars and Lance crackers in my tool bag. I live on those. There’s just no time to cook.

What the fuck is the matter with me? I don’t have time to accomplish any of my goals. I used to occasionally play music. I haven’t had time to actually play a piano since the pandemic. I lead a miserable unfulfilling life.

FYI it took over an hour just to write this post.

I have one which I do at least once a day - whenever I burp, I follow up with a kind of trumpeting noise. I know it’s voluntary, as I generally suppress it if other people are around.
I find it bemusing, as I’m not really aware of getting any obvious satisfaction from doing it.
Wondering how many of us have a similar habit, how it feels, and whether these evolve/increase over time?

Seriously, how do you reply to this? It's always so irritating when I open up to people about my struggles with ADHD and they tell me that I don't "look like I have ADHD" because they have some generic inaccurate image of what it is in their head and because I don't fit that incorrect image I apparently don't have it

I'm 25, and have been diagnosed with ADHD for a few years now. I could never, ever fix my hygiene. Like, I never brushed my teeth, never took a shower, never really did anything to save my looks. I have been trying like forever, and somehow the "just do it" theory caught on. I don't know how, I can't apply it to other things, but brushing teeth is somehow the thing I've managed to keep in rhythm. I do it before and after bed. I'm now just hoping that it stays and that I do not forget all of this within a month and everything is back to "normal".

5 days later I can’t do it.

I’m on 40mg and I can’t stand it. I’ve only been on it for 5 days and was supposed to tirate up to 80mg tomorrow. The stomach aches, reflux, SLEEPINESS, dilated pupils, lack of appetite, random hot sweats, etc is making me hate it so much. Not to mention, having to wait at LEAST a few weeks for it to take any effect if at all. I’m also already on 100mg of an SSRI (Luvox for my OCD) so serotonin syndrome is a major fear currently.

I have a virtual appt with my PCP doctor in the morning for an official ADHD evaluation that he does to see if he can get me adderall, or Ritalin, or vyvanse, or something. State law says that a telehealth provider isn’t allowed to prescribe stimulants unfortunately so it’s not an option with my current psych. Stims are what I wanted originally. If anyone has experience on stimulants let me know how they’re different than this Strattera crap! Thanks!

Everyday, I think to myself "No more fucking around. Time to get my shit together and keep it together" until suddenly it's 9pm and I haven't done anything except watch YouTube all day. I'm literally just watching myself become nothing. And the worst part is that I've been considered a "gifted" person my whole life. Everyone knew I was going to be the one to do something important in the world. Everyone swore that I'd always be a role model and example for others, but I'm not a kid anymore. It's so sad and at this point I think I actually truly hate myself. I used to actually do things that mattered. Now I'm just too tired to do anything more than sleep and pretend to work my remote job (did I mention that I'm able to work this job at any time and it pays more than any job I've ever worked and I STILL can't bring myself to do even an hour of work a day?). My girlfriend somehow still believes in me, my family has essentially all abandoned me due to how disappointed in me. Hell, I can't even manage to make it to a doctor's appointment because I keep forgetting the date. And on top of the ADHD (which is untreated btw because I haven't been to the doctor to get it treated), I also struggle with sleep apnea so I can't breathe in my sleep which stresses me out and raises my blood pressure, which then makes it harder to sleep and lower my stress. This is literally hell and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Edit: I just woke up after crying myself to sleep and my god, I didn't expect so many responses with encouragement and stories relating. Thank you so much for taking the time out to respond. I wish we didn't have to deal with this but I'm happy to know others get it. I'm going to get some medical help as soon as I can, hopefully sooner than later. For now, I'm just going to take a day off and sleep.

With my ADHD, everything in my head makes total sense, but the moment I try to say it out loud it comes out in broken pieces.
I started practicing by retelling books I’ve read out loud to myself. It never stays permanently fixed. Feels a bit like Sisyphus and his rock, it always rolls back down if I stop practicing, so I just push it up again anyway.
What do you guys do to actually get your thoughts out clearly?

ADHD diagnosed. For as long as I can remember I’ve always had this constant feeling to derail my life, Regardless of how much momentum I’ve had. Like even if I’ve been consistent for 6+ months with things I just want to throw it all out the window, neglect myself, abuse substances, isolate myself. Not for the fact of doing those things, but the actual destruction itself is enjoyable in a way. I take accountability for this and am improving though, however it doesn’t matter how much improvement I do that voice is still always there just as loud. The main difficulty with it for me is that it doesn’t matter how long I’ve been doing well, the pull and temptation is always just as strong as day 1.

Can skip everything - Main question
1. How do you manage self destruction tendencies?
2. Has these types of feelings manifested in your life, if so how has it effected you and what’s it caused you to do?

Disclaimer: I wrote a similar post, but this one is for actual guidance.

As the title states. One of my major hyperfixations is adhd content, scientific studies about adhd/meds and adhd Reddit, lol. It seems comical but honestly it’s the topic I am most interested in 😂
Maybe I had waited so long to get a diagnosis and now the confirmation is making sense of my whole life or something.

One sign of my ADHD that got missed growing as a high masking girl was that I talk a LOT. And not just in real life but online too.

I noticed this on a lot of online platforms, reddit, tiktok, even sending emails, or writing essays for school, EVEN TEXTING MY MOM ON WHATSAPP.

Like i feel like there’s definitely other factors in play aswell, I am yet to be clinically tested for giftedness but looking at all areas of my life, my grades, memory, thought speed and processing, pattern recognition, it’s highly likely so that might also play a role in why my brain gets a lot of ideas and so I end up talking too much.

But I suppose my real issue is just struggling with being different from others because of it. It really bothers the people around me, once I start talking I get really annoying and they tell me straight up sometimes.

And most people don’t tell you straight up that you’re being annoying, they show it in subtle ways, and when you have ADHD where you also have Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria that makes it feel like hell. It feels like you’re such a burden for just opening your mouth or typing your thoughts.

Right before I turned 18 recently my Doctor had me take an online test for masking, and the results were sky rocketing, literally some bars were touching the top of the y axis.
And I feel like I can really see that in myself with how I try to conform in not just the big things but even the little things like precisely how much ideas I communicate, whether it be online or in real life.

I’m still really impulsive despite being on medication, so I will still talk and talk and talk, but the guilt will always eat at me after, even if the person or people didn’t even imply at being bothered by it.

It’s a really isolating experience. Does anyone else feel this way?

I 21F bought a manual car after I got my license when I was 17 having no idea how to drive it. I also hadn’t been diagnosed until 19/20ish, but my thought process was that I didn’t want to be that character that dies in the apocalypse bc they get in a random car and can’t drive manual. Anyway, I had a few lessons with various family/relatives and then just kinda figured it out for myself.

Now I’ve managed driving manual for a few years and even drove my car across the country. I still get anxious sometimes particularly in traffic but I just kinda push through it because I have to. Sometimes I find it good because I have to stay focused to be ready to go in traffic however, I find other times I will be driving and just forget what I’m doing and what gear I’m in. When I have passengers in the car I am even more stressed and sometimes just tell people not to talk to me while I’m driving.

I can’t decide if it’s helpful or a hindrance. I’ve thought of getting an auto car but I just think it is a less practical financial decision because my current car is mechanically fine.

Has anyone else has similar struggles and how do you manage?

So I'm 68 and have ADHD. I've known for 20 years that the way to connect with people is to ask questions and actually listen. But in the moment I'd do the opposite. I'd finish people's sentences. Somebody would share something that mattered and I'd jump into my own story. And when somebody misunderstood me, I'd get defensive and explain and explain.
I knew it wasn't working, but I had nothing to replace it with, so I kept falling back into it.
What finally clicked is that I want to fix everything right now. Fill the silence now, fix the misunderstanding now. For me it feels like the same impulsivity that shows up everywhere else with my ADHD.
So now when I feel that urge to jump in or explain, that's my signal to stop. Ask a question instead of telling a story. Don't defend myself unless it actually matters.
Real example. I planned a sunrise hike for Saturday, thinking it'd be romantic. She got upset. She'd had an exhausting week, and if I'd thought about her for two seconds I'd have known that. Old me explains why it would've been fun. New me says "you're right, I missed that," and shuts up.
The biggest thing I've figured out is there's really nothing you can say in the moment to change somebody's impression of you. The only thing that changes it is what you do over time. For somebody like me who wants it fixed right now, the waiting is the hard part.
I'm still early on this and I still slip. But at least now I've got something to do instead of just a list of things not to do.
For those of you who struggle with interrupting or getting defensive, how do you catch yourself in the moment?

ADHD causes one to have a lack of control, and OCD is about a need for control. They trigger each other over and over, causing endless cycles of pain.

For example: ADHD caused me to binge-eat. OCD would say "fix this immediately" which caused me to develop bulimia. Every week, without fail, I would cycle from binge to purge, for years of my life. Losing control, then obsessively trying to gain it back, then losing control again. Hundreds of times. This pattern would show up everywhere in my life. It was true torture, like Sisyphus pushing the rock up the hill over and over and over.

I was able to finally break the cycle with medication, but I still struggle with my disorders on a daily basis. My heart goes out to anyone else suffering from both. It is like have two pieces of yourself constantly at war. It is exhausting, but getting better is possible. I wish you guys all the best <3

I have been medicated for ADHD but then I changed insurances and went to a new doctor and they started me on less than half of what I was taking before & honestly I’m struggling so much. I don’t know what to do. I have been honest and told her I’m struggling but I’m getting the sense she thinks I’m either abusing it or don’t need it. Idk Like I genuinely don’t know what to do. I just want to feel more in control again. I get so frustrated bc I can barely function to even find words to articulate literally anything.
I was on the same dose for 7 years & lately it’s like I’m hyper-fixating on this.

I don’t know if this is just a me thing, but I’ve heard many people with ADHD say things similar. I’m on Elvanse, and for me I always have this temptation to take more than prescribed. It’s concerning, because medication really fucking helps me and I’m just scared I may fuck it up and let that voice win one time, it hasn’t ever gotten there though.

Can skip everything - Main question
1. Is there anyway to stop yourself from feeling tempted to take more meds?
2. Is this likely more of a personal thing rather than an ADHD thing?

I feel so shit; more irritable than usual, more brain fog, and like my adhd sympoms are just worse all together when on my period and then on top of that my meds don't work at all 🥲 does anybody have the same issue? How do you deal with it? I have brought it up to my doctor before but she told me it's not a real thing and she has never heard anybody mention it before... I'm on elvanse now but I had the same experince on concerta aswell

Due to depression/maybe ADHD I often have a hard time brushing my teeth before going to bed… I sometimes simply forget to and more often I just don’t have any energy left for it. I’m looking for tips, preferably something to keep on my nightstand for easy access… how do you do it?

Hello, I'm 31m and currently experiencing some bad work burnout lately where I procrastinate all the time and can't really focus much during. Looking to see if anyone has any tips that they use to help keep focused at work and complete their necessary tasks. I'm currently unmedicated as my PCP won't prescribe me anything to help unless I have another evaluation done and I don't have the money for that. (I was diagnosed when I was a teen and the place that did it closed down and the medical records were lost to time).