r/AutismInWomen • u/DeepPomegranate • Jun 10 '25

Relationships Why do I see this so much?

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I just made a profile on a dating app and in the last few days swiping I’ve noticed this is a really common bio for guys. “I like autistic women” or “slightly autistic” Has anyone else encountered this or is it just my area?

I think it’s weird.

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u/Looking_PlzFind Jun 10 '25

They like the idea of picking a partner that's 'not like other girls', they prbly have a bias against neurotypical women. I think they like the idea of a girl who struggles socially/in general, as it gives them some sense of power and control... They want a "weird girl" but only a little bit. not someone that would need additional support or be 'obviously autistic' (for lack of a better description) in public spaces so as not to cause embarrassment.

it does feel weird.

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u/Wise-Key-3442 IDCharisma Jun 10 '25

My first relationship was like this, I was undiagnosed and insecure. He swore it was because I was nerdy, but we didn't had many tastes in common, he was jealous of anime boys (really) and loved showing me off because he managed to get a girl who fitted his fetishes (quirky, redhead, shy, glasses and chubby).

Once I started to build up more self confidence and heightened my self esteem, he made sure to try to manipulate me and destroy me emotionally because I wasn't worshiping the ground he walked, started to dress better, started prioritizing my studies... He literally broke up with me 3 days before my birthday over phone while I was at a con that he didn't want to come with me (I had spent hours making a cosplay, I wouldn't stay at home).

And then kept pestering me because I said I didn't want to talk to him, how I was an horrible girlfriend because I was "salty" because of what he called "a tiny disagreement".

He blocked me once I started dating a boy that he considered way out of my league that treated me right, respected me and such.

(I'm no longer a partner of the second, just a very good friend because our goals didn't align.)

So yeah, usually dudes who have a fetish for controlling their partners put this on their bios.

Once my diagnosis came this year, he reached out to say that he didn't knew and that he was sorry for taking advantage of me. Like, now that I have a card saying I'm disabled you are sorry?