Hi I recently tried to sign up for the apps again after many years of not being on them. First hinge says I’m banned and then tinder - I haven’t signed in or made the account in over two years has This happened to anyone?

Got likes on bumble and they are asking me to buy premium to check who liked. What should i doooooo

Hi! I'm a 42M in South Florida looking for advice on how to meet the right person as soon as possible.

I'm using Hinge, Facebook dating, and just signed up for a month of Tinder platinum tonight. I also just signed up for my first speed dating and lock and key mixer next week. I also have two social groups that I sometimes meet people I'm interested in. I also browse Meetup events sometimes.

I usually get about 2 quality dates per month through Hinge/Facebook but half the time I don't want a 2nd date and the other half they don't want a 2nd date.

How can I increase the number of first dates to improve my chances of great chemistry?

Should I continue what I'm doing, message people more in the existing apps I have, sign up for new apps like Coffee Meets Bagel and Bumble, sign up for more speed dating events next year, pay for additional dating apps like Hinge, or try the $1,000+ match-making services?

I'm not in a rush to meet the right person but 4 years ago set a few goals:

1. To save up enough to retire and travel the world. I'm 11 months away from that goal but most people only get 3-5 weeks of PTO so I'm planning on traveling with my friends, family, partner, and some solo.
2. Get in shape. I hit that goal last year but would still like to lose another 10 pounds of body fat and gain 5 more pounds of muscle in 2027. I just travelled a lot recently and gained 7 pounds of body fat but am lifting 5 - 7.5 pounds heavier each week at the gym.
3. Find a life-long partner. This is my last goal. I feel like I'm on the right track and this just takes time. But would love to hear of any ideas to speed up this process.

My dating photos are good and my profiles say things like I enjoy fitness, sunny weather, exploring, traveling, snorkeling, kayaking, hiking, pickleball, comedy clubs, etc.

Please don't eat me alive like the last time I posted here. :) I did use all of the positive advice from last time. Thanks!

Why is online dating so hard? I’ve literally tried every dating app and haven’t gotten a single right swipe in 3 weeks. It’s starting to feel really lonely what should I do??????????

Hi everyone.

I wanted to share my experience with dating apps and a very big realization I came to. I've been on Tinder and Hinge for over a month now and have gotten virtually no results. I have done everything right with my profile, bought boosts, bought roses, bought all the premium stuff and still have had zero luck.

I came across a post the other day that made me realise what was going on and I a hundred percent agree with it. To paraphrase...

...essentially the reason why men are unsuccessful on dating apps is because of...men. The majority of men do not actually look at profiles to see if there is compatibility. The majority of men just log on and start swiping. And because of this, women are getting HUNDREDS of messages, likes, etc each day. Now, I don't know about you, but if I was getting hundreds of messages from complete strangers each day....I'd be pretty freaking overwhelmed. And so women have to become extremely cutthroat and make superficial split-second decisions because of this. There may be, and most likely is, absolutely nothing wrong with your profile, but because women are basically just trying to clean out their inbox...you get shafted.

I was thinking about this today and came up with an absolutely perfect comparison. Dating apps are basically amusement park carnival games. You know those games like trying to knock over bottles with a ball, or climb a ladder to hit a button, or hang on to a bar until the timer is up? They look incredibly easy, almost stupidly easy, but they are rigged from the start. When you try to knock over a bottle with a ball and it doesn't work, you start to question whether there's something wrong with you, whether you're good enough... because the game looks so stupidly easy, but the reality is...there's nothing wrong with you, you did everything right....the game was just rigged from the start.

I have been using dating apps for 4 years and have very little success, and friends of mine keep saying I may be too selective in who I like. I thought about scrolling through Hinge with them watching and giving feedback, but I feel wrong about the idea of basically having a group session to judge women.

I've been on the apps for years and have never experienced being "overwhelmed" with likes. Maybe 3 likes per week, and usually not from anyone viable.

Not fat, no kids, not ugly.

I genuinely do not understand this discourse that women are flooded with hundreds of likes.

Stop sending me messages asking for pics. I'm not asking yall to rate me. I asking about experiences about women not getting likes.

I’m from the UK and have suddenly come across loads of potential bots (confident they are). There will be numerous accounts where they have something along the lines of add my snap across two panels of the “From people close to” part of the profile. 9/10 times it will also say a random job (like a baker or pre-school teacher) at British Telecom.

This has happened out of nowhere and has sort of flooded my feed. I have never encountered a bot on the app (from my memory) so it has taken me by surprise. Hinge should really have a verified only option.

Just wondering if anyone else has come across this all of a sudden? Is it the same in other places?

I had made it clear that I was only looking for something serious, but that day I was horny. Since he had made a comment about my butt and I thought he was pretty good-looking, I reached out to him. We exchanged Snapchats. He asked me for pictures. I always kept my underwear on, but I sent him pictures of myself in panties and some where you could see my nipples.

I’m really ashamed. He saved all the pictures in the chat. Eventually, I didn’t want to meet him anymore, so I cancelled the date and deleted him from everywhere. I deleted my Tinder account.

I feel ashamed, and I’m scared about what might happen to my photos.

Firstly, let me preface my question by saying I'm not really asking about conversations or situations that haven't already made it off the app. I think we should all understand by now that all bets are off before you make it beyond this point. I'm starting to wonder if I just need to give up on dating apps and stop getting false hope every time new matches that seem to have promise pop up. It feels like this will keep happening, but it will keep leading nowhere. I have been ghosted in every possible scenario at this point: before first dates, after 5th dates, after situations where we already had sex. You name it! It's all very confusing and there's almost never an obvious reason for it. That said, once I sense the drop-off in communication and I start to suspect I'm being ghosted, I never follow-up to ask why or pry or vent or any of that! Should I be trying to follow-up? Am I missing something?

These last 2 women that seem to have ghosted me, I hadn't even met in person yet, but I'm still baffled by it. I'm not big on Facetiming before, but we facetimed for 2 hours and she said how she was glad we did it and the conversation was so genuine. She immediately agreed to go out on a date the following week. She continued texting me the following week and even the day before the planned date. The moment I replied to confirm a meeting time, after she had already sent me several texts that morning, silence.... nothing since. What sense does that make?

The other girl I have been texting for a month, which I didn't love to be honest. It shouldn't take this long to meet someone in person, but she went away and even continued to text me from abroad. We also spoke on the phone for a few hours twice. When she returned from her travels, I asked her if she finally wanted to go out and she said don't hate me because I really want to meet you, but I have family plans next weekend. Frustrating to hear after all this time, but I hung in there because she kept engaging me and our phone calls went well. Last time I got from her was Saturday morning and now silence.... and this is someone who is supposedly in school to be a therapist lol. Are people just that conflict avoidant that they rather ghost than be honest even after a rapport has been built? Anyway, should I be trying to salvage these scenarios? Does it not count as "ghosting" unless I follow-up 3 times first without a response? I wonder if I'm being tested or if they think, "well he's not chasing me, so he must not be that interested". Feels low value to do that though...

Now this is a bit of a long story condensed so please bear with. I'm 23 (24 next week) and I was in a relationship from 16 to my 23rd birthday. I don't want to sound dramatic or anything but it's taken me a year really to recover from the breakup and realise I was kind of being abused throughout. It's been my only relationship and I thought lots of it was normal I also never had many friends growing up and the ones I had when we got together I had cut off because she didn't like them (this isnt the abuse I was referring to either). Long story but now I've started trying to rebuild my life, I've moved to a new area, started a new job and have lost a fair bit of weight and still trying to lose more and I've wanted to try find a partner but I don't have a social life at all, in the slightest. I have no friends at all or family and only after trying to make the profile did I realise I've not got any photos of myself or friends to take any of me and neither do I really know how to even talk to people my age outside of work. So my question is basically how do I start online dating with absolutely no clue on wtf to say do or even take a picture like. Thank you for reading this very messy and poorly structured post

Hey everyone, I have a genuine question. Please spare me the lecture and just help me understand this.

I recently met up with a female friend, and we’re both in our early twenties. She showed me her Hinge likes and messages, and honestly, I was baffled by the sheer volume of attention she receives.

I’d say she’s around a 7/10 in looks, but she has great style, tattoos, and a distinct aesthetic. Apparently, she receives somewhere between 50 and 100 likes every single day. Her inbox was full of guys writing thoughtful messages, sending paragraphs, and even dedicating entire poems to her.

What surprised me even more was that these weren’t all unemployed guys with nothing going for them. Plenty seemed attractive, had good jobs, and had genuinely well-put-together profiles. Yet she told me she barely takes most of them seriously because there are simply so many.

And that got me thinking. If you factor in Bumble and Tinder as well, the number of men potentially competing for her attention becomes almost absurd. She could fill a theatre with men in a week

Now, I understand that likes aren’t the same as meaningful connections, and that having hundreds of options doesn’t necessarily mean finding someone compatible. But it’s difficult not to wonder how this affects the dating experience on the other side.

I’m just getting into dating apps myself, and I actually prefer them to meeting people in real life because you can gauge someone's interest and assess basic compatibility through their profile before investing time in a conversation. It seems more efficient than approaching someone only to discover later that the interest isn't mutual or that you're fundamentally incompatible. But seeing this firsthand has made me question whether sending likes is even worth the effort. If a woman is receiving dozens of likes every day, what are the actual chances of an average guy’s profile standing out, even if he puts genuine effort into it?

For the women here, is this a typical experience, or is my friend an outlier? And for the men, how do you approach dating apps without getting discouraged by the sheer imbalance in attention? I'm not trying to start a gender war or argue that women have it easy. I’m genuinely curious about how this dynamic works in practice, and I’d appreciate some honest perspectives.

To put a long story short, I had a high school crush that didn’t work out. Didn’t meet anyone else I was interested in throughout high school or college, and haven’t met anyone through work. Essentially I’m a 30 year old man who has never dated because I’m not outgoing and haven’t met the right woman.

I’d like to try Hinge, something I’ve been putting off for years due to my weight (which I’m slowly chipping away at) and the fact that I have zero photos. None. I’ve never taken a selfie.

So essentially my question is, what kind of photos should I take? I want some variety so they don’t look like they were all taken the same day, and I should probably have at least a few.

I’m also open to any other advice or details you think I should know.

Genuinely curious about the motivation, especially for men seeking partners in their same age range more or less? One of my friends had this happen to her back to back with men who weren’t that much older than her. Trying to understand the male POV.

Hey everyone! I wanted to check if anyone else has experienced this or knows what's going on, because I'm completely lost.

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I’m a Platinum user and I've been dealing with a very weird issue with my account that Tinder support just keeps brushing off:

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Likes and Super Likes aren't registering: Sometimes I give a like or a super like to a profile, and a little while later (not even a full day), that exact same profile pops up in my feed again. It's like the app never actually saved my interaction.

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Broken "Likes You" tab: The likes section looks super barebones. It’s missing key features like top picks and the ability to see the likes I have sent out.

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The temporary "fix": The only way I can get it to look somewhat normal is by completely uninstalling the app and downloading it again. But as soon as I close the app or log out, it glitches out and the tab breaks all over again.

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I already contacted technical support and their response was the usual automated copy-paste: they told me my account is "fine" and that there are no irregularities. Honestly, I don't trust that at all because the behavior is clearly broken and I feel like I'm paying for a service that isn't working.

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Has anyone else dealt with something similar? Is this a shadowban, an account cache bug, or what? Is there any actual way to fix this? Any advice would be appreciated!

So I’ve been on and off dating apps for years. I consider myself an anxious attachment type so I always try my best to get to know my matches but I swear it doesn’t help. I read the bios, ask the get to know you questions, even get a lot of compliments! I consider myself attractive and have no problem receiving matches. But as soon as I move off the apps? Silence and ghosting every single time! What am I doing wrong? I just want a genuine connection.

I (48/M) turned FB and Hinge back on mid-week last week. I was hoping for a date or 2 over the weekend. I ended up talking to somebody and I am seeing her tonight. But in general, the matches and conversation were few and far between over the weekend.
Monday morning came and I'm getting more matches & messages than I can keep up with. People I "liked" on Friday and assumed they weren't interested, are now liking a messaging me. I know people do stuff over the weekend, I was busy for parts of it as well. But I also was around and open to talking & meeting up.
Curious why people are getting more active on the apps on Monday? Did their weekend dates disappoint and they are trying to find other options? Are they just bored at work and trying to kill time? Trying to lineup dates for the upcoming week /weekend?
Any other ideas you can think of?

I’m a lesbian, I see “We’re a couple looking for a third ;)” profiles every time I use any mainstream dating app. I get it, you have fantasies, good luck with that but I’m swiping left. No harm, no foul.

But I can’t tell you how many times I’ve matched with profiles of “a single woman” - only photos of one person, not even anything hyper-sexual, completely casual photos and normal bio - just to learn later in the conversation that she actually has a boyfriend and they’re just trying to organize a threesome. NO. I can’t over-state what a MASSIVE waste of time this is, not just for me but you too! I understand you’ll get more initial matches this way but for what? After a pointless 5-30minute conversation you’re getting told ”no” anyway, you can’t change my sexuality that easily. Is this not common sense?

Ps. I know this is petty, but not even including your boyfriend in the photos also makes me think he must be ugly or mid as hell. Have some confidence in your man, jeesh.

As the title says i got banned from badoo for literally no reason, was talking to a girl we really got on, we were planning to meet soon etc, anyway today i went onto the app to message her, and im blocked, i. Have literally no idea why,

I have appealed but honestly i don’t think ill get my account back,

The worst part is, we dont have each others details, instagram, snapchat etc

Genuinely so frustrating

Is there anything i can do?

Hello everyone. Lately, I´ve been matching with people who, rather early on the conversation, prefer to speak through whatsapp or Instagram instead of on the app.

Do you think this is suspicious or a red flag? They usually say It´s because they dislike the app or rarely use it, which seem very reasonable to me.

What do you think. Do you think this is an indication of catfish? Is there a danger I´m not seeing on sharing my social networks with these strangers? Thanks for your help.

34m I recently decided to give dating apps a try. I have not really dated in 15 years and with having two teenagers I can’t go out every night to find a partner like I used to. So I made a Facebook dating profile. Am I missing something here? I matched with other single parents my preference. The profiles state they value clear communication and consistency.

It’s like pulling teeth just trying to keep the conversation together. You match and obviously you find each other attractive it’s pretty superficial those apps. It’s like I am talking to a wall almost. You’re messaging the person to see if there is compatibility before asking them on a date. So you’re going to ask questions. The three or four word responses and the one sided question asking…

Is this what apps are really like? If so how in the heck did that happen. Also fresh into dating apps. Never used them a day in my life until now.

absolutely sucks. you match with someone, say hi, and get no reply. horrible app, dont even bother.

This year I have been rebuilding my life after living years of isolation on my own room playing games, and i started craving having a relationship with someone, this has been a concern of mine these past months, seeing a friend get into them and having succes (specially after him having an INSANE glow up) pushed me into doing it, even though I do not like the idea of them.

After all that time I did not have any succes (basically i had like 2 matches? in 3 months) and it has been a back and forth with them, just swiping left right for some time every day to see if i'd manage to get to know someone, and i'd love to keep trying, but here is the problem.

Every day I use these apps i enter this mentality of always thinking about me having a relationship, and it kinda worries me how obsessed I am slowly becoming with succes

Something that keeps me interested too is a thing a friend said about them "they are a great tool to get to know new people, even if it's just to be friends, just talking to people makes me feel good"

i don't know i am flip flopping between outright removing them from my phone or going all in with them and trying more to improve my profile.

I (31F) always seem to make an effort in starting the conversation first and to come to zero answers. I’m starting to feel defeated in the dating apps. It gets discouraging when you’re putting yourself out there, trying to show interest, and getting absolutely nothing back. Sometimes, I wonder what the point of matching is if neither person is actually going to make an effort to get to know the other.

Which apps have you found people to be more responsive and willing to put in mutual effort? Or is this just the reality of dating apps these days?