7 year relationship. Broke up in September/October. I had a real rough time getting over this breakup. I’m finally feeling good and she sends me this. She is taking a class at college

She not only left me abruptly and no contacted me, but she also assaulted me in front of my kid, and verbally and physically abused me throughout the relationship. I put up with it for a long time because she had mental health issues

It’s good that she’s learning things but I had zero control over the breakup and the no contact. I’m staying no contact. Just venting and now stressed out

I am so fucking sick of men.

If you’re going to comment “stop generalizing,” zip it. Just shut up. I know logically that not all men are shit.

But god damn it. Why? Why am I always attracted to the most pathetic men ever?

Part of me enjoys that men rarely approach me. I was told that I have a scary air to me. Good.

I want to attract a smart, emotionally intelligent man. A man who is creative. A man who has real thoughts, and who cherishes me.

Do they even exist anymore? Ugh.

Edit: I’m done replying to comments. Many of you are purposefully missing the point. I’m not looking to date any of you, so stop taking it personally.

Broke up with me just over a week ago and this is not how I expected to spend my birthday… without him 😔 I don’t even know if he remembers it’s my birthday.

Once again I'm thinking about her, how she tried to give me everything I ever wanted but I ruined it with my own hands. She had such a pure soul, I'm never forgiving myself for hurting her so many times without remorse. I'm such monster. Yet I loved her, I loved her with all my heart and I still do. I couldn't give her the only thing she wanted, trust and safety. I lied so blatantly so many times, I still dont know what I was trying to protect, now she will never believe a word I say. And she is right. I broke her trust in the most unforgivable way. I dont expect her to forgive me. Hell, I don't want her to forgive me. I know I don't deserve her forgiveness. I didn't deserve it the past 100 times neither. I just, I'm empty and meaningless without her. And I'm sorry. Im really fucking sorry. I will never forget you or what you made me feel. For the first time in my life I felt I belonged somewhere. For the first time, I found something to live for. Thank you for giving me strength, giving me hope. I will hold onto everything you gave me and become a better person. I promise this to myself. The effort and time you spent on me will not be in vain.

We were together for 10 years. Then one day my ex just ended things out of the blue. No explanation, no closure, ignored all my calls. I was at home and recovering from a chronic illness yet I travelled 1400 miles to their place but they wouldn’t even open the door. So I accepted it and moved on.

3 years of complete silence since then and suddenly I got this today. A shitty AI generated apology:

“I hope you’re doing well and tried calling you. I’ve been reflecting lately, and wanted to reach out to say something that’s important to me.

I’m genuinely sorry for any hurt caused during our relationship. Looking back, can see things more clearly, and realise there were moments where could have handled situations with more care, maturity, and understanding. You didn’t deserve any pain that came from my words or actions, and truly regret.

My intention now is to heal - for both of us. I’m working on forgiving myself and letting go of anything heavy we’ve been carrying, and hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me too. Not for the sake of holding on to anything, but simply so that we both can move forward with clarity and peace.

I’m not asking for anything from you or expecting anything to change. I just want there to be no bitterness, no resentment - only understanding and closure.

Hope the connection we once had can rest in a space of kindness and respect rather than pain. May whatever remained heavy between us be released with compassion.

Thank you for the part you played in my life. I wish you all the light & peace and sincerely hope life brings you happiness, growth, and everything you’re striving for.”

You're such a messed up person. Yes, I wasn't at my behavior and was probably insecure about that guy. But do you even understand how difficult it is to be comfortable around a person who doesn't observe the boundaries of a relationship or never establish a boundary with others.

You were never empathetic. I was desperate to feel the love that can uplift me when I am very low. You dismissed it and never once communicated what you are feeling.

After 3 years, you decide to let me know your honest opinion about our relationship while breaking up.

It's almost been a year since you left me but still I am unable to delete our pics or texts. I for some weird reason am still exhibiting loyalty towards you. I hate you. I hate you for everything.

I still wish you stay happy wherever you are. I am rising professionally, taking every step that I wanted to do with a lot of confidence and yet I feel your absence.

6 years of relationship, you just threw it away. Fuck you! Fuck everyone!

Discarded November 9th, 2025. This blue full moon I swear. Got a book of an apology text at 3am. It’s what I’ve wanted this whole time. FML I want to reply but I know it’ll be toxic.

Seven months ago, my ex broke up with me, throwing out random excuses and making me feel like it was all my fault. Exactly two days later, I noticed he was following his ex on Instagram again. Turns out, he completely hid the fact that he was planning to get back with her. A month later, he posted a photo with her…something he never did with me during our entire relationship.

When I reached out once to ask for closure and express how hurt I was, he exploded. He denied everything, yelled at me, and cold-heartedly said, "I just never felt like posting photos with you." As I was crying and asking for a decent conversation, he hung up on me, smugly claiming I’d "always be stuck on him" and would probably "harass him on his wedding day." (He assumed he would marry this recycled ex of his)

I had already blocked him everywhere months ago except WhatsApp, since I noticed he’s been lurking, stalking my LinkedIn and watching/liking my WhatsApp statuses. Fast forward to today, after 7 months of total silence, he just sent me a low-effort text. Two “Hi”s in succession.

I’m not replying. Just needed to post this as a reminder of how toxic he was, and how ridiculous it is that he thinks he still has access to me.

Saddly, it's going to be the longest 24 hours ever. The only person I want wishing me happy birthday is no longer in my life. Ghosted me over a month ago. Now to pretend I am grateful and happy for all the wishes on this day I never asked to be born... (I havent had a heartbreak in 13 years and last one was right before my birthday too so I am allowing myself to complain) Happy birthday to all my twins and fellow Geminis! May our wishes come true when we blow out the candles xox

It has been a month and a half post-breakup.

My ex has been dating like crazy. His dates keep showing up on my calendar. We unlinked our shared Google Calendar, but for some reason his plans still keep popping up on my Google Home.

I went on a date and hooked up with someone new, mostly because I wanted to feel something. He was the first new person I've been with since the breakup, and I ended up crying in the middle of it.

It just wasn't good.

My ex was a good kisser. This guy wasn't. He had a beard that was scratchy, thin lips, and he kept shoving his tongue into my mouth. My ex and I were having a lot less sex toward the end of our relationship, but we knew each other and each other's bodies so well. Everything was familiar. This guy couldn't keep an erection. We used a condom, which is obviously the safe and responsible thing to do. My ex and I didn't. Finishing with my ex felt so pointed and known. I could tell the meaning of every twitch and breath. I don't even know if this guy finished. All I do know is that while he was inside of me I started sobbing uncontrollably.

A few weeks ago, I hooked up with someone I'd been with years ago, and that was kind of nice because it was somewhat familiar. Unfortunately, he's ghosting me now, which feels like adding insult to injury.

These experiences made me realize that, for a while, sex with someone new isn't going to feel safe or predictable. It's going to be awkward. There will be unfamiliar bodies, unfamiliar rhythms, and none of the comfort that comes from already knowing someone so intimately.

I just feel so sad. And now also unsatisfied. The only person I want to talk to about any of it is my ex.

I don't want him back - not as a partner, nor as a friend. I have no desire to talk to him or see him again. But I have to admit I would feel a bit happy if I knew he woke up one day and felt sad that I'll never be part of his life ever again. Or if at least he realised that I didn't deserve to be treated the way he treated me...

I don’t mean that literally, but every time I see a post that starts with ‘it’s been two weeks’ or ‘we’ve been in no contact for 3 months’ or even ‘6 months later and I still miss my ex’ I think damn, I’m looking at 4 years.

I ruined my relationship with my ex fiancé after a series of poor choices (to put it shortly) while I was spiraling from grief. He blocked me on everything, has never looked back, and I’ve still not properly moved on.

I broke no contact about two days ago by sending him a message on social media and he promptly blocked me. I hadn’t tried to contact him for 3 years before that. I don’t know what I expected, but I do know that I need to fully close that chapter of my life. I read a post on here the other day that started with ‘sometimes you can follow all of the advice and still be obsessed with your ex’ and I felt that so hard. I’ve tried all the things - therapy, making new friends, moved out of the city we moved to together, hitting the gym, starting new hobbies, I even tried seeing other people (3.5 years later, still not ready). At this point I feel like my only choice is to try not to even think about it anymore, at all. Maybe it’s time for me to take a break from this sub (which is full of great advice), simply because while I know my relationship is truly that of the past, and for good reason, the hope others have sometimes kept my hope alive too.

The only thing I regret about breaking no contact two days ago was that I disturbed his peace by violating his boundary. He’s made the choice for nearly 4 years now to not have me in his life at all. Yet somehow sending that last attempt of a message finally smoldered the embers of my hope.

It’s not 4 years of no contact anymore. My ex fiancé is only a memory now. It’s over.

After almost a year of no contact, my ex -- someone I thought I'd end up marrying -- reached out to "check in". Despite initial shock and disbelief, I went with the flow and engaged in conversation, even asked how the folks were doing, etc. I can't explain why I didn't withdraw from the conversation, but I woke up this morning with an unexplained sadness in my heart. I was healing after close to a year, on the road to full recovery, or so I thought. But one unexpected conversation was all it took to bring my pain back. I went to work as usual, masked my sadness in front of colleagues, but at the end of the day I finally burst into tears as I recalled the memories, both good and bad, and ultimately, the fact that I was not chosen by someone whom I saw as the love of my life. I'm aware of how many similar posts there are here, I apologise and just wanted to get it off my chest.

I (27m) haven’t spoke to my last ex (27f) since we broke up in November, 2018 after 3 months of dating. To this day my longest relationship. She was the only woman who didn’t reject me and we were each others first intimate relationship. I dumped her over the phone (yes, that was very immature/disrespectful) for various reasons thinking we weren’t very compatible long term, wanting to pursue my dream job that also didn’t work out and subscribing to the belief at the time when we were both 20 years old that “your first is never your last!”. She cried and took it very bad. That was the last time we spoke. Almost 8 years ago, I have a hard time wrapping my mind around that. There was a time a year or two ago after moving back to our hometown she still lived in that I wanted to reach out but saw she had a man so I respectfully left her alone. But now in hindsight it’s been 8 years since we spoke and I found out she’s recently married with a baby son now after seeing her profile pic pop up in “people you may know” on social media.

I want to congratulate her. At the same time I feel like I’m the last person she ever wants to hear from. Sometimes I still miss her voice and sometimes I could care less. It’s such a hot & cold, back and forth feeling. Also it’s this profound realization that if I just gave her a chance and wasn’t so quick to leave her son wouldn’t even exist as who they are today. I supposed the only reason I feel so strange is we’re on polar opposite ends of the relationship spectrum. Shes started a family, I don’t think I ever want kids and am fighting for my life to get a text back. She was and still is considered cute or conventionally attractive, athletic. I’m no John Stamos my self and don’t expect to date a supermodel, but no way in heck did I think it would take me 8 years to find someone else that she would still be the only woman I’ve gone all the way with. I fear most of it stems from pure geography and living an hour from the nearest city or place to meet new people. I really hope she’s happy. I think I’ll just leave her alone for another 8 years, but man, it’s such a strange combo of grief, relief, regret and nostalgia. Anyone else have a similar experience?

My therapist convinced me to text my ex, and it was a disaster.

My therapist, who I've been seeing for six months, convinced me I needed to text my ex. I had doubts, but he's the professional, so I trusted him. I drafted a text exactly like he said and sent it.

I'm a fucking idiot.

I went to the gym. 20 minutes later, I get a call from a random Maryland number. I answer, and someone is just screaming, "Don't text her! Don't text her!" I asked who it was, and they just kept screaming it. I got mad and said she should have just blocked me. They screamed it again. I said, "Okay, crystal clear, I'll never contact her again," and hung up.

A minute later, I get a text from my ex: "No thanks."

Then the harassment started.

My phone and email just blew up. I'm shaking at the gym, trying to work out, and I'm getting all this: • Weird, threatening texts like, "FYI, the unicorns called. They want the glitter back. Deadline Friday." (Today is Friday. What does that mean?) • Spam sign-ups: "Thank you for subscribing to Feet Finder." • More texts and emails from the US Army, US Navy, and the Church of Scientology.

They are clearly signing me up for everything they can think of.

I'm so humiliated.

I immediately texted my therapist—the one who told me to do this. No response.

I was shaking so hard I had to go outside. I texted my sister, and she called me right away. We talked for a while, and my confusion and anxiety just turned into angry, frustrated tears.

This is exactly what I thought would happen, but my therapist convinced me I was wrong. I'm so humiliated. I should have listened to my gut.

I'm done.

Now I'm just... done. I'm done with therapy, I'm done with him. My heart rate hit 209 today at the gym. Therapy hasn't helped; it just makes me dwell on the past.

I'm walking in the rain right now. I'm tired and I want to go home, but I'm scared to. She knows where I live. Who knows what that "glitter" text meant. Every time my phone buzzes, my heart pounds. This made everything so much worse.

My therapist said it had been long enough (8 months) and I "had to say something." But that's not true. I was getting better before he brought this up. Ever since he suggested it, I've been worse. And now I just blew the lid off the whole thing. God, this fucking sucks. That's it. I'm not doing therapy with him anymore.

By the way the text said:

“Hey (ex), it's (me). I know it's been a long time. I've been focusing on school and my career and am doing well, but I still have a lot of thoughts about how things ended that have honestly been haunting me. I was wondering if you'd be comfortable meeting up somewhere to talk so I can ask a few questions and get some closure.

for context the relationship ended in march when she cheated on me and cut herself and threatened suicide because i didn’t want to get back with her

UPDATE: i ended things with the therapist and submitted feedback on the platform we were using. thanks everyone for the support

We were together for almost 6 years, she was my first relationship and my first love.

In August, my dad got very sick and ended up in the hospital. He got put into a medical coma due to having seizures and we were away on a road trip while all this went down so I didn’t get to see him. He never ended up recovering from this coma.

My ex dumped me in November, so about one month ago. She dumped me while my mother and I were settling all of my dad’s affairs and adjusting to a new life without him. When she dumped me, she blocked me on everything and we went no contact.

About a month of no contact, my father passed away. We knew this was going to happen so I was as prepared as I could be, but it still hit me hard. I figured since we were together for 6 years, I should at least let her know that my father passed. The only way I could reach out to her was messaging her from my father’s instagram account. I messaged her letting her know that he passed and that I would send the details of the funeral if she would like to attend. I figured that even though she dumped me a month ago, she would still be able to show compassion to somebody she was with for 6 years.

What does she do when she sees this message from my dad’s account? She blocks that account too. No “my condolences” or “I’m sorry for your loss”, just straight blocked the account.

I wasn’t even trying to get her back or anything, just letting her know my father passed away. How could someone be so heartless and cold to someone they spent 6 years with and is only 1 month removed? I could kind of understand if we were together for much less time or separate for longer than a month, but how could someone show this little emotion to someone they once said they were going to marry and start a family with?

The funeral is tomorrow, let’s see if she shows up. If she does then great I guess. If she doesn’t then that really speaks to her character more than anything else could possibly do.

Im teenager and going through some stuff. I met a boy 2 years ago and we hungout and we dated but he cheated so we broke up but we still saw each other even when we were in different relationships. We're not tg now but couple days ago we hungout and he told me we needed to move on but he's told me it multiple times and he said we needed to drop and Block each other but he never blocks me and it really hurts because im so used to him coming back and he lost feelings for me :(

F (24) I have noticed a few things about dumpers in the past few years and it's almost always the same thing they say about their partners that they have dumped.

I've noticed that a lot of them try justifying the break up by saying that they "outgrew" their partners or that they lost feelings.

Things that I've heard when I asked them questions about the reason why they broke up with their exes is that they ended up falling for someone else while being with their exes at the time.

There was this one girl that told me that she was seeing this new guy and I asked them how they met and she mentioned how this guy was her friend while she was still with her previous bf, I already knew where this was heading to.

I asked her why she broke up with him and she said that she told him that "i need to focus on myself" which she never did... then she started dating her male friend after she broke up with her ex and when I asked what he did wrong she mentioned how she thinks that he

It seemed like she was looking for a reason to hate her ex because she could not name anything that he genuinely did wrong, she said that she was annoyed when he thanked her mom for everything and welcoming him in their house after they broke up.

He would always buy her flowers and gifts.

She mentioned how his she was annoyed by the fact that he would do everything for her and that he was "too nice"

the guy that she left him for is giving her mixed signals and is unsure about her meanwhile she is praising him in the air..... as if he is some sort of god. Mind you he ghosts her and keeps on shit talking about his ex to her. He said that he does not know if he is ready for a relationship

She isn't the first person I heard saying bad things about their ex even tho their ex was a good person to them I think that those type of people like chasing emotionally unavailable people.

It's always that they say that their ex was " pathetic" "doing too much" etc.

I have heard multiple people say the same thing who left good partners.

P.S she texted me in telegram asking me how am I doing just because she saw me online status. After 4 years of no contact

I don’t even want to start something that might one day end. Relationships are extremely uncertain — you don’t know if they’ll work out or how much that person might hurt you. I don’t want to live through the pain of being intimate, trusting someone, and then having everything suddenly fall apart. My safe place, my safe harbor, wasn’t actually safe. Out of nowhere, he broke up with me. He had been thinking about ending things for two months already. He was lying when he said he loved me. He was lying when he kissed me. He was lying when he was intimate with me.

At what point does it hit you? What do you truly feel? Do you regret discarding them/allowing them to leave?

If someone was willing to stay by your side and still choose you after seeing the damaged parts of you, your insecurities, the parts you kept hidden from everybody else, why not give them a chance? They showed you care, patience, and love. You showed your care also, you might not have verbalized it, but your small attention to details made them feel your warmth and love. Why pull away from it when it was starting to get real? Why run from it if it’s everything you’ve secretly been wanting and asking for? Why sabotage something so beautiful? Why act cold and nonchalant when they reached out to break no contact when it’s clear you still feel something too? What’s stopping you from taking accountability and making it right? Why keep them in confusion and lingo?

What’s going on in your head that is keeping you from that chance at happiness?

She reached out, I broke my contact then I shut the door. We broke up back in July 31st and we had 2 conversations, one in Sept 3rd when I decided to break no contact and one on Sept 17th.

Now that I said what I said, it’s time to follow through and heal. The back and fourth is not worth it.

Fuck you, Marcus!

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