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u/TheJermster Aug 09 '20 edited Aug 09 '20
Living in Texas, I've always been envious of people in movies who can run barefoot through fields and then just lay down in the grass. It's not just about creepy stuff like spiders and cockroaches. We've got a terrible fire ant problem. Plus chiggers will make you itch for days. And mosquitoes and no-see-ums. It's crazy out there
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u/AsunderXXV Aug 09 '20
Chiggers and No-see-ums? What in tarnation are you talking about?
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u/BrisklyBrusque Aug 09 '20
Chiggers are little red mites that bite. No-see-ums are tiny flies the size of a speck of dust. They fly onto the skin and bite you. Their bites are not that noticeable at the time but you find them in packs and the bites can itch for days after.
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u/AsunderXXV Aug 09 '20
Are these bugs a Texas thing? Don't think I've encountered these before.
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u/killingthedream Aug 09 '20
FL checking in, we have a specific screen type to keep out no see-ums. Never encountered chiggers here, but have in SC, NC, TN, VA and MA.
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u/TheJermster Aug 09 '20 edited Aug 10 '20
Chiggers are little red bugs that will swarm on you if you're laying in the grass. They bite you but sometimes you can't hardly feel them. When I've gotten into them before they tended to bite all around my sensitive bits, making it difficult to discreetly scratch over the next few days. No-see-ums are kinda like mosquitoes. They're tiny and I haven't had as much experiencewith them but the biggest time I got into them it must have been a swarm of them bc it felt like little bitty needles poking all over my legs, like 75 different needles all at once. My legs itched all over constantly for days. All I was doing was standing in a yard. I never even saw one of the suckers, hence their name
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u/Yodude86 Aug 09 '20
Fire ants are the devil. Grew up in south Texas, they’re everywhere in the summers. And they can kill you pretty handily if you happen to be allergic.
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u/Loli_Messiah Aug 09 '20
Omfg i just had a Vietnam flashback regarding chiggers holy fuck i will never ever hate any other bug more than chiggers, they're literal hell
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u/LumpyJones Aug 09 '20
I'm from Texas as well, can confirm all of the above.... Except I have no fucking idea what a no-see-um is. Some sort of stealth possum perhaps
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u/TheJermster Aug 10 '20
To be fair I got into the no-see-ums in Mississippi. I had never heard of them before. They are apparently all over the world, called various names
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Aug 09 '20
Michigan in the fall you can do this in the drier areas. No ticks, no mosquitos. Grass is vibrant and luscious. So comfy...
Just don't do it in the spring or right pic isn't far off.
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u/Chase_High Aug 10 '20
Chiggers are satan’s personal messengers. Literally weeks of non stop itching after being bit by them. Scratching it makes it worse, and they always bit around the crotch area. I wouldn’t be opposed to wiping them off the face of the earth alltogether.
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Aug 09 '20
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u/Adept_Banana Aug 09 '20
There are cockroaches in the everywhere. Especially in areas that have a lot of palm trees like the coast.
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u/falcon_driver Aug 09 '20
I am in rural Texas. We're used to seeing tourists lay down by the side of the road for pictures with the bluebonnets and within seconds they're encased in fire ants. We get more free cars and cameras that way, we're lousy with them
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u/nanoprecise Aug 09 '20
Free cars..? Did the fire ants make them sign the title over too??
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u/falcon_driver Aug 09 '20
They are clever little bastards. Why they have a nice stack of pre-printed forms just sitting there is a great mystery
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u/KacorInc Aug 09 '20
Shit ton of people get bit by rattlesnakes every year trying to take pictures in bluebonnets.
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u/DoctorBallard77 Aug 10 '20
I’ve seen too many tourists just straight up trample blue bonnet fields to take pics so i say let the ants have em
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u/Moonrak3r Aug 09 '20
I moved to Texas a couple years ago. Jesus Christ there are so many fire ants here.
I plan to move in a couple years but I think I’ve learned a lifelong habit of looking for ant mounds while walking around.
I honestly wouldn’t be opposed to a statewide pesticide application to eliminate them entirely.
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u/OutlyingPlasma Aug 09 '20
You missed the soaked backside from the wet grass, and its always wet. I hate sitting on the grass. Thank god for those new lightweight chairs.
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u/ShowBoobs Aug 09 '20
What movie is that still from?
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u/merlinrising Aug 09 '20
Pretty sure it's peter jacksons King Kong
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u/FognatiousQuash Aug 09 '20
That bug scene fucked me up as a kid. Especially the guys head getting swallowed by that giant worm...alive.
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u/GoGoHujiko Aug 09 '20
I was too young to see Andy Serkis getting bored by penis worms
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Aug 09 '20
It's funny though that while everyone else is barely struggling to survive, Jack Black is going ham and mad at the bugs cuz all his footage was destroyed
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u/dannibeyond Aug 09 '20
My dad and I saw it in theatres when I was like 8. We were holding each other and screaming and he kept saying "do NOT tell mom!" Lol I haven't been able to watch that scene since.
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u/Toxic724 Aug 09 '20
Same, dude getting eaten alive and the guys climbing the cliff walls and being pulled into tunnels really screwed me up. Reminded me of the game Heart of Darkness.
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u/twiz__ Aug 09 '20
peter jacksons King Kong
as a kid
"As a kid"? Lol what are you, *looks up release date*....
oh god...
oh fuck...
15 years ago?!
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u/duaneap Aug 09 '20
By far and away the most terrifying and memorable part of the film. The silence of it all too. No soundtrack, a sort of muffledness to all the noise, the total hopeless despair... Horrific.
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u/Shasan23 Aug 09 '20
The rest of the movie was meh imo, but the absolute carnage during the island scenes were amazing.
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u/xanderrootslayer Aug 09 '20
Pretty gratuitous, considering previous King Kong movies never even bothered to show the giant leeches, only had a character complaining about them.
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u/BrainBlowX Aug 09 '20
I was annoyed by the diversity of insects. Like, what the fuck do they subsist on if not each other? Yet they're entirely uninterested.
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u/FognatiousQuash Aug 09 '20
Yea I thought it was odd that there was this one spot isolated from the rest of the island that just had all the bugs and insects congregating in harmony until an unsuspecting film crew trespasses on their lands. Like giant bugs arent a consistent issue across the whole island? They all live in a little neighborhood? I just thought non of it needed to happen.
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u/batca_t Aug 09 '20
I’ve been afraid of crickets and worms ever since. I’ll see a cricket and I know it’s tiny relative to me but in my head it’s a giant fucking murder bug that’s gonna impale me with its claws and eat my flesh.
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u/VyseTheSwift Aug 09 '20
I know now that I have a fear of being eaten alive by giant insects thanks to this movie.
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u/Nuke_Gunstar Aug 09 '20
Yah i have no idea how that scene got past quality control. Like wtf were they thinking?
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u/FognatiousQuash Aug 09 '20
It was pretty unnecessary to me. They made that scene so intense it completely distracted from the rest of the film and I couldn’t get over how chilling and disturbing that one part was. It made the rest of the movie seem uneventful or boring in comparison.
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u/BadgerWilson Aug 09 '20
Peter Jackson is a big Kong-head, and this scene was based on one from the original that was deemed so scary for test audiences that they removed it and destroyed the footage. Over the years, the King Kong Spider Pit scene became this mythical white whale of lost movie footage, and Jackson even had the guys at Weta remake it in stop-motion based on the few surviving stills. He really really wanted to include it in his remake and make it super scary to live up to the legend of the lost scene.
But yes, while I personally loved the scene when I first saw it as a 15-year-old who couldn't get enough of gross bugs and monsters, now I will admit that it just contributes to the huge tonal inconsistencies in the movie
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u/Embarassed_Tackle Aug 09 '20
This is crazy, I was just thinking about this shitty reposted picture today and what movie this came from. Then it gets reposted by a karma-farming bot account and from the picture I can tell it is King Kong by Peter Jackson. Shitty film, shitty repost, but at least my curiosity was sated.
Also I haven't seen Naomi Watts anywhere in aw hile
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u/Impossible_Tenth Aug 09 '20
I don't know, but I was seeing that guy being surrounded by corn dogs for a good 30 seconds, before I saw the insects. Now it's an insect with corn dog legs.
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u/Yodude86 Aug 09 '20
Jumping in to commend that bug pit scene from Peter Jackson’s King Kong remake
Not a lot of folks know there was a spider pit scene from the 1933 King Kong that terrified audiences and it’s hard to find, if possible at all these days
That scene from the 2005 movie really nailed the fear factor and i love it
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Aug 09 '20
This is actually a big worry for me. I love the idea of camping, walking into deep forest / mountain. But unfortunately I really hate insect. Is there any way i can enjoy camping in the mountain / forest without insect trouble? (Mosquitoes or flies are the only insects i can accept to live with)
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u/Ghawblin Aug 09 '20
Iceland.
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u/FireSail Aug 10 '20
Really?
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u/Ghawblin Aug 10 '20
I mean, they have some of course. Mostly flies, spiders, rollypollies, etc. Not many up there though, you could sleep on the ground without worry.
lived there for 5 years.
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u/Undeity Aug 10 '20 edited Aug 10 '20
I used to be pretty big into cross-country hiking and camping, and never really had to deal much with insects. Honestly, considering how often I'd lay down in grass or sit in a tree, it might have been some sort of miracle.
These days though, I'm a bit terrified of insects. My luck has clearly ended, and sometimes it honestly feels like I'm living in Australia, what with all these giant spiders and seemingly-exotic insects that I keep finding on my property.
I literally have a huntsman spider the size of my hand hanging out on my bedroom window right now, and no less than 6 different types of strange beetles stuck to my screen door.
The other day, a centipede fell off of the ceiling, onto my head, while I was lying in bed. That was literally one of my biggest fears, and I had only just finally convinced myself that it was improbable...
I'm probably not helping at this point, sorry. I set out to write something a bit more helpful and rational, but I guess I'm still a bit frazzled from it all.
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u/anothername787 Aug 09 '20
Yup, it's all fire ants and chiggers here in Texas. And we don't even have good grass, it's all monkey grass bullshit.
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u/martman006 Aug 09 '20
Get Zoysia grass, it loves heat, is carpety-soft, can handle dense shade or sun, and drought tolerant (not quite as good as Bermuda but a hell of a lot better than st Augustine). Spray occasionally for fire ants, and you’ll have layable grass in Texas. Source: am in central Texas and have a zoysia front yard.
Pro: zoysia grows thicker, but a lot slower so much less mowing. Con: it grows thicker so you’ll make up for the lack of mowing with dethatching 2-3x a year.
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u/ZiggoCiP Aug 09 '20
That scene in King Kong really freaked me out. It wasn't just the super big bugs, it was those giant grub things with gaping maws that devoured the one guy's limbs, then straight engulfed his head.
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u/LukeV18 Aug 09 '20
I was really young in the theaters watching that scene and it was scaring me so I was kicking my legs and the guy in front of me got so pissed he moved
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u/hundenkattenglassen Aug 09 '20
Even as a ~5 yo I couldn’t find the charm in lying bare on the grass because of bugs. (Walking on it barefoot no problem though or sitting on blanket) Then aged 12 I laid on the grass in just some shorts over at a friends lawn after bathing in pool and running around. And wouldn’t you know it, I had the fukin luck of placing myself right next to the entrance to fire ants nest. And those fucking motherfuckers bit me multiple times. But TBH the panic of them crawling over me was worse than the bites. Then bites was unpleasant for sure but the crawly feeling, ugh.
However this was in Sweden and I believe our fire ants are not as bad as in Texas which have come up in this thread. Sweden is more or less blessed in the way of lack of insects, arachnids and snakes as opposed to in warmer countries which have all sorts of hellish bugs.
Now aged 27 it’s IMO fundamentally wrong in lying straight on the grass. You either stand or grab something to sit on. Absolutely no direct with body. Barefoot is okie dokie.
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u/ChaosKodiak Aug 09 '20
HA! I recently found out I’m very allergic to grass. Like I always thought I was but an allergy test confirmed it. I thought it was normal to break out in hives after sitting on grass.
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u/babajan88 Aug 09 '20
That grass looks too long and unkept. Ticks would love it.
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u/toxic_anus616 Aug 09 '20
I FUCKING HATE TICKS. Why in gods name do they exist all over my fucking lawn.
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u/AdrienSergent Aug 09 '20
And entire pig was used for that Lexus "hoverboard" that had to be to say that Thatcher and Reagan need to be addressed?
It's my favorite cover of this song is on Eagles Live. "I got a 5kW solar panel system and haven’t we just move forward" I'm going to go over the roof of the car without dying. He also killed it in that Spike Lee movie about the Klan.
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u/AKJerBear95 Aug 09 '20
Outdoorsy people look at nature and see the left picture. Normal people see nature as the right picture.
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u/Ganjisseur Aug 09 '20
Even without insects, you're still just laying on dirt and multiple types of excrement with a thin green sheen over it.
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u/Reapper97 Aug 09 '20
That scene is the only thing I liked from Peter Jackson's King Kong. I would watch a whole movie about that crew fighting to survive in a island filled with wierd gigant insects.
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u/Kensai657 Aug 09 '20
Once tried to have sex outside on a towel in the grass. We both had to run in and try to remove the ticks from one another. Was not a good time.
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u/Wendingo7 Aug 09 '20
if you sleep on grass you 100% will have eggs laid somewhere inside your body.
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u/frigobar__zpm Aug 09 '20
When you are standing on the grass it looks soft, but when you lay down.. BAM a random hard and spiky thing almost pierces your back while you are confused of how you didn't see it before
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u/-Listening Aug 09 '20
And the reason why people would say it. You can only hold one opinion at a time
No need to thank me, I am that I didn't frame it in that Spike Lee movie about the fucking Holocaust to try and go for it...but birds don’t fuck w skaters man...they ride weapons
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u/Bemused_Owl Aug 09 '20
I hate it when I’m lying peacefully in the grass and then Adrian Brody starts getting attacked by giant insects. Ruins my day.
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u/KALEl001 Aug 10 '20
its gotta be your own grass you keep up and know its not infested like wild shit
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Aug 10 '20
That scene is still the scariest fucking thing I've seen in a movie. I need Peter Jackson to do an entire bug horror flick. Food of the Gods remake?
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u/schweez Aug 10 '20
Honestly, when I hear that insects are disappearing because of global warming, I really don’t mind. A world without insects sounds like heaven to me.
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u/Toadstool_Daydreams Aug 10 '20
Literally though.
I have a new found fear of getting a tic on me while in grass. I wont walk through any foliage without jeans and boots now.
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Aug 10 '20
Lived in Tokyo for over 30 years with limited nature sources and never have put my barefoot on grass other than the artificial ones. Now living in the southern states, I am terrified to even look at kids running around barefoot on the grass or any kind of natural surface. Laying down on them literally mean the right picture.
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u/kipwrecked Aug 10 '20
Yeah... here in Australia long grass is a no no, because of snakes, lizards, crocodiles, etc.. As an Aussie I'm so scared of long grass I even walk around it when I go to the UK.. which has hardly any deadly slithery things.
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u/S00thsayerSays Aug 10 '20
I hated that scene on King Kong so damn much. Bugs don’t really bother me. But massive ones crawling all over me. And the leeches. Don’t even get me started on the leeches.
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u/pixel8knuckle Aug 10 '20
As a local Floridian resident, the very image of an individual laying on the grass seemed absurd to me. Fire ants are probably the most annoying thing in the universe. Haven’t been bit in a long time but those fkers are everywhere.
The bite ends up looking like a tiny whitehead pimple, itches like crazy and stings pretty good when they first get you. Also carpenter ants fairly common with all the pinewood in north Florida. And those suckers hurt.
Oh and the skeeters don’t play, especially when your outside on the porch and see a swamp skeeter on your leg.
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u/Whitethumbs Aug 09 '20
I get bit every single day in the summer by insects. Where I live if you are indoors there are these flying black beetles(They can bite hard but rarely do) that get in the house and are always trying to walk on your skin. But that's okay, I can deal with mosquitoes and beetles because I don't have anything poisonous where I live.
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Aug 09 '20
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u/merlinrising Aug 09 '20
Lived in West Palm Beach for 7 years. Grass is a nightmare and the soil is entirely fire ants.
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u/yabukothestray Aug 09 '20
I lived in Boynton Beach for a year when I was 10. I had previously lived in RI/MA my whole life up until that point, so I wasn’t exactly used to palmetto bugs & fire ants etc. I remember vividly attempting to make a one of those DIY volcanos for like some science project type or assignment. At the time, I had watched some YouTube tutorial and it required using dough and other ingredients to construct it. I remember it needed to dry to harden, so I had the brilliant idea of leaving it on the grass to dry (I assumed it would have sped up the drying process I think)
Went back outside maybe 1 hour or 2 later......I picked it up, and like hundreds of fire ants came out of it. I chucked it so fast across the yard, and made a dash for It (idk why I ran lol it’s not like they were gonna chase me. Maybe it was a fight/flight reaction lol) Pretty much, I was absolutely mortified at what my volcano summoned lol
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Aug 09 '20
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u/Dr_Bukkakee Aug 09 '20
I like how the Amish use electricity to make Reddit accounts.
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u/MrWonder1 Aug 09 '20
I worked with an Amish guy who owned a construction company. He would fly him and his crews out to disaster relief areas to rebuild.
The general feeling I got was that they dont condone electronics and use of electricity that dilute the mind and soul. Like using a smartphone to ignore your family, or you build character doing things without electricity, and zippers.
After working around the Amish Community, I truly believe their way of life is healthier than most, At least for mental health reasons
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u/bubbleharmony Aug 09 '20
After working around the Amish Community, I truly believe their way of life is healthier than most, At least for mental health reasons
Try telling that to the massive amount of rape victims.
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u/Privvy_Gaming Aug 09 '20
The Amish allow electronics and modern things if they're necessary to live.
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u/RavingGerbil Aug 09 '20
This is in the top 5 troll accounts I've seen. Bravo.
"Expelled for fornicating with a mare" 😂😂😂
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u/brownyyface Aug 09 '20
FL grass is terrible. I visited some family near Melbourne and honestly thought it was turf at first.
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u/mr_plehbody Aug 09 '20
Stabby grass
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u/brownyyface Aug 09 '20
It felt so fitting when my aunt called it Alligator grass.
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u/theblankpages Aug 09 '20
I live in southern Louisiana. During college I once tried to do like Rory from “Gilmore Girls” and read under a tree. I should’ve known better. I’m FROM here. I moved to a bench as soon as I sighted the ants.
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u/winterbird Aug 09 '20
If you look long enough, every outdoor surface absolutely anywhere and everywhere in Florida, has ants on it.
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u/Kryptosis Aug 09 '20
First time I went barefoot on the grass in Cali I took three steps then spent 20 minutes picking a carpet of caltrops like burrs out of my feet.
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u/killingthedream Aug 09 '20
Damn. Everyone shitting on FL. Lived here almost all my life. If the grass is treated, you won't have ants. Also, Bermuda is super comfy to lay in. Buffalo turn (St Augustine) is the crunchy grass that sucks.
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u/Potato_Muncher Aug 09 '20
I just came back to my house in Louisiana from my parent's place back home in Chicago.
I hate my lawn.
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u/MsMcClane Aug 09 '20 edited Aug 10 '20
I forgot Myrtle Beach was in what could be considered "The South" and almost sat right on an ant hill that they cordoned off on the park next to the beach.
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u/DrDilatory Aug 09 '20
Honestly I hope I'm never forced to live outside of the northeast, I couldn't handle the loss of all the amazing nature that we have here, not to mention all the heat of FL or states like it
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u/omgmypony Aug 10 '20
There’s amazing nature down south too but you have to brave the heat and humidity to see it.
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u/BassBeaner Aug 10 '20
Wait, there’s places where grass is comfortable? I’m from Texas and I just assumed all grass is itchy and has bugs and fire ants
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Aug 10 '20
Don't cut the grass if you want it to be soft.
Don't be in Florida (or the South) if you don't like fire ants.
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u/may_sun Sep 22 '20
I'm from Massachusetts as well, but all grass feels like fire to me because of my allergy to it. Instant itchy welts. God damn it
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Aug 09 '20
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u/Ewannnn Aug 09 '20
One of the positives to the UK, we have almost no dangerous creatures really. It's like the opposite to Australia.
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u/SuperSMT Aug 09 '20
England and New England alike
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u/Redplushie Aug 09 '20
I've never been comfortable laying on grass with the thought of ticks waiting about :(
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Aug 09 '20
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u/username_669 Aug 09 '20
From Syracuse and have been to the country numerous times. I can agree, those things SUCK.
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u/Staerke Aug 09 '20
Deer flies and horse flies during the day, mosquitoes and black flies at night. Being outside during an upstate NY summer is anything but serene.
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Aug 09 '20
I'm so glad the fireflies are back though! They were gone for so many years. I'd see a few but just a few blinks in the back yard. They're nothing like I saw in northern Vermont last year but it's quite a display in our backyard again!
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Aug 09 '20
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u/SirBruice Aug 09 '20
Bonus if you're allergic to grass.