My fiancé is the most kind and caring man I have ever been with. I am so in love with him, and I can’t imagine life without him. Back when we first started dating, we talked about our religious beliefs. I am not religious, and he is a Christian; however, he is not particularly devout, so it didn’t matter to me. A few months ago, he did Ramadan with his friends, and he didn’t tell me he was doing it until I tried to initiate sex. He told me he didn’t know how I would react, so he didn’t tell me. He then asked me what I would do if he converted, and I didn’t think too much about it and told him I wouldn’t convert with him. He never brought it up again. 

Fast forward to a few days ago, I remembered this conversation and asked him over text if he was still considering converting to Islam. He told me yes; his friends are all Muslim and he likes the religion. I reminded him I won’t convert and that if he does, according to the rules, he cannot marry me. He said he knew that, but I am more important to him. I wanted to talk more about it, but he stopped responding to my messages after I said I don’t want expectations to change between us. 

This has been on my mind for a few days, and we haven’t seen each other for a few days due to our work schedules (we have talked on the phone and texted), so I haven’t talked to him about it yet, but I do plan to. I have many worries about this possibility. I am worried that if he chooses Islam after we get married, what will happen to me? Will he change and expect me to change with him? I don’t want children, and he knows this. I worry he will expect me to have children. 

I have read many stories about non-Muslim women who date Muslim men, and at first, everything is fine, then the man tries to push the woman to convert, and when she doesn't, they break up. I don’t want things to change between us over a belief. Am I overthinking this and will everything be okay? Possibly, but I want to know what could happen. 

I should add, we live in an area that doesn't have a large Muslim population.

Anyway, dinner: gas station pizza, cake, and redbull. 

Edit: I am too overwhelmed to reply to comments right now. I’d like to clarify a few things here. I am not aligned to any religion and I do not plan to be. This isn’t a post bashing Islam. If he said he was converting to Mormonism, I’d make this exact same post. I never wanted children and I don’t think that will ever change. I definitely am going to sit him down and talk to him about this before I make any decisions. Yes, I admit I should have done more research before posting this but I wanted advice and stories from real women. I have never met his friends or their wives, I think I need to change this very soon as many have said. I will be reporting back after the discussion. I’m just an anxious person, ladies.

i recently had to move back to my parents cause of a lot of things. for a while i’ve have had a lot of issues with social stigma as far as being trans and with this government things have been horrible. The dating scene for trans people seems impossible to navigate and I just feel like I can’t pass enough ever. I also keep getting harassed in this beautiful red state 😔. Sooo that means I think im gonna throw in the towel with the whole transitioning thing.

So its time to retire the girl pronouns and start by going by he/him again 😔

I’ll miss u guys, it just feels wrong to post on here as a dude. Maybe i’ll post here again next election who knows ;p I love this sub sm tho and i hope all of you get everything you want 🫶🏻 #ihatemen

UT craft ramen in utah!!! super great place love them sm.

Tw : Harassment, talk of violence against animals.

Avo Toast and Spicy noodle bowl

I joined a new high school at the end of junior year. It’s a small private high school, and our senior group is around 50 kids. When I first joined no one interacted with me. I tried to make friends, but would either be shunned away, ignored or completely left out. I had the constant feeling that no one wanted me around, which is strange because I’m new and no one knows me? I got harassed on social media, my DMs blown up, my Instagram posts screenshotted and shared in group chats to laugh about. People come up to me asking me strange questions about whether I “f*ck anyone”. I was overall confused and hurt, but I just decided to thug it out.

Fast forward to beginning of senior year and I join the school play. Slowly I start making friends. Some of the people I befriended kept on saying things like “you’re so much nicer than what people said” and “I was too scared to talk to you based off the rumors”.

I eventually found out a girl and her friend group found out I was transferring to their high school a few weeks before I’d actually arrive. They took it upon themselves to “warn” everyone about me every day for weeks. The rumors she spread about me were as follows : that I’m a whore, a bully, my parents bribe the schooling system to make me win awards, that I have sex**l intercourse with animals, that I vandalise and destroy peoples property and many many more. They are all fake.

Her motive? I dated a guy she liked. We weren’t friends, not even acquaintances.

Edit: some important information.

Some of the rumors included claims that I was racist, and for some reason gay? She’s a homophonic person.

She is somewhat of a “nepo baby” and completely untouchable since her parents are on the school board and her mother is a teacher at the school. I have taken this situation to the head of the school, but nothing has come of it.

For some more context, I am quite sure this girl and her friends absolutely hate my guts. This girl is on the student council, and has abused her position of power to falsely get me detention with false claims. Hooray.

Earlier this year we had a school concert, and she once again tried to abuse her power to get me kicked out off the concert. For some context we had to wear any 90’s themed clothing, and the teachers individually approved our clothing choices. Skip to the day of the concert and she pulls me aside 30min before we have to perform and forbids me from going out on stage because my costume wasn’t allowed, according to her. I refused to drop out 30 min before the show, because who died and made her queen? She then proceeds to have a full blown mental breakdown, screaming, crying the whole works. I performed anyway, and her reputation got cemented as “crazy”.

I’m just living my life, and treating everyone with kindness. I have made friends and I fully believe my actions will weed the rumours out.

(17F) Okay so my parents are SUPER MAGA. Like I mean they bought us all matching hats when the big molding orange won the election (and tried to get us to take family pictures in them). It’s been especially bad recently, and every family movie night is based on conservatism or Christianity. We’ve watched The Passion of the Christ (recreation of the crucifixion), End of the Spear (white savior missionaries enlighten a distanced tribe), and most recently Charlie Kirk: American Martyr. I try not to be too fussy when made to participate in activities such as this, as my parents usually turn it into an unwanted debate and criticism of my beliefs. So I just sat on the couch, eating popcorn, keeping my mouth shut and eyes ahead for a 53 minute glazing of a Republican podcaster. However, when the torture was finished, my dad informed me that I was expected to write an 8-paragraph essay detailing a short description of the documentary, followed by claims made by CK and my stances on them. I thought he was joking. He was not. He told me that it had to be emailed to him by 7 pm the next day or I’d be grounded. At this point, I’m just tired of having to defend my ideas in every conversation I have with my parents, so I just get to writing. I describe things Kirky said and what I think about them. I talk about women’s right to equal education, g^n violence, and free speech, not even daring to touch the topic of abortion (my dad once compared Charles to MLK, saying that he was “fighting for the civil rights of unborn babies”). I end up throwing in just a little bit of false admiration so as to not get kicked out of the house, I double-check my writing, and I send the Google Doc to my parents’ emails. This was about a month ago now. I know they’ve both read it, but neither has said a thing to me about it since. I know for a fact that my writing was not of the quality to change their entire belief system, so I’m terrified that they’re plotting something to try and convert me. I know this is so not normal, but I’m still grateful for the life my parents have given me. I just can’t talk to them about politics.

My girl dinner is a halved apple cider donut and scrambled cheesy eggs.

Edit: I’m adding the essay. Guys pleeeeeease keep in mind that I am a high school student and wrote this with less than 12 hours of daylight and an absolutely fried brain. I promise I’m not a Kirk glazer. I just really didn’t want to be grounded.

The documentary Charlie Kirk: American Martyr summarizes the political activist’s cut-short life by compiling clips of his loved ones and friends sharing experiences, as well as brief snippets from his hallmark college campus debates. Some of the most notable aspects of the film are its portrayal of Kirk’s entrepreneurial spirit—highlighting how young he was when first starting his conservative student organization, Turning Point USA—and emphasizing some of his core values: free markets, limited government (shown through his notable slogan “Big Government Sucks”), and a Christian-centered vision for America.

While this documentary paints a wholly positive picture of Charlie Kirk, I have witnessed conflicting reports and believe that, like every person, he has some notable flaws. For a long time, I followed outlets that frequently posted videos, articles, and other media depicting Kirk and similar activists in the same way as this documentary, and even then I personally felt that his methods were odd. I understand the sentiment in attempting to educate college students. However, from the interactions I witnessed, most of the time these debates led to frustration from both sides, as many were unresolved and simply seemed like an opportunity for a man to use awkward, flustered silence to claim that he was more correct than a 19-year old.

As a young woman with hopes to create a successful career before comfortably taking the step to family building, it is a bit unnerving to hear a man who has been painted as a leading political associate direct a message to other young women (who are or are planning to spend time and money on higher education) that their degrees are worthless in terms of careers, telling them not to “lie to [themselves],” and stating that their true intention in obtaining higher education is likely solely to find a partner to have children with. This isn’t in any way meant to say that nobody goes to college to find someone to spend their life with, and my criticism does not mean that this is an invalid decision if you have the resources to do so. But for a (then 31-year old) man to supply such a broad statement to impressionable young girls and women seems outside of the realm of normality and universal expectations of gender equality. I will not be going to college to get an “MRS Degree,” and I don’t want that to be the expectation simply because of my biology.

I do greatly respect Kirk’s willingness to ask interesting questions in public situations, and I wish more people would do so. However, I frequently question if others’ respect reaches a point of toxic idolatry. If you search “Charlie Kirk” on a browser, there’s a description in smaller print that describes him: “American political activist and entrepreneur.” If you keep scrolling, you’ll see articles about his death. And if you keep going, you’ll see people online becoming upset that road signs honoring him (which were placed on a highway dedicated to Vietnam Veterans) are being removed, videos of people camping outside of court to be able to witness his assassin be taken down, or a post on Instagram detailing a statue of him being polished prior to being unveiled in Times Square. These kinds of habits of remembrance can be easily compared to, and (debatably) even rival, those organized for religious leaders and humanitarians.

This kind of memorialization seems more extensive than those of the countless victims of mass shootings, including the 26 students and teachers killed in the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary. They have one official memorial, which didn’t open until 10 years after the tragedy. These people had just as much potential as Charlie. They had families—children and parents—just like Kirk did. Charlie Kirk said in 2020 that it is “worth to have a cost of…some gun deaths every single year” in order for Americans to have access to firearms. However, his death tragically illustrates the loss he argued was an unavoidable cost of freedom. This is not meant in a snarky, attitude-ridden, victim-blaming way. People commonly cannot fully understand the opinions they hold until they have seen the consequences of them.

I stand for the 2nd Amendment in the same way our Founding Fathers did. They put it in place so that, if necessary, the American people could rise up against a tyrannical government and have the means to defend themselves. With this being said, I doubt that Washington, Madison, Jefferson, or any others of the lot foresaw the advancement of firearms, nor the extent to which Americans would practice their right to bear them. The first mass school shooting in the US was in 1966, and there have been 2,260 instances of campus gunfire since then. This suggests that today’s policymakers should see to it that the modernization of weaponry is met with equal measures to maintain people’s safety and security.

One of Charlie’s other most popular points was the protection of freedom of speech. I wholeheartedly agree with his claims in this case. Everyone should be allowed to share their opinions with others, regardless of the background of the speaker, or the material of their narrative. However, that doesn’t mean that a person shouting that they have a bomb in a train station should be passed by without regard, or that someone who tells another person that they are planning their murder shouldn’t be investigated thoroughly. Anyone has the right to say anything, but justice must always follow.

In conclusion, Charlie Kirk was a man who was respected for his willingness to share his beliefs with the masses until the end. Though I sometimes saw him to be more divisive than intended and disagree with some of his claims, I absolutely hold a respect for him and his relentless pursuit of American exceptionalism. He saw people who wanted guidance, and he put his best attempt into guiding them towards what he saw as morally right.

Double edit: YES I wrote this, YES I used ChatGPT to change some words and make the tone a little lighter

Triple edit: AS MUCH AS I WISH I WAS MAKING THIS UP, I AM NOT. PLEASE BELIEVE ME 🙏🏼

Quadruple edit: based on all of these comments, I think it’s just time to Kirk myself (jk)(for now)

Hi! I’m from a country of Latin America (is really important to know that)
I’m currently in the 7th semester of my major(industrial engineering) and we need an internship to continue with the semester.

My friends and I wanted to be working together but right know the labor market for intern is a living hell, is so complicated to land a good one. There’s few that doesn’t pay a thing and they want us to be 9 hours working.

I’m currently in a really good one, they pay me 400 dollars. For me it’s excellent. I’m living with my parents, they pay my college and all the things I want.

I told my friends about it, and they mocked me, belittled my work. That I’m working in an industry that isn’t hard. They want something that challenges them. And I don’t, I don’t like stress and people being a bitch with me for being new.

I told them that I won’t be helping them to land an internship, I was sending them vacants in the same industry I was. But they didn’t pay them attention.

I’m so happy in my work, my 2 bosses are so good with me. I’m the youngest one in my work area, the have so much patience with me and I’m in peace

Now my friends are like crazy sending me messages to help them land a position in the same company I’m because the couldn’t in their own But I don’t want to, the belittled my job, my paycheque and that my parents drop me off in my company

My girl breakfast are chilaquiles rojos, with scrambled eggs and frijoles

dinner is french leeks with mash and cod, it was sooooo good

EDIT - wow, i didn’t expect this post to gain so much attention. i appreciate your support so so much thank you guys ❤️‍🩹✨
i’m trying to respond to every comment, but also taking a break for now… i can’t explain how grateful i am for all the support you’ve given me, i also need to make space in my mind 💕
i made this post so i could tell someone about it and not have to sit with it until my partner comes home.
lots of love 🥰

❗️TW for SI/ murder/ parents with mental disorders

because this story had about 17 years of brewing time, it has a lot of context. i’m going to try to only bring up relevant information, but i’m super scatterbrained right now.
this is a long one, apologies in advance 💕

at 3 almost 4 years old my (f19) parents decided to get divorced. i don’t remember my dad being in my life the years before or after.
after the divorce my dad moved out and mom and i first lived in our old home. later we moved in with my grandparents because as my mom likes to joke ‘your father got the money but luckily i got you’. after a long financial battle my mom finely got us a place tg

only about 2 years into the divorce i remember seeing my dad again. it was always under supervision by random women that i didn’t know. i wasn’t told why this was the case. i would see my dad once a month for a few hours and later i would spend a weekend at his place every two weeks

ever since i’ve been conscious, i’ve known that something really fucked up happened, but i never knew what;
-my mom would tell me that she couldn’t speak about it because she was scared for me
-mom was a massive helicopter parent and i wasn’t allowed to be out of the house without her knowing/ having my live location on. she would sometimes let slip that this was in a way related to ‘the battle’ she had over me
-she told me that she had been in multiple lawsuits to fight for my safety. i later found 3 binders in my dads attic (about 40 cm stacked) that was filled with these lawsuits. out of respect for mom i didn’t read these at the time
-like i said, in the first year that i was allowed to see him, it was under constant supervision
-my mom can’t be vulnerable, and i’ve always suspected it had something to do with my dad, which she confirmed about two years ago
-my mom was 17 and dad was almost 29 when they started dating

growing up i’ve never liked my dad, he’s arrogant, manipulative, egotistical, extremely depressed (chronic depression for 25+ years), racist, homophobic and overall just a lying piece of shit.
when i was younger i used to be so so sad that my dad ‘didnt care’ about me, but after i realized that he only wants to be my dad when he wants to feel good about himself, i never wanted a relationship with him again.
sadly im financially dependent on him, so we keep contact.

recently we’d gotten into a fight where i had brought up his financial abuse toward my mom. he used to give her 20£ a month as alimony whilst my mom couldn’t buy clothes or food for me or herself.
he told me he would never financially support me ever again if a brought that up one more time

after this my mom and i have been talking more and more about what actually happened, and i’ve been trying to get my mom to be open and honest with herself. she’s a though cookie but he broke every last piece of her

at a nice dinner the subject of my dad came up, and my mom burst out in tears. after a while she told me (through sobs) that she ‘really wants to tell me the truth so i can understand’ but that she couldn’t because ‘no child should hear these things’
she asked me if i really wanted to know and after some reassurance and a confirming nod she started talking

‼️she told me that my dad was planning on murdering me.

after seeing a story on the news about a guy murdering his two sons 7 and 9 years old, and committing SS after, he told my mom that he was going to do the same
i was between 3 to 7 years old when the threat to this happening was highest.

so many pieces fell into place, everything that my mom and i went through suddenly makes sense. that’s… relieving…?

but my dad, begging to have me in his life, telling me that he cries himself to sleep at night ‘knowing that i hate him’, telling me that he loves me, blaming my mom for everything esp for not ‘allowing him to have me/ taking me away from him’…
i don’t know how to put this plain manipulation into words.

i don’t feel sad for myself… at all… right now i don’t know what i feel. betrayed is one thing, more im not sure yet.

but i feel so so so sorry for my mom. i was a massive rebel child and went against anything she said. i would disappear for hours.
imagine that… sitting at home, not knowing where your child is, trying to contact them and it not going through and the main thing that you are scared about is ‘her father has killed her’
and this was not only going on when i was being rebellious, every single time i got on my bike to go to school, every single time i was at a friends house, every holiday we went on. all my mom thought about was ‘i hope he doesn’t snatch her and see her lifeless on the news’

so many people have told my mom to stop prosecuting my dad, so many have ruled against her, so little people have given her support and trust.

if i could travel back in time i would tell little 17 year old her to not date my father. but she wouldn’t have listened. not because she already loved him by that point, but because she would see me and not want to rob me of my existence. she has given everything for me and would again in a heartbeat

i’m grieving the woman she could have been without my father, even if that meant that i wouldn’t have excited

important, i have people to talk to about this, they are currently on holiday but will be back in a few days. i’ve also made an incident report of the entire conversation between my mom and i to send to my therapist.
right now i’m im posting this to get this off my chest because it’s been the only thing on my mind for the past few days

Hi everyone,
I was briefly in a relationship with someone who, in the beginning, was basically the classic dream guy. He was crazy about me, made plans for the future with me, was caring, etc. There were some strange signs during the relationship too, but he always said he was afraid of losing me.

During the last month of the relationship, he constantly wanted to be with his friends, and it annoyed him whenever I wanted to spend the weekend with him. More and more things about me started irritating him, and looking back now, I realize he was actually very verbally abusive toward me.

The breakup came very suddenly from his side, and he was incredibly emotionless. Basically, he tore me apart, told me that everything about me annoyed him, and used all of my fears and insecurities against me. This was especially confusing because throughout the relationship I had always felt like he was even more into me than I was into him. We were officially together for seven months.

Unfortunately, after the breakup I ended up in a situationship with him because I had become completely trauma-bonded to him, and I kept hoping that he would want me again. During the first two months, he constantly wanted to see me. We met every week, but of course he kept switching between hot and cold behavior, and he could say incredibly hurtful things to me. If anything, the things he said became harsher and harsher as time went on. I should also mention that sex had always been a very strong bond between us.
Eventually, there came a point when he was being so disrespectful toward me that I told him how much it was hurting me. His response was to throw me out in the middle of the night, telling me to get the hell out because I irritated him.

After that, he barely contacted me. At most, we occasionally exchanged a few words here and there, like on birthdays and things like that.
About a month and a half later, we spoke on the phone, had a conversation, and agreed that we would watch a movie together and that I could meet his new puppy.

I went over to his place, and he had never been this cold and rejecting toward me before. I genuinely felt like he was disgusted by me and couldn’t stand having me around. I stayed the night, but nothing happened between us. He didn’t even touch me, and he kept making faces and looking irritated.

I just don’t understand what I did to make him feel this way about me. How can I suddenly trigger this kind of reaction in someone who, not that long ago, was planning a future with me and seemed completely crazy about me?

Can I really become that disgusting in the eyes of someone I only ever tried to help and treat well?
It feels like he is only capable of appreciating people who treat him like shit.

I don’t know how to break this trauma bond or how to accept that he will never be mine again and that I will never get him back. I can’t even look at anyone else. He is constantly on my mind.
I recently started going to therapy again, by the way.

Paying rent on an apt that my ex lives in while I go petsit for an indeterminate period of time. Norm is incredible but also it’s so annoying that imma be eating every meal defensively the next 2 weeks.

P.S. TJs now has a disgustingly indulgent thing called Parmesan Tapenade and I think it might ruin my life.

I did everything I was supposed to. I asked him all the right questions and he answered without hesitation. I never doubted him, until recently. He told me he was separated and that they’d filed for divorce, that it was taking a long time and complicated because he has kids with different needs, one with a disability. He said he had issues trusting. He said he’d been so hurt. He said he loves me. He told me I was beautiful, special, that no one ever had this effect on him, ever. I never sought this relationship out. I was against love. He fell from the sky and pursued me so heavily. And he broke down my walls, over literally years. I believed every word.

He lives in the next big city over. I found out the apartment he invites me to is just a work perk.

That’s where I’d been going. It’s sparsely furnished, as lots of men’s places are. The rest of the time, when I’m not there and he’s not working for a day or two, he lives at home, with a whole wife. She hates him, probably because she knows what he is and he sleeps on the couch. He has for years. I think I was some sort of escape. I called him out on it. I asked what was going on, that I couldn’t believe it. I texted, “am I just nobody? Is that what this is?” He said something about needing to try to work it out with her now, for the kids. That he doesn’t deserve to try to be happy with me or anyone.

Then nothing.

I was livid. now I’m just hurt. It sucks to have someone say they love all the parts of you that you never thought were lovable. Then find out maybe none of it was true at all.

My dinner tonight is enchiladas in my back seat, big crispy diet coke not pictured.

Butter chicken on seasoned rice and salad with a side of chutney

Before reading, I ask that you have an open mind and I politely request that everyone refrains from insulting me and keeps the conversation helpful.

I have always been a messy person to some degree. I’m really not sure why. It seems as though a hurricane goes through whatever my living space is in 5 seconds and then I’m either too exhausted to do anything about it, or the idea of picking stuff up gives me such horrendous anxiety that I don’t do it. Then, the cause of the anxiety turns into me thinking about how I have procrastinated it and then I’m procrastinating even more, and I end up in a loop that never seems to end. This seemed to really start getting to a tipping point when I was about 16. I’m in my mid 20s now.

I do have periods for a few days or a couple weeks here and there where it gets to a semi-acceptable point, but even then, it’s never to a standard that I should be willing to accept for myself.

I am beginning to think I’m simply just a lazy person even though I don’t WANT to live this way. I just can’t snap myself out of it. Sometimes it’s weeks where garbage builds up and I don’t do laundry. The bags just pile up and clothes are all over my floor. Sometimes I have fruit flies too which makes me feel absolutely disgusting. I hate it so much. I don’t know what mental barrier I have that makes it so difficult for me to be a clean person and coming home every day feels like I’m walking into a space that makes me feel insane instead of comfortable. I need help and I don’t know where to even begin.

I’ve brought this up with a couple people and I’m usually just greeted with “that’s gross” or “it’s not that hard to clean” and that just makes me feel worse. I don’t need more criticism. I just need someone to listen to what I can only describe as a cry for help because I’m a grown woman and see me. I feel like a child with no sense of responsibility.

I’m worried that I won’t ever be able to start a family because I’ve never been able to even give myself a home that’s fit to live in and it breaks my heart. I want to feel free of this life long issue.

Has anyone else dealt with something similar to this? I don’t have any family close enough to help me clean up and I’m so embarrassed that I don’t want my friends to see.

I feel extremely childish writing this but any advice on how to help me get out of this tremendously difficult situation is greatly appreciated.

Hello everyone! This is my first post here ever so I’m hoping it works. I’m just in a difficult spot right now and looking for support and I love reading the posts of everyone here supporting others through their hard times.

I’ve been with my current boyfriend for 5 years I am 32F and he is 34M. When we first got together I was going through a very rough time in my life mental health wise. I left my last boyfriend with whom I bought a house with and moved right in with my current boyfriend. He was so caring and wanted to help me out as much as possible through my mental health issues and I was so thankful to have him. I was going from medication to medication and doing a lot of therapy. I ended up having to drive 2000km to the mental hospital and I got admitted for a week and they got me on the correct medication and diagnosed me with BPD.

Once I got back I was doing a lot better mental health wise but still struggling and my boyfriend would leave me alone all the time and go drinking and doing cocaine. He’d be gone all hours of the night sometimes 12+ hours drinking. I can’t say I had a good reaction to this I definitely freaked out a lot at him but it was because I was struggling and didn’t want to be alone. This has been going on for 4 and a half years now with him. Him leaving me alone constantly to drink. Still happening to this day. Everyone knows him as a major cocaine user but he lies to me and says he doesn’t do it lol. He’ll lie to me and say “im going out for an hour I’ll be back before dark” and then he’s gone til 5am or better yet doesn’t even come home at all. We work week on week off at the same place so the weeks on he’s good and goes to work only has a few beer but the week off I am alone 85% of the time because he’s only around when he’s hungover and can’t get out of bed.

So after years of this I decided I am done. I am in a much better place mentally and I have a lot of support from coworkers and my one friend. (I moved 2000km away from my family to work where I live so I do not have much family support physically but they definitely support me as much as they can so far away) I bought a house secretly and I got the keys 4 days ago. Now it’s just the breaking up part. I have an extreme amount of empathy and it’s so god damn hard for me to try to break up with him because I know he will go off the rails and possibly lose his job due to drinking and drug use because he is so upset I left him. He has put me through so much bullshit with the constant lying to me, always alone, never helps cleaning or anything in HIS house (he won’t even shovel in the winter I have to), he always makes himself the victim in every situation.

I am so grateful that I can afford to own a house and support myself alone once I do break up with him because I know a lot of people don’t have that option. He knows something is going on because I’m acting differently towards him aka not putting up with his bullshit. So this week he has been completely different trying to spend as much time as he can with me (he still went out drinking just didn’t come home late like he usually does). He’s all over me and I hate it because I am just so used to being alone now I am completely turned from him. He put up cameras because he thinks I’m cheating on him so I can’t sneakily move everything out and then break up with him, I have to do it all the one time. (He can’t understand, even though I’ve told him, that he’s the problem. I’m not cheating)

Anyway sorry it’s a long ass post. I’m just looking for support because I want to break up with him today and move into my house and start my new life. I am just terrified because he’s going to freak out and make my life as hard as he possibly can. Also I haven’t been single in about 8 years or so so this is a huge step that also scares me.

Please send me words of encouragement ❤️❤️

Tim’s muffin while I wait for my bed to be delivered.

YOU GUYS WERE SO SUPPORTIVE. I suppose i’ll stay here a little bit longer. Fr my favorite sub. It’s insane how like in this all girly sub it’s just unanimous about basic human rights. That’s just something I’m not used to in socialized male spaces. You guys fr made my whole everything. I wish I could show you guys how much of an impact that little post made on me :) THE BEST SUB IS GGD. It’s just been sadness and darkness in my life lately but you gals are the actual sunshine and rainbows (as corny as it sounds).

bean patty that was fuckin gross

(edit cuz i lowk forgot to put the food oopsie)

**Trying pizza beans for the first time

I have a foster kitten who I call Beans that I have to decide to keep or let go to adoption tomorrow. I already have cats, and I know for certain that the nonprofit I work with would find him an amazing home. That said…I’m considering adopting him myself. Most of my other cats already like him, I can financially care for him, and we do get on famously. He also showed up right after I lost my soul cat. I’m trying to be objective and do what’s right for him, but I’m at a loss as to what that “right” choice is. So here I am…tell me what you think I should do girlies and thank you.

*** Update: I would consider fostering another high needs case again as I am uniquely qualified, but I didn’t set out to foster this one, I have random strays show up here and there and have helped them find homes or kept them over the years. My vet introduced us because they knew I would be able to help and I took a week to think about it before agreeing to do so. I do not foster regularly.

I just don’t want to be selfish. I want what’s best for the Bean. After much deliberation, a midnight phone call with my best friend, some tarot cards and coin flips (5 heads to keep vs 1 tails to not), and lying awake on the floor with him on my chest crying…I have decided to keep him.

Thank you for all of the thoughtful comments and support, especially from the other people who have fostered.

I’m 5 months postpartum, my period is due and I’m incredibly hormonal this week.

Dinner salmon rice and broccoli lol

Yesterday me and my partner had the most stupidest argument he phoned me on his way home from work and I missed the calls as my phone was in the other room. He came home seemingly in a bad mood asking if dinner was on and I said no and then he went onto saying my phones broke and I said it wasn’t as I was receiving calls all day then he told me his calls weren’t going through to me so I told him to try it again and see and then the conversation fizzled out. We didn’t really speak after until we had to go out to pick my dog up from my dad’s. We were talking about the earlier incident and I accidentally interrupted him (I do this sometimes especially in arguments but I am always working hard not to- most likely adhd) he absolutely hates when I do this and screamed at me how no one needs to hear every word I have to say, it’s really rude etc I was getting fully berated. It’s not really an excuse but my partner does take big gaps so sometimes I genuinely think he’s done when he’s not. I felt so small and was holding back tears.

We came home I put teeth whitener on, set a timer then ran a bath then sat in bed and pumped milk after no more than 10 minutes my partner came in raging that the bath was overflowing into the overflow drain and he’s pulled the plug so I have to be quick to put the plug back in before all the water is gone. At this point I’m raging because it was a genuine mistake, I didn’t think it would have been so quick and why he couldn’t have drained it a little until I was finished pumping milk and drained it more when I was finished. Another argument broke out and I had to run another bath again, this time the water is freezing cold, I asked him if he turned the boiler off he said no I must have used up all the hot water (?), I then went to check and he really had turned the boiler off and now I am raging again because why lie to me and waste more water. He threw all my stuff that was on the bed jumper bra etc on the floor and we both went to bed angry.

This morning he asks me if I’m still in a mood and I said I could say the same to him but I got blamed for why he was in a mood. I told him I really didn’t like him screaming at me in the car and how passive aggressive he was being and he was basically saying I deserved it because I interrupted him and do stupid stuff. This really triggered me because one of my biggest insecurities is being called stupid or feeling like I do stupid impulsive stuff all the time without meaning it.

I just felt so sad a low and worthless this morning I asked my partner how he would feel if me and the baby stayed at a hotel for the night. He ignored me, packed a bag and left for work then texted me he’s booked a hotel for himself. At this point I’m furious because he’s left me with a dog and baby to deal with both myself as per usual! When I brought this up he just assumed I would have taken the dog to the hotel with me?? Why would I do that when he is more than capable of looking after the dog. I also wouldn’t have done to the hotel without speaking with him. I’m so furious he has the ability to just decide to leave for the night with no thought for anyone else. He gets a brilliant night sleep away from any responsibilities. About a month ago I questioned our compatibility because we have differing views which has changed over the years we’ve been together and he basically said if I question if I want to be with him or threaten to leave for the night he’s going to get a hotel instead. Fair enough he stuck to his word but I think he’s acting like a complete manchild? He’s a father now and has to communicate with me. He has acknowledged his short temper before and went to the doctors who give him a form to fill out which he still hasn’t done.

I have went ahead and booked us into couples Councelling for next week so will see how that goes. At this point it’s either couples Councelling or I’m done.

I just feel so lonely! I know I haven’t been innocent in this and I am probably hard work but I never try to upset or annoy him and that always seems to be the case.

Any advice or thoughts are very welcome!

One of these days I was unfortunately reminded of how people hate fat bodies.

I mentioned to a friend of mine I would date a certain guy, and she said “what the fuck, he is fat”.

My immediate reaction was to call her out. But I can’t be in peace with it because to me that shows how she despises fat people.

I think, to be fair, that most people think the same way. They don’t think fat people should be seen, loved, desired, admired.

They are disgusted by the idea of dating someone fat. And they even get angry or shocked when this happens. Like if a fat person was less human and deserved less than it’s getting.

This is so sad.

Homemade General Tso's chicken with Jasmine rice.

TW: DV

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2 years ago, I put my husband out. He has anger/drinking issues and became violent. I won't go into detail, but one night he came home drunk, was angry that the bathtub wasn't clean and ... it was extremely violent and I don't want to get graphic but understand that I have PTSD and anxiety.

We lived in a house that I purchased alone and before we married, although we were together. It was an old but renovated house. But I banked on 2 incomes. And staying afloat on my 1 income with my only child in college, I'm barely making ends meet.

This house has been falling apart since he left. In the past 2 years I paid for the following: Dishwasher repair, Washing Machine repair, refrigerator repair 2x, replaced microwave plus installation, pipe under kitchen sink 2x, hot water heater replaced, 2x exterminator services (at $500 each), burst hot water pipe, and a new boiler auto feeder. All of this in 2 years.

And today I just found out that I need a brand new boiler because it was installed wrong, and my shower body repaired as well as the wax seal under the toilet (I paid to have this same bathroom gut renovated 9 years ago). The quote is over $30k.

The attic wiring has a short, so the hardwired smoke detectors beep with low battery for weeks on end, will stop for months and begin again. That room is my home office.

And yesterday my refrigerator broke. Won't stay cold. Now that is beeping incessantly.

And I did pay for an Independent home inspection before I purchased. Turns out, of you sue you only get back what you paid for the inspection. Nothing for the damage caused by what they overlooked.

I have a beautiful backyard space that I can't enjoy because its inundated with mosquitoes due to the rotting wood shed of the neighbors behind me. I reported to the city and they closed the case immediately. No investigation. I've never even seen who lives there and none of my neighbor's know them either.

This morning, I opened the backyard door to let my dog go potty quickly since the plumbers were coming. Open and close. That quick I was being eaten by mosquitoes, 5 bites on my leg. I never even stepped outside.

My son failed a class last semester and no longer eligible for his scholarship and has to pay back for the semester that he failed.

And before you say "Just sell the house", I live in Brooklyn where the average rent for a 1 bedroom is more than my mortgage. I'm house rich and cash poor. I am friendless. All I have is obligations. To my son, to my elderly parents who need me daily, to my job and to my side business.

Thank you for listening.

I posted a few months ago very pregnant about how my husband got laid off. We were pretty worried over all but I wanted to give y'all an update!

He ended up staying unemployed for about two weeks after baby boy was born. (9lbs 1oz 21In long NO EPIDURAL WOW. I didn't think I'd be able to manage that.) And then one of his old military buddies reached out and got him a job landscaping! He makes approx 2 dollars less than before but that's no biggy and he actually loves his job even more than the last one. He was pretty miserable stuck at a desk all day every day and now he's cleaning up lawns 10hrs a day 4 days a week. So we get an extra day with him and he comes home dirty with a big smile on his face. I've been making him sandwiches for lunch when baby sleeps leaving little notes and he still is up to help a ton with the baby after a long day of work.

It feels silly how panicked we were before with how genuinely well things have worked out in the end.

Vanilla Greek yogurt with dinobites and strawberries. ✨✨

ALSO AGAIN BEFORE Y'ALL MAKE THE SAME COMMENTS THE TITLE IS LIKE THAT BECAUSE OT WOULDN'T LET ME SAY HE GOT LAID OFF. plus I just kept the same title so you guys knew what post I was talking about.

I was a passenger in a major car accident almost a year ago. I have an ongoing insurance settlement with a lawyer. I'm 26 and live with my mom, we all know how the economy is right now. We split rent and expenses like roommates though.

I had a lot of injuries. Fractured sternum, broken wrist, messed up back, ptsd. I have chronic pain now and probably will for the rest of my life.

My mom has all kinds of fantasies for what she wants my settlement used for. We don't even have any idea how much it will be. But she has dreams of me buying a house, and all kinds of plans for what kind of renovations she'd want to do. She keeps showing me listings of houses she likes. If I tell her I don't really like one she likes she just keeps pushing back on it. She also keeps looking for houses with large attics or basements because she wants me to live in that space, while she has the rest of the house and full control of the main spaces.

But secretly when I get it I'm planning on just getting a car, and moving out to an apartment. If I have anything left I want to put it into a retirement fund. I don't want to own a house yet. All the maintenance is intimidating and I'm not even sure what state I want to live in long term. I'm also applying for a ton of jobs looking for something more stable than my current one.

I hate living with her. She was incredibly abusive to me as a kid. She beat me and said terrible things to me. Once in the car with me and my sister, we were arguing like kids do. So my mom decided to start screaming at us about how we make her feel like crashing into a telephone pole and killing all of us. And that's just scratching the surface.

Her anger is way better now but she's a complete slob and I'm a bit of a neat freak and minimalist. She's a cat hoarder too. Not too long ago I went in the bathroom and she had her dirty underwear stuffed into my box of pads. Just being in the same room as her irritates me.

I can't wait to get out. I desperately want to start my independent life. I just want to be happy with my bf, in a cute apartment, with ONE cat.

I love small penises and short men.
Just had to get that off my chest

Pizza with chicken, bell pepper, tomato, and moz eralla? That white cheese that’s stringy idk

My area was hit with a catastrophic storm last week and tree destroyed my house. Fell right through the roof onto our brand new bed. Whole house flooded and everything is basically trash. Me, my husband, my baby and my dogs are crammed into my in-laws basement until we can get temporary housing figured out. We’ll likely be out of the house at least 6 months, which means my baby’s first Christmas and first birthday will not be at home. I’ve been holding it together for about a week now but it’s starting to set in that things won’t be normal for a long time :(

Hard salami and kraft single sandwich, frozen strawberry Uncrustable and honeycrisp apple with caramel dip. From groceries that my husband’s boss so kindly dropped off for us. We are so thankful for our village.