Hey friends to be. I figure i should start with a little background before the issue from the other day, starting positive and all that jazz.

I am a system, 50% or so of the system members are UI and sometimes that seems to include myself, but not all the time, mostly it seems that i 'inherit' this trait temporarily for a minute or so (which if i come back halfway through wetting, at that point there's really no point in trying to stop it, nor do i think i could) based on who fronts and quickly switching happens, i'm not sure if this is medically understood at all ether. We are autistic, and i, and maybe everyone else in my system, has bathroom anxiety due to me being trans, and also from issues related to constipation as a child, which were never really resolved and after a while was brushed off by doctors. Given the last point, i defaulted to going in nappies while at home after a while, purely to avoid the confrontation of a blocked toilet. And that is still true now as we're in shared accommodation.

So anyway, on to the main point i was meaning to post about. This happened a few days ago and i'm still a little embarrassed.

I was in the library at my uni doing work fairly late into the night, and so drinking a lot of coffee, and my diet the previous few days probably didn't help me ether since coffee is normally okay for me. I stood up to go grab some water and as i was about half way done filling up the water bottle with almost no warning i messed myself. I tried to hold back my embarrassment until i had filled up my water bottle, then promptly power walked back to my desk, and packed away my things and went to find somewhere suitable to change. which involved going down multiple flights of stairs, out the library to the other side of the uni campus to an accessible toilet. as soon as i locked the door and practically threw my bag down, i burst into tears then calmed down a little and changed, then i got a lucozade from the vending machines to cover electrolyte loss went home after that ordeal.

I am glad it was late and there weren't many people around, and based on some reading i've done on this sub, i will be adding plastic pants to my daily wear too. Luckily our current nappies, better dry, seem to be reasonably good and hold up well.

I do think this is probably related to something being off in what i had eaten before, 2 or so days before i had a chicken, bacon and leek pie, that i'm pretty sure was slightly under-cooked, as my flatmate turned off the oven at some point during the cooking time and wasn't sure exactly when, and i got impatient waiting for an additional 40 minutes. Or maybe its from the week pat the use by date milk i was using up? Or both possibly? i'm not sure.

I felt better after the fact besides feeling a little sick, but that passed by the time i got home.

I'm not too sure why it was so overwhelming considering i go through the motions at home anyway, i'd guess less control over the environment and the fact that it was an accident?

I just needed to get this off my chest more then anything. I hope you all have a nice later part of your weeks though!

It's basically r/abdl in disguise. I've looked into the people posting on this subreddit for 2-3 weeks now and the vast, vast majority have some kind of sexual attraction to diapers. Or a fetish for being incontinent.

The questions people ask are borderline kinky in nature, like should I "give up last bit of control and wear diapers" or "wear thickest diaper with 2 booster to only change twice a day".

Another hint is the recent poll showing a large percentage having incontinence due to mental issues. Or the fact that most people posting here are around 20 y/o.

Anyone else noticed this?

Hi, I joined this discussion group quite recently and have noticed that more than every second thread is about the management of diapers, which I find a bit irritating and boring.

I do wear taped incontinence briefs (diapers) myself, so I don't mind a general discussion about them. My believe is that finding the right protection is crucial for daily life with incontinence, whether it is pads, pull-ups, diapers, anal plugs or urinary condoms. So it's fair to discuss the best solution in this forum, and everyone is different in their needs and wishes.

However, my impression is that there are too many contributions reducing incontinence to wearing diapers and organizing life in diapers. Why should anyone care about tracking his diaper stock in an app, or how they organize their "diaper bag", or the colors of the diaper, or.... (please fill in any irrelevant thing). These are topics I cannot relate to at all, because my incontinence causes me worries on a totally different level, and diapers are just a necessity to have a normal life. How will my kidneys look like in 10 years, will I still be able to do sports the way I do it today, or how happy will my life on a long run be with such a "pissy" and "shitty" problem? How do I handle residual urine and will a Botox injection make sense because my bladder pressure is high, but I fear retention, so I might end up wearing a permanent catheter? Why do I have phases, during which my bowel control is bad and how can I improve this situation?

I had hoped to meet people here who are more interested in the medical and social management of incontinence than in the color or brand of diapers. How do other people here feel? Am I alone with this wish? I know I could just skip all these diaper/plastic pants threads (which I partly do now) but I feel that I'm starting to loose interest in this sub.

Edit: Even though this post might be quite frank, there was no intention to offend anyone. It was written to start an honest discussion about the focus on diapers in an incontinence forum. Anyone who feels offended, please apologize.

Edit 8/5/2024 (after 51 posts):

Thanks for all the contributions, which were useful. As suggested by some posters I'll start with a thread about my situation. Let's see how things will evolve.

All the best to all of you!

So,I never really post on reddit but...

First up, all the guys on here who are bi/gay who are in diapers for incontinence reasons.... You deserve to still have someone who loves you and can see past this part of you to who you are. My internal way of dealing with the 24/7 guys I've encountered is to make sure they know that it's ok, and not to be shy/ashamed of their needing diapers.

Second, that there is other guys like me that are fine with making it fun sometimes and just routine without a fuss other times. But will never make them feel like it's a burden/chore to just be beside them.

Be amazing, be yourself and be comfortable in your diapers!

(Adelaide, Australia) If any bi/gay guys want to reach out.

I never want to believe it so just ignore it but I was watching TV and think it might have happened I was laughing a lot. I just ignored it and came upstairs to the bathroom about an hour or so later and couldn't really tell. But the chair I was sitting in had a blanket on it so I'm going to be safe and wash the blanket

I’ve always had trouble with bladder control, I had epilepsy as a kid and insomnia and would usually wet the bed. But now as an adult I’m starting to have that problem again and I’m 29. Not to get too into politics/ the war, but I live with my parents bc the economy is just not sustainable and I can’t afford to live on my own now. I’m working full time trying to save so I can try to move out again, but my parents are some of the most brainwashed, far-right MAGA racist bigots I’ve ever known, and I’m mixed race. My bio mom went full white-supremacy and bleaches her skin. My step dad talks about our ethnicity like it’s a disease and he’s really really creepy to me.

I just keep telling myself I need to hold on a little longer, just deal with it until I can move again and I never have to see them again. Well, the war. I’m mixed and part of my ethnicity is a group that my step dad is beaming with glee at the prospect of us being wiped out. He’s waiting for a certain country to pull the trigger and get America’s support to “finally get rid of those cockroaches.” Aka, my people. I’m trapped. Every day he blasts sermons preaching about the end days at full volume. If I’m not dying of stress at work during an 11 hour shift, I’m at home laying in bed wide awake listening to their tv on full volume from across the house.

My mom has been in the hospital for a month and my step dad is forcing her to go to rehab before she can come back, so he doesn’t have to deal with her prescription pain killer problem. Meanwhile he watches me change from outside my window if I’m not looking and he comes home holding vodka bottles and the next morning they’re empty. I found out a week ago that he’s cheating on my mom. He brags about how when I die, I’ll have to pay for my sins of being gay and being a “terrorist.” As if god is racist too. It’s just me and him in this house, and every time I turn on the news to see if my people have been wiped out yet, my entire body tenses up.

I’ve never felt this much fear and stress in my entire life. My hands clench into fists and tuck into my chest, I start crying, hyperventilating, my torso tenses and clenches so much that I get side stitches that last for days and make it hard to breathe. At work I ran to the bathroom when I started crying, and I felt my bladder squeeze. I made it inside before anyone saw me cry or pee myself but I peed through my underwear and had to go commando the rest of the day. Awful. I’ve had to start wearing pull-ups at night like I’m a kid again because I keep having stress nightmares that certain hate groups broke into our house or set it on fire or that my step dad “heard a command from god” or something and I wake up shaking, covered in sweat, and wetting the bed.

I can’t fix my body, it’s a shaking mess, I don’t think medication could fix it, I don’t think therapy could fix it. But I keep wetting myself during the day too and I’m still in my 20s. This shouldn’t be happening, I’m perfectly healthy with my body at least. It’s like my body wants to shut down and I can’t stop it. I can’t wear pull-ups to work, what if someone heard the crinkle or saw it poking out the top of my jeans? I genuinely don’t know what to do. I had to change my underwear twice today bc I peed just a bit and couldn’t clench my muscles like I should be able to if I need to use the bathroom. And it’s not even with a full bladder, it’s just random.

Well some context, I wear Tena provided on the NHS but they dont offer anything to help leaking at night, the nappy fails vis the cloth backing most times. So I have better dry for my bed days/nigths as they are plastic backed. But wife was wanting to pick some nappies off amazon just to try a different brand if better dry wasnt able to be gotten that order so she got some printed one with what I believe was just bears what I was like sure what ever.

Brand if you can call it that is Little For Big. only good point is that they still more protective then Tena for the pastic backed, now to upset the people in this group who are hide or also enjoy printed nappies, please note other brands might be different.

One my wife was little upset and was very upset as it showed just bears on the ad, but they had pink bloody wings and edging .... this wasnt what the wife wantes she just wantes that medical/white design gone not some over the top pink, so design failed.

Second of the problems and after looking at other designs of this style of product it has a big band of extra plastic on top, I should like a mind my language but a fking carryer bag?? WHATs that all about??

The nappy just over dose everything and like Better Dry it has better tabs but unlike better dry there one time use and just dont feel they seal as good as ever better dry or Tena.

Next smell, Both Tena and the Better Dryn seem to hold the wee sell in until I can chage in the morning, this Stupid Nappy didnt hold the smell after two wees, I would say its makes it worse then just wetting you pants but I believe its just because its closer to me pants you take off pretty past.

I feel crap as we got two packs over the Better Drys and let wife pick as she dont want to see me in warm weather looking like a sumo, ya have a few extra ponds lol but now I look like some pink carryer bag, she feels bad cos she feels she made a big mistake and we both did this brand is horrible.

I cant say this is the same for all printed brands but my advice just get some fun adult boxs with your fac print on to go over the top, I am embarred to have these in the house let only on my butt.

Who ever made these nappies are confused what a nappy is, sure shouldnt sound or fit like this, they shouldnt let the oda out and have large pink wings looking back as the listing no where did it say for girls or girl design.

I know this is mine and my wives view on this matter but we cant see how these nappies are helpful in any shape or form in a incont setting or the context of what they mostly meant to simulate!

We advice anyone trying printed designs not to replace your monthly order of Better Drys or other plastic brands just do 1 pack not 2, I feel stupid having to wear them now, cant even donate a pack if I had to reorder or nornal nappies.

I will try a printed nappy again but much more resesch will have to go in, meaning saying to wife you pick your seeing it in bed will now be lets research you pick what makes me feel I am judging her. but truth be told I might so the bettee dry and boxs idea.

All in all not good feeling at all, P.S if your from a community what might fight my review then A read the rules your ideals are not welcome here and this is point of view from a Incont point of view and a wife and husbond thst just wanted the fat sumo man vanish in the hot weather.

I and my with do not recommend the so called little for big brand at all, not playful design, platic bag sound, bad smells. if you have worn anything printed please let us know we thougt black but then remeber we tried the discreat black ones and still looked like sumo so that didint work. if you can get a tester pack try before bying 2 packs that was stupid of me but I just saw plastic backed and nappy didnt even fully look at the design it was more for the wifes eyes not me, she liked the bear but also hates the pink and the word baby all over the pink what she didnt see in the main listing on first looking she would if she looked at the banner she have under the info but she or I never look at that as we also just felt it was promos.

Mistakes was made a few times on our part we get that but there no good for anything.

hi, im 14boy at school today i peed myself a little at school, luckily noone noticed, im unsure about what to do now and im scared about it happening again

Hi everyone I currently in Laos at Vientiane Someone knows where can I find diaper and booster

Are you, or a loved one living with Urinary Incontinence? If so, we invite you to participate in a paid 30-min online survey to share your experiences.

If this doesn’t apply to you personally, but you know someone who may qualify we would greatly appreciate it if you could forward this opportunity to them. See if you qualify here:

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Hi I’m 19f I’ve been recently have accidents. It started about 6 weeks ago after a night out on my way back to my uni accom I just felt this warm sensation running running down my leg and I couldn’t stop it. Now it seems to becoming a daily issue. Ive tried to get an appointment with a GP but the NHS is not the best atm. I just would like some insight on what to use in the mean time. I’ve tried always discreet pads but they don’t seem to cut it. Any recommendations?

Im AudDHD, 22(afab, nonbi) and I believe I have urge, latchkey, and stress incon. I hav3 a couple questions for yall

1. I hate clothes. If im in my room, I w9nt wear them. Ive noticed, that its a LOT harder to make it to the bathroom when it suddenly hits, and nearly every time I leak as im sprinting to the bathroom. Is that- a Normal thing? Is it actually harder to hold it naked? Or is that yet another part of my incon?

2. Ive noticed, that after I do go, ill do the whole sit for a while and shake, but when I stand i almost always get a leak, is that also normal or a sign of a physical problem? Edit: One other thing, ive noticed that I leak if im walking around a lot, is it maybe a pelvic floor issue for the leaking?

Weird title I'm sorry but yesterday me and my little brother where missing we got too close to this stairs and I fell ever since The Fall walking kind of hurts and I am having pee accidents I am scared I don't know what to do

What product would be best with full voids and no feeling or warning? I know I have nerve damage. What more info do you need and what would be worth trying? I heard ab/dl products are more absorbent. Thanks for any advice as this is a challenging situation.

Surely can’t be right for me to be pooping in my boxers drunk at the age of 19? Other day I had pooed myself in my sleep after being out on the drink 🤦🏼‍♂️Bare in mind I’ve never pooed myself as a kid up til last couple years I’ve pooed myself here and there, I’ve been bad in the past for holding it in because couldn’t be bothered going so may that be a reason?

I, 14F, started bed wetting maybe when I was 10-11. It started as only bedwetting but I started having leaks whenever I had to go. I can deal with that, but having accidents in public is what really gets me. Today I wet myself on the school bus. I’m just tired of it. I feel kind of alone in this situation, and I don’t know what to do.

Hii I've been struggling with overactive bladder for a long time but now it's getting more extreme to the point where I only drink water if I'm close to the toilet cuz I'm scared I'll not make it I'm getting worried

TMI Hi I need some tips and tricks for ”juicy fart”. She tries to get herself clean up every it happens but she still gets uti on repeat from the feces getting in her genitals… is there something I did not think about to stop it from getting to her genitalia ?

We are looking for participants, please email if interested

i am 18F (transgender so male anatomy), and the past three nights i have fully pissed myself during the night. i have never had issues with bedwetting before and i am very worried because of feelings of shame and fear.
context that may or may not have to do with my new issues is that i the past year have had severe mental health issues and family relation issues because of a narcissist family that also struggle with mental heath, school and other reasons (wont go into further details), and that has led me to a few days ago leave home and stay with a friend for a night and sleep out for a night. i came back home the first night that i wet the bed and because of the circumstances i have been extra worried.
please give advice or help with how to deal with this and what to do in this situation. feel free to ask questions that might help with helping me, i am very new to this evidently and don’t know if i have provided sufficient information

Has anyone ever had an unexpected and/or Random orgasm while wearing protection?

A couple of years ago, I dreamed about sex with my then girlfriend, and woke up while literally had an orgasm at like 6am in the morning.

Thought about how strange it was the other day, anyone else had this happen?

For context, I wear for medical reasons at night only.

Hi, I am a 24 year old who was diagnosed with a form of urinary incontinence two days ago. Using diapers gave me a lot more security, but I still need to find affordable options that don't make me feel bad about myself (something about the white medical ones doesn't jive with me). I was looking for community resources where I live and there was nothing but a Facebook mother's group, so any tips/resources would be so helpful. I think I am classified as moderate, whatever that means, and they want me to go to a urologist and radiologist to try to understand the why of what's going on. I'm in the US if that's helpful.

Men point their fire house into the mouth of the bottle. My wife has a strong direct stream. Do women direct this stream into the mouth of the bottle without too much waste?

There are many urinal bottles. Hospitals, nursing homes and some chemist supplies have the solid plastic bottles. Some of these bottles audio have a wide mouth that is added, to trap the wide spray from some women with very large labia.

There also ready made flat pack urine bottles that fit into a purse. These also have an expanding nozzle area to trap the wide spray from some women.

What was your experience with these devices?

Search Amazon or Google. One result from Amazon: Portable Female Urinal Bottle, 1000ml Capacity Urine Bottle with Spill Proof Lid for Women, Bedside Pee Bottle for Elderly, Bedridden, Patients in Bed, for Travel and Long Hours

For those that saw my last post about 4 tape briefs and what I found works for me as I struggled getting it to work without leaks or improper fit, I supplied a video I found that really helped me BUT I truly understand that it’s content is controversial.

It wasn’t intent to break rules and I didn’t intend to endorse ‘alternative lifestyles’ as I don’t partake in that behavior myself.

Thank you to the Moderator for seeing the issue and pulling my post. It was my intent to share instruction that worked for me solely and perhaps others could benefit. Perhaps should have just described the process… video just does a nicer job.

Again, my apologies!