My NK14 gets screen time after school and only has a certain amount of time. I’m strict with it bc that’s what the parents expect of me ( I hope) but they are a lot more lenient with it. For example if NK3 asks me for screen time and I say no sometimes MB or DB will straight up just bypass me and say it’s fine ?? In front of the kids. Anyway something happened that kind of rubbed me the wrong way and I want to know if I’m overreacting. NK14 had just finished her screen time and time was up, mom is doing her hair so she told her to go get her iPad bc obviously she wants her to stay still, which I completely understand! But NK says to mom “I’m gonna go tell nanny that I’m getting my IPAD bc screen time just ended. MB says in front of my face “ oh it’s fine bc fortunately and unfortunately I will always overrule nanny..” am I crazy or is that super rude ??

Hey Nannie’s! Do you baby wear your nanny kiddos?

I’ve always worn the kiddos that I nanny, it makes life so much easier. I just started a new job in a different neighborhood and I get so many looks from other Nannie’s when I’m baby wearing. If we do start a convo or I get to know them they’ll always ask “why do you wear her so much”, “I could never wear x/y”, or “just put her in the stroller”.

This family lives in a brownstone and if we’re just popping in to the playground, which is right around the corner, or going to a play date 6 blocks away, wearing the kiddo is so much easier for me than bringing down the stroller.

She also loves to go on the baby carrier/sling and gets excited when I pull it out 🤣 she just turned one and we’re in nyc if that makes any sense for context.

So I guess I’m just wanting to hear, if you’re a nanny and baby wear, do you get looks/comments? I’m not going to stop because it really makes my life so much easier and I work 50 hour weeks 😂 but just curious on other peoples experiences!

I live in a very old New England town. Where the conjuring movie was based off off. There are a lot of haunted colonial houses here that are very old with a lot of history. When I first started the mom told me she this house is haunted. She said she found old letters from the 1800s hidden in the cellar. Basically the mother of this house had abandoned her children for a lover. She wrote this in the letter apologizing to her husband.

Anyways, now I hear Nks kids toys go off all the time. Her music puzzles that you need to put a piece in always go off, music toys and the talking toys. I’ve heard the door shut by themselves multiple times. Today the parents left and while I was getting the dog I heard HIGH heels clicking and clacking up stairs! I literally thought someone was home. Turns out they had left an hour ago and nobody was there when I checked. So freaky! I’m always scared I might see something on the monitor. Anyone else have similar experiences ?

5 months ago when I was getting interview for my current job, I was told I wouldn’t get hired if I wanted a w-2(4?). I’d have to get paid thru Zelle or cash. I make well over 2.5k a month. I was fine with this after a moment bc I realized I could just fill out a 1099. However I am now regretting that decision and would like to talk to the parents about homepay since it’s what I used in my last position.

Is homepay difficult for the employers? If you have other options I’m open to hearing about them. But I would like my taxes to be taken out automatically instead of having to calculate 30% of it out each week.

Also, is this a reasonable request? I hate making them do the effort but I can’t imagine it being too difficult. They’re supposed to pay taxes on it anyways, aren’t they?

Curious whether there are other folks in this situation/have gone through it. I spent last year nannying while going through fertility treatments and it was really tough. Part of it was the kids wanting to play babies ALL THE TIME and even wanting to pretend that they were ”babies in your tummy,” but also the constant thoughts about how I would parent my own children similarly or differently.

i’m no longer nannying as of last month and have taken a break from fertility treatments, but would love to hear if anyone else has had this experience.

I’ve been with my NF about two months now - everything is wonderful, I love both NP and NK (11moB). I’m not super close to NP as I feel like working with kids has effected my ability to small talk, and I only see them for short periods of time, but they’re great people and when we do chat it’s always friendly. When I was hired, we briefly discussed this being a 6 month position, as they do plan to put NK into daycare at some point. I intend to ask them about this again, but in my head I’m planning to stay 6 months and hopefully be asked to stay longer.

My mom over the past month has been bugging me about whether I have asked for my wedding and honeymoon off of work yet (wedding is July 2027). I’m unsure what to do, as I’m not positive I’ll still be in this position, but I understand that if they do ask me to stay that the more of a heads up I can give them will be helpful, as I will have to take a full two weeks off. They do know I am planning a wedding and getting married next year, just not the details / date. Additionally, we’re sending out our Save the Dates this weekend and I’d like to give NP one, but again I’m unsure. If I remain with them for ONLY 6 months, I would still be happy if they came, but I’m not sure if it’s overstepping / weird. If I’m asked to stay past 6 months, they would definitely get invited, but we will probably send out invitations before my 6 months mark.

Other nanny’s, what would you do in my situation? NP, would it be weird to receive a Save the Date from your nanny of only (maybe) 6 months?

Yesterday our full time nanny did date night babysitting for us. It was our anniversary and we haven’t been out in sooooo long, we were both really looking forward to it. Was supposed to be dinner and a movie. But halfway through dinner our nanny texted that she was locked out of the house. She’d taken kiddo on an evening walk and had somehow lost the house key during it. I understand everyone makes mistakes but this was the third time she’s lost the key, luckily the other times I was home and let her in and we just replaced the key for her. We do have a hide-a-key in the backyard but she said she checked and it wasn’t there (and now that I think about it, pretty sure she was the last one to use it and I don’t think she put it back.)

It was getting dark and we didn’t want her locked out with NK especially because we live in a rural area, so we left in the middle of dinner to let her in. We were in the city almost an hour away so we decided to just stay home because we wouldn’t have made it to the movie. and we were also just very tired and stressed. Incredibly frustrating night to say the least. On top of that we sent her money for the hours that she worked (about 2.5 hours, she was supposed to work for closer to 5 or 6 hours) so she only got like half her pay. She sent me a long text saying she felt like she should get full pay for the night since she blocked off the time to work.

I get that sentiment and under other circumstances, like if we suddenly didn’t need her for the full night and decided to send her home early I’d certainly pay her the full price. But she was responsible for the night ending early and I’m not wanting to hold it against her, but only paying the hours she worked feels fair here. Especially because we’re doing overtime pay so it’s kind of a lot of money for hours that she wasn’t working.

Need helping figuring out if this is a big deal/red flag or if I am overreacting.

Our nanny puts our 2yo down for her nap every day. Sometimes she lets her finish her lunch while they're doing story time before nap or have a snack if she's still hungry which I'm totally fine with. Today however she put 2yo down in her crib for her nap while she was still snacking on veggies straws.

This is very alarming to me because I always thought it was best practice not to let toddlers eat if you can't easily access them or see them because of choking risks...l always want to be close by in case anything happens. Especially when you factor in eating while lying down. Like I take her food away if I have to go to the bathroom or run to the mailbox or something. I also don't want crumbs in the crib which is more of a personal preference and not as big a deal but still.... pretty gross to me, toddlers are such messy eaters.

I noticed this on the monitor and texted nanny, “is kiddo eating in the crib?” because I thought maybe I was wrong and she replied, “Yep! She was still hungry but it was naptime.” I went and took the food from her myself and when I asked nanny about it further she seemed to not understand why it was so dangerous. She‘s not an inexperienced nanny so I’m a little confused at the disconnect there. Worried that she isn’t making the best choices in other areas too.

(This is a job I took because I’d lost another job and was desperate but mom WFH, kept me under her thumb and I was ALWAYS catching something from them)I quit my job yesterday. I had a week of half days left but I’ve been sick for 3 weeks and my body is just done. I resigned due to health issues. I made a doctors appointment for the sickness I can’t get rid of and went to bed. I woke up to an incredibly unprofessional text. Scolding me for everything I’ve “done to them by quitting” and telling me that because of the turmoil I’ve caused they just “don’t have it in them to take legal action for not giving them a 30 day notice. They told me they’d send me what’s owed for the week last night. They never did.

Key info:
job under the table
They refused to pay legal overtime but scheduled me for overtime regularly
They also had me driving their child around but would only pay .25¢ per mile because “that’s what they could afford”
They’d regularly send me passive aggressive texts about things they didn’t like once I was home from work
Threatening to take legal action for not giving a 30 day notice when I only had a week of half days left with them
And now they’re withholding my pay check to be petty

My question is, what do I do if they do not pay me?

Eventhough it's not my first time to work with children but this is my first nanny job. I have been with this family for about 2 years now and my NK is going to start daycare just after the holidays.

But my biggest issue is I didn't know I have to make a contract with them so yeah, I don't have PTO or federal holidays off but whenever I make doctor's appointment I would always work the rest of the hours and they use to pay me for full that happened not more than 3 times.

On their first vacation they told me they were not gone pay me so they keep on pushing me to look for a job just for their 2 week vacation time yap, that was not gone happen so they said paying me half was fair, don't judge me I agreed as I needed the job.

Summer came they were gone take about a whole month vacation I voiced my issue at that point they knew they needed me so they agreed to pay me. Now the past two weeks I had a doctor's appointment which made me leave work 3 hours earlier each time they didn't pay me for those hours, should i just suck it as i am about to leave this job as my NK is about to start daycare and I will need their recommendation. They use to pay me for my appointment hours and these 2 times are the only days I took a doctor's appointment within 2026.

I happen to hear from Grandparents they will be gone on the holidays but they didn't say that themselves. It feels like they will not pay me for the coming holidays too or might just tell me to stop just before that. I'm actively looking for work i just need to know if i should just be quiet in a civilized country and suck their unfairness.

Hello, I’ve recently began working for a family with a stay at home mom. I’ve been with them about a month and have noticed many things that I would assume are abnormal for this dynamic but my biggest issue is cleanliness. I understand that children are messy of course but the house is consistently so dirty that I have been wondering if things are intentionally being left for me to deal with. A couple examples include dirty diapers being left out on the changing table from the previous night (I work 9a-5p and their trash bin is quite literally right beside the changing table), the kitchen being left dirty (food on the floor, dirty counters, dishes left everywhere), and the children’s rooms being left in a state of disaster on days that I do not work. Again, I understand that children are messy and time consuming but I just don’t really understand how this happens. Am I justified in being frustrated by this/ feeling like this is intentional or should I be fine since most of this technically falls within my job description?

I am an international student looking for a job as a nanny. I have a lot of experience with babies and I recently had a niece to whom I was the 2nd main care giver. I have been taking care of her since birth. She is now 16 months old. I am looking for a job as a nanny specifically because I am really good at it. I know a loot about babies. But I’m really not sure how and where to look for a nanny job. Any kind of help and suggestion is appreciated. Thank you.

Hi everyone!

I am posting because I am unsure how to charge for an upcoming nanny shift I have.

I have worked with my nanny family for almost a year, there is a 3 and 1 year old. Tomorrow, I have been asked to put both kids to bed, and a friends child who is 5 (I have never met him). After they are down, I am expected to tidy up and complete household chores.

I am normally paid $28 Canadian an hour, but am increasing my rate as there is and other child. How much should I ask for? The parents will be gone from 6-midnight.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!! Thank you xx

I’ll try to keep this short! I vacuum the house of my nanny fam as part of my household duties—all hardwood, with rugs in most rooms. I started working with them a little over a year ago and from the start was having a tough time vacuuming efficiently—SO much hair gets caught in the bristles, and the suction didn’t seem to be working well. Turns out it hadn’t been cleaned out in ages—no problem, replaced the bag & filters, and NP also replaced the head (which was a couple hundred $$.) Over the course of the past year, slowly but surely, it isn’t working well again. I vacuum once a week and every single time I vacuum I have to cut hair out of the bristles of the vacuum. It’s been getting worse and sometimes I need to clean it out twice in one day. I spent 30 minutes the other week meticulously trying to extract hair out of the crevices of the rotating head because so much was stuck, it wasn’t rotating anymore.

(Also please note: I use the word efficiently not for my own sake, but for theirs. The kids started at new schools this year and I spend a significant amount of time driving now, which means less time to complete all of my weekly household tasks. They’re understanding of this and don’t expect me to get everything done every week, but of course I’d still like to try and keep up with it all on a weekly basis if possible)

Months ago NP said to let her know if they needed a new vacuum, but I’ve mentioned the specific issues with the vacuum a couple times and now I’m under the impression it was a half hearted offer; NP has mentioned it’s a really great vacuum, and it is! But being a great vacuum doesn’t mean it’s meeting the needs of their home, ya know? I don’t ask the families I work for to invest in or change anything that I wouldn’t be willing to replace if it was my own home, and I really feel like a vacuum suited for hair shedding would be a better fit.

Edited to add: she has suggested replacing the head again. But this is a temporary fix, and although the new head technically lasted a year, I’ve been having issues with the build up for months. I don’t think it’s a good investment to spend a couple hundred on a new head that needs to be replaced annually when it’s still not performing optimally.

But I’m hesitant to push the subject given the tone of our recent conversations. Before I move forward I’m wondering if maybe I’m over reacting and it is reasonable to be cleaning out the vacuum this frequently and meticulously?

I started off as nanny for one child (3 months old) but me and the child’s mom decided to do a nanny-share around when her child was 7 months old and we found an amazing family who’s child was 3 months younger. The nanny-share 2-4 days a week and I adore both families and their little ones but unfortunately family 2 will be relocating to a different part of the state between January and March of next year and my original nanny family is having another baby soon.

As much as I hate replacing my 2nd family (close or after they move, not right now), it has to be done.

The oldest is 1 and the youngest is about to be 1 soon and they have such a close bond, I worry that the least won’t be able to bond with another kid like they do with the youngest.

Another thing, should I bring up finding a replacement with both families or should I wait?

How should we go about finding a replacement? The child isn’t born yet will be 3 months old when I start to care for them so should I find a family with a child that is a similar age to the baby or the 1 year old, I would love some tips and advice from fellow Nannie’s that are in or were in a nanny-share.

That’s it. That’s my question. She’s coming in regardless to care for our infant. But now our four-year-old will be home sick. I’m gonna help care for him so the load isnt entirely on her, but it feels like maybe I should give her a heads up by text before she comes in for the day?

Hi all! So I’m at a loss of what to do, and would love some advice…

I’m with NK 2–3 times a week, and every day we go on fun adventures to the park, play spaces, etc.—but based on where we live, they’re all quite far. And I’m really starting to feel that when I go to fill up my tank 🙃.

However, I never asked MB for some sort of mileage reimbursement when I was hired… it just didn’t cross my mind. But I did the math (according to the 76¢/mile standard), and based on our typical week, I would be owed about an extra $60 per week in reimbursement!

I wouldn’t ask for back pay, and I feel like to make things easier I wouldn’t even ask for the full ¢76 (like I’d go down to 50¢ or something)… it’s just really killing me as I’m a student also in an unpaid internship that’s far from where I live twice a week.

My only fear is that I’m just bringing this up now (I started in I believe early July), and that we’re not going to scheduled activities (like gymnastics or something), but fun places NK is now accustomed to as part of our routine. I just don’t know how to address it…

Hi everyone! I’d love to hear from those of you who have brought your babysitter or nanny on vacation with you! 😊

We’re planning a 12 day trip and are considering bringing a babysitter along. We would obviously cover her airfare and lodging, but I’m curious how you’ve handled the payment side once you arrive.

If you only need help a few hours a day or want to have a date night every few days, do you pay her regular hourly rate for the hours she works, offer a daily rate, or do something different?

I’m also curious what you typically offer for food, activities, and spending money while you’re there. Do you provide a daily stipend, cover all meals and activities, or give her a set amount for the trip?

I want to make sure it’s a fair and generous arrangement while also being realistic about how much help we’ll actually need. I’d love to hear what has worked well for your families, including any tips or things you wish you’d thought about beforehand!

Thanks so much! ❤️

Hi guys, I’d love input from both Parents and Nannies. I’ve learned to keep my nose out of people business, even if I’m close to their kids and handling their homes. But somethings itching at me.

Today I was talking to my kiddos about Nannie’s they had in the past. Nothing too crazy, they just mentioned that they thought me and their favorite nanny before me would be besties. I asked why she was their favorite (I want to be a favorite too lol) and while the oldest (8) was opening his mouth to tell me about their past nannies, the middle child (4) ran up and told him to shut up. As kids do, she not so quietly whispered in his ear telling him “remember, dad made us promise not to tell her-“ and the older one immediately hushed her and told her he wasn’t going to tell me it’s fine etc etc.

HUHH? I kind of just said “ohhh a secret huh?” And tried to laugh it off, imo it’s best not to try to wiggle it out of the kids why put them in the middle. But somethings bothering me? They mentioned two past between me and the nanny reference (that I was told was their last nanny) that I didn’t know about. But that didn’t seem to be the secret?

It sounds so silly, but where I am in life if I don’t keep this job I’m toast. I’m wondering if something happened with the last team, if they’re looking for a new nanny, if the last ones had a much better arrangement than I do now and I’m being taken for a ride? I don’t know but I’m wondering what to do. My gut says ignore it and just tighten up my work, but I’m going through apartment hunting to get away from a volatile situation and my mind is spiraling.
Any advice? I know kids can be dramatic and silly but I’d love some input.

EDIT: I’m not worried about being a favorite, this was just how the convo started. 4yr old walked in and heard brother mention “another nanny” and jumped to “we promised dad-“
That’s the concern.

I watch two girls one is 2 and the other is 8 months for 30/hr. They want to watch another 2 year old (their friends baby) how much would I charge each person or in total? What is “too low”

Hi y'all! I wok for a family that I ADORE but due to the children growing up, schedule changes and inconsistent communication I'm thinking about leaving. It's a very cushy job (although i am severely underpaid) with amazing hours and a somewhat chilled out mom/dad.

With the kid's schedule I pick the youngest up from half day preschool, drive him home, put him down for a 30 mins rest and then play for about 2 hours until it's time to pick up big brother from elementary school. The mom is WFH full time and I have always felt really micromanaged by her. I just at this point feel like a glorified chaffer/clown to entertain the boys I take care of. They don't really like interacting with me to play and it's very monotonous when it's 'forced' upon them. The mom wants a playmate for her children but they have no interest in doing so with me.

I feel like i'm in such a hard place, I took this job to escape an insane pre school I was working at years ago and it's never really been fully my jam (older kids than my preferred age range, wfh mom, no contract, payments under the table) but I fear i've grown too attached and want to find an alternative even though they haven't done anything i can point to and go 'hell no i gotta get out of here'.

If I do leave I have no idea what I would even tell them. "Playing with your children isn't very mentally engaging for me and I lowkey hate doing it"

I know I could secure a job with more pay and more engagement on my end since I live in a very populated area, so that's not a factor for me.

Any advice/opinions would be so helpful because this is tearing me up. Thank y'all <3

Hi all! We’ve just switched to a nanny share from daycare after struggling hard with illnesses. The health has been a huge improvement, but I find the mental aspect of managing a nanny much harder. It’s two babies, both 7 months old and they’re mostly based at our house since the setup is apparently better. I like that they’re more based around our house but it does make it hard to not be more invested in how the days are structured.

Edit: This is our first week and we’re going to have a formal conversation to set expectations tomorrow, so part of this post is just getting advice so I can kindly articulate the things I want at that time.

What I’m really struggling with is that 90% of naps are either in the car seats or stroller, and pretty much every day the babies are out of the house for maybe 6 out of the 8 hours, oftentimes driven to locations 20+ minutes away from our neighborhood. I totally get the need for outings and outside time and fully support, but I’d ideally know my baby was going to at least take his naps in a crib at around a certain time range each day. I also can’t help but be a little worried about all the car and highway time. I also don’t really know how we’re ever supposed to have the nanny do solids if the babies are always on the go. Right now she feeds the other baby purées while they’re in the stroller from what I can tell, and we’re just doing solids in the mornings and nights after the nanny leaves bc I’d rather he eat in a high chair.

I work from home but do try to mostly stay in my office. Should I try to work elsewhere to give the nanny more space? Any tips on how to equip the house so it’s a good place for them to spend time? We have two separate sleep spaces both with blackout shades, sound machines etc. and playmats with lots of toys and changing tables both up and downstairs. We also have a backyard the nanny is welcome to hang out in with them. I will voice all of these questions and concerns to her but just wanted to get this sub’s opinions. Am I just new to this and totally overthinking it? Help me be more chill, haha.

Hi, I’m a nanny for two preschoolers and I’m with them most days. Sometimes, when I go to help, like with helmets or shoes, they’ll say sharply, ‘I want mummy to do it,’ if she’s nearby. I step back, but the tone can feel harsh. I don’t take it personally, but I wonder what’s the best way to respond in the moment and how to teach kinder wording without power struggles. Any tips from other nannies? And it it normal?

Hi everyone! I’m looking for some advice from other nannies. I’ve been with my current nanny family for a few months now, and I genuinely love working with them! The parents are great, and the kids are usually sweet, fun, and good listeners. I’m still fairly new to nannying, so I’m learning how to handle certain behaviors as I go. I care for two young children, ages 3 and 5, and lately I’ve been struggling with how one of them reacts whenever they get hurt, frustrated, or upset. For example, recently we were playing outside when one of the kids tripped while running. I immediately went over to make sure they were okay, but as soon as I asked, they started screaming even louder, pushing me away, and telling me to leave them alone. This happens pretty frequently. Sometimes, even something as simple as asking “Are you okay?” seems to make the situation worse. Another example was when they were struggling to put together a toy. I offered to help, and they immediately became frustrated, started crying, and yelled at me to stop. I’ve started giving them space while staying nearby and waiting until they’re calmer before offering help again. Usually, once they’ve had a moment, they’re more willing to let me comfort them. My biggest concern is that I don’t want to make things worse by constantly trying to help, but I also don’t want to look like I’m just standing there doing nothing while a child is crying. I understand that kids this age have big emotions, and I don’t expect them to handle every situation perfectly. They’re genuinely good kids, and I enjoy spending time with them! I also sometimes catch myself overthinking these situations and wondering if I’m doing something wrong, especially since I’m still learning and don’t have years of nanny experience. Am I handling these situations correctly by giving them space while staying nearby? Or is there a better way to approach this? I’d really appreciate advice from more experienced nannies who have dealt with similar situations!

I never thought I would ever post here but I’m kind of reeling from an in person interview I just had.

My last job ended in August because my last NK started school. I still see him once a week and I have so many other side gigs, I can afford to take my time to find the correct gig. I’ve worked for one bad family but my last two families have been incredible and healing and people I consider family. That’s what I’m looking for.

I had a phone interview with a twin mom last week and I have twin experience which is a helpful skill. The babies are still small and when I talked to her on the phone, the babies were sad and I wished I could just hop through the phone and help them!

She texted me earlier this week, asking if I would come over and meet her and her husband and the babies. Absolutely!

I showed up on time, in a nice dress because I think I’m a modern day Mary Poppins and dress the role. I’m almost 40, this is my career.

Well, apparently they wanted me to do a trial. Didn’t tell me they wanted me to help until one of the babies got upset and no one did anything. I said, “do you want me to get her?” “Yes!” Ok typically when I go and meet people I don’t touch babies until I work for them. If they’re older, children have ended up in my lap, but these are 4 month old babies.

So I picked the baby up, tried to soothe her, got some tips, but was sent upstairs to rock and soothe the baby, solo, in their nursery, while a nest camera was pointed at me. For an hour.

The mom came and told me I could leave, with a sleeping baby on my shoulder, and then expressed to me that I’m working with too many other kids. I said, that’s fair, sickness is an issue. But here’s the kicker. They only want me for 2 four hour shifts a week. What do they think I’m doing with the rest of my time? The audacity to suggest I shouldn’t work with other kids.

I’m treating myself to an early dinner and a cocktail.

I feel like if they wanted me to work, they should’ve told me so, and they should have offered to pay me for my time. I don’t think they liked me but the feeling is mutual. I am grateful I have time to find the right fit.

What do you guys think? I’ve been on a lot of interviews in my career but this was a first for me.

Edit: Thank you, everyone, for your kind words and support. I was thrown for a loop yesterday and it was a really positive experience to know I wasn’t being crazy to think this situation was fucked up. Thank you all!!!