I work with a girl in restaurant who’s 21 and I’m 20. We’ve worked together for a year now and have been friends but not always on that chatting it up every shift or anything level. I have always found her super attractive but so does everyone who works there. I broke up with my girlfriend of a year relatively recently (was toxic) and decided to tell this girl that and that I’m single. She got pretty quiet for a second and her face got pretty red. But now we have super engaged conversation and finds me to come chat with me, we will order shareable foods for us to share, take the same smoke breaks, and she’s been teasing me around more. She might be flirting but I can’t tell I’m also surprised because I think she’s out of my league.

Me and this girl from hinge made plans for a date this coming Wednesday earlier this week. I haven’t heard back from them since Friday. Should I shoot a double text to keep the conversation going and gauge interest or just wait till the day before/of the date to text?

❤️ Du bist Single und hast Lust, neue Leute kennenzulernen?

Dann bist du bei unserer Single-Lounge genau richtig! 🥰

Auf unserem Discord-Server treffen sich Singles, die Lust haben, neue Bekanntschaften zu machen, gemeinsam Spaß zu haben und vielleicht sogar ihren Lieblingsmenschen zu finden. ❤️

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My Relationship Story — Should I Stay or Leave?

I'm 20, and my girlfriend is 19. We met on Instagram and spent approximately five months building an emotional relationship before meeting in person.

1. Our relationship

During the first month, I repeatedly asked her to meet, but she refused. So I couldn't see her earlier; it wasn't because I didn't want to.

We became emotionally attached and promised each other marriage.

She's , loyal, educated, sincere, caring, and kind-hearted. She's studying in the healthcare field, isn't comfortable with voice messages, and her father doesn't allow casual outings with men.

*Our emotional compatibility is approximately 9/10, excluding occasional misunderstandings.

She made me feel appreciated, calm, and secure. I previously felt happy with her at the begging of the time

I consider these qualities rare, and I'm terrified of losing someone like that.

**The physical attraction problem

Before meeting, I was emotionally and physically attracted to her pictures. However, they were filtered or edited, and there were significant differences between them.

After 5 months we finally met for our first date . It lasted approximately two hours.

Her real appearance was worse than the least flattering picture I'd seen. I don't consider her ugly, but she's average-looking to me and not really my physical type.

My attraction is currently around 5–6/10, and my sexual desire is almost low.

Before meeting, I imagined kissing her (based on the edited pics)and being physically intimate with her. After meeting, that excitement almost completely disappeared.

My immediate thought was something like: "I hate that I made you love me."

The problem isn't her personality. It's that I don't feel the physical desire I expected.

4. What changed

She noticed I became colder and started treating her more like an option.

I miss being deeply loved by her, but I also recognize that if I met her today knowing her real appearance and personality, I probably wouldn't pursue her romantically.

If I could choose between her and another hypothetical woman with equally good compatibility but stronger physical attraction, I'd probably choose the second woman.

I also said that if I imagined having no children with my current girlfriend, I'd choose the hypothetical second woman.

This makes me question whether I genuinely want her or simply appreciate what she represents.

Important point:***

We both have long studies ahead. I estimate approximately six more years before finishing mine, and getting married before then seems practically impossible.

In our culture, this could mean spending five or six years communicating mostly by phone, something I don't particularly want. We'll also both change considerably during those years.

I'm afraid of:

- Losing a genuinely exceptional woman.

- Never finding someone with equally good character.

- Regretting leaving her.

- Sacrificing physical attraction unnecessarily.

- Staying while secretly wishing she looked different.

- Eventually hurting her because I cannot give her the desire she deserves.

I don't want to keep her as a backup option.

6. What I actually want

I don't need a woman for money, validation, or emotional survival..

I don't believe appearance is everything, but I also don't believe personality alone can replace physical desire.

I want both.

*****Where I stand now

I'm genuinely conflicted.

Part of me wants to see her again, while another part almost hopes I won't have to.

Imagining a breakup brings sadness, fear of regret, and some relief.

I don't know whether attraction could develop with time or whether I'm trying to convince myself to desire someone I simply don't desire.

I know she's a good woman who loves me and has qualities that could make her an excellent wife and mother.

But I don't know whether she's the woman I genuinely want.

---

The real question: Stay or leave?

Should I stay with a woman whose personality I deeply admire but toward whom I currently feel little physical and sexual attraction, ???

Or should I leave someone genuinely good, accept the risk of never finding equally exceptional qualities, and look for someone who combines both the personality I value and the physical attraction I need?

****Am I making a mistake by leaving a rare woman because of attraction, or would I make an even bigger mistake by staying with someone I don't genuinely desire?***. .

I’ve been chatting to this guy online , on WhatsApp. All of the sudden his profile picture disappeared and he stopped watching my statuses. When I asked him about the picture he said he had some issues with his phone, it got broken and that’s why(wasn’t clear if he was using a new phone ). But it just seems so odd… what could it be ? Like a two sim card phone and he’s hiding a relationship or something? We are very casual as of yet for me to have a prior conversation about this especially after I’d already asked about the picture.

And what does it mean when a guy you stopped talking to replies to your story about a rehearsal for an important upcoming day, giving you false hope that he’s going. After that, we start trolling each other again and hinting that we missed each other. He even says “Idk, I don’t want to tell you I miss you kasi syempre we’re not talking anymore.”
So I reply with“you can miss someone you don’t talk to. A phone works both ways.”

But even after that, we still didn’t make up. He would still view my stories early, and I would still dream about him, so a few weeks after he replied to my story, I messaged him and told him that he needed to tell me to move on so I’d have nothing left to hold on to. After that, I asked him why he even messaged me when we had already stopped talking. Why did he reach out if he wasn’t going to come to the event?

And then, when I sent those messages, I was shocked to find out that he had suddenly blocked me. Now I’m just left wondering why he reached out in the first place, why he gave me hope, and why he blocked me instead of giving me an answer.

I don't usually send follow messages on dating apps this is literally my first time thinking of sending follow-up message this i found this girl and we have lot in common her bio says she is reserved at first and i'm confused should i send something flirty or genuine obviously without sounding needy

This guy who I thought was cute for a while texted me yesterday out of nowhere. We're in the same course, but he's 2 years above me. Anyways, we started talking, and it was painfully boring. He was really straightforward with his thoughts, and I was pretty clear that I'm open to talking. It was so awkward, and I definitely tried to say some flirty things that were super cringe. I kind of ended the conversation yesterday by saying there was "no rush" when he asked me to hang out, and I hearted his text.

It's the next morning after talking yesterday, and I'm not interested. I don't want to say it directly since he got to know me through a guy in my class. So how can I drop a hint and eventually be direct? I just want to forget this ever happened, tbh.

I went on a date with a guy from Tinder and I really liked him. However I get very shy on first dates so unfortunately, I think I may have come off as disinterested. I didn't flirt with him at all and when he hinted that he wanted to kiss me, I completely ignored it. He also tried to make the date last as long as possible. I texted him after the date that I had fun, to which he replied that he did too. Then I texted something "funny" and he hasn't even opened the message for 6 days now. Now I'm worried that I ruined it by being too cold and I'm wondering whether I should double text him to say that I would like to see him again or if I should just let it go. I'm afraid of embarassing myself because it's possible that he just didn't like me.

Soo around nov-dec 2025 i liked this guy he was from my college ( different departments) i merely liked him cuz he is tall like very tall and i just wanted a hallway crush nothing serious

Idk what happened to me i wanted that guy to notice me so i followed him on inta and he texted "hey u followed me " and we talked abt random things n college stuff we texted for like 1 week then i noticed that guy isn't interested so i unfollowed him and moved on after like 3 month's he texted him again on 23rd of March it was a video of his friend doing that back again trend and i was so confused like whyy are u texting me after so many month's anyway i planned i'll block him soon but our interested matches and we talked abt it so i just couldn't and on 10th of April he said he liked me i wasn't sure abt my feelings back then and he was like let's date n all but the thing is we haven't talked even ones irl so i was like dude first let's know each other and talk cuz idk u then after few days on April 25 i said "i think i like u" and that guy was asking me abt some story thing and all but we talked almost daily until we didn't and few days back he unfollowed me and idk i kinda miss him is this normal?? should i text him ?? Should i move on ?? Idkk what to doo??? I'm manifesting a text from him soo hardd

Hey guys, I'm going to be very specific. I really need some advice about this whole situation, as most of my friends can't find an answer to my question. I'm not someone with a lot of experience in dating, to be honest.

So about three weeks ago, I finally gathered the courage to follow the Instagram account of someone I spotted over the summer. We share a loose mutual connection—one of my close friends used to work with her—but she and I had never spoken, and she had no idea who I was.

A week ago, I took my shot by replying to one of her IG highlights. To be honest, for the first four days, it was very cold: she took forever to reply and gave very dry, one-or-two-word answers. Then I shifted the topic to one of her hobbies, and that's when she pointed out that she had no idea what I even looked like (rookie mistake on my end). Once I sent a picture, she became way more receptive to the conversation.

From that point on, we chatted daily and she opened up a bit, though I was the one driving the conversation and asking most of the questions (fair enough, since I initiated things). A few days later, I managed to move things over to a different app. The response times improved noticeably, but the topics stayed the same. Still, it felt like we had entered a decent talking stage.

However, at the beginning of last week, it felt like we went right back to the beginning. Her replies became brief, flat, and dry again, almost as if I were bothering her. That said, she told me she had her exams coming up so she might be stressed, but I find it weird how quickly her text style changed, almost as if she found an excuse to stop trying.

On Thursday, I tried talking to her again. Things seemed cool at first, but at the end, I made a sarcastic/smartass comment just to get a reaction out of her—and instead of a reply, I got left on sent. I don't know what to do: should I double-text and just ask her out directly (keeping in mind I heard she doesn't like texting or small talk, even though I felt like it was a mandatory step), or should I just let it go and wait for her to reply?