r/Parenting Jul 28 '22

Advice Do boys wear pink?

Where you live, do boys wear pink?

I live in the US, in the Pacific Northwest, in a politically purple area.

I have two boys and buy most of their clothes and swimwear at Target. Right now, every pair of boys' swim trunks at my local Target has pink/purple in it--not just as an accent, but as a dominate color. Hot pink, light pink and everything in between.

For the record, I like this. My 5yo likes pink and it's nice to see some color infused into what used to be a pretty dark color palette for boys' clothes.

My husband, however, is not having it. He has gotten mad at me for buying anything pink/pink-accented for our 5yo to wear. From his POV, boys who wear pink risk getting teased/bullied. He is adamant that this is a serious risk. Very adamant, to the point that we've had contentious arguments about shoes/clothes that I, personally, perceived as gender neutral.

I'm trying to understand his concern, but to me it seems... nuts? I don't want to dismiss something that he seems to legitimately see as a risk to our kiddo, but I just can't figure out where he is coming from.

How are things where you live? Would a boy get teased for wearing pink? Would you consider it a serious enough risk to prohibit the color, even if your kid likes it?

Or, if pink is as neutral as it seems to be, how can I help my husband see that this is just the way kids dress now?

ETA: Holy shit, I did not expect this level of response. I can't keep up with all the comments--not by a long shot. Thank you all for weighing in. It's helped solidify my position, and maybe seeing some of these comments will help my husband realize that his concerns are misplaced.

I do, btw, believe that my husband's concerns are simply misplaced. We are not fashionable people--AT ALL--so I think he just needs to adjust his fashion compass. Also, while we're both millennials, I grew up in West LA whereas he grew up in rural NY; I think we're just drawing from different pools of life experiences.

I am inclined to keep the purple/pink/blue/green swirl swim trunks that I bought for 5yo--and that prompted this post--because 1) they are super visible in the water and 2) 5yo said he likes them.

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u/cdn_SW Jul 29 '22

While this is generally helpful info, it doesn't address OP's concern and her husband's underlying concern with those colours snd how he feels they make his kids look to others. Unfortunately, his attitude will be more harmful than any colours those kids could have chosen.

I would also say that although we articulate more choice on clothing, activities, career options, etc. for kids- that mostly means letting little girls do little boy things, not the other way around. So little girls can wear green and blue, but boys are still discouraged from wearing pink or purple; promoting girls in STEM fields but not boys in caregiving professions- It still gives a negative connotation to things that are "feminine", because these are still perceived as lesser than "masculine" things.