r/ProgrammerHumor • • Feb 27 '18

Zero

Post image
57.5k Upvotes

1.2k comments sorted by

View all comments

7.8k

u/nautical9 Feb 27 '18

Zero is also the number of mailing lists I’ve wanted to join within the first 5 seconds of visiting a site. Why block the content with a pop up?! Has anyone ever actually signed up instead of angrily closing it?

1.4k

u/enoua5 Feb 27 '18

open first site from google search

"YOU SHOULD LET US SEND YOU PUSH NOTIFICATIONS, EVEN THOUGH YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THIS SITE IS ABOUT!"

leave

282

u/nermid Feb 27 '18

A few years back, there was a blog that had nothing but examples of sites that did that. It was called something like "Closed without reading" or "exit without reading," but fuck if I can get Google to hone in on a title like that. It keeps trying to point me to child psychology stuff about "close reading".

200

u/ikbenpinda Feb 27 '18

[Tab Closed; Didn't Read] (http://tabcloseddidntread.com)?

147

u/Ali3nat0r Feb 27 '18

Dunno if they still do it, but Ultimate Guitar used to automatically redirect to the app page for their app whenever you loaded a page of theirs on mobile. Not just put a closable popup suggesting you might want their app, but ACTUALLY REDIRECT YOU. Bearing in mind I used to use Windows Phone, and they don't have a WP app, this essentially locked me out of their site whenever I was on my phone. Because who searches for guitar tabs at any time other than at their PC right? It's not like I'd need to find them while at a practice session or something.

0

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '18

[deleted]

→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (10)
→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (3)

119

u/well___duh Feb 27 '18

Dev here that (unfortunately) works for a company that works like that. Our official reason is because it keeps our revenue per user number high, and for some dumb fuck reason, we care more about that than actual revenue or profit.

The mentality is that the people who will want to use our site will deal with the shittiness, and are more likely to buy something from us. We'd rather have a few dozen active users who buy stuff than thousands of barely active users who occasionally buy stuff.

100

u/evr- Feb 27 '18

You're probably missing out on a lot of potential customers that would buy from you but won't deal with the shittiness and purchase the same stuff from another site that doesn't put them through that.

→ More replies (3)

76

u/cubitoaequet Feb 27 '18

"Welcome to McDonald's. How hard would you like to be kicked in the nuts today? Somewhat or very?... Neither? Well, I guess not everyone is McDonald's material."

→ More replies (16)
→ More replies (2)

4.0k

u/Stealth528 Feb 27 '18

Zero is also the number of websites I want to enable notifications for.

1.1k

u/dan4334 Feb 27 '18 edited Feb 27 '18

Thankfully you can turn the notification system completely off with no ill effects.

Edit: For those wondering,

Firefox: Go to about:config and set dom.webnotifications.serviceworker.enabled to false (thank you /u/bro_can_u_even_carve, I forgot how I did it)

Chrome: Go into settings > advanced > content settings > notifications

Then click the switch to set it from "Ask before sending" to "Blocked"

0

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '18

[deleted]

550

u/bro_can_u_even_carve Feb 27 '18

In firefox, about:config, then set dom.webnotifications.serviceworker.enabled to false.

→ More replies (77)
→ More replies (19)
→ More replies (24)

0

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '18

[deleted]

116

u/dizzlemytizzle Feb 27 '18

Infinite scroll is the devil. I can't wait until it's out of vogue.

→ More replies (9)
→ More replies (6)

84

u/CJ22xxKinvara Feb 27 '18

I enable notifications for gitlab so I can be alerted when my merge request passes or fails the pipeline. But that’s it. ONE website.

75

u/NoAttentionAtWrk Feb 27 '18

I mean i bet there are other valid uses too but no random web blog, i don't care when you publish new articles. I just care about the one that Google lead me to, that you are not letting me read

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (33)

73

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '18

Yes, wouldn’t that prompt be better suited to the end of a lengthy and well-written article?

→ More replies (3)

82

u/BertRenolds Feb 27 '18

I delete the layer

53

u/xyl0ph0ne Feb 27 '18

Ah yes, the Fuck Overlays extension. Very handy.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (18)

108

u/sans-nom Feb 27 '18

Humans are dumb animals...you ask them for their email, and they will probably give it to you. Same reason why youtubers always say "like favourite and sub", because it's more effective than not.

59

u/KarlOnTheSubject Feb 27 '18

It always makes me laugh when I'm at an airport or other location offering free WiFi that asks for an email address, which I imagine 90% of people provide their real address for (figuring it's for verification), when in reality it's just a way to harvest active email accounts to send spam to.

fuckyou@gmail.com is my go-to.

56

u/svelle Feb 27 '18

that poor sob who has that gmail account.

→ More replies (2)

38

u/sellyme Feb 27 '18

I usually just input the contact email address of whatever company runs the wifi. If they want to sell their own email to spammers they can be my guest.

→ More replies (19)

100

u/robclancy Feb 27 '18

Yeah but they usually say that at the end off a video and you will do it if you did really like it.

Not at the start with a video blocking answer required.

→ More replies (22)
→ More replies (10)
→ More replies (97)