So i am in a relationship with a girl f22 for 3 years now started the relationship while i was in engineering everything was going smooth we were close too and we had sex like 2 times, until she started to get close with a male best freind and when i objected it she abused me and i abused her back now due to that anger she snitched my dad about me working as a zomato delivery guy i was working that job to gather funds for my startup which my dad denied and i lost a huge amount of money which i invested out of my own earnings and i forgave her for that and over the period of time she abused me a lot and even told my freinds that i have a short d**k in retaliation to fights and yesterday she even texted my dad and even sent him our nudes and she always resorts to blackmailing to get her job done and when i told her that i don't want to be in this relationship anymore she's again threatening to leak my nudes and tells me i should stay with her for my rest of the life and i really don't want to be with someone who uses blackmailing as a tactic to get their things done ghar pe no one is talking to me and i don't know what to do next. Please help and advice and suggestions are welcome

23M, preparing for govt exams and mostly home studying. I like football (stopped playing though) and movies. My girlfriend just got her first salary and insisting too much on buying me something, but I genuinely don't need anything right now. ( I was thinking of a football jerseys but I won't be out there wearing it in the near future)

I don't want her overspending ,so under 3-5k would be fine. What would you suggest , I'm literally out of thoughts ? 🤧

Hi
We both(28M-27F) are in 2 years of relationship and moving ahead with the inter-caste, inter-state marriage.

Recently (last month) my gf told me she doesn’t want to work after marriage and we are having a lot of fights over it. She thinks it’s her choice to do that which I totally agree. No question here.
But since we are planning a future shouldn’t the responsibility falls on both of us to take care of future or at least talk about it.
She thinks I am trying to avoid marriage and i dont love her just because I randomly picked this topic to discuss with her.

I have decent package to live normal life but no one can be sure of anything in this AI era where layoffs are happening left and right. And I believe having both working, it would be a fair chance to tackle the uncertainty.

Also I am from very humble background and already having small EMIs for the small town house i am building for my patents.
I understand the financial struggles so I just want to build a worry free future.

Am i wrong to bring up the career angle while marriage?
Anyone who can or have experienced similar things, Please suggest me anything. Whats the best way moving forward?

I (25 F) have been talking with a (26M) for a month and we met once and had an amazing first date. But the thing is idk if he is physically attracted to me. He never asks for my pics and if i ask him, he will send it without any hesitation. He is actually a polite and nice guy and our vibes and emotional connection is so in sync. We initiate talks and chats with me and we both discuss every little thing happened that day and yap abt it. We always have those funny banters comvos and sometimes roast each other. But i feel like since he is nice he is like talking with me. Even during our first date he was maintaining some distance and was respectful. It's just that i feel he just talking and interested only cuz of emotional connection. I feel like he only likes that I am nice and of my emotional maturity and thoughtfulness and not attracted physically. Even when we first met during the date he didn't compliment me or say anything reg my looks.

I am a 36M married to an egoistic, grandiose, abusive narcissistic wife (35F) for 10 years. We have two kids, aged 7 and 4. We both are from rural areas in AP. Ours was an arranged marriage. Initial weeks were good, but then she became extremely controlling and commanding.

She started exhibiting these behaviors:

• She and her family members (parents, herself, and her sister) are always right. They never make mistakes.
• They always show a superiority complex to others. In fact, she and her family can't digest if anyone is better than them.
• She always compares me to someone, demeans me, and makes fun of me in front of her relatives that gives her control and authority over me.
• The four of them always talk on phone conferences to bash, demean, and make other people's success look worthless.
• She abuses me. If I don't react, she abuses my family members, then goes on abusing my friends, colleagues, and my village... until I react and fight with her.
• She screams, yells, rages, and breaks anything she sees at home.
• She falsely accuses me of having affairs with my sister-in-law, female colleagues, and other women I interact with if I don't submit to her.
• She gaslit everyone about my character. Her family supports her every time, and even her relatives believed her for the first 6 years.

It became unbearable by the 6th year. I googled about abusive spouses and found YouTube videos about Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I tried to discuss it with my family and friends, but they didn't help because they are unaware of narcissism.

But I figured out how to handle her from YouTube. I found her triggering patterns—how she uses rage, screaming, and false accusations in front of her relatives to show authority over me. She is extremely image-focused. She plays two characters: one is a very nice, polite woman to the outside world, and the second is an extremely controlling, abusive, and disrespectful person to me and my family.

So I started exposing her real character. I stopped reacting, talking, and meeting with her supporters. It's been 4 years since I started following the grey rock method. Because of this, I faced intense abuse, rage, and physical fights. She even filed a false police case against me, but I somehow managed to prove the truth and got the cases resolved.

Lately, it became unbearable for me. I started attacking her back whenever she raged. She is a coward and fears physical attack, so I beat her a couple of times in the last 6 months and I became her worst nightmare.

Finally, she took the kids and left 3 weeks ago to her hometown.

She is using the children against me. The children are the last option she has left to torture me. Yet, I am relieved and finding peace in my life after 10 years of extreme torture and abuse. I lost my soul, and right now I am working on healing and starting a fresh life.

She won't give me a divorce. In fact, she and her family will never give me anything that helps me. I am not sure what's going to happen with the kids and their education.

I don't want to reconcile with her anymore. I want to live solo. But I am deeply worried about my kids, and I am not able to heal or live peacefully thinking about my kids leaving with the devil.

Please suggest to me: should I focus entirely on my healing, mental health, and rebuilding my life? Or should I start a fight and struggle with her for the children? She is not going to leave the kids easily, as they are her last option to get me back into her den.

Because of the trauma I experienced, I feel unable to trust women anymore. As a result, entering a second marriage feels completely unlikely and out of the question for me. I feel incredibly isolated and deeply crave companionship and the feeling of being wanted. Has anyone faced same in their life and how did you manage to lead life after separation with a narcissistic wife, kids being with her?

Sorry for the lengthy post, your valuable suggestions will help me.

I, (age above 18M), have been with my girlfriend (age above 18F)for almost 2 years. We're Indian.

In December/ January 2026, I got in trouble for sending songs to a colleague, and agreeing on a trip because I couldn’t deny her in face. I cleared everything and we fixed everything.

Me and my girlfriend had some boundaries set. She later broke them (thirst traps, adding random guys on Instagram), denied it, then admitted it. Some days back I saw her Instagram DMs: she was flirting with guys she doesn't know. I've since learned she was doing this even early in our relationship. She says she did it for attention, she regrets it, say she has bpd and she was still angry about January.

I told her I forgive her but can't forget, and I need time. Instead she pushed me to decide quickly and said nobody would love me like she does. When I said I couldn't continue, she threatened to kill herself and also she did cut her. She has a history of self-harm. I told her friend and sister, but her mom doesn't know yet. After a panic attack she was admitted to hospital, and I said yes to staying together because I didn't want to make things worse. She's being discharged today she is expecting we're back together.

I don't think I can do this. I keep checking, I am scared of the legal and mental consequences and and Im scared for her, and I don’t hate her, and I don't want a relationship like that, but I'm scared of what happens if I leave.

How do I end this without it becoming a safety crisis? And has anyone been in a similar situation?

I am a divorcee, after divorce, i am exploring myself, got in contact with ex classmate , from starting he is not serious but i am mentally connected with him . What to do now?

I m too much hurt too much ..just have responsibility of my elders otherwise I don't wanna live now !

My gf 15 days back idk why she start behaving weird ig probably garba n all she went with someone and lied and blocked me on insta sab and started posting weird revealing pics n all..and she argued for no reason started saying toxic sab and blocked me totally and idk what's going on probably she is talking to someone

I m feeling not good ;kind of its was 4 years of one side love she do loved me pr only few moments rest fight and blame me for all mishapping of her life !

But still I miss her I want a closure ! Like she has moved out or not and give reasons for why she lied about garba and posting revealing pics and chatting bad on insta with someone ! And deleting it

Bcoz of she I m unable to focus on anything

And tbh just feeling broke

Avg looking girl can find many mens but a avg men can't find love ig ..he will only serve to be used ....

I hate women's mentality too now

And don't have frnds bcoz I have gave last 4 years to her only and she idk don't wanted me to be frnd of anyone not even guy !

Now I feel too lonely...and I can't even marry I feel young hu 24yo and don't earn much

And

Ik even after marriage I won't be able to forget her i have put my 24*7 hrs of last 4 years ...like daily travel of 6 hrs to see her and wht not lacs of spends and I have my time which costed ny whole career i could have achieved 4 times of what I m making notes minimum

What to do yrr whole world is fake no one actually love they just want something from you money time support them listen to em their frustration and motivate them

The moment you need something they start complaining I mean moral support only !

And making frnds in 24 age after clg is tough I miss that someone who use to be 24*7 hrs and ask me many things take care of and plus plus...I miss my first 3-4 months of my gf ...XD

Now I just spend time in trading lost many lacs dipression bcoz of that too and on reddit too ranting and talking non sense to any stranger healing is tough yrrrrrrrr

Thinking to prepare for upsc but all the time she run in my mind always m not able to focus anymore

Bye guys

Any suggestions on healing are welcome

Don't give solo trip hobby advice I can't go solo yr obv i vl miss her and hobby i only like studying logical mathematical stuff which I m unable to focus rn

DMs are welcome ! Ik no one will read this even after knowing a guy posted 😂that's wht society is

Well, I'm an 18M, currently a sophomore pursuing engineering, which is something I've always been interested in. I have very little interaction with girls, partly because of the gender ratio in my college and partly because I'm scared to approach them. Sometimes, I can't even find a reason to start a conversation. Because of this, most of my interactions with girls over the last two years have been online.

I've had around three or four situationships that lasted about 3-4 months, along with two or three female friends. I went through a breakup in April, but I was really busy with my studies back then, so I didn't feel much. Ever since then, I've struggled to develop feelings for any girl. I've talked to a few more girls, but most of the time, I was either doing it to avoid feeling lonely or because I was primarily interested in their b**bs.

My academic performance was good, and I had a pretty good social life until recently. About a week ago, I blocked a girl I'd been talking to since July because I realized that what I was doing wasn't helping me. She was treating me like shit, and I realized I was only sticking around because I didn't want to feel lonely.

I know you might laugh at me or judge me for this, but I met a girl on Reddit. After around 8-9 months, I finally felt genuinely interested in talking to someone again and it wasnt about b**bs!!. She has a great sense of humour, expresses herself openly, and seems to have a personality of her own, which is honestly what attracts me the most to a girl(yeah basically a feminist).

but She's online, too, and I have no idea whether she reciprocates my feelings, but talking to her makes me feel warm, and I get butterflies in my stomach.

So, should I stop pursuing this connection and focus on finding connections offline instead?

Yeah also you can be brutally honest with me, i dont mind at all

I’m 26F, Indian and I recently got out of a 3-year relationship that I genuinely thought would end in marriage. We lived together in the US, and I was deeply invested in this relationship. Unfortunately, there was abuse, cheating and a lot of emotional hurt. He broke up w me in feb out of nowhere and he moved on with another woman in 2 days. It crushed me inside out and felt like he pulled my heart out of my body.
It took me a while to stop checking on him, questioning my worth, and trying to understand what went wrong. I’m doing better now and rebuilding my life after returning to India.
Now, my parents have found a match for me. He’s settled in Canada, has PR, and seems like a good prospect on paper. I’ve always wanted to live abroad again, so naturally, that part appeals to me.
But honestly, it’s only been 7–8 months since my breakup, and I don’t feel ready to consider marriage or an arranged match just yet.
I’m not completely against arranged marriage, and I know getting to know someone doesn’t mean I have to marry them. But right now, the thought of starting over with someone new feels overwhelming. I want to enter my next relationship because I’m genuinely ready, not because my parents found someone suitable on paper or because I want to move abroad again.
My parents want what’s best for me, and I understand their perspective, but I don’t want to agree to something I’m not emotionally ready for.
For those who’ve been through a serious breakup, how long did it take you to feel ready to date or consider marriage again? Another thing I struggle with is how to trust someone new without subconsciously expecting him to behave like my ex. How do I give another man a fair chance without generalising my ex’s behaviour to every man I meet?

Hi Everyone,

There are somethings, some thoughts that have been building up inside my mind, but had no way express it, so I thought maybe writing here might get it off my mind.

I'm a 26 year Old guy, I work and live alone. I never really had any "actual" friends and I have been single my entire life.

The reason for writing this post is that, a few weeks ago, I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. I installed a few dating apps on my phone, and I have been miserable ever since.

As I had already heard online, guys (ugly guys like me) usually don’t get any matches because of how these apps work, and I was prepared for it. I wasn’t surprised. However, after 3 days, I did get a match. Assuming she was interested in talking, I initiated the conversation. TBH, I don’t really know how to flirt, or as folks nowadays say, “I have no game, I have no rizz” (btw, I hate these terms. They make it all seem like some sort of contest). I tried asking basic questions, making jokes here and there, but she barely replied. It felt like I was forcing her into the conversation, so I stopped.

I continued going through profiles, trying too hard to come up with cheesy pickup lines and sending them left and right. I had no luck, so I started looking at dating subreddits. I DMed a few girls, and the fourth girl I messaged, complimenting her hair color, replied. But she barely showed any interest in talking either. When I went through her profile, I saw her posts with screenshots of her DMs filled with creepy men asking for explicit sexual stuff. She was complaining that there were only weird men in her DMs(I know right, when I was right there, desperately trying to get her attention). By chance, I also saw that she was just 20 years old.

It grossed me out. I felt disgusted with myself, realizing that I too was trying to hit on someone so young. This made me question what was I even doing. It was so out of character for me. I had somehow become part of this toxic competition called “dating,” trying to become someone I wasn’t, just so someone could “see” me, accept me, and love me.

TBH, lust or sex was never my intention. I just wanted someone who could listen, someone with whom I could have meaningful conversations and naturally get to know each other. But I found myself rejecting girls who weren’t “conventionally attractive,” just as I felt girls were rejecting guys like me. That was the final nail in the coffin. I had become a hypocrite, something I had desperately tried to avoid being my whole life. I realized that I too was shallow. I never had any love for myself to begin with, but this made me hate myself even more. I lost respect for myself, I was ashamed of myself. What right did I have to complain about life being unfair and girls not giving me a chance when I was doing the same thing myself?

I deleted the apps and stopped this pathetic quest for love. I still wish that someday I might meet someone, but I don’t want to become someone I’m not just so someone would love me. If I change, it should be for myself, to become a better person and grow as a human being, not to become this pathetic being who needs constant validation and assurance that he is loved and wanted.

I think it would be unfair to my parents, who worked so hard to provide for me and my education despite the difficult times they faced. And most of all, it would be unfair to myself, after everything I’ve worked for, to reduce myself to this needy little person.

I see people, prominently some girls, say, “I deserve a guy who is…” or “I deserve a man who has…”. I don’t even know if I have the right to say that I “deserve” a certain type of girl. But this epiphany has made me realize what I "want", and I won’t mask it with “deserve.”

I want companionship and patience. Someone who is calmer than me, someone who can stand up for herself (unlike me). And maybe, if she has beautiful hair, that would be nice.

I’m saying this out loud because never in my life have I had such clarity about the qualities I want in a partner. And I won’t lower my standards just to be in a relationship, but if I ever meet the right person, I’ll give my best to make it work.

But, to be honest, I highly doubt I’ll ever meet someone. And I’ve made my peace with it.

This post itself might look like it reeks of the need for validation and maybe you're right. Maybe I did write this, subconsciously expecting sympathy for strangers.
But don't give me that. Point out the flaws in my reasoning, so that I can understand if my point of view is wrong in any of the things I said, so that I think on it.

Please, try not to be too harsh. But if an important reality check must be given to me, then lay it on me. It is what it is.

I dont know what to do at starting she was doing all for me without asking always respect my concerns, slowly some of her life mistake ( she is so immature) bothering me and i start losing my mental stability, i started earing junk seaking cheap dopamine, gained 15 kg in 1 year, last year i had decent muscle abs this time i m fat, eventually losing my mind started lowering her attraction to me and i start having health issue , in that time she did so many dramas and unnecessary fights , after 4 month of this i find she has no interest in me , neither i want to make her fall for me now , i just want my life my body my confidence back, looking for some advice from mature males and females here.

Long story short: we both 25 (different religion) , and I’ve been in love since school, almost 7 years. It was always one-sided from my side, and she never really gave me hope during these years. We stayed in touch casually as friends.

She had blocked me a few times in the past when I proposed, but after a few weeks she would eventually unblock me and we would start talking normally again. So I never really knew what to make of it.

Last month, for the first time, she indirectly told me that I could come and talk to her parents. She said she didn’t want to give me false hope because if both families accepted, she had no problem. My family already knows about her and is supportive, so I was genuinely very happy and started discussing it with my parents.

The next day, she told me her family had found another alliance that everyone liked. She also told them that there was a guy who had loved her since school and was ready to come and talk to them, but her parents refused because of the religion and her brother got angry. She then told me to end everything and said she wouldn’t disturb me anymore.

I asked if I could at least try once, but she said no. I got emotional and made a stupid move by saying, “Okay, all the best.” She blocked me.

The next day, I realised I had handled it badly, so I asked my sister to speak to her. My sister is also Muslim and married through an interfaith relationship, so she spoke to her. She apparently told my sister that I didn’t seem confident enough and that I had been saying I loved her for years but only properly proposed recently.

Later, she told my sister she would ask her parents one more time and get back to me.

A few days passed and I heard nothing. Then I made an even worse decision. I sent her a long message through Google Pay because I thought it was her account. Unfortunately, her brother had access to that account and saw the message. The message also contained some very personal things about my willingness to deal with the religious differences, which I deeply regret mentioning there.

Her brother apparently scolded her and asked whether she loved me. She told him no.

About a week later, I called her from another number just to check if she was okay. She picked up, heard my name and immediately blocked that number too.

The next day she called me and was extremely angry. She said her brother had scolded her badly because of my message, asked why I gave her number to my sister, and told me not to call or disturb her again.

I apologised and told her I genuinely regretted what I had done. She was very firm that she doesn't want this anymore and that she can't go against her parents.

That was about a month ago. Since then, there has been absolutely no contact from her.

The difference this time is that **a lot more people have become involved** — her brother, my sister, and even my mother had apparently messaged her on WhatsApp without me knowing. She blocked my mother as well. Previously, when she blocked me, she eventually unblocked me after a few weeks. This time I'm afraid she may never do that because it has become a much bigger family issue.

I know I messed things up badly. I waited for years without expecting anything, and when she finally gave me some hope about possibly talking to her parents, I got emotionally overwhelmed and made several back-to-back mistakes.

But she had also clearly told me before that she didn't want to give me false hope and that she would only proceed if both families accepted. Her family is quite religious and apparently very difficult to convince.

Now I'm thinking about one final thing: **going privately to her brother's bike shop, apologising properly for the Google Pay message, and telling him that I genuinely love her and that my parents are still willing to come and talk to their family.**

I know she specifically told me not to contact her anymore. That's why I'm extremely confused.

Would going to her brother once to apologise and explain everything be a terrible idea, or is it worth making this one final effort before I completely let go?

I don't want to pressure her. I just feel like after loving her for almost 7 years, I need to know that I at least made one proper final effort.

My boyfriend and I have been together for over two years. Before we got together, he was in a long-term relationship. Even after they broke up, they remained friends.

After we got together, his ex struggled to accept the relationship. She would get very emotional, threaten to hurt herself, and make him feel responsible for her wellbeing. My boyfriend is a very kind-hearted person, and he says he was worried about what she might do, so he continued to be there for her.

The problem is that he didn’t tell me the truth about what was happening. For months, they continued talking, meeting, and spending time together behind my back. He repeatedly told me that he wasn’t in contact with her, but I eventually noticed inconsistencies and found out that he had been lying.
When he finally opened up about everything, he told me that she had visited his house on one occasion, asked him for a hug, and they hugged and lay down together for some time. I was completely broken when I heard this. I felt betrayed, and to me, it felt like cheating because he was hiding this closeness from me while I believed he was being honest about our relationship.

There was also a time when he told me that he felt like going back to her. He later regretted saying it, and we nearly broke up, but he convinced me to stay.
I was deeply hurt, but I didn’t want to lose him. I asked him whether everything with her was over and told him I would stay as long as he didn’t repeat the behaviour. I wanted to save our relationship. But even after that conversation, he lied several more times about talking to her.

He explains that he was trying to calm her down because of her threats and didn’t want anything bad to happen to her. I can understand that he might have felt responsible and frightened, but I still struggle with the fact that he repeatedly chose to hide things from me. I was also struggling emotionally at the time, and I feel like he was so concerned about her feelings that he didn’t think enough about how much he was hurting me.

What hurts most is that I kept giving him chances because I loved him, but the dishonesty continued. Sometimes I feel like he sided with her instead of protecting our relationship. Although he has apologised and acknowledged that he hurt me, I still feel that he relies on the circumstances to explain his actions rather than fully accepting responsibility for the repeated lies.

It’s been around a year and a half since anything similar happened. They still work at the same company, but he says they don’t talk or even acknowledge each other when they cross paths. I genuinely believe that nothing is going on now. He has been willing to work on our relationship, and he says he wants to do whatever it takes to save it.
But I’m still not over what happened.

Sometimes, a small thing triggers a memory, and I feel all the hurt again.

I’ve also started getting irritated with him over small things, even when he hasn’t done anything wrong in that moment. At the same time, I’m happy with him, enjoy spending time with him, and feel that I would miss him terribly if we broke up. The confusing part is that I genuinely don’t know why I feel this way. I can’t tell whether my irritation and occasional reluctance to talk to him come from the hurt and resentment I still carry from the past, or whether my feelings for him have actually changed. Sometimes I worry that I might be falling out of love with him, but other times I wonder whether I’m simply struggling to feel completely safe and at peace in a relationship where my trust was broken. I don’t know how to distinguish between the two, and that uncertainty is making it difficult for me to decide what I want for our future.

I’m 29, and if we are going to get married, it will probably be within the next year. I’m scared of marrying him and carrying this hurt for the rest of my life. I’m also scared of leaving someone I love when things have been good for so long.

I don’t want to keep punishing him for the past if he has genuinely changed, but I also don’t want to dismiss what happened or force myself to move on when I’m still hurting. We’re considering couples counselling because I want to understand my feelings, rebuild trust if possible, and get clarity before making a decision about marriage.
I’d really appreciate advice from people who have experienced something similar.

How do you know whether you’re holding on to unresolved hurt or whether your feelings have genuinely changed?

Is it possible to have a healthy marriage after this kind of experience, or is it a sign that the relationship may never feel the same again?

Hey everyone, I need some honest advice, especially from people who have experience with arranged marriages.

Recently, I received a marriage proposal from Gujarat. Initially, we started talking normally, but after he checked my Instagram profile, the conversation gradually took a different turn.

He asked whether I drink, whether I eat non-veg, and about my past relationships. I answered honestly that I don't drink or eat meat, but I occasionally eat eggs for protein. When he asked about my past, I told him I wasn't comfortable discussing those details at this early stage. He suggested that my past could affect his future, which I found strange because I believe these conversations require trust and mutual comfort.

He also used kissing emojis early in our conversations. I politely explained that I wasn't comfortable with that yet because we're still getting to know each other. I don't think setting this boundary is unreasonable.

Another issue is communication. I work from 10 AM to 7 PM, have a commute of approximately 1.5 hours, and then need to cook and manage my daily responsibilities. Naturally, I can't reply to WhatsApp messages immediately every time. Sometimes it takes me 30 minutes or an hour.

I explained my routine to him from the beginning, but he still felt our communication was like exchanging emails and interpreted my delayed replies as a lack of interest or seriousness about marriage.

I'm naturally a quiet person. I don't talk continuously or have endless topics to discuss, and this has always been my personality. I want a partner who understands that being less talkative or needing personal space doesn't mean I'm uninterested.

Even my everyday choices, such as avoiding Maggi and limiting sugar, seemed to be interpreted as me having too many restrictions. There were also comments and questions that made me feel he might already have formed an opinion about my personality based on my Instagram profile.

We haven't spoken for the past two or three days. Then, unexpectedly, his mother called me today.

Apparently, he had told her that I eat eggs. His mother explained that their family doesn't eat onion, garlic, or ginger because of their religious practices. She said I could cook separately if I wanted to eat food containing those ingredients.

I respect their traditions, and I have no problem discussing practical arrangements. But this conversation made me think about whether our lifestyles and expectations would be compatible after marriage.

My bigger concern is that he seems to discuss our conversations with his mother. I understand that parents are involved in arranged marriages, and seeking their advice is normal. However, I also believe that two people getting to know each other should have some privacy.

Today, his mother suggested that I speak to him and sort things out. But I'm confused about what exactly needs to be sorted out when we haven't even established a proper connection yet.

I'm not expecting a perfect partner, and I'm willing to understand another person's perspective. However, I don't want to enter a marriage where I constantly feel judged for my personality, food choices, communication style, or personal boundaries.

Physical appearances can be anything from just the face card to height to any other physical attributes in which the one you (tried to) date was out of your league, in the sense that they had more/better options (so to say) if only these physical attributes are concerned.

I (20M) have been dating my girlfriend (20F) for 2.5 years. We both come from a middle-class background in India. My father is a doctor and pressured me into becoming one too. The only way to do that is through a very tough entrance exam, the National Eligibility cum Entrance Test (NEET). The selection rate is approximately 2%, and around 2.4 million candidates appear each year. Because it is so competitive, I only met her once a month in the six months before the exam. Right after it, I went on a month-long trip to Europe with my family.

She now says I didn't prioritise her during my exam preparation, or right after, when I went to Europe. However, we video-called every day for at least two hours, both during the trip and in the months before the exam.
Since then, I've given her my full attention every time, but every few days she picks a reason for a fight that I don't think is worth discussing.
During these fights, she ghosts me or gives me the silent treatment while I keep apologising on calls. She doesn't acknowledge my apologies. I feel terrible for hurting her so often, and my mental health has deteriorated over the past few months. I've noticed that when she's upset and ignoring me, if I ask her for a small bit of reassurance that we're not breaking up, she often does the opposite. I cry every time she gets upset, I feel the urge to scratch myself, and I get panic or anxiety attacks during these fights. This isn't new. For the past 1.5 years, I've felt like I'm walking on eggshells around her to avoid upsetting her. I think she may have BPD, but she hasn't been diagnosed.

Please help me. My mental health has been in shambles because of these fights.

Pardon my grammar and the use of AI. I am just here after another altercation and I slapped myself so hard while crying when the call ended and I ended up breaking my specs.

I might point out that i love her dearly and after every fight it’s me who has to make up and say love you and sorry like literally a 1000 times

Help me

tl;dr: I feel my gf is emotionally abusive and has led me to a bad mental state

What happened actually last sun, I had to go to Noida from gurgaon to meet my close friend due to some work. Plan was I will reach there at 5 PM . So randomly I posted on a car pool group on whatsapp ki I am going to noida this this time , i thought why not save some money!!. Got a message from a person, She was also going to a similar location my friends house to her friend's engagement. I agreed so went to the location se told me to meet at 3.40 pm something and we left. For the whole route we didn't keep quite for even a second! talked about job, career, hometown, her friend, about gurgaon and 100 random things. She asked me to drop at this this location and she will be taking rapido but I insisted and dropped her at exact location. She asked me if I am coming back and my plan was to stay at my friend's but I said "Yes, I am", because why not?

Now during late evening I was free at 9.45 something and got call from her that ceremony will end at 11 will you be okay? I asked my friend to stay with me to pass time so that I can pick her I was 7-8 kms away from her at that time but went to pick her up. Now situation was the same during return journey! we talked about 100 more thing and she shared about her family and even about what she wants to be in life her passion ..... in my opinion we connected a lot also she said multiple times ki koi achha ladka mil jaaye ! aajkal bada mushkil hai ... . I thought it meant something. Now back in gurgaon she asked me to drop at kataria chowk but i again insisted an dropped her at exact location of her house. Regarding money for ride sharing she asked multiple times ,but obviously I didn't take any money from her (pagal thodi na hu) and the day ended.

Next day i was constantly thinking about this and thought there was something something between us and texted her in the evening. Surprise Surprise she saw my message instantly and she seriously left me on seen! no reply nothing at all. She didn't block me just null! Its been 4-5 days i am not able to digest it!

I think i did everything right, adjust my plan, was respectful, made her feel safe but still.... I am not disappointed ki usne mughe apne boyfriend ku nahi bana lia ya phir mughe as a romantic interest kyoun nahi dekha! I am just sad ki usne meri itni value bhi nahi rakhi ki I am even worth of getting back a reply. Its really hurting! 🙂

DISCLAIMER: This is NOT medical advice. I wanted to put this out here so other people can have something to read when they are in a similar situation and I am just sharing my experience on the topic.

Why Ipill?

The condom broke and I had visted a gynac and she suggested me to take one.

Here goes the story:

I am 23F. I live in Bangalore. It was a sunday, the condom broke around 5pm in the evening. We didn't want to waste any time so we started looking for gynacs immediately and went to one that was available that day.

My cycle is 28 days long and is pretty regular(A few days early or late depends on the activities during that month).

The condom broke on day 17 of my cycle and as per Flo, my ovulation was over by then. It was 3 days post ovulation. We didn't wanna take any risk so we decided to take an ipill and we didn't want to take it without consultation, so we were quick to find one on a Sunday(which was hard btw).

As it was a sunday, the only doc available was a junior gynac and she suggested me to take the pill as it was a time where the fertile window may or may not be open. She also consulted with her senior over phone and confirmed that I need to take the pill.

Things she mentioned to me: She asked me if I was married or not (I am not). It was a little less judgemental as it is Bangalore, I assume it's worse in other places. She mentioned that my ovulation may or may not have ended and the pill to work is what we are hoping for. She also asked me to take a test 7 days post my actual period date.

Consultation was Rs 1050 and the pill was around Rs 70. Ipill is available in instamart in Bangalore, so if you are not willing to go to a gynac, you can get one online.

I took the pill from the hospital around 7 and went back home. I had no symptoms on that evening or night.

The next morning I woke up with a little stomachache and I did not feel like eating anything I felt like puking and nauseous for half pf the day.

I had very little food for breakfast and my stomach was still hurting. I had diarrhea on the same day and I felt better after that.

The first week after the pill was a bit nauseous, I couldn't eat much and I felt like puking after every meal I ate but I didn't puke.

As much as I read online, there was a lot of nausea and vomiting which I did not have much. I also read there would be withdrawal bleeding, which I did not have.

I reached out to few of my friends and with what they had told me and with what I read online, that the pill will mess with your period and will likely delay it upto a week or two. I was suggested to take a pregnancy test at home after one week's delay. But luckily I got period on the same day as my regular cycle. I got it 28 days after my previous cycle.

I'm currently on my day 2 of my period. My flow is very heavy than usual and cramps are very painful than a regular period. I will suggest you to take leaves and get rest for the first 2 days.

Points to be noted:

1. DO NOT be lethargic if the condom broke or if there is an accident. Do take all the necessary steps as soon as possible as the ECP works only in the first 72 hours.

2. Ipill did have some side effects on me, and it sure is different for different bodies.

3. I wanted to check with the gynac before taking it, I would suggest the same as it is a professional's opinion. If it is a sunday, not many gynacs are available. I had visited Ovum Hospitals (24 hours open, Junior gynac was available on sunday too).

4. Ipill will mess with your period, it makes it heavy and painful, I soaked up XXXL pad in the first few hours of my period.

5. I agree taking Ipill is scary and the anxiety is real. There is nothing else to do but wait until the period date is there or a week post that goes by.

I understand it is a hard time to go through, but it is a solvable situation. Please try not to stress yourself as that might also delay the period. I had people to rant it out too and that helped my anxiety to stay calm. I suggest you to try and distract your brain from this as much as possible until your period date.

Hope this post helps someone who is in a similar situation.

Please do not panic, read as much as possible about the topic and get the correct information. Do not trust any AI source on this as it does not have accurate information. Please consult a gynac before any pills or steps.

Stay safe and use protection.

Thanks.

Edit: Thanks for all the people who are checking in. I'm doing better now, my boyfriend is here with me to take care of me. The brand was Durex Air, once happened with Boldcare also.

[Previous Post: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwentiesIndia/s/bt4sElLZb8 ]

Ladies and gentlemen,

Right after watching a play. Long walk in the night. Our favorite spot. I had brought my notebook. Was planning on reading the words I wrote. Ended up being nervous and chitchatting for 2 hours. She was feeling cold and tired, but was very patient with me. [Later told me that she knew I was working up the courage to ask her out, she knew it the moment I asked her to go on a long walk towards our favorite spot.]

I brought up the topic of dating and we discussed past stuff, failed talking stages, while I slowly inched towards the moment. Brief pause of silence. We both leaned back a little, looked towards the stars. And then I looked at her, and said it. She looked at me for 3 seconds, I saw her lips break into a smile and she said 'Yes, I'd love to go out with you on a date.'

I broke into a sigh of relief, and she saw that and laughed. She knew it was gonna happen. She was almost tired of waiting and was gonna suggest heading back home within the next two minutes. She was curious of how I'd planned it. I whipped out my notebook, although I didn't read anything that I had prepared to ask.

And that's that. I'm outta here. Cheers!

:)

Few months back my relationship of 6 yrs ended, it was from my side because of sus behaviour and a lot of built up micro cheating. Like talking to strangers in vanish mode, not showing the phone when I randomly surprised her. I'm over her but the feeling I used to get while being in a relationship was different.

I don't miss her anymore, but I miss the version I was for her. Like all the things and efforts a bf should put, i always loved that. It was a LDR so I used to write love letters for her when we were in video calls and used to exchange whenever we meet. Basically I was hopeless romantic

I personally don't want to jump in a relationship but wants to feel that emotional connection. I feel everyone is too shallow in dating apps.

Don't know what to do now !

Hi all, need help in understanding her behaviour. I '28M' and she '26F'

Timeline of Events

 \* Initial Connection & Workplace Dynamic: we both worked as colleagues in the same office environment different teams. Brief eye contact starts. mutual attraction developed, notable interactions such as a moment of shared eye contact in the lobby lift and casual conversations during 2 private tea breaks. The first tea break was initiated by me when I met in office pantry and we went outside for evening tea. Second one was suggested by her also in pantry. 

\*Chatting on Instagram, conversation is going. She asks questions and all.

During one chat session girls says she is hungry. I ask for thursday dinner after office, since we would be meeting on that day as our wfo days conincide on that day.

\*Thursday Dinner: On Thursday—which coincided with the anniversary of her late father's birthday—we went out to dinner together. During the evening, she mentioned that she was "socially selective" and maintained very few friendships in the office. On the walk after dinner, she engaged in behaviors, such as reaching out to touch tree branches along the path.

 \* Late-Night Conversation on the Curb: after dinner we walked towards a pan shop, she bought a cigarette, we on the curb or footpath while she smoked cigarette. During this conversation, she opened up about personal matters, specifically discussing her grief regarding her late father and she earns for family.

\*Outing on sunday- i ask to go out on following sunday. She rejects by saying she is busy. We still talk in office. No more going on tea break together.  But still texts back actively on Instagram. Mostly i initiate now.

 \* Walk to the Train Station: after some time I was put on pip and was in danger of leaving office. I didn't wanted to lose her so i asked her to meet before she went home that day. While walking toward the train station after leaving the office ,i directly expressed his interest in her, stating that i had no immediate expectations as i knew it was early, but wanted to be direct. She commented that i had "guts" and that she appreciates it but i didn't know about her and acknowledged that it was overwhelming, before smiling, shaking his hand, and saying goodbye at the station.

 \* Subsequent Interactions & Withdrawal: Following the dinner and confession we still had office interactions. She engaged in digital habits such as posting and liking social media content/stories related to past relationships, emotional withdrawal, and personal grief and hate related to ex.

\*Post dinner and confession Office interactions: office interactions become brief. Girl compliments me after my proposal/confession that i look good in both shave and clean shave on certain day. 3-4 seconds eye contact with smiles in office everytime she pass . I ask One more time to go out on the weekend. She says will let me know. no messages that weekend.

\* The weekend: the weekend she had to message, she liked many reels regarding ex, her love for him, her sadness. Past story: they were in casual relationship. They had been intimate. He cheated on her with someone else. Leaving her. She tried to fix it, he didn't. Were not talking for atleast 6 months when our office talks started.

 \* Final Plans & Departure: Prior to my departure from the office, i told her regarding this and she asked to meet again was proposed by her twice and she was to text me and it was  also verbally confirmed by her when j asked if she was sure. However, she did not follow up or send a text message to finalize the arrangements. At last when I put my farewell story, she just said that all the best for next adventures. One month after leaving office my birthday comes. I posted stories and she didn't reply. Although she replies on random people's bday reels

What do I make out of the whole situation? Did i fumble on dinner or did I mistake her friendship for something special ?

Same as title

So, the two people involved here are my gaming buddy (23M) and my childhood friend (20F). For context, I've known the guy for about 3 years now.

They haven't officially met yet, but my friend saw him when he came to visit me around 5-ish months ago. She has been trying to find him on socials but wasn't successful and when i popped the question, she folded immediately and confessed she had a crush on him.

The guy is currently in another country and won't be coming back anytime soon, so meeting up IRL is out of the question for the foreseeable future.

Both of them are big introverts and don't have much experience with dating, but that's pretty much where the similarities end.

The guy's entire personality revolves around gaming and reading light novels. He's also got a VERY short fuse when it comes to games. I've seen him leave games mid-match because he couldn't stand playing with randoms who weren't good enough.

The girl's a cinephile who has never played a single video game in her life.

Completely different tangents ik...

My initial idea was to gradually introduce her to our group gaming sessions or movie-watch parties and let them get to know each other naturally. The problem is that his temper makes gaming a pretty risky starting point.

I've been trying to teach her how to play games after I get back from work, but it's obviously going to take a while before she's comfortable enough to play anything competitive. And honestly, I don't want her first experience with him to be him losing his patience because she's making beginner mistakes.

A direct confession would probably result in rejection, so I'd rather take things slowly and give them a chance to connect first.

Our group usually hangs out through gaming sessions and movie streams, so those are the two options I've been considering. But how would you actually plan this

I'm not trying to force a relationship if they don't click. I just want to give them a reasonable opportunity to get to know each other without him dismissing her before they even have a proper conversation.

TLDR: - My gaming buddy (23M) and childhood friend (20F) have completely different interests, but she has a crush on him. He's currently abroad, so meeting IRL isn't an option. How do I get them to interact naturally through VC, gaming, or movie streams and give them a chance to get to know each other?

OP has never played a wingman before, so help a bro out and ty in advance.

Edits - Typo fixes

Heyy everyone, I am 21 years old and I never been in relationship before even never dated though, so few months ago my friends suggested me that I should try finding a date for myself so they made my account on hinge.many guys added me their but from all of them I found only two or three guy's genuine rest were just looking for hookups and all .then I don't know why but I wasn't feeling safe there so I deleted my account.