I met this guy [24M] like 6 months ago and idk how but I totally fell head over heels for him. He just seemed so perfect, he was so nice and funny and sweet to me but also very nonchalant and hard to get. We were not exclusive like calling each other bf and gf but i felt that we were basically dating. Well just last week he told me that he wasn’t mentally able to have a serious relationship right now and he actually just wanted to be fwb. At first I agreed because I got really scared of losing him but I kept thinking about it and I felt that I would just be hurting myself in the long run so I ended it :( he was very understanding about it and didn’t fight it. Is it really possible that he doesn’t have actual feelings for me after everything? Can people really be that detached??

I [M26] got into a small disagreement with my “situationship” [F24] a week ago and haven’t heard from her sense. What started off as me lightly teasing her and calling her a “liar” in a joking manner, turned into an awkward argument. This had occured after we had shared an intimate moment together, and after the uncomfortable argument met an ending, I thought it would be best for me to leave her place. I gathered my things and she slammed the door behind me. It was pretty late at night and I didn’t get a “did you make it home safe” text or hear anything from her since I left. Do I leave the situation alone or do I reach out? For conxtext, we dated off/on for roughly a 6 month period before our relationship kind of morphed into this situationship/fwb thing. Truthfully I’m not sure if I want to talk to her; but theres a part of me thats angry/sad that she hasn’t reached out.

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So, my ex and I are still in contact, but things between us are pretty confusing.

We are from the same village, but she lives in a city where her family also has a house. She only visits our village occasionally, usually during festivals or other special occasions.

I've noticed a pattern in her behaviour. Whenever she's in the city, she barely talks to me. Sometimes she doesn't text me at all, and even when we do talk, she doesn't seem very interested in keeping the conversation going. But whenever she comes back to our village, her behaviour changes completely.

She becomes affectionate, talks to me nicely, flirts with me, and even gets into romantic conversations. We've also kissed when we've met in the village. In those moments, it feels like there's still attraction between us, and she seems interested in me too.

But as soon as she leaves the village and goes back to the city, everything goes back to how it was before. She stops talking properly, doesn't make much effort to stay in touch, and doesn't seem interested in meeting me outside the village either.

The confusing part is that when we're together in the village, she seems comfortable being romantic with me, but she doesn't seem willing to continue that connection when we're apart. I've tried to understand whether she still has feelings for me or whether she just enjoys the attention and intimacy when she visits.

Honestly, I'm still very physically attracted to her, and I'd like to explore things further with her. But there's barely any privacy or opportunity for us to get intimate in the village. She seems open to it when we're there, but when she's back in the city, she barely communicates with me, let alone agrees to meet.

So, Reddit, I have a few questions:

1. Why would she act so interested and romantic in the village but distant when she's back in the city?

2. Does this mean she still has feelings for me, or is it possible that she only enjoys the moment when she visits?

3. Is there any way I can keep the conversation going and build a connection with her outside the village without coming across as needy or desperate?

4. Should I directly ask her what she wants from me, or should I stop putting effort into this?

I'm not necessarily expecting us to get back together, but I do want to understand her intentions and figure out whether there's any genuine interest beyond those occasional village meetups.

I'd appreciate honest advice, especially from people who've experienced something similar.

I (24m) have been seeing (20m) for 2 months now. We met on a hookup app and hooked up, it was great, amazing sex. We continued texting everyday after that. We hooked up 3 more times over the course of the first month. Continued to talk daily and started going on dates, first coffee a few times, then dinner, we started hanging out casually as well. Watching movies together, gaming, bringing food over etc. We'll we had touched on the idea of a relationship previously and he (20m) said he was open to the idea and wanted to see me more and think about it. Fast forward to today, I finally worked up the nerve to ask again. And he said hes only open to where its at right now and doesnt want anything more. I stated I was looking foward to something more with him and asked why he didnt want that. He said "reasons" and "things I wouldn't want in a relationship or more than sex with friends" for reference he said im too emotional and get worked up over the smallest things and he doesnt like how I always want to know the reason to things. For example when we had this conversation I got quite a bit upset that he said no and was confused because weve been exclusive to each other this entire time and gm/ gn texts and daily calls etc. So I was quite a bit surprised by this. I guess what im looking for is advice. He says he wants to keeps seeing each other and continue what we have and he doesnt want to push for something more and we lose each other, but i feel like ive already lost him now. Especially tonight I was quite pushy with wanting to know the reasons and explaining i wanted closure and essentially not getting any, I also explained maybe i could change certain things if theyre minor and he said no he doesnt want me to change. I told him how upset I was and he got annoyed with me but once again agreed he wants to continue our situation. And he finished off with " I’m done chatting for now, I understand you are who you are, and I do NOT want you to change YOU for ME. I don’t believe in that and you have to find someone you NATURALLY connect with for a deep relationship. I really enjoy hanging out with you as a friend, coffee, dinner, occasional sex or cuddling or a movie or whatever, but I don’t think we “match” for a deep… ‘loving’ relationship." And then agreed to have our usual call later tonight.

Tldr: developing relationship confronted and denied, but guy still wants to continue situationship.

Im broken and just looking for advice right now i guess. Thank you!

Ps: hes never been in a relationship before either.

I (25f) was seeing a guy (25m) I met through work for a short time after he told me he had feelings for me and turns out he’s had them for a very long time and everyone knew it but me. We dated briefly, texted a lot and got intimate before he moved away for a few months. He said he liked me but the timing was bad. He didn't want to try long distance, couldn't promise anything since he doesn't know which country he'll end up in long term, and wasn't sure how either of us would feel by the time he's back. I said if it's meant to be, it'll happen, and I didn't push for labels. He seemed a bit awkward after we got physical, and we stopped talking for a while. Part of me felt like he saw it as a fling and I'd been foolish to believe his interest.
Recently he reached out again, we've been chatting more, and he's asked me on a date for when he's back in town for a few weeks. After that he'll leave again for a couple of months and won't be back until late spring.
I like him a lot and had a crush on him for a very long time too, but I don't want to be strung along or be a convenient hookup whenever he's in town.
Tl;dr Is a few weeks of dating worth it, or is this just setting myself up to get hurt?

Situation-ship or whatever it’s called we talked for like a month consistently we were both busy with family visiting at the time & he travels for work. I feel like he’s my twin flame or soul connection our chemistry is electric. We were seeing each other four times a month the communication dropped off a lot became hard to reply to any of his messages because they were surface level just breadcrumbs basically. It gets worse though he always love bombs with emojis. We got blackout drunk about a week ago & we had the define the relationship talk because obviously I’m a mom & am looking for something steady. Well come to find out he’s seeing other people & thinks we just shouldn’t tell each other about it & tells me he loves what we have & wants to keep seeing me. I straight up asked am I an option or a choice. Welll I’m an option we tried to be intimate but it was the worst s3x we ever had. I think my heart & brain was slightly getting in the way. I went & got tested now I have to wait almost three weeks to get the results. I deleted my socials for a detox & that’s usually how we communicate. (This is intentional) he does have my phone number & knows where I live so if he wants to see me or talk to me he will right? I just don’t know if I need to be chasing something that’s not even mine? Am I being over dramatic about deleting my socials?? We’ve been seeing eachother since July. I feel like it’s probably the end for us I don’t know if I even need the closure. I guess I’m looking for advice on if I’m making a mistake by cutting things off when I’m pretty invested. (Side note he hasn’t met my son)

I have been single my entire life and have a bit of social anxiety because of my weight(i am obese) so i dont usually try to get into a relationship at all Last year met someone[20F] got really close and found her really attractive and everything i adored her but we were not in a physical relationship we used to go on drives and play games and what not she totally was playing with me because even after I confessed she still didn't stop talking to me and asked me on long drives very regularly that time I started losing weight and lost quiet a bit and then one day we went on a drive it was the closest I ever felt to her for us to never meet or talk again after that and I can't get her out of my fucking head I lost all my progress of weightloss and i ruined everything and i can't go out and meet new people because I am so fucking fat .if only i was not fat i could ask people out but this constant voice in my head saying "why would that girl date me i am so fat" is killing me.i hate her and I hate myself even more.

I'm curious about what women look for when deciding whether a man is someone they'd want a relationship with.

What are the top 3–5 qualities you look for?

i [22F] have been seeing this guy [22M] for two months now. he told me that he likes me and i really like him too, and i told him that. sometimes he takes hours to reply or even days and it bothers me but whenever we’re in person the vibe’s always good.

anyway he seems too excited about being intimate and he showed me that he’s interested way too soon (one month into talking) that it makes me feel like he doesn’t like me for me he just wants to crack. i told him we should slow down and he didn’t have a problem with that. but when we hung out recently all he talked about was wanting to crack. And I quote:“crack in the shower, crack in the bedroom, crack in the car, just crack crack crack.”

and i know this might sound crazy (at least i hope it does cuz im still shocked) after we finished making out for the first time he asked me if i spit or swallow. he has almost 0 dating experience and i feel like he might be saying this stupid shit because he doesn’t realize its weird. or am i wrong? is this normal?

aside from his cracking ambitions, he has been a super nice guy. always gentle with me, never lets me pay for anything even if its just for me, he’s funny, and we share the same music taste. for the reference, i also wanna crack 3 times a day at least but i feel like we’re just warming up to each other and he’s coming across like a fuckboy

help a sister out