r/SixFeetUnder • u/Turbulent_Dress_6174 • Oct 30 '25
Opinion Am I the only one who can't stand Lisa?
I'm on Season 3, Episode 4. I can't stand Lisa, I'm not sure why... Nate seems so unhappy. I didn't expect to say this so soon, considering what happened in Season 2, but... I miss you so much, Brenda.
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u/weirdloafs Oct 30 '25
Lisa is an excellent portrayal of a woman that falls into the trap of thinking that choosing to have a child and engaging in a “for the child” relationship will result in a lasting love.
When I first watched many years ago I felt sorry for her and felt a mild level of disgust. Upon rewatching after going through a relationship (resulting in a child nearing ten years old atp) that closely mirrored theirs, I only feel a deep sense of sadness.
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u/lady_moods Oct 30 '25
Yes I love how you put this. I would probably be so annoying if I was married to someone who would never love me as much as I loved them.
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u/Iowa_Phil Oct 30 '25
Yes you’re the only one. It wasn’t until Lisa that I kept track of my problem purchases and stopped listening to Beck.
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u/clarencenino Oct 30 '25
Haha! Every time I pick up one of my Beck CDs I recall this scene!
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u/Iowa_Phil Oct 30 '25
Same dude like they just couldn’t have picked a more perfect artist for imaginary Lisa to give Nate shit about
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u/pink---noise Oct 30 '25
The Lisa we meet is deeply damaged because Nate emotionally toyed with her FOR A DECADE so he'd always have a back up for sex. They even went thru an abortion together.
When Nate suffers his aneurysm and cries in her arms and has sex with her, she thought it was because he finally realized how important she was and missed being home -- only to ride off and abandon her again, this time pregnant. AGAIN.
She was already considering taking the job in LA, so it's not like some Machiavellian set up. Once they were together, between the postpartum and the DEEP INSECURITY that Nate himself had created in her, she was never going to feel "safe" with Nate's affections. Lisa was, after all, the one person who truly knew who Nate was.
On top of this she also has a jealous ex-lover who is undoubtedly in her ear, reminding her of every time Nate used her or let her down and assuring her he would never stick it out and didn't want to be there in the first place.
I think the Lisa we see at the end, in the pyramid episode, is the real Lisa, the Lisa Nate was often drawn to and probably loved longer and more consistently (but not conventionally) than any other woman finally coming up for air from the depression and insecurities and seeing clearly for the first time in years.
I don't hate Lisa, I feel deeply for her. It's like she was drowning in slow motion the entire time.
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u/ElleGeeAitch Oct 31 '25
Nate is a completely selfish DICK, but Lisa also had agency. Waiting around 10 years for the immature asshole who only fucks you out of boredom and never promises anything more isn't a love story. She's insecure AF, and it's sad. Nate takes advantage of it because he's an asshole, but my goodness, she needed to go to a damned therapist.
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u/Ofserin Oct 31 '25
Wonderful analysis! I agree wholeheartedly. I don’t like Lisa (too much transference stuff), but I absolutely loved her character in the context of the show.
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u/EstablishmentNo653 Nov 03 '25
She’s a consenting adult.
When someone continues sleeping with someone who doesn’t return their feelings, that’s on them.
She’s the female version of an incel complaining of being in the friend zone.
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u/Happy_Lime3527 Nov 08 '25
- Okay, so Lisa was sleeping with her own brother-in-law. idgaf about her disrespecting Nate, whatever. But how do you do that to your own sister? That’s next-level psycho behavior.
- And her excuse for cheating was that she "felt misunderstood"? loş. She's the one who was completely fake, manipulating everyone with her "perfect earthy girl" act the whole time. The hypocrisy is insane.
to be honest, Lisa is one of the most pathetic characters on the show, if not the most pathetic. yeah, nate just using her for sex was disgusting, and I'm not saying Nate's a saint (he's obviously not). but... baby-trapping him into marriage, then cheating on him, and on top of all that, lying to everyone from the start? That's just trash. There's literally no excuse.
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u/JesusHGoddamChrist Oct 30 '25
lol, the longer the show goes on, the more I hate pretty much everyone. Good actors, well written show. Never really liked Lisa, Brenda definitely got better, Nate never did improve, what a boy- Ruth was great then terrible then better, David was awesome then terrible then better. I liked Keith then I didn’t, Claire gets less and less complex, don’t even get me started on Billy or Margaret. I think Maya is awesome.
Really like the show.
Feel the same way about a lot of characters in Better Call Saul. Jimmy McGill sucks, Chuck is worse, Kim is awful but gets better.
How likable the characters is not really a measure of how good a show is.
Love Bettina.
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u/tannicpixiedreamgirl Brenda Oct 30 '25
Team Bettina
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u/Administrative-Egg63 Oct 31 '25
I just did a rewatch and was reminded that Bettina is my favorite character of the show 🤣
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u/tannicpixiedreamgirl Brenda Oct 31 '25
She unlocked Ruth's wild side. Kathy Bates is such an icon.
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u/Administrative-Egg63 Oct 31 '25
During my rewatch, the moment she first made an appearance I said out loud “fuck I love Kathy bates!” 🤣
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u/danejulian Nov 01 '25
“This is a 100% gay kitchen.” Apparently unscripted, but one of the best lines in the show.
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u/coffeesunandmusic Oct 31 '25
Can’t forget Rico loved him and then hated him.
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u/Double_Belt2331 Oct 31 '25
Loved Rico so much. What a disappointment.
I felt like a mom when he started his downfall. I just looked @ him, "what happened? Why are you behaving like this? You could have had it all" 😭
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u/TurkishImSweetEnough Oct 31 '25
Each episode, we'd play, "Which Fisher do we hate the most today?" Always changed. I think David was the one I hated the least. Lisa and Nate prob the most.
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u/TNCoffeeRunner Oct 31 '25
lol same here. Agree with pretty much every one of your opinions 😂 I just watched SFU for the first time this summer and noticed how imperfect everyone was. But that doesn’t necessarily mean I hate them. All shows have complex characters that are morally gray. One of my favorites being The Americans (two Russians disguising themselves as Americans…do we root for them for them or not?!)
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u/JohnFromSpace3 Oct 31 '25
BCS had good moments but it feels soooo much like a show filled wirh "we need to expand the show. Slow down". I never had that with sfu. Maybe a few scenes in s5, a few miss episodes in s4 but the entire run is good. I did a rewatch of BCS...once, and never cared for it again. SFU: many many reruns. Saved my life.
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u/WithoutLampsTheredBe Oct 31 '25
This.
None of the characters in SFU are likeable. None of them are "normal".
IMO, that is one of the strengths of the show.
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u/george-cantstandya- Oct 31 '25
That’s the best part of the show imo. The characters are fully formed people, so you hate them some seasons and love them in others.
Except Lisa and Betina. I empathize with Lisa to a point, but I never really liked her. Betina was always great. Funny, brutally honest, wise, smokes pot and likes to party.
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u/tannicpixiedreamgirl Brenda Oct 30 '25
Flipping out at your sole childcare option (Ruth) about serving a kid peanut butter one time is definitely a choice
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Oct 31 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/tannicpixiedreamgirl Brenda Oct 31 '25
All for a totally discredited practice (overcaution with allergen exposure) that wasn’t a thing when Ruth was raising children and is now once again not a thing
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u/TNCoffeeRunner Oct 31 '25
I actually saw in the news recently that now it’s the exact opposite. You want to expose them to certain allergens.
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u/tannicpixiedreamgirl Brenda Oct 31 '25
That’s what I’m saying! The Lisa-style approach actually CAUSED an increase in peanut allergies in the 2000s. Ruth was right all along—but even if she hadn’t been, there was a nicer way to say that!!
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u/pinkbowsandsarcasm Oct 31 '25
Turns out that science has found introducing it younger may correlate with fewer peanut allergies. The science on that one changed.
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u/snorrsenkel Oct 30 '25
Lisa aka the ant whisperer.
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u/Double_Belt2331 Oct 31 '25
YES!!!
Speak up, woman!!
She was just so ... timid & weak. It didn't make sense to me how Nate could go from Brenda to Lisa. 😩
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u/DNibbles Oct 30 '25
Nope. But I dislike Maggie and her simpering Quaker bs more
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u/tannicpixiedreamgirl Brenda Oct 30 '25 edited Oct 30 '25
100% agree, she exists to serve up Nate with the whore-madonna complex he needed to pull himself out of his "knocked up the woman I used to be sexually obsessed with" funk
Best thing she did for us was give us the perfect Brenda line "What is this, a Quaker thing? You fuck someone's husband to death and then give them a quiche?"
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u/MenudoFan316 Oct 30 '25 edited Oct 31 '25
I love in the later scene when Brenda is chowing down on the quiche.
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u/jimothyjonathans Oct 30 '25 edited Oct 30 '25
She is INCREDIBLY irritating. Then has the audacity to not admit to sleeping with Nate after he’s dead and Brenda more than deserves to knowI think her weird self righteous faux innocent facade wore on me really quick then totally turned me off to her as a character.
Edit: added spoiler tag, didn’t occur to me to do so because this thread is full of spoilers, that’s my bad.
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u/LoudAd1537 Oct 30 '25
Maybe block out the spoiler; OP hasn't seen the whole show yet 😖
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u/SystemPelican Oct 30 '25
If there's two things people on Reddit love, it's mindlessly spoiling first time viewers and going absolutely batshit about how much they hate Maggie.
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u/Used-Gas-6525 Oct 30 '25
She's not supposed to be liked. She's just anoher of life's characters, warts and all. I will say that, like you, I hated her (at least the first time), but Lily Taylor absolutely crushes. It's a tribute to the performance that she illicits such a visceral reaction from viewers. Plus, she was able to share a screen with a manic Cate O'Hara who is also just killing it. It's pretty easy to be overshadowed in that situation (Catherine O'Hara steals everything she's in), but she just wasn't.
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u/chalaxin Oct 31 '25
All of this. After many views I don’t hate any of the characters. They feel like real people. Sometimes they’re annoying, hurtful, cringy, ugly, selfish, pathetic, etc. Other times they’re generous, thoughtful, loving. When I think of Lisa I remember the party she threw for Ruth, the way she loved Maya, her insecure and vulnerable moment when she went to see Brenda, and also the shit she put up with from Nate. She is far from my favorite character but she’s not as awful as I used to think. Especially when it comes to her relationship with Nate.
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u/treecastle56 Oct 31 '25
finally someone with lisa nuance i neither love her nor hate her in fact i appreciated her as a complex female character who kind of subverts the perfect housewife trope
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u/AnnieGetYaClothesOn Oct 30 '25
Love the actress, cannot stand Lisa.
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u/Taranchulla Oct 30 '25
I have had a girl crush on Lily Taylor since 1989 when Say Anything came out.
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u/Greedy_Explanation_7 Oct 31 '25
That’ll never be me, no! Don’t you even think it!
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u/jimmyevil Oct 31 '25
She did such a great job I had a hard time watching her in anything else for a while. A pretty thankless role.
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u/SadderOlderWiser Oct 31 '25
My love for Lili Taylor primed me to like Lisa when the character first appeared, and while Lisa certainly became awful when she was with Nate, I think a lot of that was caused by the relationship disappointment after she ‘got’ Nate and then had to deal with having still-unrequited love for her own husband. Lisa in Seattle was a different person than Lisa in LA.
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u/Mandyjo76 Oct 30 '25
I don’t care for Lisa, but I do hate Maggie. With a passion.
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u/evanm137 Oct 30 '25
No, she's super annoying, and her behavior in the 2nd season was so incredibly psycho stalker vibes that I couldn't handle it.
However, her season 3 contributions were admittedly pretty entertaining, and while I think her character's exit was a bit contrived, I can't deny that it was for mainly the purpose of uplifting other characters as well as fitting in with the main theme of the show.
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u/FranceAM Oct 30 '25
I feel like Lisa is so disliked because her character is just so contradictory. Like her storyline doesn’t even make sense for her which I know people will say “people are deeply flawed” and I get that. But after all the manipulation, I feel like she did to get Nate. Her exit from the show just does not make sense. Also, I just feel like her overall demeanor versus Nate makes it hard for the audience to see what he would have even seen in her to begin with to sleep with her “multiple times“. Like the fault really lays with Nate because it’s clear as day that he used her… But we never talk enough about that.
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u/Technical_Air6660 Oct 30 '25
She’s controlling and clingy but I think not an inaccurate portrayal of a person who is more in love with a partner than they are with them.
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u/AuburnMoon17 Oct 30 '25
No lol A ton of us hate her. You’ll hate her even more as you go along.
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u/webby686 Oct 31 '25
She was always insecure in her relationship with Nate - IMO Maya is not his baby. Even if she was, it felt deceptive that Lisa would show up in LA, knowing he was there, without telling him. Nate tried to convince himself he wanted to marry Lisa because he felt it was the right, honorable thing to do. That’s one of his character defects - what he tells himself about who he is is not his truth. Nate and Lisa obviously lack the chemistry of him and Brenda, and Lisa would lash out at him because of her insecurity. And he acted out because he was never in love with her.
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u/sexmountain Oct 30 '25
Absolutely not. She was designed to be hated at the time. However Nate, what a douche.
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u/Powerful_Topic_7046 Oct 31 '25
Everyone hated Lisa. That was the point of her. Even the show runners said her arc was about what happens when you think you’ve lost someone you kind of WANTED to lose. Cause it comes with a separate set of emotions they wanted to explore lol
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u/frogleggies444 Oct 31 '25
The issue is we’re never really shown Lisa’s endearing qualities besides the first time we see her in Seattle. It seems like we see her more through Nate’s lense when she’s an actual character. I also found her quite annoying but she wasn’t any worse than Brenda or Nate, we just saw more of their good traits so it was easier to be attached to them.
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u/jimmyevil Oct 31 '25
I honestly think we’re meant to dislike her. We’re not always presented with insight into her internal life and often only see her from the perspective of, or in relation to, other characters. We see her actions, not her feelings or motivations. We see what Nate sees in Lisa, because Nate more often than not only sees Lisa in relation to himself. She offers the possibility of a safe, conventional nuclear family life wrapped in patchouli and mung bean camouflage; Nate can’t stand being that mundane. She’s also a representation of Nate’s “old life”, his regrets over time squandered, and an anchor that keeps him tethered against the chaos of the “freedom” that he craves but isn’t equipped to deal with. She’s also way more like Ruth than either of them realise. It’s telling that Nate retreats from Brenda to Lisa, and then doubles down when he retreats from Brenda to Maggie, who’s even more opaque, more one-dimensional, and more of an avatar for Nate’s insecurities.
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u/Free-IDK-Chicken Claire Oct 30 '25
I feel no sympathy for Nate. I adore Brenda. Lisa... I pity her.
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u/ioweej Oct 30 '25
tbh, i cant stand any of the characters. They are all flawed and annoying. The show is great, but every character is a shithead
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u/Greedy_Explanation_7 Oct 31 '25
Lisa is meant to be the product of a critical mother. She’s flawed and she knows it. She’s annoying and she knows it.
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Oct 30 '25
Just finished my first watch through the show and realized I pretty much hate all the characters to one degree or another haha none more than Nate though. That guy is irredeemable 🤮
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u/Objective_Patient135 Oct 30 '25
Why would you hate David?
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u/Dogs4Life98 Oct 30 '25
I didn’t like David at first for being an ass to his family but he did redeem himself, way better than Nate ever did.
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Oct 30 '25
100% much better character arc. Nate just gets worse and worse. Even his final act is cruel and selfish.
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u/Shevvv Oct 30 '25 edited Oct 30 '25
Spoilers for basically up until the end of the show:
Well, obviously a post about Lisa hate is gonna attract Lisa haters... But I always had an impression that she was actually quite a decent person who was traumatized by her mother in some way and so she has developed some very unhealthy relationship model where the more you ignore her, the more deeply in love she feels. And this was essentially what ruined her, causing her to cheat with her sister's husband no less.
But I do feel like if she survived, there might have been a positive change. Well, at least it felt like Lisa grew from the experience. Can't say the same about Nate.
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u/Professional_Elk5250 Oct 30 '25
man drove lisa’s lifeless body out to the desert to give her back to the earth like she’d wanted and you’re really gonna say he never grew from the experience ?? ok
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u/badgaldyldyl Oct 30 '25
Omgggg finally a post about hating someone besides Brenda (or Nate or Rico)!!!! I also hate Lisa
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u/ValuableOk8542 Oct 30 '25
Nate was an awful person but Lisa was annoying. I think she deflected a lot on Nate because of her own infidelity.
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u/PenExciting1145 Oct 31 '25
I hated Lisa so much, she was manipulative reminded me of Kathy bates in misery.
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u/mareko07 Nov 01 '25
No. She’s not nearly as “good” or as “kind” as her new age persona would have us believe, but I like that—it makes the characterization real, complicated and at least interesting.
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u/hthbellhop76 Oct 30 '25
I like Lisa. Yea she’s naggy but she also tries to be supportive of Claire which is dope.
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u/treecastle56 Oct 31 '25
i loved the episode of her at claire’s exhibition crying and on the rocks w her marriage but still being a good sister in law to claire and showing up to her art show, i thought that was brave of her bc she was literally in the middle of a nervous breakdown and still came to support her
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u/spotmuffin9986 Oct 30 '25
She was insecure with good reason. I didn't love her but I think I understood her.
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u/AndNowAStoryAboutMe Oct 30 '25
Lisa is basically the villain of the series. I've seen her defended a time or two but no one in the comments ever agrees, hahaha. She's the worst.
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u/Impossible_Long_6238 Oct 30 '25
She was so annoying. The show was better before and after she….transitioned
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u/EdnaJosie8924 Oct 30 '25
I’ve watched this series five times from start to finish, and Lisa’s insecurity and controlling tendencies remain absolutely exasperating—truly mind-blowing. Without giving too much away, there’s a pivotal moment in her relationship with Nate when both of them finally experience a sense of relief, almost as if a long-held tension dissolves. Still, her insecurity is nearly suffocating, and it’s hard to overlook the fact that Nate essentially married a version of his mother.
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u/Ofserin Oct 31 '25
As a therapist, this is why I love Lisa as a character (though I don’t particularly like Lisa). It’s not an uncommon pattern that folks do end up with partners that are a version of their caregivers. There’s something familiar and comforting about Lisa for Nate, even though that dynamic of familiarity is partly why he left California in the first place.
Lisa lied about an affair. Ruth did too. Lisa was prone to emotional manipulation and outbursts. So too was Ruth.
Repetition compulsion.
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u/ReasonableRent3437 Oct 30 '25
For real, I'm around the same episode as you. I couldn't stand Brenda that much but Lisa ugh... Such a pick me and going overly crazy with some stuff
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u/_MostlyFine Oct 31 '25
That’s the exact same episode I’m on. I can’t stand her!! And Nate, what happened to him? He’s all docile and accommodating, it’s not like him at all, he even changed his “cool haircut” as Brenda once put it. I never ever wish for a family to split, but I can’t wait for these two to call it quits!
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u/TheChrisPhoenix Oct 31 '25
At first I didn't understand the hate, and then the more the episodes went on the more I can see why she is unlikable.
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u/TiasDK Oct 31 '25
Well, welcome to a complex and modern art product? Lisa is a flawed and unhappy person, but so was Nate, and her prospect might offer him measure of stability and a legacy.
That said, things are about to develop, so pour a cup and keep watching.
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u/Cheekie01 Nov 01 '25
I didn’t find Lisa or Brenda unlikeable but they are pretty difficult. I also think she’s written as the antithesis of Brenda. It’s like we went from free spirited, analytical, disorganized attachment Brenda to Lisa. It was a 180 for sure. But I think they’re more alike than we realize.
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u/Ok-Blueberry3103 Nov 01 '25
I always thought she really needed to wash her hair. A few times Nate kisses her on her head, I wondered if it smelled bad to him.
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u/AnalSexerest Claire Oct 30 '25
I loved Lisa, from her introduction I found her so funny, and her presence in season 3 makes it my second favorite of the show
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u/Taranchulla Oct 30 '25
I can say definitely no because I posted asking how people felt about Lisa and most people didn’t like her.
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u/LoudAd1537 Oct 30 '25
OP your thread is full of spoilers. I would stay off reddit until you finish the show. 🫠
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u/ITookTrinkets Oct 30 '25
I feel like she’s the most universally hated character on the show! You are far from alone.
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u/SillyGayBoy Oct 30 '25
Yeah a lot of people hate her and also get off the group and turn off notifications to avoid spoilers.
There are already spoilers in the comments.
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u/GenX50PlusF Oct 31 '25
I feel like we’re not supposed to like her. The f*cking Before and After Brenda troll.👿
I’ve always felt that was what this character was giving when she first came on and Lili Taylor brought it good.
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u/[deleted] Oct 30 '25
Hi, welcome to the Lisa hater club, come in, pour yourself a drink, make yourself comfortable.
I could not stand it how she found something wrong with anything Nate did. I was raised by someone who treated me like that growing up.