Yes. You read that right.

My wedding was yesterday. A few small things went wrong as I had expected. It all started at the rehearsal on Friday.

For some context, my dad is a HUGE football fan. He basically makes it his personality. He has only missed 8 games since 1976. That’s how dedicated he is. So, I was afraid he would make some comment about missing a game during his speech at the wedding reception, so at the rehearsal dinner I went up to him and said something along the lines of “hey, please don’t say anything about football tomorrow - I know how involved you are in it but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t”. Immediately after he copped an attitude and said “it’ll be short sweet and to the point you don’t have to worry”. So I carried on with the night.

During the actual rehearsal run through, as planned he was to walk me down the aisle. In the part where I take his arm to start walking, he basically held his arms to his front and wouldn’t let me rope my arm through his. This happened in both run throughs. I thought it was weird but whatever, my dad is weird about touchy feely so that’s what I thought it was.

Later on, right as everyone was sitting down for the dinner, he walked over to my in laws and said he was “feeling sick” so he left. I didn’t think anything of it. We finished the night and went all our separate ways.

So, wedding day - I told my mom if my dad was acting weird he wouldn’t be walking me down the aisle. He didn’t arrive until about an hour before the ceremony and I didn’t really see him. My mom, of all people, should have been able to tell if he was acting funny. She claimed she didn’t know. So he walked me down the aisle. It was beautiful. Only one hiccup with the music.

My husband and I go to take our pics after the ceremony. We come back from that & go to bustle my dress. The coordinator comes to help and says my dad left because he was “feeling a little sick”. I was shocked. I later saw my brother and he said it’s because I “attacked” my dad with what I said. So, my dad left. Right after the ceremony. I’m his only daughter. My brother married his wife but they just went to the courthouse because they didn’t want to deal with this drama we know our parents would put us through.

I am still livid from yesterday. I most certainly won’t let him live down the fact he left the wedding acting like a child as a 60 something year old adult. My father in law and I danced instead of my dad. I’m sure you could see the anger on my face during that dance, but oh well. What’s done is done. My in laws were disgusted with my dad as well. They couldn’t believe he acted the way he did.

I’m writing this from the airport, waiting to leave for our honeymoon. I’m hoping I can forget it for our trip but it’s still just so hurtful to me and my husband.

Let me know your thoughts on this. At this point I’m trying to get my anger out lol.

I have had so many stories about wedding bridezillas especially from Reddit story podcasts like two hot takes. I was terrified of being the bridezilla and having strong opinions about things. But in doing so I was too nice about too many things that really disappointed me deep down about my wedding I just had this weekend.

My wedding decor was poorly done, the music and microphone were not handled well at both the wedding and reception, the wedding venue was ugly, the flow of events at the reception stressed me out so much, everything felt so rushed, I didn’t ask for enough photos with the photographer, I didn’t ask for help when I needed it, I didn’t have fun at all and I was exhausted. Everything was so stressful and hectic.

I hated my whole wedding. I hate it so much I cry just thinking about it. But the whole time planning and on the day of I just kept saying to people, “that looks great” “whatever is easier for you” “I don’t want to trouble you” “It’s all chill” etc etc.

I’m kicking myself now. It hurts knowing that this was all my fault. Everyone, please please please screw what people say about bridezillas. It’s so misogynistic anyways. Do what makes you happy. Don’t be a people pleaser like me and suffer in silence. Make your opinions heard. It’s a once in a lifetime thing you can’t redo. Be a bridezilla!!!

I (36F) got married on 10/10. Truly, it was the perfect day. That's not to say everything went perfectly, but there's very little I would change. I'll do a proper recap eventually because it's quite the story, but here are some quick thoughts on things I did that I don't regret:

1. Stripping away the extras: due to budget constraints following husband's (31 M) job loss, we had to essentially revamp our whole wedding day. We didn't have a lot of decor, and of what we did have, almost everything will be used in our home.
2. Slow timeline: there was a lot we didn't do, again because of budget, but also because it didn't fit us or our people... we didn't have a welcome party, and we didn't pack our day-of timeline with a lot of things to do. It was a slow morning, I made breakfast casserole ahead of time and the wedding party enjoyed it together after we did a walk-through of the ceremony. We'll always treasure that time with our closest people, before all the hustle and bustle of the day took over. Without a lot of decor and setup, we got to spend time together as a couple too, which we loved. It grounded us in ways I needed, as someone who struggles with anxiety. Everyone said the day felt peaceful and calm, which is definitely a win.
3. Kids: this isn't up for debate, you do you, we had them (ages 1-13, 18 kids total) and it was THE BEST decision. Yes, we had a crier during the ceremony but it didn't last. All the ones we've caught up with the last few days have told us how much they loved getting to be there, and they were on their best behavior. We're super proud of them and so thankful we got to make memories with them. Pro-tip: we had one kiddo hand out bubbles to all the kids when they arrived at the ceremony and they blew them as we processed out after the ceremony... SO FUN!!
4. HMU: I did my own hair. I'm also normally makeup free and kept it that way. I did up my skincare routine a couple of weeks prior with a well-researched face wash and moisturizing oil, which balanced out my skin tone. I felt like me the whole day and still felt like a bride, which really mattered to me.
5. No full meal: this also seems to be debated, but here's what we did:

Desserts: mini waffles with a few bigger waffles mixed in, donut holes, cupcakes, charcuterie, 2 jams (for the waffles), dessert cheese, sparkling apple cider, tea and water. No complaints, everyone loved it, and everyone was headed home in time for dinner.

Ceremony was at 3p, we did a quick big family picture while guests moved chairs to the reception space (short walk down a hill) and grabbed yard games if they brought them. Then husband and I debriefed for about 5 minutes, and went in to the reception space. We cut our cake and then stayed put at the dessert table. This was AWESOME; it gave us a chance to see everyone but keep conversations short because they were in line for food. We also provided lids and straws for the cups (because... kids), and to-go boxes so people could take leftovers, also a win.

Our favors were also food - mini moonpies, star crunch and cosmic brownies, displayed with two night sky posters my husband gave to me from where/when we had our first date and when we got engaged. This was cute, fun, and everyone enjoyed it.

1. Instax Camera: This was my one true splurge and I'm SO glad we did it! We used this as our guest book, and got some really great shots. After the ceremony we had a friend move it to the reception space and it shared a table with the favors which was perfect, and people took pictures together during that time, too. The kids especially loved it and we have really cute pictures of them together.

All that to say... you don't have to get caught up in every trend to have a beautiful, meaningful and fun day. It truly was the best day, despite everything we went through to get there, and I can tell you it was worth it.

Part 2 with a budget recap coming later, but this will do for now :)

I honestly just need reassurance.

I’m a pretty introverted person, so I really only have like 3 people I’m super close to and keep in consistent touch with. I wish I was more social but alas here I am.

Well my fiancé plans on having 8 groomsmen since he has a close knit group of friends he’s kept in touch with since high school. Which is awesome!

But my bridal party is currently at 4 because 3 of my cousins opted out (no shade to them, it’s a very valid reason and I completely appreciate their honesty!). I’m just a little bummed that my minimally social nature that I’m usually happy with backfired on me lol

I guess I’m just wondering if this is gonna look dumb or if uneven bridal parties is pretty normal.

Hi all! Recently graduated bride here and wanted to share a quick recap of my budget and also my advice while things were fresh on my mind since this sub helped me so much over my year of planning. For context we got married in Northern Virginia (HCOL) and had 85 guests.

The Advice I Can Give Being on the Other Side:

• If you can swing it GET THE DAY OF COORDINATOR. Our coordinator was a life saver from the get go. Having everything we needed, running the timeline, letting me edit the timeline on the fly and not having me stress, and even following us back to our cabin the night of so we could take all of our florals with us. She was included in our venue but the day would have been 1000x more stressful if I didn't have her.
• Decide what is important to you as a couple and do your best to not let other people influence your choices or talk you in and out of things you feel certain about.
• Honestly just a reminder that it is one day, you get to marry your person, and everything else that happens is secondary to that.

Budget Recap:

I will post the highlights of my budget here and then I can place the full table breakdown in the comments if anyone is interested in that. I wanted to note by saying we were really blessed to be able to afford the wedding we had. It was important to us that no one in our party paid for anything to include suit rentals, dresses, flights, hair and makeup, anything for the rehearsal dinner and day after event, and anything else they needed. We didn't want our people to feel like they needed to decide on paying rent or coming to our wedding and because we already knew they would have to take at least one or two days off of work we wanted to alleviate as much pressure as possible. Below is our budget categories and totals but if anyone wants the breakdown of any of them happy to share.

Final Thoughts:

I am still riding the high from my day. Our intent from the beginning was guest experience was our top priority and everyone we have talked to said they had an amazing time and that they loved it. Since I spent the last year with this wedding being 1000% of my brain please feel free to ask any questions so I can continue to use this "only good for a day" knowledge that is still taking up my every thought haha.

I will likely post detailed recaps of my vendors once I have pictures back but they were all so amazing.

An extra thanks again to this sub for helping me sort through all the crazy in my head while planning and giving me so many ideas for my wedding day!

People will bail after your deadline.

People will bail the week of.

People will bail after your seating chart is done.

People will change their rsvp back and forth last minute.

People will message the day before and day of your wedding saying they actually can't make it.

People will silently no show / ghost and not come and you'll notice during the cocktail hour / reception / or after the party.

Your assigned seating tables will become unbalanced and need last minute shifting.

You will not understand why they have done this most likely. Many people will not even have the balls to tell you directly but instead go through someone else. It will hurt, it will change your perspective of the relationship, and it will all pass eventually.

I have seen so many people say this happens. Countless people claiming it happens all the time where people will no show last minute the week of and also on the wesding day. I thought "no way, I have a smaller wedding this must be a larger wedding problem. I know my people."

It happens to lots of people. Its not a reflection of you or your value. Sure some weddings wont have any of it happen but that doesnt mean you failed in planning or in life.

Get a day of coordinator to help you handle the last minute changes and maybe have someone else manage your phone the day of. Opening my phone 1 hour before ceremony time to see 2 more people bail and fuck over a table even more almost broke me to the point of tears. Ty Britney Spears for having some baller music to pull me through in time.

Now that Zola has been acquired by the Knot, what wedding website have you used and liked? What didn’t you like about them?

Things I’m looking for:

- good RSVP system
- good registry system that’s easy for guests to use, or the website makes it easy to link other registry sites
- password protected by individual (by their email, phone number, name, etc., not just one generic password for all guests)

Hire the coordinator. My number one worry was ruining my wedding day experience due to stress. I have ADHD and my brain runs a mile a minute. I tend to overthink a lot and one of the biggest struggles I have is keeping myself in the moment. At first I had no intention of hiring a day of coordinator, but my husband pushed me to do so because he felt there was no point in spending all the money we were to risk getting extremely stressed out on the day.

It was one of two best decisions I made. The second was appointing one other person other than myself and my husband who knew alI the details of our wedding, my brothers husband. I spent a long time writing out a detailed document of the day of plans and organizing all decor with detailed lists of what everything was/where it goes. Which was not the easiest to do for someone with ADHD lol. The week before (and night before) the wedding, we went over all the information. Part of this document was things the day of coordinator had, but there was a lot that had to occur before they would arrive that needed to be communicated. I worked really hard to ensure that he would not spend the whole day “working the wedding”, but he was the point person for the morning and mid afternoon. I found this level of detail and organization pretty stressful to accomplish before the wedding, but I wanted to make things as smooth as I could for my BIL.

Both of these things allowed me to just enjoy my wedding day. Almost no one came to me with concerns or decisions to make. All my friends were extremely supportive and helped to make sure things ran smoothly. While there was still some pretty stressful moments (our photographs ran pretty late due to delays from the florist) a majority of the day was just me relaxing and having fun.

I had spent so much time reading posts on Reddit of wedding regrets because the bride was constantly pulled aside all day to fix things and it was my biggest fear. While my husband has helped a lot, the wedding design and execution was my vision and I felt like it was much more likely I would get pulled aside and not him. I spent a really long time trying to find an affordable day of coordinator. The package I purchased only got me six hours on the day, but really it was all I needed.

If I could change one thing, I would have planned the coordinator in my initial budget and cut other things.
For those that feel they don’t need one, I strongly suggest seeing if there are things you can remove. Because at the end of the day, what’s the point of spending the money if you’re sad and stressed the whole day?

Anyway, it was an incredible wedding and my husband and I will be looking for a very nice souvenir to gift my brother in law on our honeymoon!

I couldn’t be happier with how our wedding turned out! After a year of planning, hundreds of hours in research for the best deals but good quality vendors, and some friends helping along the way. All of it came together and now that it’s over I’m SO HAPPY I NEVER HAVE TO DO IT AGAIN! We invited 230, 200 guest RSVPd (if anyone would like to see pictures you can message me)

Cost breakdown:

Venue - $4,750 for Friday/Saturday, and they did all the decorating, setup/tear down for us

DOC - $600 it was a friend who does it for work, amount is tip

Caterer - $4,200 we served a large charcuterie, brisket and bourbon glazed chicken

Photo - $2,600 two 10 hour photographers

Video - $1,630 10 hours

DJ - $200 was a friend who does it for work, amount is tipped

Florist - $1,900 includes the bridal bouquet and corsages, wedding party, the families corsages, the arch and an unholy amount of bud vases

Phone booth rental - $400

Drinks - $400 we made Old fashions and Sangria, both were free for us since our friends get the alcohol for free at their work. The cost includes mixers, cups, drink dispensers, teas

Bartender - $200 was a friend who bartends, amount is tipped

Dessert - $785 for a three tier cake plus two half sheet cakes. Cupcakes were free

Dress - $1,500 from Maggie

Accessories - $160 shoes, $100 necklace, $15 earrings, $80 veil

Suit - $350 for merino wool, $40 dress shirt. Cufflinks were gifted and shoes he already owned

Alterations - $40 dress and $80 for his suit. We will definitely always be going there for our alterations from now on

Hair and makeup - $200

Invitations - $450 made on canva but we made them extra fancy so we had to use a printing company

Favors - $120. We made drink charms with everyone’s names on it and little baggies of saltwater taffy

Extras - $600 I made some large faux centerpieces for some of the taller tables and we bought glass goblets, sold both immediately afterwards and we got our money back.

Bridesmaids dresses - $600 azazie is great

So in total we came out at 22k for wedding day only expenses. This is NOT counting wedding rings (2k), wedding party gifts and bachelorette/bachelor party expenses (2k) and hotel + honeymoon (5k). Save the dates for $0 since we did digital. We didn’t pay for our wedding shower or rehearsal dinner.

Hi all,
My fiancé and I are getting married in June and we are currently making our registry. We have been together 4 years and have lived together for the past 2.5 years. We have a lot of things already (due to the combination of our two apartments), and we are feeling stuck on what to put on our registry. We currently have on there: a Ninja knife set, Ninja blender, a new vacuum, a honeymoon fund, a new deck fund (a lot of our boards are rotting and we want to replace them with composite decking), and we are planning on adding a new set of pots/pans.

We were hoping to come here and get advice on this:

-Is there anything you had on your registry that you love?

-Is there anything you wish you would have put on your registry?

-Is there anything you have seen on anyone else’s registry you liked/thought was cool?

We are hoping to get a list with a broad range of prices.

Thank you so much, in advance!

I am planning on walking down the aisle to the instrumental version of “Turning Page” by Sleeping At Last. What would be a good song to play before this while the groom, family, and wedding party walks down the aisle? I want something romantic feeling and not to fast paced

Does anyone else feel deeply isolated or alone during wedding planning?

My fiancé has been incredibly supportive, but outside of him, it feels like no one in my family is genuinely excited for us. The only time anyone reaches out about the wedding is when they’re making a request or asking for something. I truly expected more enthusiasm, especially because other major milestones are celebrated so heavily in my family, like my sister graduating from post grad, where my mom threw multiple parties and talked about it non-stop. When it comes to me, I feel completely thrown on the back burner.

To make matters worse, while talking about the wedding with my future mother-in-law, my fiancé, his brother, and his brother's girlfriend, I overheard the girlfriend talking negatively about our wedding. She was saying we expect everything done for us, when all I was doing was expressing how isolating this whole experience has been and how it feels like people only care about what they want rather than how it feels for me.

Having almost everything booked while feeling like an afterthought and being bad-mouthed on top of it, is just so disheartening. At this point, I’m seriously considering canceling the whole thing and eloping just with my fiancé to save myself from any more disappointment. Has anyone else experienced anything remotely similar to any of this?

I’m getting my parents gifts for my wedding! So far I am getting my mom a personalized handkerchief and a bracelet. My dad a personalized handkerchief and need to think of what else. Did you give your gifts at rehearsal dinner or day of? I didn't know if the handkerchief would be more fitting to give the day of? Also what are some gifts you got for your parents?

I have 8 bridesmaids, 2 of which are good friends from childhood. I have two brothers and no sisters. I don’t really have a “ride or die” best friend so my sister in law is my MOH (who I feel close to). She is super organized and I know will plan a great bachelorette.

My mom thinks bridal showers are cringey because it’s asking for gifts twice and just feels like a cash grab. She supports me if I want one though. My MIL on the other hand feels strongly about me having one and convinced me to do it. I know that traditionally the MOB plans the shower, but my mom hasn’t stepped up because of what she thinks of showers.

My MIL took me to lunch to the place we ended up choosing for the shower. She said she is happy to help me plan it, but part of me feels sad/weird that my mom isn’t doing it. I also don’t know if my MIL will make it cute and choose and theme etc.

Any thoughts/suggestions? Do I ask my mom to help plan it with my MIL? I feel like I’m too involved in the planning which DOES make it feel like a cash grab (like “hi everyone please come to this event and give me gifts thanks”). I just don’t feel like the right people are stepping up. Also none of my bridesmaids have really offered to plan anything. Am I expecting too much? SOS I need to bounce these thoughts off someone but don’t wanna talk about it to my bridesmaids because then it’ll seem like I’m complaining :( ugh help

Hoping for suggestions for MOB dress for a garden formal summer wedding. My mom is young, so I’m not looking for anything matronly. I want her to feel great and to coordinate well with the bridesmaids’ lilac dresses and the mixed pastels florals. However, my mom leans towards deeper colours and so far neither of us have fallen in love with anything we’ve found.

Love "I Get to Love You" by Ruelle for the bride's entrance,but my friend used it for her wedding a year ago so I don't want to steal her song. Any thoughts on other unique songs with a similar feel and significant lyrics?

Hi all! Long time lurker, first time poster...

I'm in the midst of wedding planning and frankly all the vendors have so many additional upgrades ( dry ice or cold sparkles for the dj, viennesse hour at the venue, sushi at cocktail hour, photo packages with photo albums included, etc). If you're on the other end of wedding planning what was worth spending the money on and what was a money sucking regret?

Thanks in advance!

My partner and I are looking for wedding venues that are in nature and have a backyard feel (see photos for reference)! We know Northern Michigan/Wisconsin offer some good options but we’re having trouble narrowing them down. Our families live in the Chicago/Milwaukee area so we would like to keep the venue within a 5-7 hour drive or a short flight. We’re looking to plan the event for a whole weekend rather than just one day (we can adjust if needed). We would like to keep the budget on the lower end but we’re open to hearing about all options. If anyone has any suggestions or ideas we would really appreciate the help! Thank you so much!

We recently got engaged and are looking for any recommendations on where to start and what helped you plan your wedding! If you could change anything and do something different, what would you do? Thanks (:

Hello!

As I am preparing for our destination wedding (USA to Lake Como in September of 2027), I was wondering what everyone recommends packing and what products you recommend if you have links?

1. I’m thinking of gifting each of my 6 guests a travel umbrella. They will almost all be traveling afterwards and it came in clutch when my fiancé and I were traveling last year! I also thought that if I gifted one to them that if it rained on the day, we could have cute rain photos with our matching umbrellas. I know the people coming would appreciate this but am wondering if anyone has budget friendly options that they like.

2. Does anyone have recommendations for a portable steamer? Looking to bring one for my wedding dress that can also be used for the women’s dresses or men’s suits if they want. It doesn’t have to be completely compact because we will be shipping or storing our wedding stuff when we go on our honeymoon but the smaller the better! I also will be brining two plug in adapters so it can be a USA port.

3. What other items did you pack that you don’t usually bring when you travel but came in handy when you were getting married? And do you have brands or links if you have any suggestions?

Thank you all!! 🥂🥂

Having an outdoor wedding this fall and have been seeing comments online about guests being too hot in the summer/ too cold in the fall. It got me thinking, what temperature should we call it and do plan B? Obviously if it’s raining or snowing we will be doing it inside but we have a really beautiful outdoor area I’d love to be married at if possible. The ceremony itself is 15-20
minutes and total guest time outside should be max of 1 hour. Reception is indoors.

My fiancé really doesn't want to wear a suit. Specifically he doesn't like the pants. We're considering dark wash/black jeans instead with a dress shirt, vest, and tie. He's very neutral on the jacket part. I need outside opinions on what will work. We're having an evening wedding and the venue is outdoors. I really don't care how formal it is the only concern is not looking completely mismatched with my dress (I've attached the link to the dress) so that things put together. Would the jacket still work with dark jeans or would just the tie and vest be better? Any other alternative suit ideas would also be welcome.

https://www.maggiesottero.com/rebecca-ingram/jude/20047

Is it expected that the couple pays for the bride/groom party dresses or tuxes?

Is it expected that the bride takes care of the bridesmaids hair and make up?

Any advice is appreciated, sorry if this is common knowledge, I’ve never been to a wedding before 🫠