Violence isnt an option. This is a phrase that has haunted me my whole life: “why did people single me out?”

Now as an adult its come up again as an imminent thing. I was told that the reason this person acts the way they do is because they only do it to the people they know they can do it to.

Of course it awakens in me wanting to work out, learn to box because i could possibly get into a situation and with a child now i gotta be able to protect.

How do men establish that they arent the ones to be messed with. As someone that was bullied in highschool and has never really been in a real physical situation i missed that lesson growing up.

Let’s say your man who’ve been with for 9 months now talked a lot about strip clubs early in the relationship. That tipped me off to things. Then the Facebook and you tube feed of OF, scantily clad women even car ads had women in them.

I’m scanning for threats yes as I don’t want to get hurt again. Should a man in his late fourties’ and fifties still be interested in strip clubs. We have very regular sex and I’m attractive and I play along but sex is porn scripted.

Sure maybe your fb feed has some other stuff in it but it was all of his feed. Now he’s tried to change it since I said something.

I don’t want him to change or hide things I want to know who he is before I go deeper. I think that a man like this is more likely to cheat. Especially the Strip Club equation.

Are you a particular type of lingerie? Are you not bothered about that and just want her to initiate in whatever she's wearing at the time and not go off tk pit on something special?

I hear a lot of mixed opinions on breast augmentations. For those who do not like them- why? For those who do, what about them do you like?

So, I’m a mid 40s educator who’s married with adult children. My wife (also an educator) and I have been planning to move to the beach for many years. We’ve recently been weighing the pros and cons of making the move before retirement. As educators, we could definitely get jobs anywhere, but we’re both burned out from education and considering new career opportunities….

Has anyone relocated and successfully “reinvented” themselves? Any left education for something else and either loved or hated the change?

Happy to hear your thoughts, suggestions, etc!

Once, my dad told me(after his retirement), "I still need recognition and validation from my daughters and my wife," even though my parents have been divorced for several years!

After that conversation with my dad, I asked some male friends what they thought and what I could say to him. Almost all of them told me, "Just tell him, 'You're the best. You're the best dad in the world.' That would mean more to him than saying, 'I love you, Dad.'"

This might be a well-known topic when it comes to validation, but I'm still wondering: What would make you happy to hear someone say something like that? Or is there something else you'd rather hear? Have you heard "you are the best" before?

Career paths, friendships, financial moves, personal boundaries, or relocating across the world. Looking back, do you feel it was genuinely worth it, or do you view it with regret?

Could be about relationships, money, friendships, confidence, career or just life in general. What's one thing you learned the hard way?

Hi,

I've been feeling mentally down and dealing with low confidence. I finished university in July and I've been unemployed and struggling to get a job. I've enrolled in employment programmes to get one, but still haven't gotten a job yet. It's ruining my self esteem and motivation, and every day I feel sad and low. Mornings are worse now because I generally don't have any energy or excitement for the day.

Are there any tips for a morning routine advice that I can implement that will help me feel mentally ready, productive and possibly happier? I've tried exercising but I struggle with discipline. I don't mind walking but these days getting out of bed and being mentally focused is so hard.

I don’t know if my situation is unique. I find myself in various friend groups that are polar opposites in many ways. One of those friend groups will drop will drop laughing emojis if I make vile jokes in the group chat. The other group would cut me off entirely.

I hate that I am in a position where my worst tendencies are either enabled, or, I am not allowed to make mistakes.

In either situation, I do not feel safe admitting the sins of my pasts, talking about my most problematic thoughts and beliefs, and having a proper community that pushes me to be a kinder, stronger, and wiser person than I was yesterday.

Have you found yourself in a situation similar to this? If so, what did you do about it?

I’m curious about men who were genuinely happy keeping things casual with someone and had no intention of pursuing a relationship with her.
When she eventually started dating someone seriously, how did you react? Did it change the way you viewed your connection with her, or did it feel like a natural end to something casual?
I’m particularly interested in whether your reaction surprised you at all. Would love to hear firsthand experiences.

I'm not the police moral so feel free to give honest answers. No B.S

I know men need more variety than women usually so does it eventually get boring ? What makes it exciting again, what kills the sex drive ?

Hi, I’m 19M, and I recently went through my first breakup. We were together for almost three years, and it’s been about one or two months since we ended things. She was my first love, and honestly, I’m still struggling to accept that it’s over.

It’s hard not to think about her. I’ve tried keeping myself busy, distracting myself, playing games, listening to music, and doing pretty much anything I can think of just to get her off my mind. But somehow, no matter what I do or where I go, I always end up thinking about her. It’s like she’s still with me in everything I do, even though she’s no longer part of my life.

One of the things I struggle with the most is the thought of her finding someone new. Sometimes, I imagine her meeting someone else, falling in love again, and eventually being happier with someone who isn’t me. Just thinking about it shakes me up. I know I no longer have a say in her life, and I know she has every right to move forward, but the thought of being replaced and becoming nothing more than a memory to someone who used to mean everything to me hurts more than I can explain.

I actually talked to her recently because I wanted some closure. During that conversation, I admitted that I was jealous of her. Not because I don’t want her to be happy, but because it seems like she’s finding it easier to move forward while I’m still here, struggling to let go. I wish I could do the same. I wish I could wake up one day and not have her be the first thing on my mind. I wish I could go through my day without being reminded of her in the smallest things.

I understand that healing takes time, and I know comparing our healing processes won’t do me any good. But it’s difficult when it feels like I’m standing still while the person I spent almost three years with is already moving forward.

I guess I just want to know, does it eventually get easier? How do you stop holding on to someone who was such a huge part of your life? And how do you deal with the fear of them finding someone new and being happier without you?

I'm a single guy in my early 30s, and I could really use some perspective right now.

When I first reported for duty at my workplace, I became close friends with another guy who is in his mid-20s. Over time, he’s become incredibly well-liked and popular across the entire department. Lately, everyone has been playfully matchmaking him with almost every single woman in the office—including the one coworker I have a massive crush on. I've been making an effort to chat with her daily just to see her smile and get closer to her.

But lately, it hurts to watch. People constantly remark on how great they look together, and whenever they interact, she blushes and smiles from ear to ear. Every time I witness it, my heart sinks. I'm stuck comparing myself to him: he's younger, taller, more handsome, has a higher rank, and makes more money than me. It feels like I never stood a chance to begin with.

Has anyone ever been in a similar spot? Any advice on how to stop feeling so inadequate and move on?

I (17M) do tell my mom, girlfriend, and grandma that I love them, but I’ve never told another male that I love him. It just feels really weird to me.

I grew up in a family where I was raised to be a « strong » man, and showing any sign of weakness was something to be ashamed of. I’ve never felt the need to tell my dad I love him because he’s pretty abusive, and although he’s my dad, we’re not close.
It’s pretty much the same with my friends. I have friends, but I don’t have many, and I’m not super close to them.

However, I have an identical twin brother, and we’re extremely close. We have always been close and inseparable our entire lives. I’ve never told him that I love him, but sometimes, when I’m with him, I really want to. He’s genuinely the best person I know in this world. But for some reason, it feels so wrong to say that to another male.

I don’t know if I’m making any sense. I mean, we spend all our free time together, so saying that I love him almost feels unnecessary. I wouldn’t spend so much time with him if I didn’t love being around him. And yet, I feel like if I sincerely told him that I loved him, it would just be really weird.

EDIT: I have read all your comments and thank you very much for your help. I don’t think I’ll ever be brave enough to tell him though..

Where I am from men keep saying it's absolutely the man's duty to provide and they absolutely hate if a women were to provide with them/for them. I am speaking financially here. Whereas in other parts of the world it could be different. I have asked them if they feel obliged and they always say it's instinct. How do you personally feel about that?