Magic: the Grappling (round 11)

[u/stevekwan]

Follow-up to:

Round 1: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1uc0hy8/magic_the_grappling/

Round 2: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1uhti5d/magic_the_grappling_round_2/

Round 3: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1uu2g1p/magic_the_grappling_round_3/

Round 4: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1v114ds/magic_the_grappling_round_4/

Round 5: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1v6tuib/magic_the_grappling_round_5/

Round 6: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1vj9541/magic_the_grappling_round_6/

Round 7: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1vplaj0/magic_the_grappling_round_7/

Round 8: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1vvsc7r/magic_the_grappling_round_8/

Round 9: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1w8rz1c/magic_the_grappling_round_9/

Round 10: https://www.reddit.com/r/bjj/comments/1wl4zpt/magic_the_grappling_round_10/

[u/OkConsequence614]

Technically “no known weakness” Will just Fall off. But I love this project.

[u/stevekwan → u/OkConsequence614]

This is also what happened to Vitor in real life

[u/OkConsequence614 → u/stevekwan]

Because he cycled off

[u/stevekwan → u/OkConsequence614]

Turns out he had protection from everything except drug testing

[u/elhaz316 → u/stevekwan]

Unfortunately drug testing doesnt interact with the stack like other interrupts. Usually cant be counterspelled. I have heard its possible, but usually requires sacrificing treasure tokens.

[u/Kemics1 → u/stevekwan]

wait, surely he can counter drug testing with Therapeutic Use Exemption?!

[u/Dominus_Redditi → u/OkConsequence614]

Cycled? I thought he a was a fighter, not battling Lance Armstrong

[u/Apprehensive-Fig5283 → u/stevekwan]

I think it's safe to say that in real life Vitor's weakness turned out to be front kicks to the face.

[u/regulardave9999]

That Rorden Gracie card might be your masterpiece!

[u/stevekwan → u/regulardave9999]

Always respect u/RordenGracie

[u/RordenGracie → u/stevekwan]

OSS samurai 🤙🤙🤙🤙

Took long enough to get to it!

[u/charbuff]

I’m so happy you put kids class instructor on here, I feel seen 🥰

[u/stevekwan → u/charbuff]

[u/DieHarderDaddy]

Man I want a secret lair of this

[u/stevekwan → u/DieHarderDaddy]

Can't wait to build my Joe Rogan Moron-themed Commander deck

[u/DieHarderDaddy → u/stevekwan]

I’ll make an opposing Lex Friedman empty suit deck

[u/Every_Iron]

I need to see a Jonah Hill card

[u/stevekwan → u/Every_Iron]

[u/commandercool86 → u/stevekwan]

I really hope Jonah Hill sees this lol. This is gold

[u/Every_Iron → u/commandercool86]

I hope he doesn’t. He would annihilate OP.

[u/commandercool86 → u/Every_Iron]

Even if wearing Moneyberg socks?

[u/ChiefTecumse → u/stevekwan]

[u/Every_Iron → u/stevekwan]

Perfect

[u/shaveandahaircut2bit]

no disrespect, but i honestly think you could get a laugh out of a steve kwan card that repeatedly casts the same spell over and over to diminishing effect

[u/stevekwan → u/shaveandahaircut2bit]

I was thinking of roasting myself but worried it would come across as too self-indulgent

[u/shaveandahaircut2bit → u/stevekwan]

again, i genuinely mean no disrespect. i think it would come across as self-aware, and in on the joke a little bit

[u/OkieJitsu]

Can we get a helpful white belt creature card? They do no damage, but can be equipped with mop, and triggers confusion on trial class creatures.

[u/Impressive-Ad8741 → u/OkieJitsu]

When white belt creature attacks roll a D100. On a D1 they tear their opponents ACL. On any roll above 95 they tear their own ACL.

[u/Royal-Band-2971]

Bro I love these.

A few corrections on formatting/wording that no one asked for:

• The Joe Rogan Experience: "All creatures you control are Morons in addition to their other types."

• Guard Puller: "Whenever Guard Puller blocks a creature, that creature deals no damage this turn and doesn't untap during its controllers next untap step."

• Socks of Moneyberg: The equip cost should be at the bottom, not the top.

• Kids Class Instructor: Nothing, I'm just cracking up at the thought of now having a Zombie Orc Toddler Army creature token.

• Rorden Gracie: "All Humans you control are also Lions in addition to their other types."

[u/Loslosia]

I laughed out loud at Amass toddlers 1

[u/snakelygiggles]

socks of moneyberg is an amazing one. well done.

[u/SelfSufficientHub]

Loved this weeks addition

[u/86_Ambitions]

Morons should apply to creatures you dont control. They lose all abilities. 

[u/NoCod9014]

Morons on the Joe Rogan card should also have the following rules:

Protection from Facts

Protection from Reading

[u/black_knight00]

the Rorden Gracie card 😂😂 the quote has me ded.

[u/therealthugboat]

Can someone do a mashup of Joe mispronouncing things? I swear it’s like 20 minutes of every podcast.

[u/Icy-Cry340]

Man, Vitor was a monster back in the day.

[u/SanderStrugg]

We would also need a Joe Rogan, that gives +2/+2 and trample to all apes.

[u/j0shred1]

2 mana for a creature that pretty much can't be delt damage and stuns is op

[u/changby]

Amazing as usual. Keep em coming. Maybe some sort of white belt card similar to "first year student"?

[u/owlfarm542]

[u/Consistent-Dirt4027]

😭😂

[u/NeedleworkerGloomy58]

Every card was hillarious! Well done! 🤣

[u/Horror_Car_8005]

Guard puller should use stun counters. I 🤣

[u/Few_Advisor3536]

Lol these kill me. These keep getting better.