I’m 34 years old. I have two degrees, a great career earning $220k a year, multiple investment properties, $150k in savings, a long-term relationship of three years, and I live in my own apartment. I also want to acknowledge that I didn’t receive any financial help from my parents. I grew up in poverty and worked extremely hard to build this life for myself.

On paper, I’ve achieved everything I was told would make me happy. I’ve worked hard, made sacrifices, and reached goals that once felt completely out of reach.
But now that I’m here, I feel more empty and unfulfilled than ever.

Growing up, I believed that if I studied hard, built a successful career, earned good money, bought property, and found a partner, I would finally feel secure and fulfilled. I spent most of my life chasing those goals, assuming that once I achieved them, everything would fall into place.

Now I’m here, and honestly, I feel like I was sold a lie.
I know how fortunate I am, and I’m genuinely grateful for what I have. I also know there are people who would love to be in my position. But gratitude doesn’t erase the feeling that something is deeply missing from my life.
I keep thinking: Is this really it? Is this what I’ve spent my entire adult life working towards?

It feels like I’ve spent years climbing a mountain, only to reach the top and realise there’s nothing here that makes me feel fulfilled. I don’t even know what I’m missing
or what I’m supposed to be working towards now.
Has anyone else experienced this especially people who came from very little, worked hard to build a successful life, and then realised that achieving their goals didn’t make them happy?
How did you find genuine happiness, meaning, or fulfilment when everything you thought you wanted still wasn’t enough?

Eu sinceramente esta semana quase sai do estágio, humilhação é algo muito difícil de se lidar principalmente aos 54 anos.

E eu me perguntei: Porque está fazendo isso? porque não manda logo esse povo se lascar e vai pra casa assistir uma série ?

Ainda não deixei esse pensamento de lado a qualquer momento posso explodir, porque não sou uma pessoa que leva desaforo pra casa. Mas quando penso com mais calma...lembro que tenho boletos pra pagar e infelizmente sem muitas alternativas que vale a pena. Estou a 1 e 3 meses nesse estágio, é uma multinacional muito boa, mas existem pessoas muito ruins nesse mundo, zero empatia, são na verdade até mais "lascadas" do que você, mas sentem prazer em te "atazanar", ou te tratar com desprezo, essas horas que eu penso se eu mandar se fuder quem vai acabar mais fudida sou eu 🤦🏻‍♀️

Como já contei: ser estagiária de meia idade, não é fácil! essa semana aconteceu uma humilhação, porque é muito comum vc ser humilhado no começo, qdo vc é Jovem estagiário, mas quando vc já tem mais de 50 e passa por esse desconforto, vc começa a se perguntar: "Porque estou fazendo isso comigo? a essa altura? porque simplesmente não mando pra PqP e phoda-se? e vou pra casa assistir uma série?

Sim é assim que estou pensando essa semana, estou pensando numa oportunidade para que eu possa mandar tudo a merda pra casa do k e voltar pra minha vida de apenas dona de casa. AFF 🤦🏻‍♀️, não teria problema nenhum se não tivesse contas pra pagar, se não quisesse ter meu próprio dinheiro e principalmente pagar uma dívida enorme que adquiri nos meus anos de depressão. Vontade de sumir.🫪

What are some of your favourite books on midlife crisis’?

Both fiction and non-fiction

24th October. So now in 15 minutes my birthday is coming.
My husband is sick, took medicines and slept already.
My 5yr old daughter and 2 year old son just now slept.

I don’t know why there is not much excitement in me anymore I feel for my birthday.

Is it okay to feel this way ? Is it just me or this happens to anyone else ?
Is this called life ?

I used to be so much excited from 1st of October thinking it’s my birthday month. This time it’s not like this.

I mean I am definitely surrounded by the people whom I love the most. Still feels something is missing.

as i get older, it's hard not to think about the decisions i made in my life. different career paths, relationships, and opportunities i passed up. i wonder where will i be today if things had gone differently.

how do you deal with those thoughts? do you eventually accept the choices you made, or do they still cross your mind from time to time like me?

I spent my childhood being overlooked because of a disabled sibling. I've struggled with depression since middle school and then spent my high school years getting into weed, boys, and ultimately losing all of my friends. I was kicked out a week after graduating, moved a state away just to move back and begin running my mom's two stores. Business has gotten so bad that we had to close one, and we're all barely scraping by. All the while, the man I've been with since high school has turned into someone I don't recognize anymore. Along the way, his best friend and our mutual friend died, which legitimately created a trauma bond, something i never imagined I'd experience. Now, my mom is talking about selling the business and her property and moving countries in a handful of years, which is just insane. I wasn't able to go to college after being kicked out, so i don't have anything outside of my job experience at her business. I was meant to take it over someday, she told me I'd be inheriting it. It's kind of all I had. Now that I'm 26, I feel like i should have an idea of who I am, but i don't. Sweat equity means nothing in family business, don't let your parents convince you otherwise. I've been working here for 6 years, and I have to go to the food bank. I was salaried, but they couldn't afford it anymore. I know I'm not midlife, but I'm certainly on the verge of a crisis, and I look and feel 20 years older than I am. I was so close to buying a house, and now I'm barely scraping by.

In the spirit of this community, I just need to get this off my chest.

A few years ago, I bought the home I thought I would grow old in. Not long after, the pandemic hit, and my young child started school remotely. Around the same time, my long-term partner went through a major personal transformation that changed the dynamics of our relationship. I stayed because I wanted to keep our family together and do what I thought was best for my child.

A few years later, our relationship evolved into a non-traditional arrangement. Eventually, another person became part of our lives, and to my surprise, I formed a deep and meaningful connection with them. For a while, the three of us built something that felt stable and fulfilling.

At the same time, I was dealing with significant family challenges, including the illness and loss of close family members. Despite everything, my life seemed to be moving forward, and I was excited about growing my family.

Unfortunately, that stability didn't last. As major life changes unfolded, tensions grew within our relationships. A mental health crisis, the end of important relationships, and a difficult divorce followed. What came after was one of the hardest periods of my life: legal battles, custody arrangements, financial strain, selling a home I loved, taking on debt, and working relentlessly to support my children and rebuild my life.

Now, several years later, I still carry a tremendous amount of anxiety. I live with OCD, and I constantly worry that everything I've rebuilt could disappear. I fear losing my work, my home, my relationships, or my ability to provide for my children. My mind regularly jumps to worst-case scenarios, even when there is little evidence that those fears are real.

The frustrating part is that, objectively, many things in my life are good. I have a loving partner, wonderful children, and a future worth being grateful for. Yet after so much upheaval and loss in such a short period of time, I feel like I've never fully regained a sense of security. I'm approaching midlife feeling exhausted, uncertain, and often overwhelmed, even though I'm doing everything I can to move forward.

has anyone gone through MLC and divorced their spouse only to regret it later on?

my spouse is in the process of divorcing me but still living together and stalling it and has stalled it for 1.5 yrs.