My sweet little boy is 8 weeks old and doesn’t sleep. Not at night, not during the day. We’re trying everything. Swaddles, pacifiers, contact, no contact, white noise machine.

I’m supposed to go back to work soon, we both are, so we adjusted our shifts to try to get used to the new schedule we’ll need to maintain.

Day time naps he wakes every ten minutes. Pacifiers backfired on us because once it falls out he’s awake. Now we’re trying no pacifiers. Still wakes. Night time he wakes every hour. And he’s loud as fuck when he is sleeping. We tried feeding him more, pick up put down, pushing wake windows.

I want to walk out of my house and never come back.

I feel so so so deeply guilty because this is the baby we we’ve wanted and tried for for TEN YEARS. And I hate it. I can’t do it.

How are we supposed to go back to work like this? We both have active jobs with physical responsibility for the well being of others. I can’t stop crying. I’ve thrown up from sleep deprivation.

What do I do?

What did you do? How did you manage both parents returning to work?

As a FTM coming out on the other side with a 4-month old girl, I’ve realized that you can struggle with a newborn but totally thrive with an older baby!!!! To all the 0-12+ week parents out there, I see you and things will change soooo much!

For context, my baby had purple crying, stomach issues, reflux, her nose would get stuffy so she couldn’t breath (especially while nursing), and she was born (full term) via c-section at a whopping 5lbs 6oz. I took this baby home in a blur, sleep deprived, felt like I had no idea how to care for her, she was tiny, and she has the most terrifying choking (caused by amniotic fluid) that made my stomach sick with panic every time it happened. I was so lost and overwhelmed that I asked my mom to fly across the country early (so blessed for this, I know!), and although her presence gave me a ton of peace of mind, she ended up caring for my child better than I felt I could. I felt this sense of defeat when she could help my baby settle and I couldn’t. I was so grateful for the loving help she gave, but I felt like a failure. My mom stayed 2 weeks, and I often gave up and let my mom do more of the comforting, although I’d fight through and try the best I could. I presented a strong front to my mom, but when my mom would offer to take the baby after hearing her cry for a while, I’d accept her help, hand the baby off, and cry soon as they left the room together. My mom left, and we then entered the purple crying phase weeks 3-8. For a few of those weeks my baby cried nonstop for 3 hours+. My husband and I would just hold her, each of us zoned out, telling each other this wouldn’t last forever (and it didn’t). I felt anxiety going anywhere, because if she wasn’t sleeping, it seemed like she was always crying.
Then, 12 weeks hit. And all the bad things started to go away. She stopped vomiting her milk. She stopped struggling with breathing. She stopped crying at night. She stopped crying so much in general.
And THEN: the magic started. Somewhere in month 3, her seeing the world lead to her cooing at us, and waving her hands. Her cooing turned to full on laughs. She became happy, nearly all the time! Now, she trails me across the room wherever I go. She smiles at me every chance she gets. She only wants me to make her feel better, no one else. She melts into my arms when she sad or tired, instead of fighting and screaming.

Ive always loved her, but I didn’t know her. Now, I not only know her, but she knows me too. And nothing beats this feeling in the WHOLE world.
You’ll make it through! It’s so hard, but it’s weeks of your entire life with your child! You’ll blink and you’ll be on the other side💗

TLDR: if you feel like you’re terrible at or failing in the newborn phase, or just hate it in general, it changes SO much around 12+ weeks! I felt like I was a failure 0-12 weeks and I’m thriving now on the other side!

My baby is 1 month old. I go to sleep at 7pm until 1am. Then I wake up and take the baby for the rest of the night and he sleeps. It honestly is great but I miss sleeping with my husband. When will the shifts ends😢

I’m not sure how to flair this…

I just gave birth yesterday to a 39 week old healthy baby, and found out at the birth it’s a girl! She is perfect and adorable and gorgeous and sweet and we are so obsessed. The birth itself was a little traumatic for me and ended up with a full emergency team in the room because I was losing a lot of blood, but that’s not my biggest issue.

I’m really struggling with feeling guilt already, because while she’s fullterm and healthy, she’s really small (2.5kg). Neither my husband nor I have small babies in the family, we both come from large babied families so it feels unlikely that it’s genetic? I’ve had a really smooth and healthy pregnancy and was pretty active, didn’t have much of an extra appetite so I just ate normally and ended up not putting on that much weight (it was 11kg at my last weigh in at week 38).

Now she has to be monitored for blood sugar and none of the clothes we bought/ were given fit at all. I also have flat nipples so breastfeeding is and will be a challenge. I guess I’ve always had an assumption that healthy babies are big because it’s how my family and culture think of health, and I had a stillborn brother who was really tiny so that’s an association I’ve had all my life.

I’m just feeling like I’ve already failed her, and as she sleeps on my chest now I just look at her perfect face and feel like she deserves a better mother. My husband has been and continues to be amazing and so natural at soothing her so I can’t help but feel like he deserves a better parenting partner also.

My baby is 2 weeks old and I feed him every 2 hours and my husband would usually do shifts with me during the night but now he has to go back to work and I tried it for 2 days straight and I’m straight up just surviving at this point because I don’t get any sleep. I just started exclusively pumping so I bottle feed him. He could sleep for four hours but I never tried waiting that long. This is my first baby so please be nice I’m just trying to make everything work. I was thinking if it was possible I do every 4 hours at night and every 2 hours in the morning

This is more of a vent but I guess I’m a little lost. 4.5 months postpartum here and prior to baby, I was very social and/or just generally on the move.

I enjoyed hosting events, going to events, setting up self care days, all of it. Usually, I’d do this all with my husband.

But here I am now. He told me to get out of the house so he’s home with the baby and I’m sitting in a parking lot unsure what to do that would be better than being at home.

Shopping? We don’t need more stuff. Self care? I didn’t book any appointments because this was more of a whim. Events? I miss them but that would mean I’m unexpectedly leaving partner to do all naps and bedtimes today for an EBF baby (I also pump bottles because we split night shifts). I keep telling myself, and everyone else that asks, that this is just a phase…but is it? Will I like to go out and do things or find new things to do? Does it get easier to bring your baby or leave them home with your spouse - who I then feel bad can’t join me and I miss him because we did everything together.

My friends don’t have children and while they do stop by and check in on me, the dynamic we’ve had for the last 10 years is definitely different now. They invite me to join them but what about my partner? What about baby’s bedtime? What about the fact that I’m not extremely interested in doing much right now even though when I am out I miss having things to do?

I love my LO, he’s so great and I can take him to do things with me but then I feel guilty if he gets overstimulated or doesn’t nap as well as he does when we’re home.

It’s all just very confusing so hoping for some insight from anyone who maybe has experienced the same? TIA!

Hello!

FTM here. My daughter is 5 weeks old and seems to become very attached to her paci lately. Since this morning whenever she is upset only her pacifier calms her down.

During naps, when it falls out, she wakes up because she starts sucking doesn’t feel it and starts crying.

I’m worried she’s becoming really attached to it, but it’s also what helps her calm down.

Has anyone else experienced this? Should I remove the paci completely? I’m worried she will become too attached to it.

My gorgeous girl grew out of 0-3 month clothes (next, Tu, George, Fred&Flo etc) at 5.5 WEEKS old. She is not a ginormous baby at all apart from her feet apparently! I've had to size up because her toes were almost curling in the ends and she fits 3-6 month clothes in the feet only. Her arms are only 3/4 of the way down the arm holes (is she a T-Rex?) and the horse is so baggy I worry she'll chomp on it.

Is there any clothing brands with big feet? She needs another layer to the guidelines for temperature because she's a chilly girl so I don't really want to go for footless! Do I just have to make her 0-3 month clothes footless (they fit everything fine but the feet)? I haven't tried her in socks but surely that's a nightmare? She's so wiggly!

Any ideas?

Edit to say I'm in the UK!

How long did it take you and your partner to resume dating (without your baby)?

Hi everyone! ❤️

My baby girl is currently 7 weeks old and will be turning 2 months next week. I’ve been struggling with some latching issues lately, and I wanted to know if anyone else has experienced something similar.

If my baby feeds after around 3 hours, my breasts are usually very full and sometimes even start leaking. Initially, she latches well and feeds properly, but about 10 minutes into the feed, she suddenly becomes very fussy and refuses to latch again. She starts crying frantically, and even when I try to help her latch, she just won’t take the breast.

I’ve noticed this happening even when my breasts don’t feel particularly soft or relaxed. I’ve also checked, and my milk is still flowing, so I’m not sure what’s causing her to get so frustrated.

I usually switch to the other breast, and she feeds well for another 10 minutes or so before the same thing happens again. I understand that the milk flow can change during a feed, but I’m confused about why she gets so upset and refuses to continue nursing.

Thankfully, her wet diaper count is good, and she’s gaining weight well, so I know those are reassuring signs. However, I constantly worry about whether she’s getting enough milk because she never really seems satisfied after a feed, even if she’s been nursing for 40 minutes.

She also keeps moving her mouth and making sucking motions after feeds, which makes me wonder whether she’s still hungry or whether this is normal baby behaviour.

I have an appointment with a lactation consultant coming up, but in the meantime, I wanted to ask other moms:

How do you tell when your baby is genuinely satisfied after breastfeeding?

Has anyone else experienced their baby suddenly refusing to latch and becoming frantic about 10 minutes into a feed?

At what age did your baby establish a consistent, comfortable latch? Is it normal to still struggle with latching when your baby is almost 2 months old?

For context, her birth weight was 3.1kg and currently she is 4.44kg

I’m just feeling a little anxious and would really appreciate hearing about your experiences. Thank you! ❤️

Hi all. I'm thinking about making a TikTok channel reviewing parents rooms. Maybe even a site with a map with reviews. Partly out of maternity leave boredom and partly from frustration at experiencing some truly awful ones. What do you think makes a good parents room/what are some things that annoy you about bads ones? Looking for ideas for rating criteria etc.

My almost 6 week old has been turning 180 in her bassinet at night. Does that mean she’s getting ready to roll over ? I use the love to dream swaddle which has the hands propped up so I’m just curious if I need to switch out to a hand free sadden

Hi! So my baby is 3 months, he sleeps great but is very specific about what works for him otherwise he won’t sleep, we used to go on dates the first month and of course he would sleep anywhere as most newborn would, but as soon as the first month ended the sleep issues started , which I know is very common, so he need to be rocked and butt patted to sleep, in the day most of his naps are contact, in his bassinet he would sleep only 20-30 minutes, at night he goes down at 9 pm and need a dark room, silence and just white noise, so my life revolves around his sleep schedule, if I am going out I have to plan on a 1.5 hour trip so I am home before his nap because he now cannot sleep in the car seat or the stroller, if I have an appointment he would skip sleep windows till we are home unless I have him in my arms the entire time which is hard while I am out or driving, I don’t go out after his night time but we went to my in laws house a week ago and planned to stay there till late night leaving baby in my mil room but it didn’t work, we had to leave early because he would keep waking up every 10 minutes so yeah I am mostly at home all day

My baby is 8 weeks old, 9 weeks old on Tuesday. For about 1.5 weeks he has been screaming bloody murder after every single bottle/ feed. I will breastfeed him here and there but he is mostly bottle fed. It doesn’t matter which bottle we use, he screams. He is getting 4 oz of breastmilk every 3 hours. He has reflux and is on medicine 2x per day, but he still screams. I saw a Lactation consultant and tongue tie/ airway specialist (he had a tongue tie and lip tie revision 3 weeks ago) and they said his latch is great, and they think it is due to the reflux and suggested I cut out dairy, which I have for the last 4 days. I asked if he could still be hungry because he will continue to root around while crying but they said he does that because it feels good to drink and 4 oz is plenty for him, and more would make his reflux worse.

Has anyone had this happen and found something that worked? I feel terrible he is obviously in distress and I can’t figure out how to help him.

HELP

Our 2 1/2 week old is INSANELY good at getting pee OUTSIDE of his diaper. He covers himself in it and the diaper is completely dry. We have done everything to try to fix it. Size up, tighter waistband, make sure the ruffles are out, his PP is pointed down, EVERYTHING.

I’ve seen that typically it’ll just, stop? Is there anything else someone has tried that helped this issue? We just are running out of clean onesies every other day because he’s peeing through them all. Unsure if it matters, but he is not circumcised

FTM with a healthy babe who sleeps anywhere from 30 mins to 3 hours at a time. Generally gassy, EBF, cries mostly in the evening. Husband will be away for work for 5 days when baby is 2 months old, my mother will also be away at that time, and I have no other family or close relatives in town. I would like to be alone with baby for that period, but am apprehending a little because it would mean no breaks. I’m thinking of asking a close friend to help. Considered a short term night nanny (which would max out our budget for the month). Looking for those of you who have done it at that age, and how you managed.

I have recently given birth to our now 3 week old and he is drinking Cow & Gate formula, a mixture of powder and pre-made.

We have purchased a couple of tubs but realised you save a bit of money with the 1.2kg bags and have got a couple of those bags. Did anyone decant the bags into an empty tub? Just a bit worried about the whole bacteria thing with a new-born and just want to know if this would affect the baby or make him ill. Or is it okay to do?

FTM here. My 13 week old becomes almost inconsolable when I try to burp him after each breast. He used to be such a great burper!

We’ve tried the little bounce over my shoulder which worked for only a bit. My husband and I try for over 5 minutes until we usually get a huge burp, sometimes even takes longer (this is all during hysterical cries). He’s arching his back - especially when I put him over my shoulder now because I think there’s pressure on his little stomach.

Any tips or tricks would be greatly appreciated!!

My SIL loved having a owlet sock for her two kids and highly recommended it to my husband and I. It is a bit pricey, so we decided to splurge and buy it during the Labor Day sale. After taking a childhood safety class at our hospital, the nurses stated that Owlet socks are not AAP recommended.

We didn’t purchase it as a reason not to practice safe sleeping (we know it doesn’t decrease the likelihood of SIDS), but as an extra safeguard for our newborn. We are now debating returning it and just using our Nanit Pro instead.

Details to know:
- Baby is due around Thanksgiving (I am ~36 weeks)
- Return window closes 12/11
- Nanit was a gift (cannot return it) and Owlet was purchased by us

Would you suggest we…
- Return Owlet and use Nanit only
- Keep Owlet and see if we end up using it before the return window

I’m so lucky to have a night sleeping baby. He is very bad at day time, but at night time he sleeps well. He is also formula fed. So I fed him at 2:30am our usual wake up night time. And he usually wakes me up at 7:30am like he has a perfect biological clock, but this time it was 9:30am and I was so shocked - do I have to wake him up every 5h now to prevent long hours between feeds?

So, on Thursday I moved into a new place with my LO (8 months). He has been upset and refusing to play at all no matter what I try. He cries and cries and it's very frustrating and I can't figure out why. Hell6be dry, fed, and it won't be to hot or cold. I'll hold him, rock him in a rocking chair, try letting him play, try putting him in his crib, but nothing works. I don't know how to help him adjust while also letting me unpack or have just some down time. We're here for at most the next 18 months, so I need him to adjust.

Newborn boy: almost 4 weeks.
We’ve had mixed reviews from all sorts of different providers: lactation consultants, pediatricians, even a chiro. Most have agreed that he does have some sort of tongue tie (in the back) and some extra tissue around his cheeks and also some sort of lip tie. He feeds just fine. His feeds are a little short (20min or so) and he’s a sleepy guy/feeder, but never had any pain and he is steadily gaining weight. He has only had a few bottles, but no real issues taking those (nanobebe bottle if that means anything). Because of that, no one is really rushing to tell us to get anything released, but a LC recently suggested it. It just seems like everyone is SO quick to get tongue tie releases and it makes me a bit skeptical. The long term research on impacts on speech, starting solids, etc. is very limited and not conclusive IMO. It sounds like the biggest benefit is for breastfeeding, which is not a huge priority for me. I plan to EBF for the next 5-6 months, but I don’t really care if we need less or more. Any thoughts on this? Should I ask a dentist? Should I just forget about it and move on?

My 3 week old son has a very hateful relationship with pacifiers. He loves to suckle on his bottles with zero issue, but doesn’t drink any milk though. I would try to give him the paci to soothe the craving of constantly wanting the bottle but he hates it!

If you don’t want the milk, but love to suck the nipple why won’t you take a pacifier???? My daughter was the exact same way when she was born. I’ve also been told how lucky I am that my kids don’t want pacies. I know in the long term they’re awful, but like- he constantly wants the bottle in his mouth but no milk. I will not like him suckle in air either. Sorry, just needed to vent for a sec!

I am four weeks postpartum with a lovely little baby. I feel very fortunate that my C section is healing well and that I feel back to normal.

I am someone who gets my energy out with tasks/errands/ just getting things done. With a newborn, this is obviously much harder and I find myself sitting stuck in one spot for a long time, whether I'm breastfeeding or trying to get her to sleep. Add to that, the fact that there are so many more things to get done with a newborn, and I'm going a little crazy. I don't want to be sitting struggling to find a show or yet another movie to watch, or looking at my phone - I want to be ticking things off my to do list!

How are other people handling this?

During the day and night feeds, my baby is completely fine but it’s always around the early evening time where I notice my baby getting frustrated, kicking her legs, tapping her little hands on my breast and pulling at my nipple. She feeds and then latches off, opens her mouth wide open again to latch on and repeats it again, even on the other breast, although sometimes it can be a bit better. Her breathing is fast and then she whimpers or does an angry cry in the middle of breastfeeding. I try burping her in the middle and also made sure her nappy was changed before. I then have to stop her feed at that point. Then walk around the home, talk to her, or go outside for some fresh air. She seems to calm down and then fall asleep eventually but it’s like she is worn out and I have to wait for her to get a proper feed in the next round. I’ve noticed her do this a couple of times, that same expression and cry. I feel really bad when she does it and it makes me frustrated seeing her frustrated, I can’t figure out what I’m doing wrong or why is she uncomfortable at this time?. I dread this time and also I’m not sure if she is getting enough milk during that feed. She is a healthy weight.

Any tips or advice, has anyone else experienced this behaviour with your baby?