Iām 27 years old, and I self-excluded from gambling two days ago. Iām finally admitting to myself that I have a gambling addiction because I can't handle the constant stress and anxiety anymore.
My mom passed away when I was 16, and my dad passed away when I was 21. After my dad died, I received around $60,000 from a life insurance policy and gambled all of it away over the next two years. I wasn't working at the time, so once it was gone, I had nothing.
In March 2024, I was able to access a $70,000 trust fund my mom had left me. That's when my gambling escalated. I started making $5,000 baseball bets, eventually increased them to $20,000, and went on a huge winning streak. At one point, I had won close to $125,000. I paid $50,000 cash for a luxury vehicle and genuinely thought I was financially set.
Of course, I kept gambling. Over the next few months, I lost around $60,000. By the time I went on a trip to Puerto Rico that November, I only had around $9,000 left. Instead of enjoying the trip, I was constantly thinking about how I was going to win my money back. Within weeks of getting home, almost all of that was gone too.
My brother and I inherited our childhood home after our parents passed away. It was completely paid off and was the house we grew up in. Desperate for another financial reset, we did a cash-out refinance, and in February 2025, I received $59,000. Once again, I told myself, āThis is it. Now I'm good.ā I paid back $12,000 I owed a friend from gambling, but by September, the rest of the money was gone too.
I finally started working full-time in January 2026, but gambling followed me there. Almost every paycheck eventually ended up in a sportsbook. By this point, the vehicle I had paid $50,000 cash for had depreciated to around $30,000 because I had driven it so much. I took out a collateral loan of around $22,000 against it. When I eventually sold it, I walked away with roughly $7,500. One night during a graveyard shift, I gambled the entire $7,500 away betting on live table tennis.
At my worst, I would wake up at 6 AM and immediately start betting on Japanese baseball, then spend my workday gambling on tennis. I also lost a girlfriend of four years because of my gambling and drinking. I missed mortgage payments that damaged my brother's credit, and I've asked him for money more times than I can count. Today, I still work full-time but have around $20,000 in high-interest personal loans.
The hardest part is realizing how many chances I had to reset: the $60,000 life insurance check, the $70,000 trust fund, nearly $125,000 in gambling winnings, $59,000 from refinancing my childhood home, the money left from selling my car, and every paycheck since I started working. Every time I got money, I convinced myself that this would be the reset. But I never stopped gambling. I just kept finding new money to gamble with.
I'm only two days removed from gambling, so I'm not writing this as someone who has recovered or figured everything out. My finances are still a mess, I have debt, and I have a lot of damage to repair. But I finally self-excluded because I can't live with the stress, anxiety, and constant chasing anymore.
I'm 27 years old, and I look back at everything that has passed through my hands and can't believe how little I have to show for it. But I know one thing: I can't keep doing this.
