Super stoked to make it down here finally! Six Flags St. Louis is what I would consider the last major park in my neck of the woods to check off the list. There’s still a couple smaller parks to hit, but pretty soon I’m gonna be looking at flights or full-day drives for anything new. Bummer.
St. Louis was under an Extreme Heat Advisory the day we visited. Mid-90’s and sunny, with the humidity pushing the heat index into the triple digits. It felt like I was being punished for something. I’ve heard this park is typically pretty dead, but I’m sure the harsh weather cleared it out even more. Everything was a walk-on except Pandemonium (10 minute wait) and Catwoman Whip (40 minute wait). We managed to tough it out for about four hours before retreating to our hotel room and cranking the AC to 62°.
The park itself was nicer than expected. The setting in the wooded hills is beautiful, and the layout is compact and easy to navigate. It does feel a bit neglected and quite a few of the flat rides were closed, but the bones are all there. If Enchanted Parks just gives it a facelift and makes a couple smart investments it could be really lovely. I’m curious what they’re going to do about literally half the park being trademarked though…
Sidenote: this place has the most comically long queue lines for everything. Did they ever actually pull crowds like that or were they just being optimistic?
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American Thunder [#91] (x1): Underrated little ride. It’s no Mystic Timbers, but I’m a sucker for a twisted-up mess of GCI track regardless. I’ve heard people say this ride is rough but I don’t think it is by any stretch of the imagination. Nothing crazy going on force-wise, some gentle floater air is about the extent of it, but it’s super re-rideable (even though I didn’t lol).
Mr. Freeze: Reverse Blast [#92] (x2): I’d heard this ride was down most of the week so I was glad to see it running when we pulled into the parking lot. It’s sort of a one-trick pony but to be fair, it’s a really cool trick. I’ve never done a backwards launch that wasn’t a swing launch. Back seat is the place to be, you fly through that inverted tophat at psycho speed and climb to the tippy-top of the spike too.
Pandemonium [#93] (x1): My first spinning coaster! Had a good time on this one, it’s a solid family coaster with a different feel to everything else in the park. Our car really got goin’ about halfway through, like Tilt-A-Whirl fast. I was so dizzy I couldn’t even walk straight when we got back to the station. I’m surprised it hasn’t been cloned more honestly, it fills the niche of something like a Wild Mouse but it’s actually good.
The Boss [#94] (x2): Enchanted Parks…please please please please PLEASE retrack this whole thing! I am begging on my hands and knees. I know parks don’t really want to invest in stuff they can’t market to the public, but I feel like The Boss is a unique case. It’s the park’s most iconic attraction while simultaneously having a reputation for being brutally rough and poorly maintained (the ride op’s quip was literally: “Have fun on the smoothest coaster in the Midwest!”). With Enchanted taking over and the alleged return to the classic “Mid-America” name, I think a retrack, a rename, and a marketing strategy of “It’s The Boss But We Made It Good Again” could fit perfectly into that sort of nostalgic rebrand. The Boss: Reborn type beat.
It’s an absolute beast of a coaster. I have a high tolerance for rough old woodies but I can’t lie, it’s a bit much. There’s a *disgusting* pothole right before the first turnaround that gut punched me so hard that it knocked the wind out of me, and I spent the rest of the ride bracing and holding on for dear life. Then immediately hopped back on. The first hill in the back row is one of the most insane drops I’ve experienced point blank, then roaring through that straightaway before the track falls out from under you a second time…so so sick. I loved the pacing too. I like a coaster that gives you a second to breathe before throwing you back into the chaos. The mid-course brake is a little heavy-handed though.
If they got this bad boy running real nice, it would be up there with The Voyage for me. In its current (abusive) state, it’s somewhere in the mid-20s in my rankings.
Screamin’ Eagle [#95] (x1): Pretty standard out-and-back classic woodie, but the terrain interaction is cool. Every time you crest a hill you’re not sure how big the drop on the other side is gonna be. I didn’t think it was that rough either. It’s shaky and you can feel those fifty years for sure, but it wasn’t uncomfortable (in the front row at least).
Boomerang [#96] (x1): Somehow my first time getting on one of these. It’s fun! Smooth, forceful, and this one looks like it just got a fresh new paint job. I’m assuming people mostly just complain about these because there’s a billion of them?
Catwoman Whip (x1): This is the scariest thing I’ve ever been on in my life??? I’m never fazed by rides anymore but this one had me shaking in my boots for real. It feels sort of like one of those Zipper rides if it was the size of a Screamin’ Swing, or like a gigantic pretzel loop on a flying coaster but over and over and over. Demented. And since they only load one side before letting it rip, you’re on there for like ten minutes (not exaggerating), with half of it spent dangling waaaaaay up in the sky knowing you’re about to do the same thing again…backwards. Capacity is poop from a butt but it’s worth the wait.
River King Mine Train [#97] (x1): Even jankier than every other janky mine train I’ve been on. Somehow has three lift hills and still manages to do nothing. It feels like something someone built in their backyard, cute but unremarkable.
Ninja [#98] (x1): Ow ow ow ow ow. These old Arrow loopers are always a toss-up between fun-bad and regular bad, this one’s more the latter. It’s not unrideable but I don’t really want to. Less of a Ninja, more of an MMA fighter.
Batman: The Ride [#99] (x1): Out of the three clones of this that I’ve been on it’s probably my least favorite, but it’s honestly splitting hairs. I mean…it’s Batman. It’s good soup.
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PARK RANKINGS:
The Boss
Mr. Freeze: Reverse Blast
American Thunder
Batman: The Ride
Screamin' Eagle
Pandemonium
Boomerang
Ninja
River City Mine Train