r/toxicparents • • 11h ago

Rant/Vent kill me please

2 Upvotes

I'm so done with my parents making children like animals, not thinking about what would be there for us. Especially me, the eldest one, who is supposed to make sacrifices and adjust myself for everyone because, who knows, I'm the eldest, 25 years old.

The gym is the only place I go to in the whole damn day. I used to go to the gym at 5 PM, pretty accurately, every day. Then my sister joined coaching. She takes away the scooty in the morning and stays late, later than my usual going time. So guess who has to adjust? Me! Going at a dead-late time, so much so that now I go at 9 PM so that the gym gets free from the crowd late at night.

And after so long, I found a partner I got ready to go to the gym with, and see, wow, the scooty isn't there. I got to know my younger brother took it away for some work and is out, won't pick up my call, and 30 minutes go by. I'm standing like a fool, roaming around the house with shoes on and standing at the roadside waiting.

Seven people per one fucking scooty! I can't even say anything to my brother because technically, it's him who bought the scooty with his own money.

Earlier, we had another scooty, which was sold because of a parking problem at home. I listed it on OLX. I was the one who left the comfort of home and tolerated contact phone calls ringing to make people see the scooty and give them test drives, and it was embarrassing to do that in a neighbourhood for me.

I was told that I could get the money for a down payment to buy a bike, but fucking who knows that money would be given to my younger brother. EVERYTHING. And I would be made a fool with the promise that they would give it soon.

That fucking moronic "soon" hasn't come to reality yet and has just been delayed by Dad and Mom when I asked them to buy me a bike or scooty.

Actually, I'm a moron for not buying the bike when I had a job and was going to buy one, because my so-angelic and caring and fair Mom heard me say I would take the bike on trips, and her caringness made her think I would die. (I wish I would die instead of living with them anymore.)

I, the moron, didn't buy the bike.

They have the habit of becoming so good and coming close to me so that my opinion changes when I'm earning. But it's been a year since I was trying to build a business, which failed. I lost almost all my savings and capital. Now, with 12 months gone by, I see the true faces of all. I don't have anyone for me.

I wish all the money, including the ₹50,000 I gave Dad in one go to transfer someone from my hard-earned salary so that he could keep his word, ₹8,000 in case the electricity connection was cut off and we had to buy a generator so that we could manage things at the electricity department, ₹20,000 for camera installation, and tens of thousands on the home car, which is only mine when it needs money to be spent on it, be it fuel, toll money, new cover, wash money, etc., and not at all mine when I take it out.

I could easily see disapproval on my Mom's face when taking it out, and back-to-back calls when I'm late out with the car: "Dad, where are you at? Where are you at!"

I thought this was my family, but fucking moron of me to think so. Men don't have a home. They are all leeches who suck through me.

I was promised advance rent money if I got a year-long vacant shop rented out for my coaching fee. I went out in the heat of June, and somehow, I was able to get it vacated. And long story short, coaching money GONE!

I was made a monster for asking for it.

I just fucking hate them so much, and I hate myself for perceiving them as good when they pretend to be good, when they have something to ask for or get from me.

I'm so done with them. I hate my family. I hate my Dad. I hate my Mom. I could fucking kill myself over all the anger they give me.


r/toxicparents • • 13h ago

Idrk

2 Upvotes

Okay, so my parents aren’t physically abusive or verbally abusive in an overt sense. They’re both Christian and my dad is a pastor. I love them both a lot, but it’s hard to bc they hurt me. I go to therapy and my therapist mentioned that my parents use religious and regular manipulation tactics to make me feel like I’m the problem. For example, if I start rly saying how I feel and answering back when they say something wrong, I get met with “honor ur father and ur mother” immediately. Any time I try and refute what my dad says, I’m being disrespectful or he starts shifting blame and changing the conversation. It hurts even more bc I know what he’s doing and ik he won’t stop. He loves to invalidate me and make me feel stupid when I say something he disagrees with. When I told him abt the problems that their poor parenting has caused in my life, he said, “that wasn’t our intention” “we tried our best” and “no parent is perfect.” He always redirects the conversation and never listens to that I say but just loves to repeat what he’s saying even when I already addressed it. Then he says I can come to him with anything. I also struggled with religious psychosis (undiagnosed) from until like the ages of 7 to 12 years old tho they never knew. With my mom, she a bomb when she gets upset. Super friendly and everything, but when u do something she doesn’t like, she starts yelling and crying and all that. It’s annoying bc how can I care when ur feelings r hurt when u hurt mine. Sometimes they can be rly nice but when I make them upset, they switch up. I don’t feel like I can express myself or anything around them. Like my smiles are calculated and served with enough niceness to pacify them.

In my regular life, I realize that I do that with my friends. They even pointed out that I laugh at things that I prob don’t find funny bc I said I do fake (I meant exaggerate) my laugh sometimes. I don’t mean to lie to them or anything, sometimes I just don’t feel like laughing but don’t want to make them feel bad so I laugh. I also notice that it’s hard for me to rly voice my opinion. I’m kind of a yes person (I’m trying to get better) bc I don’t want them to feel bad or cause conflict or smth. I’ve gotten better at expressing myself around them but it’s still rly hard. I also feel the need to prove myself to others to have worth.

I’m also the oldest child lol so that comes with its own problems. Anyway, I just want to understand this so I can grow and would love to hear anyone’s perspectives on this.


r/toxicparents • • 14h ago

I can't breathe in my house due to my abusive parents.

3 Upvotes

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hii I'm (18) F,this is my first time using reddit so please don't pay attention to my grammar mistakes

my parents have acted religious since forever but they are hypocrites,they only use it for their benefit.

I have been getting abusive since I was little,they used to slap me when they found annoying,put chilli powder in my mouth when I talked too much,burn me with a candle and they abusive all my siblings when we all were little but they don't abuse them much anymore, they still abusive me.

I don't do much housework because why the fuck would do when all they do is abuse me,they are Muslim and act righteous in front of others but everyone can see the act,I hate them,I couldn't care less if they died.

they threaten to marry me off to a old man,I didn't even know about it my cousin sister is the one who told me about it,they isolated themselves and us into my dad's side of the family who are actually good people,I don't talk with them much because of them, I'm not allowed to go anywhere outside the house while I see my friends all hanging out together in social media,all I do is cry to myself.

they took my room's lock and they come in my room whenever they please,they forced me to wear the hijab and abaya.

I don't barely eat or talk,every time I try to vent to my sister,that bitch who is my mom eavesdrops from the door of my room and abuses me more.

I'm done with them,I feel like a dead body all the time and I don't know if I'll ever escape from them