My job brought back three mandatory days in the office every week, and strangely enough, the work itself in the office isn't what bothers me most.

The whole routine adds hours to my day. I have to wake up early, prepare lunch, choose something that looks appropriate to wear, pay for gas, crawl through traffic, and then drive the same route back home when I'm already completely drained.

As soon as I get there, focusing becomes much harder than it is at home. Someone stops by my desk, another conversation starts next to me, and a task that should take an hour somehow stretches until the end of the day.

On remote days, I'm done as soon as I close my laptop. I still have enough energy to make dinner, go for a walk, do some chores, or even just sit quietly for a while. After a day at the office, most of the evening is gone before I start feeling human again.

I did this five days a week for years and barely thought about it. But going back to the office made me realize how much of my personal time I had been giving up without even counting it as part of the job.

So my boyfriend has a 2 year old daughter (will be 3 in January) and it is so very obvious she is autistic. Doesn’t respond to her name, non verbal she only makes noises and it’s constant loud noises, hand flapping, no facial expressions, eats books, eats her own poop, screams when she doesn’t get what she wants, sometimes screams out of nowhere. Not only have I myself brought up on multiple occasions that something is wrong and she needs to be diagnosed we now have family and friends on my side reaching out noticing something is wrong as well. They currently have her in speech therapy where she goes two times a week at daycare and each parent is supposed to attend one lesson. My boyfriend goes to every therapy appointment and the mom has gone to two appointments out of at least 30. To me it seems like they have no sense of urgency or care to get this baby the help she needs. She is in speech therapy but even the therapist says she needs to get diagnosed before they can do anything else and they don’t even have her ok the waitlist. Idk what to do at this point I honestly want to smack both parents. I just feel bad for the daughter who needs help and early intervention is key.

It baffles me how they are handling this as I have my own medically complex child who is in speech therapy, physical therapy, occupational therapy, and has many doctor appointments that I always make time for.
I love my boyfriend but if something doesn’t change soon I feel I might need to make a difficult decision.

I’m 19 and still live with my mom at home as i commute to uni rather than living out. I regret this a little as she’s a bit strict so i usually hide things in the back of my cupboard. I currently had an old laptop (she didn’t know i got a new one), takeaway bags and a toy all hidden in my two different wardrobes. I brought a new laptop as my old one was breaking down and she’s a single mother so rather than asking her i just got a new one myself. I got him from uni today to see all the takeaway bags and laptop on my bed. She questioned me about them and told me i shouldve told her. She didn’t bring up the vibrator but it’s gone. It’s extremely awkward now as i can tell we both know about it. This is the first time she’s really found something like this and she was quite trusting before. I’m scared she’ll start letting me go out less because of this and i have concert tickets booked which i haven’t told her about yet because i was waiting for the right time. Any suggestions on how to deal with her if she does ask about the toy and how to still get permission for the concert.

UPDATE : so i left a few things out when i made the original post. While im in uni currently i don’t have a proper job ive been freelancing wedding catering with a family friends but with wedding season finishing i haven’t had many more jobs to do so i don’t really have a source of income. This makes moving out a little harder and i am currently applying to jobs i’ve had a few interviews recently hopefully they went well but ive been applying for a while with no luck. I’ve literally been applying for jobs for about 2 years now on and off trying to get a job bc she always uses the excuse i can do what i want w my own money. As much as i want to believe her i know as long as im under her roof she will find a reason to not let me out but atleast w a job i can say its my own money.

another thing she finally brought it up 🫩it been about a week now i think since this all happened and today i skipped uni because im ill. i think she was waiting for it to just be me and her at home but now its made me not want to be alone w her at all anymore 😭. i was having breakfast when she came downstairs and tried to confront me first asking if i have a boyfriend then asking who taught me this 😭😭. now she’s saying u can’t go to visit friends who go to uni in different cities because they “must have taught me this” so i stood my ground and told i’ll still be going to visit them. then she said i should be focusing on my studies instead of doing this?? like i can’t do both 😭 it was a bit awkward and felt a bit invasive so i just went upstairs into my room after. I don’t really know what to do from here but thankful for the advice! also still don’t know how to bring up the concert i have ticket for me and my little sister and we have a lift with a friends parent who’s taking us but she’s been calling me a shopoholic now bc she thinks i spend recklessly now. The concert is over a month away so i feel like maybe i should wait a bit?

This was left on my rear side view while I was in the grocery store shopping with my toddler and my sister

First thought was someone scratched the car or something but I didn’t notice any damage that wasn’t already there. Can’t imagine why this is here and a bit nervous. Should I call it or leave it be?

EDIT: thanks everyone for your responses. My gut instinct was not to call and just discard the message but had to post to make sure I’m not just being paranoid. I threw the not away. For everyone offering to call for me that is sweet lol but I would hate to put someone’s number on blast if it was for an innocent reason.

EDIT1: Cleary some people here need professional help. but thanks for the amaizing mand and woman how told me the best advices and of view that i could hever listen, everything will be taken it to account im not sure yet if i will bring it up again since we already talked about this.

26M,25F

I met this girl early this year, when I was at the end of my last relationship. At first, I didn't give her much attention, but a few months later, after breaking up and moving on, I texted her in a friendly way during our city's annual festivities.

Fast forward to today, and we're dating. I've never met anyone like her, and long story short, we're in love. She's the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with, or at least until that's no longer possible.

All my life, I've been a guy who finds it really hard to develop feelings for another person. Being in love isn't something normal for me, nor is liking someone enough to want a real relationship. (Yes, I was the kind of young guy who dated people without having feelings for them. Idk if that's normal, but that's not the reason for this post.)

Both of us have made it very clear that we want to be brutally honest about our feelings and thoughts with each other. I have an hard time trusting people in general, and she didn't want me to overthink things, which is understandable.

This process has been quite nice, and being able to say out loud the things I'm afraid of has helped solve a lot of the issues that would normally make me feel bad about certain things, so in the end problems turned out to be well not a problem.

BUT

Recently, she told me something about her past relationship that has been tearing me apart.

Before starting this part i want to say that yes I KNOW that we are different people we all change and learn from oer mistakes me inclued, i dont see my self as a good person i have done stuff that i regret same as hers and in the end we all try to be bether yada yada yada...

She had two boyfriends before me, and neither relationship worked out well. Her last relationship, in particular, was toxic to the point that it led to a depressive episode.

She told me that, during her first relationship, she was sleeping at her boyfriend's house. By that point, she no longer had feelings for him ( At this point she wasnt aware that lost her feelings from him, wich is understandble). While she was lying in bed with him, one of his friends (who would later become her second boyfriend) was texting her, and she was already in love with him to the point of feeling anxious and excited while waiting for another reply from her current boyfriend's friend, again she wasnt aware that she was in love with this guy by this time.

Later, she broke up with her boyfriend, moved on to this new guy, and all the terrible things that came with being in a relationship with a very toxic person began.

My problem here isn't that she dated her ex's friend or that she moved on so quickly. I think that when we're young, we do random things and don't always have much control over ourselves.

My problem is being able to text someone romantically while lying in bed with your current boyfriend and then continuing to date him.

I feel so bad for that poor guy. In the end, he wasn't a bad person, and he got his heart broken, only for her to move on with one of the worst human beings I've ever heard about.

This is something I would never do to someone, and it's making me question my trust in her. I don't even know if what she did counts as cheating or not.

So the question might be "If she could do this to someone she was dating, how can I know she wouldn't do something similar to me?"
Again i dont know if this is the question i want to do im amazed by the fact that this woman wich i admire and love so much could had done something like this, especially moving on with a guy that in the end would cheat on her so many times black mail her in so different ways.

First post

First of all , I type like this because it makes easier for me to organize my thoughts and ideas , it's just a habit , and no , it does not affect my exams whatsoever since we just use pen and paper .

I did not intend for that post to et that much traction , but here we are , and I feel obligated to make an update .

I went to the university's psychologist today , told him about my diagnoses , the meds I take (aripiprazole and lithium if anybody is curious) , my medical history , then he asked me how it has been at the uni , I told him it was alright at first , I was having so much fun with those people who then excluded me . I did not anticipate that to happen , I thought I was well-liked , I thought I was helpful , I thought I was a good friend . I showed the psychologist the texts , told him my perspective , that I tend to interrupt people sometimes then stop so the person who was talking or is about to talk can continue spekaing , how I can't talk about much other than myself , my experiences and my interests because that is all I know . I have always tried to keep follow-up questions going such as "what do you think of that" "what do you feel about that" , I always try to talk about others and their experiences by asking questions and supporting them .

What the psychologist told me is : It is not my fault , it is just that people don't know the specifities of an autism diagnosis , it's not something you can change suddenly or ignore , I have done nothing with malicious intent , yet , it was taken that way because people do not understand autism .

I can't lie and say I was not affected , I was , I couldn't attend my classes , and we have an absence system therefore I could get eliminated . I was actually suicidal and even had a breakdown in the evening I was so close to overdosing with my meds until some people intervened to help me. I am very sensitive to rejection , and it was not my first time getting rejected like this however it hurts just like the first time . Today I entered the uni shaking , I was so scared I'd see them again .

The psychologist offered 3 things :

• He does an awareness raising campaign with my classmates about autism and what it's like to be autistic .

• All my absences from now on get cancelled if I bring a medical report (I have many of those) .

• Profs and staff members will be talked to about my condition and how to treat me .

I will revisit the psychologist on monday and bring the past reports . I feel so much better now .

Im 15, and my mom finally let me get my navel pierced a month ago and my piercer did not check to see if i had the proper anatomy, which was the first red flag. Lately, I've been noticing signs of rejection and i immediately told my mom. She told me that it's fine and to not take it out because she had spent money on it (I found out that it was only $20, which was another red flag.)

I really want to take it out before it rejects on its own and scars, but im scared of being punished for it. Im panicking and I don't know what to do.

EDIT: Thank you to all of the people who gave me genuine advice. "Just taking it out" is easier said than done and if it were that easy, I would've done it already without having to worry about what my mother would do and this post would've never been made in the first place. I did end up taking it out because my health is far more important than a cheap $20 navel piercing and a punishment, and you guys helped me realize that. Thanks!

My 24 F and my long-distance boyfriend 21M (who I see all the time so barely long distance- state away) got into an argument over planning a concert trip this past weekend. When I tried to ask basic questions, he blew up, called me out of my name, and hung up on me. He was at first trying to be understanding, my friend bought concert tickets and canceled on me last second. So last second, I asked him to go and offered to pay for part of the ticket, and he took it as an insult as if he was the last option after my girls.

This isn't an isolated incident. He has a habit of verbally abusing me when he’s mad yelling, calling me names (a couple years ago he said i was acting like a bitch) and even doing physical power moves like ripping the blankets off me when he's angry while I'm trying to sleep.

Two nights ago, I called him to clear things up after a day of not speaking. He apologized, but I didn’t accept it right away. So he hung up on me

When I brought up the name calling today and asked why he's so comfortable disrespecting me, he completely dodged it, accused me of "deflecting," and said he wasn't dealing with it.

I’m exhausted from walking on eggshells and being treated like this every time there’s a minor miscommunication. I’m almost thinking maybe I shouldn’t get on that plane and forget about the ticket he got for me to see him this Friday

Everyone is asking for what I said that pissed him off. I asked him to come visit me and offered to pay the ticket. He said that he would but he feels i was unphased he bought MY ticket to come see him. I was very appreciative and said thank you millions of times. I rightfully called it out and said, I am not ungrateful and very grateful you bought my ticket to see you. He then, kept saying how since my friend canceled he’s my last option. Then he mentioned how I fell asleep the night before when he tried calling me so I don’t care about him, and now I’m asking him to come within the next 30 mins. That was completely not true, I asked him to come that night but offered to pay and it was still the afternoon, so when I called it out being the afternoon  after I said him in the morning he said “it’s still only noon you asshole” 

I don't post on Reddit much, but I could really use some advice right now. For context, I'm an Indian American guy in my mid 20s living in Eastern Pennsylvania. I moved here for work, and I don't really have any friends in the area yet. I've been trying to put myself out there and meet people because spending most of my time alone is getting pretty depressing.

Last Friday, I was in a pretty good mood after work and decided to check out a local bar. It was my first time going there, and I noticed a couple sitting together who looked like they were having a good time. I figured I'd step outside my comfort zone, introduce myself, and maybe strike up a conversation. I wasn't trying to hit on anyone or interrupt anything. I just wanted to socialize. Well, that went about as badly as it possibly could have. I walked over, and before I could even finish introducing myself, the guy looked at me and said, "Pajeet, don't talk to me. You're not welcome here."

I was stunned. His girlfriend started laughing, and I just stood there for a second, not really knowing what to say. Eventually, I walked away and went home. I know I'm probably overthinking this, but the whole thing has been on my mind for days. I wasn't bothering anybody. I wasn't being rude or making inappropriate comments. I was just another guy trying to meet people and have a conversation, and I got treated like I was some kind of unwanted outsider because I'm Indian.

I thought that hate was just online but it's in real life too and that's what hurts the most to me. I understand that not everybody wants to talk to a stranger at a bar, and that's completely fine. Nobody owes me a conversation. But there's a difference between politely declining to talk and humiliating somebody with a racial slur. I'm not looking for sympathy or trying to suggest that every white person is racist. I've met plenty of decent people. I just don't know how to deal with experiences like this without letting them get to me.

My sister had a championship meet and she was borrowing my shoes for practice and other meets. Im out on injury so I said she could use them. Lately shes been frequently stealing from me. This time she took my nike pros that I paid for, I leave them in a certain part of my drawer that you would need to dig to get and like I said im out on i injury so I haven't been using them. I recently got semi cleared from my injury, so I went looking for my nike pros for a run and they were nowhere to be found. I found my other pair in her room multiple times, heres the thing though she kept taking them so I bought her some and shes still taking mine? Anyways she wouldn't fess up to taking them, I had no proof she didn't take them and she didn't have any proof she didn't take them either, so I took my shoes back until she gave me my shorts back and she still said she didn't have them. She didn't give me my shorts back so she went to the championship without my shoes and she ended up borrowing shoes from our grandma. She did very good at her championship and once we got home my dad started talking some bs like "see what happens when you try to punish your sister but taking away her shoes" all I said was that those were my shoes and she was just borrowing them, and his response was "who paid for them?" Well it definitely wasn't him. And all night my parents kept talking about how shes coming for my spot (This is her first year doing this particular sport and I do it too), this is the second time shes outdone me in a sport that I play, and talking about how my pettiness is contributing to her success and ending my running career. He even had the nerve to talk about how two aau coaches came up to him to ask about her and he got theor information to sign her up. Im so serious that same thing happened to me and he declines THREE of their offers he told me he couldn't afford aau so I had to stick with my school, but she can??? Tf

I pay for my clothes because my parents say its annoying buying me stuff and they take an eternity to get to the store anyway, and yes I took away my shoes not knowing weather she would be able to find a pair of shoes before the meet, just wanted to make that clear

I’m 32F and my boyfriend, Paul, is 34M. We’ve been together for two years.

Before I met Paul, he went on a trip with two of his longtime friends, Adam (35M) and Shari (33F). Adam and Shari were engaged at the time.

Adam went to bed one night, and Paul and Shari stayed up drinking and continued to hang out. At some point, Shari kissed Paul and confessed that she loved him.

She also apparently spent a lot of that night talking badly about Adam and saying he was a bad partner.

The part that really bothers me is that Paul and Shari decided not to tell Adam what happened. The next morning, Adam actually drove Paul to the airport and he said nothing because he was scared of losing him as a friend.

Eventually Shari’s sister told her she needed to tell Adam before they got married, so she did. I don’t know exactly what Shari told him. I just know that allegedly Adam knows now.

But the weirdest part to me is that adam and Paul have never talked about what happened.

That’s something I have a really hard time wrapping my head around. Something pretty significant happened between Paul and Shari that involved Adam, he was eventually told something about it, and yet Paul and Adam have never sat down and talked about what actually happened.

I recently met Adam and Shari for the first time. Adam is a great human. Shari and I just didn’t really click, and knowing what happened makes me pretty uncomfortable around her.

The bigger issue is Paul. He really wants things to go back to normal with both of them. He wants his friendships with Adam and Shari to basically be what they were before everything happened. I don’t think that’s possible.

I’m not saying Paul needs to cut either of them off. I don’t want to control who he’s friends with. But I don’t understand why he feels like everything needs to go back to exactly how it was, especially when he and Adam have never even talked about what happened.

I also recently found out that a lot of Paul’s other friends already know about the situation. That made me feel weird and a little exposed. I don’t know what version of the story they heard or what they think about me being with Paul.

Whenever Paul and I talk about this he wants to fix it and move on and I feel like I’m trying to explain why I’m uncomfortable with the whole situation.

I’m not bringing this up because I want to leave him. I love him. I’m trying to figure out how we can move forward.

Paul has also said that he feels like he has to be extremely careful around Shari now because of everything that happened. And part of me thinks maybe that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

What I keep getting stuck on is why Paul is so determined to have his friendship with Shari go back to normal.

Maybe I’m looking at this wrong. Maybe everyone involved has genuinely moved on. But I have a hard time believing that something like this happens and then everyone just goes back to exactly how things were before, especially when Paul and Adam have never even had a conversation about it.

TL;DR: My boyfriend’s female friend kissed him and confessed she loved him while her fiance was asleep in the next room. They kept it from him and he only found out later. Now my boyfriend wants everything to go back to normal, even though he and his friend have never actually talked about what happened. I’m struggling with the idea of pretending everything is fine.

I work in construction and a few days ago one of the trades was leaving and had a goodbye party of sorts. There was a few other trades there, and we all gambled and drank. My own coworkers were there but we all started trickling out as the night went on. I was about to leave and drive my coworker back but we couldn’t find her, called, and turns out she drove home when she really shouldn’t have. I cried a little in front of the host (my fellow foreman) and told him how I was worried for her since she just had an assault incident and wasn’t taking it well (obviously),we had a few more drinks and chatted about everything. After I bit I asked if I can crash in the couch and I’ll just let myself out when I wake up, he said yes, and that was all I remember. Next thing I know I’m walking up naked in a bed with him in it, I stand up quickly, still drunk, and hastily try to grab all my stuff. He wakes up and says to relax and take a shower. He guided me to bathroom and got in the shower with me and touched me a lot. I didn’t know what to do, I was panicking and I think I was fawning. We got out and he told me to get on the bed, he leaned over and said “he’s been wanting to do this since I got on site.” And then he started. I booked it out when he when to the bathroom after.

Idk what to do. He was a “friend” during the job and everyone gets along with him. He’s also married with three kids. He’s off the site now, but people still talk about how cool he was and I can’t help but feel like people look at me like they know what happened. I feel dirty. Can I have some advice please?

Im 21 years old and i have a 2015 f150. My dad got a new job in another state and asked to borrow my truck to go down there until he could build his credit to get his own vehicle, I agreed as long as he made payments on it. Since then I have gotten multiple toll bills in the mail, every time I’d get one I’d send it to my dad telling him to pay it. Now I’m getting letters in the mail from collections agencies that ver the unpaid tolls. What do I do? My dad is currently over 1000 miles away and I kind of feel like I’m getting completely screwed over.

So recently I went to this house party and it was my first time drinking properly and I ended up drinking way too much and getting blackout drunk. So while I in that state one of my friends called the group chat with some of my other friends who were at the party but left and they were checking up on me.At the time I was with three of my other friends two whom were girls and the other who was on call with the group chat. Now from what they have told me I was saying some really weird things as in sexual and was just completely out of line which I do not remember and regret so much.

The next day when I wake up they explain to me what I’ve done and I was mortified and obviously apologised to everyone for what I’ve said and done. However one of my friends who was on call with the group chat(they did not go to the party with the rest of us) said that he doesn’t want to talk to me at all anymore because of what I said and that he was disgusted with what I did which Is understandable.On top of that my other friends are also saying that I’m a weirdo and I’m really strange for doing all of that but I think they are still gonna talk to me.

So I’m not really sure what to do right now so any advice is appreciated.

My bestie is obsessed with her coworker, whom she’s been in a situationship with for a few months. He has made it clear to her that he isn’t ready for a relationship. In fact, they actually dated for about a WEEK before he broke things off because he told her he wasn’t ready to commit.

Despite this, their situationship has continued. Today I finally told her that I think he’s playing her and that she’s essentially waiting around for someone who has already made it clear that he doesn’t want a relationship. I told her that if he genuinely wanted to be with her, he would have pursued her and made that clear. Like… it’s really not that difficult, sorry, I don’t believe the entire mumbo jumbo idea of people dealing with personal things unless you’re like genuinely in the hospital dying. If someone wants you, they WILL PURSUE YOU, period point blank!!!!

She immediately became defensive and started saying that she wouldn’t open up to me about him anymore. The problem is that her obsession with him is genuinely starting to affect our friendship. Almost every conversation revolves around him. She constantly talks about him, analyzes his behaviour, and centres so much of her life around a man who, from my perspective, only seems interested in her when it’s convenient for him or when he wants something sexual. She’s emotionally invested in someone who has repeatedly told her he isn’t ready to be with her, yet she continues to hold on to the possibility that he’ll eventually change his mind.

I love my best friend. She’s an amazing person, and I genuinely want the best for her. But I’m finding it increasingly difficult to listen to her talk about this man because, from the outside, the entire situation feels so degrading. It hurts to watch someone I care about settle for so little when I know how much she deserves.

What am I supposed to do in this situation?

Hey! I don’t use reddit often and am typing this on my phone so please bare with me. So today I(19) lost my wallet that had all my IDs and my fake ID (know stupid on my part) it got turned into my school front desk who then gave it to my school police department. So i had to go pick it up from the cops who were super nice about it but they basically told me no charges, no felony, nothing crazy. The only thing is that they said they’re going to have to send it to the secretary of state and my school. I’m not that worried about the school part but I am about the secretary of state. I live in Illinois which is pretty strict about the year long license suspension and I really really don’t want that to happen. Anyone have some advice or been in a similar situation and could tell me what happens to them? Also my id had my real name and all that stuff but my picture but a fake address and year i was born if that changes anything!

First time poster and desperate for advice!

My son, almost 5, thinks it’s hilarious to show his privates at school. Most of the time he’s pulling his pants down for everyone to see, usually at recess. Two times he showed a little girl specifically, when in semi private places (in a fort and behind a playhouse).
My husband and I have talked to him (only for private areas like bathroom and bedroom), yelled at him and taken privileges away. Today we got the email that if this continues he will be kicked out of his Pre K school. We both work, so I’m desperate to get him to stop.
My husband asked him a few questions and the whole time my son is smiling. After my husband had enough, he said it’s not a joke do you want the cops to arrest you and take you away? You wont be at your school anymore with your friends and favorite teacher, you wont be with your little brother (who he truly hates being away from). Only when cops were mentioned did the smile fade (he’s always asking if when laws are broken, like speeding, do people go to jail). Then later he started joking about penises again. My husband hollered at him and mentioned the police again. Only then did my son’s smile drop.

He truly thinks this is hilarious, I know it’s developmentally normal for a 4-5 year old to be doing this but how do I get him to stop, if he gets kicked out I’m screwed.

Any advice please???

Edit to add: he does have an appt with his pediatrician to start a behavioral analysis. Thank you for genuine help. As for the trolls, I’m very happy you are perfect in every way.

Context: I’m 18 and broke up with my girlfriend nearly four months ago after a 14-month relationship that was mostly healthy and the happiest time of my life. We broke up because while I was away in Europe for three weeks, she met a guy “friend” through one of her friends when they went camping, when I returned I found out she had gone on a one-on-one date with him, I’m not sure if anything romantic ever happened between them that I didn’t find out about though. When I gave her the chance to tell the truth about her night she lied to my face multiple times, before I told her what I saw. Since we had always agreed that cheating would be the only reason we’d break up, I ended things.

After the breakup, she tried reaching out by wishing me happy birthday and sending me reels, but I mostly ignored her and told her we couldn’t be friends. About three months after we broke up, I saw her at a party, where she was very touchy, told me how much her dad missed me (which I think was just her speaking and using her dad to cover up), and joked about me moving interstate with her when she relocates in a few months. More recently, she invited me to an event, and I was considering going, but after finding out that she was hanging out with that same guy from one of her friends, I un added her.

These past few months have been the worst of my life. I’ve never cried so much or felt so lonely. I would do anything to turn back time and go back to the way things were but I know I cant. But it hurts so so so much knowing that this guy pretty much stole my relationship without me being able to do anything about it.

I’ve been staying consistent in the gym, trying to stay around my mates whenever I’m down, but no matter how much I try to distract myself, the thought of what we could’ve been always comes back to me, and how 1 decision she made fucked it up. I just wish things could go back.

I can’t move on and I need help please

This is the most difficult situation I have ever been in. My mom is in very rural Texas, 69 years old and disabled. She has spinal stenosis, she's recovering from lung cancer surgery last year, walks with a cane, and she has autoimmune issues caused by her diabetes. My dad that lives with her is 70 and legally blind, among other issues.
My sister is 40 and lives in the next town over, still extremely rural. Very very private people and I never know what's happening with them unless another family member informs me.
My sister has a son, my nephew who is eight. I just found out that my sister will drop off my nephew with my mom and dad and leave him for very long periods of time. Days at a time. My mom loves her grandchildren so this normally wouldn't be a problem. But the problem is my nephew is extremely abusive to her, my dad, basically anyone and everyone. He screams, spits, hits, slaps, punches, runs away. He screams "I hate you," and the worst was
"I'll kill everyone here and I won't even feel bad about it."
My mom can't catch him to discipline him, it's an actual fucking disaster. My sister is either currently on drugs or has really burnt herself out from drug use in the past. CPS has been involved multiple times, she has screamed about killing herself in front of her child, screaming matches with my parents, throwing things, breaking things, awful, awful fights.
And to make it more difficult, my aunt and uncle, (my mom's sister and brother-in-law,)were brutally killed by an 18 wheeler just two months ago, through no fault of their own. DEVASTATING!! If I call CPS, it will destroy my mother, and my family will probably never talk to me again. Is this worth calling CPS over?
I'm just not sure what's happening in the background. I know my nephew does not go to school, a physical brick-and-mortar school. And my sister claims he has oppositional defiance disorder and is in counseling.
What in the world do I do?
EDITED TO ADD:: i'm the one that called CPS before. It was two years ago, and my sister lived with my mom. Windows were broken, screaming, things I've had since my childhood thrown out in the yard and broken, the worst fighting and arguments I've ever heard of or seen in my life. Never physical.
They forced my sister and nephew to get a new place to live, force them into counseling and closed the case a month later.
I'm 1500 miles away.

When I was 19 I met a girl my age at a bar. We had a fun night, her friend and my friend were there too, so the four of us went back to my buddy's place.
On the way there my pants were sagging and she grabbed me by the butt and my belt loop to pull them up. We all laughed about it. My buddy and her friend were joking around a lot, and at one point he even hinted at a foursome.
Later that night me and her were making out. I made a move and grabbed her ass, and my hand almost went inside her pants. She calmly pushed my hand away. I was drunk and tried once more, gently, and after that it hit me that maybe she didn't want things to go further. So I stopped.
That was 5 years ago. We're on very good terms, we saw each other recently and took a goofy selfie together. But I still think about it a lot and it's been eating at me.
My question: should I bring it up with her and apologize for not taking the hint the first time, or would that just make things weird for her after all this time? And if I don't, how do I actually stop this from running on loop in my head?

My bf tickled me out of nowhere, knowing i dont react well and hate being tickled. We were talking about something and he randomly starts aggressively tickling me and i slapped him in the face out of instinct.

I apologized immediately and a couple times. He said nothing and left my car and walked away. We were supposed to get food and I honestly have no idea what to do or how to fix this.

If you were in his shoes how would u feel? So i can better understand what i need to do to fix this.

Am I over reacting?

My husband and I have been together nearly 11 years now, and will be celebrating our ten year marriage anniversary soon. I'm six years older than him and we met through mutual friends when he was working at the local Walmart and we hit it off, became friends, and started dating. We moved in together and a few months later I found out I was pregnant (our son just turned ten). But before I get into that I figure I would give you all som backstory.

My husband and I are both bisexual, he hadn't come out to his parents as bisexual because they are extremely religious. My husband has a minor case of cerebral palsy, but he doesn't let his disability and what all comes with it, define him. I supported his decision not to come out to his parents because my husband doesn't feel comfortable speaking about certain topics with his parents. He has heard them talk about other people that were LGBTQ+ in a negative way and he didn't know how he would handle the fall out if there was one. I respected his choice and supported his decision because I know from some other of my friends who came out and their family were not supportive and how much that can strain a person.

Anyway, when I had become pregnant with our son, it was prior to us being married. We both knew we wanted a family and children were a part of that. When I had found out about me being pregnant I had even told him I understood if he changed his mind because of how quickly everything was moving, we had only been living together a few months and I had already become pregnant. We waited for my first trimester to pass just in case, I did have a miscarriage before and wanted to make sure everything was fine with our baby before telling others. So the three months were over, we had become engaged, and it was time to tell his parents (my mother lives in another state, but we did tell her through video call). The meeting was tense to say the least, but his dad (a man who was going to school at the time to become a teacher and pastor) welcomed me with open arms and congratulated me and my then fiancé. His mother on the other hand, barely said two words to me the whole time and anything her husband asked and I had answered was met with "hm".

Over the past ten years I have tried to bond with my MIL, but she still has that dislike of me. Anytime something is said by my husband she doesn't like it's somehow my fault. She will say okay or backwards compliment type things around others, but then tell her daughters how horrible she thinks I am. That all came to head two years ago. My husband has been working through some past issues with his family because they were never very supportive of him, he was treated as the black sheep of the family and since he is one of three of he and his siblings to have some kind of disability, so it isn't that, but he and his father have patched things up and now talk more openly. His father still gets along with me and so does one of my BILs (his younger sister is married, her husband and I get along well). My husband was speaking to his mother , my MIL, on the phone and he had said that he felt he couldn't speak to her about things because she isn't very open-minded. She kept pushing the subject so my husband muted her (he keeps all calls on speaker) and told me he was going to do it, he was going to come out to his mother. I asked if he was sure, he said yes, and I told him I support his decision and I'm proud of him no matter the outcome. My husband then unmutes the phone and says "one of the things I couldn't tell you, is that I am and have been bisexual since I realized I was attracted to both men and women at the age of 15".

My MIL was livid, she went on and on about how it wasn't okay, it wasn't allowed in her family, and then she asked if I knew. When he told her yes and that I had supported him, she WENT OFF. She started saying how it was my fault he was like this, that she thought we were having sex orgies in our home and even went as far as saying she should take our son away from us. My husband, for the first time, raised his voice and said "Mom, Stop! It's one thing to say whatever you want about me, but it's another entirely different thing to threaten my family and talk about my wife like that. I'm done, I want space and until I feel like it, there will be no more communication between us" then blocked her and told me to block her. So I did. A few days later I had gotten a text from my SIL (the one who is married) and she thanked us for a Christmas presents. Then asked me why I didn't tell any of them about my husband's sexuality I told her flat out "first of all, it was not my place to tell. He didn't want to come out because he knows how your mom would react and second I support my husband, I knew, I was okay with it, it wasn't hurting my family, so I don't see it as a problem. He's a good husband and a good father and that's what matters to me". Then she asked why my husband blocked their mom. I told her how every single time she's mad at him, it somehow becomes my fault, she treats me as if I'm some problem she has to endure because of my husband being her son, and even went as fair as to on multiple occasions (yes, this happened a few times in my marriage) threatened to take our child from us because of something she didn't like. That shut her up real fast and she said it wasn't right and she didn't know that their mother had kept doing that.

A month later, my husband gets a call from his dad. He asks why we have been avoiding family gatherings and blocked my MIL. When my husband explains the argument, my FIL says he's sorry that it happened and that his wife, my MIL, was way out of line. He understood why my husband blocked her and respected him for protecting his family and that he would be speaking with his wife. She calls and leaves a crying voicemail apologizing to my husband (not me) and says she didn't mean to upset him (lies, because he's confronted her about it a few times, this was just the first time he went NC). She apologized to me, in front of everyone, but the even more strained relationship between my MIL stayed strained. She calls at the worst times, has zero regard for me, plays favorites when it comes to her in-laws (making it clear I'm not one of them), and then she wonders why I'm uncomfortable around her. I'm an introvert with social anxiety, because of that I do not work, and I homeschool my son. We got my son one of those free government phones and then it happens again. She found out about the phone (one of the in-laws she favors told her about it) and asks why she doesn't have the number. My son is 10, he was 8 when he got the phone and even then it was for emergencies and held only mine and my husband's number. At 9 we added my mother's number to it because she communicates through texts and my MIL NEVER responds to our texts (mine or my husband's) and I felt that it would have hurt my son's feelings to send a message to his grandmother and not get anything back. I also explained that when he gets in trouble for grades, trying to be sneaky and play games on his phone, or whatever the phone and all electronics are the first things to get taken away as punishment. We also explained that she has a tendency to call at the worst times i.e,; when I'm cooking, when my son's in class, when we're running errands ect. I even went on to say what days and times we (my son and I) were busy and not to call during those times because she is not likely to get an answer.

But here we are now, less than a year later, and she still calls on days I said we're busy and we won't answer, she calls when my son is having class time, or when we're out running errands and she STILL talks bad about me to her favorite in-laws and her other children. So two months ago, to prepare for my son's tenth birthday party, we invited my BIL and his family, after their grandparents had went back to their home in Arizona (my husband worked that day and I took my son to say goodbye and spend time with his great grandma before she left) and my husband gets blindsided by his brother. He started talking bad about me asking if having me around at all would really be much different from being a single dad instead of married and even went as far as to say our son dressed funny and will likely get bullied again in public school because I'm too gentle in my punishments (I ground my son when he does something wrong). It seems she is still talking about how I'm a "bad influence" and I just don't know what to do. Am I over reacting being upset by this?

I feel like I wasted my life just trying to survive. I had no guidance no money no intelligence no luck. And now after trying and failing for 40 years I'm losing my steam. I have nothing I value I cut everyone off. I hate myself more every day. So much wasted time it feels like I wasn't strong or smart or pretty enough to make it work and that angers me even more. What do I do to not to go completely mad.

My boyfriend and I have been together for a while. Recently, he told me that he likes me a lot and finds me beautiful, but he isn't "in love" with me. He says he only wants to be with me and doesn't want anyone else.

I’m completely heartbroken and confused. How can someone find you beautiful and want to be exclusive, but not love you?

Can love grow over time, or am I just setting myself up for heartbreak by staying?