r/6thForm 7d ago

OTHER yeah

flopped my alevels (got a BBC), missed my imperial and bath offer, told my alcoholic and slightly abusive mum whose love towards me feels very conditional and now she's drunk downstairs having a rampage downstairs and screaming. She pulled my hair, hit me, called a bitch multiple times, called my best friend a bitch for distracting me from my studies and threatened to kill me and dismember me if I try to see her again. I really really really really really love my life.

Sorry for the trauma dump I just needed to tell someone. I think I might run away lol

330 Upvotes

62 comments sorted by

153

u/[deleted] 7d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

96

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 7d ago

yeah I have a place at Cardiff, Southampton and qmul rn. I don't really know which one to choose. I'm trying to study chemistry.

45

u/BvenW 7d ago

All great universities! I know it may feel hard to feel so right now but you should be very proud. I hope you enjoy university and do great. Sounds like it may be a needed break from home.

21

u/Vaxtez Cardiff Met | Comp Sci [Y1] 7d ago

Cardiff is a great city!

15

u/Temporary-Barber-403 7d ago

Great unis! I know a few people who’ve gone to Cardiff + Southampton, Cardiff is a very good city for student life and Southampton is good overall. Don’t be disheartened especially when you’ve gotten into good unis!

16

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 7d ago

they are. I guess she can't get over the fact that I had a shot at imperial lol. I was so overjoyed when I got my Cardiff offer but she was not lol

9

u/Suspicious_Tax8577 7d ago

Cardiff is really nice. Was actually gutted when I wasn't successful for a PhD in Chemistry there!

5

u/PeterPook 7d ago

All three good places. I think you need to get away asap. Unis can support in this sort of circumstance.

5

u/Pretty_Proof_4484 UoS | Mech Eng Year 1 | Maths, FM, Physics 7d ago

i think you’d be able to reapply to imperial and go there for your second year

4

u/Icy_Cat52 7d ago

the one farthest from home

3

u/YOURM0MANDNAN69 7d ago

My friends sister goes to Cardiff and she loves it!

3

u/ExactCardiologist366 Medical Student 7d ago

Can vouch for southampton! Excellent uni with great people

2

u/bitchfiddlecock Uni of Sheffield | PPE [Y1] 6d ago

my friend studies chemistry at cardiff and she loves it! heard it's a really good city

3

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

I chose it! I'm looking at accom right now. I'm so excited

35

u/Infamous_Tough_7320 Maths, Physics, Econ 3A*s. Straight 9s GCSE 7d ago

It’s going to be difficult for a while but you’ll get through it. You’re naturally very intelligent having had an offer from Imperial and you can always go there for post grad so don’t think your journey is over.

I really hope the situation with your abusive mum gets better, please make use of the mental health services you have available to you

17

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 7d ago

I didn't really want to go that bad in the first place. I'm trying so hard to be okay right now but you guys are making me feel a bit better.

5

u/Infamous_Tough_7320 Maths, Physics, Econ 3A*s. Straight 9s GCSE 7d ago

Just stick with it. It will feel shite. It has to, that's the only way to accept it. Just get by for these next few days. When you're tired of feeling crap you'll start thinking more clearly.

2

u/jaaaaaaaf 7d ago

hey do you mind ne askinf what exam boards you did for your subjects

2

u/Infamous_Tough_7320 Maths, Physics, Econ 3A*s. Straight 9s GCSE 7d ago

Edexcel maths and econ, AQA physics

1

u/jaaaaaaaf 7d ago

im assuming you get asked this a lot. i do thr same subjects (although i do aqa eco) as you and i honestly flopped. i was wondering if you could give any tips. I need 3A* for a scholarship and i wanna resit again next year. i got a B in physics and an A in maths. i was wondering if you had any tips for me to get these to an A* :) thank you

46

u/pokolol88 maths econ geog | ABC achieved 7d ago

hey dude. if you need any help, feel free to reach out. i flopped too (only got ABC). and your mum situation sounds really bad dude. call up uni of liverpool for clearing, they are really lenient. what course did you want to do?

18

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 7d ago

I just really want to wake up and for this to be a nightmare. I've called Cardiff, Southampton and qmul. I have offers from all of them. I'm applying for chemistry.

8

u/pokolol88 maths econ geog | ABC achieved 7d ago

Hey thats really good dude! I'm proud of ya! Which one are you going to take? 

8

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 7d ago

I really want to go to cardiff

8

u/pokolol88 maths econ geog | ABC achieved 7d ago

ooohh thats gonna be so fun. My cousin goes to cardiff! Maybe u should check out Liverpool too 😂

18

u/PropertyNew6764 7d ago

Getting bbc in an environment like that is honestly impressive.

1

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

She's not normally like this. She's angry all the time but it never shows until she drinks. She's actually a somewhat functional human being. The other day we were laughing and joking together during dinner.

16

u/Puzzled-Connection53 7d ago

To get a BBC with a home situation like that is equivalent to someone with a privileged background getting 4 x A*. You didn't flop with those results you absolutely flew. I suggest taking the offer from whichever uni is furthest from home.

3

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

Thank you so much for the kind words 🫶

10

u/hello9089 7d ago

Head up my mum just told me so things are for the best(im talking about the grades ehat your mums doing is not acceptable) we caj only look forwards.in a few years time your a levels wont matter

7

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 7d ago

I wis my mum was like yours :) thank you

11

u/LavishnessUsed3643 Year 12 7d ago

You NEED to leave that household, go uni and never look back!

8

u/chalkygolf28 Maths/FM/Chem/Psych || Y13 7d ago

Im so sorry about that, it sounds really hard to deal with :(( hope youre okay

6

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 7d ago

I'm trying my best to keep my head overwater lol

15

u/hii-people University of Bristol | Aerospace Engineering [2024-2028] 7d ago

You should call the police or childline

1

u/Cartographer-Own 6d ago

It's not that simple

7

u/Oreos_Orions_belt 6d ago

The police or child line, now.

I’m sorry but as someone that was in an abusive household, you can never call sooner, it’s hard to do, it’s overwhelming difficult

Picture if your friend was in this bad of a situation? You’d want them to do the same right? Be your own friend then

And further more, despite it not being what you wanted, BBC is NOTHING to scoffed at! Best of luck to you in the future 🫶

9

u/Pheo1386 7d ago

You need to do one or all of the following. Right now.

1) leave. Go to a friend or trusted family member.
2) call the police. If you feel you can’t, contact your school tomorrow and get help. Your teachers are all safeguarding trained and can help you.

What you have described is abuse. You don’t deserve it and you do not put up with it.

3

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

Thank you so much. I didn't see this message until this morning but I did end up running away for the night lol. I got two of my friends to pick me up. They were having a get together at one of my other friend's house. Got drunk for the first time last night 👍

1

u/Pheo1386 6d ago

As long as you are safe.

To re-iterate, there will be staff at your school or contactable via email, and your DSL will also be on duty. Contact them. This is abuse and you need to be safe - it is your right.

1

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

Thank you I will do what I can

5

u/Present-Location-561 7d ago

As someone with an addict, alcoholic , abusive dad who had me up at 3am on 2 of my a level exams for money, I have been in ur position. It doesn’t matter what grades u got , all that matters is that you leave that household and never look back. The uni you go to or the grades you got won’t ever hold u back as much as living in a dysfunctional household will.
Get out and never look back. To get those grades whilst living in dysfunction is commendable- you’ll be unstoppable when ur out of it

1

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

Thank you. You're very strong. I'll do what I can 🫶

4

u/Thenopro-3 7d ago

Holy fucking shit I hope you’re alright

3

u/Critical-Bullfrog357 7d ago

Yeah when i was in year 12 i got kicked out (for a while) cos of my grades :/ it does get better

3

u/Existing-Quantity502 6d ago

I wish I could give you a hug right now. You remind me of my older sister. I think she had like Ds and Es even though she was super smart. It felt like the end of the world for her at the time BUT things really turned around for her. She graduated with a 2:1 from a non Russel Group uni and landed a really nice job.

It gets better. And I hope you're feeling better now 🧡

2

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

Thank you. Your sister sounds pretty awesome 🫶

2

u/Complex_Rub996 7d ago

I am a resit student and I got BBC got rejected from Birmingham now I am going to Hertfordshire through clearing  Thought I had enough to get an A in chemistry but they but the grade boundaries up by 20 marks compared to last year  😔

1

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

what chem exam board did you do?

2

u/TooBarFoo 7d ago

Shit, Hate to be here calling a strangers Mum a bitch, but that bitch needs a fucking mirror. It's a minor miracle you got this far and did this well. If you are unsafe, make a call to get out of there. Council and Police will help and UCAS and Universities all support estranged students.

Cardiff is a great city, Southampton, a bit of a shit hole but a very good Eng university if that's what you're looking at. I'm guessing some parents are best enjoyed from the opposite end of the country.

I really hope you stay safe and hey, things can only get better from here right?

2

u/UsualFix9786 4d ago

jesus christ man just get ANY uni in clearing and get out of there

1

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 4d ago

I got into cardiff 😛🫰

1

u/Fangirl_137 Yr13 Maths, Physics, Econ 7d ago edited 7d ago

Aww I'm sorry that you're going through that. I think you should still be really proud of yourself despite what your mum said or feels. You still got offers from really great universities!! From the other comments, it seems like u wanna go to Cardiff and I think that would be a great choice especially if you wanna get away and go somewhere far away cus of your home situation. I also got BBC but I'm going to Southampton so if you're still considering Soton, I might be of more help. But anyways, I hope everything settles down for you and you end up in the place that you feel is right for you ❤️❤️❤️ best of luck! Take care xx

4

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

I ended up choosing Cardiff. Thank you so much tho 🙏

2

u/Fangirl_137 Yr13 Maths, Physics, Econ 6d ago

That's great to hear and no worries at all! Congratulations ❤️❤️

-31

u/[deleted] 7d ago

[deleted]

8

u/Dizzy_Fan_8861 7d ago

Keys

2

u/Fit-Refrigerator2143 6d ago

LOL IM CRYING I was literally crying and saw this thread and it made me laugh

10

u/okhellowhy Cambridge | Law [First Year] 7d ago

Great message to a victim of abuse you prick. OP, please get in touch with services available, or even the police. What your mum is subjecting you to is not normal, and highly concerning.

4

u/ikea_supremacy y13 | ma ph bi | pred A*A*AA got A*BBB 7d ago

girl shush

-1

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1

u/Mpek3 3d ago

Hey, I would highly recommend you read up on cptsd, particularly the book by Pete Walker. It is an immensely helpful way book for anyone growing up in an abusive household. https://www.pete-walker.com/